


Mar Adentro - Seaward

by malu (orphan_account)



Category: MotoGP RPF, Motorcycling RPF, Sports RPF
Genre: A few chapters bordering on PWP, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Kissing, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Mile High Club, Wedding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-02
Updated: 2014-10-04
Packaged: 2018-02-11 10:38:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 93
Words: 134,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2064960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/malu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What will happen, when a simple kiss can turn your life upside down, when friends wait in the most unlikely places, when the greatest tragedy brings out the best in some and the worst in others...?</p><p> </p><p>  <em>At the first kiss I felt something melt inside me that hurt in an exquisite way. All my longings, all my dreams and sweet anguish, all the secrets that slept deep within me came awake, everything was transformed and enchanted, everything made sense.</em><br/>~Hermann Hesse</p><p>Full list of chapters with mini-summary & playlist: http://stripedsquirrel.tumblr.com/post/99128611357/mar-adentro-the-episode-guide</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue - Mar Adentro

**Author's Note:**

> **Never happened! Just imagination!**  
>  There was a bit of demand for a longer/fluffier version of them and this might become just that. And long it has become, though not exactly fluffier I suppose.  
> Reminder: This is a fictionalized second half for the 2014 season! The races haven't even started while I am writing!

Dani sighs and sinks on one of the chairs, stretching his legs and yawning openly. Those media obligations were really getting out of hand and this particular photo shoot has been more than a little stressful and annoying already. Yeah, taking pictures while he was supposed to battle with Marc could be fun, the boxing was really ridiculous, especially when Marc accidentally hit the camera. Other things have not been as fun though and the day as a whole has just been too long. He wonders if they have done it in this order on purpose so that both of them would be too tired and powerless to fight their last suggestion. If it has been a plan, it failed as they underestimated the younger rider's energy level dramatically. As soon as the photographer mentioned it, Marc had practically jumped off the set and stomped over to his manager.  
"We are supposed to do WHAT?" Marc glares at Emilio, who looks at the crew with desperation.  
"Calm down, Marc. It's just a photo. And we are sure the fans would love it and have fun with it." Dani is amazed by the calm reaction.  
"Have FUN with it?" Marc, on the other hand, does not seem to approve.  
"Can't we just hug and smile and go home?" Dani tries a suggestion, though he has little hope anyone would listen to him. It is not that he is actually eager to do it. In fact, he would rather not, but in the end, he does really want to get back to the hotel and it will not be that bad. It is just a second and if they try hard enough, they will only have to do it once. And anyway, it is clearly just for a photo. Marc's strong reaction surprises him a little, he would have expected the young man to be more open about it. Yet, at the end of the day he does not know much about Marc Marquez, because so far, the young rider has spent a lot of time avoiding him. Maybe it is because of his harsh reaction to the crash but he is not so sure, because it feels as if it started earlier or possibly has always been like that. It is not as if he gives anything about it, he has enough friends among the riders and as long as Marc stays rational, he can do whatever pleases him. With another deep sigh, Dani tries to tune in to the hectic conversations around him but there is too much talking, too fast, too loud, keeping him from understanding much. Marc and Emilio are still in a heated discussion and he does not miss that occasionally one of them throws a glare in his direction. Dani shrugs, it has not been his idea after all, and lets his head sink back, closing his eyes. _This might take a while._

In the end, Emilio wins and Marc does not look happy about it. The sight of the pouting young rider is actually pretty funny and Dani has to suppress a giggle, sitting across him and waiting for his makeup to be refreshed. For the last time, after a long day, they are turned from casual twenty-somethings into handsome catalogue models and Dani marvels at the swift and organized movements of the women who get them ready, no move wasted or too much, everything processing in record speed and so professionally, that he almost does not recognize himself in the mirror. Why a suit would have been necessary is beyond his knowledge and he feels uncomfortable and stiff in it, nevertheless, he has to acknowledge that it makes him look rather sophisticated and the same goes for Marc, who still, under all the makeup, has flushed cheeks and who still glares, openly, at everybody. "Okay, guys, let's get started." The girl that was spreading powder over his face pulls away and Dani walks over to where they want him, shoulders slouched and still not sure if this was really necessary and if in the end the fans could not have just done with a hug. _This_ was a bit much and might leave a rather lasting imprint on their image, leave alone the endless flood of internet reactions. He wonders what Honda is thinking and how they could hire such a company. Then, he has made it to their last set, standing in front of the wall and waiting for Marc, who is approaching reluctantly from the other side, stopping in front of the older rider and staring to the ground. _Avoiding me, again._ "Okay, go ahead." Dani can hear Marc take a deep breath and then their eyes meet and there is something strange in his look that Dani cannot identify right away. They both shuffle around a little awkward, after all, he supposes that this is a first for both of them. Finally, with the help of the crew, they end up standing slightly apart, Marc's arms loosely around his neck and Dani's on Marc's hips - both of which Dani thinks feels rather strange - , Marc's scent lingering in his nose because of the closeness - and if Dani did not know better, he would say it smells so good that it makes him shiver. Their faces are right in front of each other, their noses almost touching and Dani swallows hard, one final time, before he gives Marc a challenging look, trying to let him know that it is now or never. Apparently, the younger rider understood well as he is now leaning forward and - Dani thinks he can hear the relieved sighs from Emilio and the photographer - then Marc leans down to kiss him. The lips pressing against Dani's are surprisingly soft and there is a very strange sting in his guts and still a very inscrutable something in Marc's eyes and Dani feels really overwhelmed - and then it is over as quickly as it started. 

_y nadar mar adentro_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> y nadar mar adentro - and swim towards the open sea


	2. Dulce Introducción Al Caos - Sweet Introduction To Chaos

"Hey, you came back late last night."   
"Mhm. It was a long shoot." Marc shrugs and pours himself a coffee with one hand, the other rubbing his still sleepy eyes.  
"Oh, yeah. The promo thing. How was it?"  
Marc huffs. "Disturbing."  
"What kind of description is that after a photo session?"  
"I had to kiss Dani."  
Alex snorts cereal over the kitchen table and stares up to him, meeting his gaze. With his eyes widened in shock and his hair ruffled, he looks incredibly young, Marc thinks to himself. "You had to do what?"  
"They let us fight first, do videogames, play tennis and even boxing was including. And then they said they needed a 'final fluffy thing for the last page' and asked us to kiss," Marc's voice drips with sarcasm. In fact, he still thinks it is a stupid and irrational idea that will only get them loads of laughs from the other drivers. The reception among fans should be controversial and he acknowledges that it will get them a lot of publicity, but at the same time he doubts that there would not have been an alternative to this measure. Nevertheless, he has had little to say against Emilio when his manager asked him if he was homophobic. Emilio could not know, but it is a statement that in fact could not be any more wrong. Still, the true reason for his refusal is unmentionable, he cannot even tell Alex, much less Emilio and so he felt forced to comply, pressured into something that he regrets bitterly now.  
"How was it?" Alex curious voice drags him back into reality.   
He ponders on his answer for a moment, pretending to yawn, before he tries to reply as casually as possible, "Could have been worse. It's only been a second. But I really doubt that's going to get us the kind of publicity we want."  
Alex bursts into laughter. "It might be opening a whole new segment of fans for you though," the younger Marquez presses out under his giggles.  
With another brief huff, Marc nudges his little brother's head playfully. "Well, if it does work, you guys might have to pretend that you're in love." His little brother is still chuckling over the situation and Marc feels himself blush slightly and turns his head quickly, looking out of the window into a cloudless blue sky.  
Absentmindedly, he turns towards Alex and nudges his brother once more, growling "You wish." _Maybe I wish._  
Alex rolls his eyes and throws cereal at him now and when their mother enters the kitchen a minute later, Marc is just wrestling him down, further ruffling his hair and tickling his sides, the younger Marquez squirming, giggling and swearing at the same time. "No, no en mi cocina. No tiene gracia."* And their heads jerk up, meeting her angry gaze and both of them are desperately trying to suppress their laughter, because actually, it never ceases to be funny for them. They flee when her frown grows even angrier, stepping over the carnage from Alex's knocked over cereal and end up falling to the recliners outside, breathlessly giggling still. Having a younger brother like Alex is perfect, Marc thinks - not for the first time - , because if it was not for Alex, he does not know how he would ever manage to unwind. His eyes stare into the deep blue sky and he listens to his own breath, slowly calming to its normal rhythm.  
"Do you like Dani?" Alex voice interrupts Marc's peace and the question makes him turn deep red, grateful that they are not looking at each other, both staring up instead.  
He wills his voice to be stable for his response. "I don't know. He seems nice but we're rivals. We usually ignore each other."  
"Oh. Okay."  
"Okay?" _What does he mean with that?_  
"I just thought, you know, you always wanted to grow up and be like him, you said that in all the interviews when you were little and now you've been teammates for more than a year and you hardly talk about him."  
Marc bites his lips. _Sometimes, of course, having a little brother like Alex, who knows you better than you know yourself, is a royal pain in the ass._ "Well, it's just different when you're officially competing. I haven't thought about him very much."  
They both fall silent, watching the sky. Marc thinks about how he admired Dani, all his life, and how he walked up to the shorter man for the first time as a teammate last year, nervous enough to throw up or pass out in front of him and how he met those dark brown eyes so close to his there in that pit, piercing him curiously, squirming under the other rider's gaze. And he remembers the strange bubbly feeling in his stomach, that at the time, he could not even interpret. Now, he knows what it was. Knows that he had learned what butterflies in a stomach feel like. And in the months after, he learned about unrequited love. Hiding emotions. And jealousy and the feeling of your heart shattering into little pieces, when your secret object of affection introduces everyone to their new girlfriend, basically snogging her in front of the team.  
"Marc?" Again, his little brother interrupts his daydreaming. Marc hums slightly annoyed now. "You might be older than me and wiser with a lot of things, but you are a really bad liar."   
Alex said it very casually, not offensive at all, but the implication makes Marc turn bright red again. _I love you little brother, but sometimes I want to strangle you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *No, not in my kitchen. That is not funny."   
> I hope that's okay to say this way, my Spanish is rusty to say the least. Feel free to correct me ;)


	3. La Lluvia Gris - Grey Rain

Dani wants to forget. All he wants right now is to forget that inglorious kiss, stuff it away in the back of his head and never hear of it again. And even if he managed to ignore it rather well during the day, where other obligations kept him distracted, the image inevitably returns at night, creeping into his head uninvited, the memory of Marc's soft lips so palpable that he feels them on his while he is lying there. His eyes are squeezed shut, the heat is swallowing his body, draining his energy. Tossing and turning in his sheets, he wonders about the age gap and whether or not it should freak him out only to realize that he has not even wondered about why he suddenly wants to be with a man. The mere thought of him desiring another man in that way makes him nauseous. It does not help that he has broken up with Ana recently - or maybe this is just a reaction to their break up? He wishes he could believe it, tries to convince himself of it and at the same time, remembering that look in Marc's eyes, those dark brown drops of chocolate, he knows it is not just that. It is so much more.  
He sighs exasperatedly and disentangles from his sheets, covered in sweat from the unbearable sticky heat in the bedroom - or from the images that are playing in his head? Slowly, he steps on the balcony in only his boxers, the cool air and drizzles of rain making him shiver. With his back against the wall he sits down on the floor tiles, staring into the black sky. He is not gay, right? All his life he has been attracted to women exclusively and the thought of getting closer to another man has not even crossed his mind - until now. How could a little kiss - that actually was only a peck - cause that much of turmoil inside him, twist his stomach, tie his throat and swallow all of his thoughts? How could he have worked with Marc for more than a year without anything like this ever happening and now that tiny gesture has turned his world upside down? With nervous fingers, Dani picks up a rumpled carton of cigarettes from a low table next to him and lights one. _Oh Vale, I hate you for forgetting them here._  
The small rider follows the barely visible lines of smoke with his eyes, contemplating on Vale who has become one of his closer friends around the paddock over the years and who would probably understand - or would he not? Actually, he does not know Vale's position on this. Would he laugh or be disgusted? Dani sighs again, focusing on the sound of the rain splashing down now, trying to tune out the discussions in his head only to have images of Marc appear, images of a face that until a couple of days ago was just that of his teammate and that now suddenly appears in all details, every little bit making him shiver, the dark eyes that almost turn black whenever the younger man is focused, excited, the way his lips twitch, the little damp streaks of dark hair that cling to his forehead when he takes of his helmet, the way he sometimes crinkles his nose... even his scent returns into Dani's head, the unique mix of some kind of soap or shampoo and oil. Shaking his head like a wet dog, trying to shake away the images, Dani tells himself for possibly the hundredths time that this is ridiculous, that Marc is not gay, too young and does not even like him - realizing that the point that he thinks of himself as _not gay_ only comes at the end of the list. With the nauseous feeling spreading in his guts again he stubs the offending cigarette, making a mental note to blame Vale for it and steps back inside, the humid heat almost knocking him out. With an angry huff, he throws himself face first into the sheets. _What a ridiculous reaction to a simple photo shoot._

_La lluvia gris, casi siempre un rechazo_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> La lluvia, casi siempre un rechazo - The rain, almost always a rejection


	4. Locura Transitoria - Transitory Madness

They've had a busy day with working out, rounds at the dirt track and some family obligations - including cleaning the kitchen - and at sunset, they find themselves stretched on the same recliners again where they fled to in the morning. They're both sprawled on their backs lazily, wearing boxers only, their tan skin contrasting with the immaculate, white towels under them, a shared bottle of beer on the tiles between them. "So you like Pedrosa." _Alex is not letting that one go easily._ Still, Marc tries ignoring the question. "Why? Are you into smaller men?" Alex is nagging now and Marc feels frustration spread through his veins.  
"Alex!" Marc huffs exasperatedly.  
"What?" Of course, his younger brother is not impressed.  
"I don't want to talk about it." He really doesn't. Besides, he feels too drained to discuss this. After the events at the photoshoot his night had been rather restless, all the images of Dani running havoc on his mind.  
His younger brother apparently has a lot more energy left, returning defiantly, "I do."  
"Why?" _Yeah, Alex, why is this suddenly so important?_  
"Because I'm curious. You like a man and you being into guys is still new to me. And I've been disappointed for a while that you didn't just tell me."  
Marc props his head up, too intrigued to let this go any longer. "How did you know in the first place?"  
Alex sits up and when their eyes meet in the dim light of the setting sun Marc sees his younger brother smirk. "I know you. Your eyes sparkle when you are forced to talk about him. And sometimes you stutter when he is close. You've also ignored him pretty openly around the paddock. Could only mean this." His younger brother shrugs casually and Marc feels his cheeks heat up. "Have you ever talked to Dani about it?"  
"Alex, he is not even gay." He glares at his brother who holds his gaze without so much as batting an eyelid.  
"What makes you think that changes anything?"  
Marc sighs impatiently. "It changes everything. He has a girlfriend."  
"Had a girlfriend. She left him for a soccer player." Well, now Marc suppresses a smile. Not that it changes anything about Dani's sexuality. _Still it sounds good._ He tunes back in to Alex's voice who has not stopped talking about it yet. _Acting strangely obsessive about my love life, little brother._ "...and I doubt that there is such a thing as gay and straight for everybody. There has to be some grey between the black and white." Well, his little brother sure is an optimist.  
"Alex, I really don't want to talk about it," Marc interrupts harshly, because he is really running out of patience for this right now and thinking about Dani in general makes him depressed and hopeless, no matter how hard Alex tries to cheer him up. In the end, Marc prefers not to have any hopes raised, because by now he has learned that everytime a flicker of hope turns up, there will be immediately a big bang crushing the tiny spark - and his heart. That devastating disappointment is a feeling he can well live without.  
"Are you at least looking for someone to distract you if you insist on avoiding Dani? You could always try for Alvaro or maybe Nicky, they're both kinda-"  
"Alex!" Without thinking much about it, Marc reaches for the bottle and pours the rest over Alex body, ripping a shocked and unmanly squeal from the younger Marquez, who jumps up in turn and chases him towards the pool.  
Much later, when after an exhausting battle throughout the yard, only ended by the determined intervention of their - again - frowning mother, they have both retreated to their bedrooms, Marc is spread on his sheets, staring at the ceiling and replays Alex's words in his head. _There has to be some grey._ How he wishes those words were true.  
Then, as soon as he closes his eyes, the images return, the same seconds before the kiss on auto-repeat in his head, Dani's smell flooding his nose, the dark eyes that evade his gaze, the nervous twitching of his lips, the soft skin of his neck against Marc's arms when they found themselves arranged into an awkward embrace. Flashing memories of the feeling of Dani's lips against his, briefly, softly and the strange look of shock in Dani's eyes when they had pulled away, the instant where their eyes locked before both of them had lowered their heads and blushed. In Marc's head, the pictures appear again and again, making him toss around and fight with the sheets forever. Later, they mix with memories of other events, other times where he had been close to Dani. Celebrations on the podium where he nervously focused on whoever else was on there as long as his eyes did not have to meet Dani's, afraid to give away his secret longing. Press conferences where he had to sit next to the smaller man, helplessly surrendering to the smell of his aftershave and his own skin burning with every accidental contact of their bare arms, elecrifiying shivers running down his spine. He is literally mad about him and has been ever since that first moment they met as teammates and he clearly understands the concept of "being in too deep" - but a cure seems nowhere near. His attempts at distraction - he wouldn't tell Alex but of course he had tried - had never helped for more than a night, rather only for an hour or so, the fascination always ending with the afterglow, when pictures of Dani would inevitably flood back into his head. Right now, he is preparing mentally for another sleepless night. _That shooting really didn't help at all._

_y cruzo_  
 _la línea divisoria_  
 _que separa en esta historia_  
 _la locura y la razón_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "and I cross the line that divides madness and reason within this story"


	5. Cosas Que Contar - Things That Count

"It's simple. You have to kiss him again."  
Dani's head jerks around, his eyes glaring at the Italian, who is unimpressed, absentmindedly fidgeting with his lighter. It's a much cooler night than the one two days ago, when Dani had found the remnants of Vale's last visit and decided to reach out to the older rider for advice. They're both cuddled up in their hoodies, sitting against the wall on the cold balcony tiles, the night falling down on them slowly. Still, Dani couldn't say whether he shivered because of the cold or the images that Vale's comment, the mere mention of the word "kiss" had caused to pop up in his head. "You've got to be kidding me," he huffs at the Italian after a while, still frowning.  
"No, I'm being totally serious." Vale's voice is indeed very genuine, as much as Dani tries, he finds no mockery in it. After a brief pause and a drag on his cigarette, the older rider continues, "You have to do it again to find out if it was just a shock reaction or if you're actually into him."  
"I am not into him. I'm straight," Dani glares again but Vale only chuckles.  
"Yeah, and that's why you can't forget the feeling of babychamp's lips on yours." This time, there's mockery. And if Dani is honest with himself, he has to admit that Valentino is probably right.  
"Marc is not interested in me. He is straight," Dani returns, voice full of resignation. Because really, his own feelings do not matter as they won't be reciprocated.  
"You won't know until you try," the Italian says with a contemplating voice, a spark within it telling Dani that there's something more behind the simple statement.  
With shaky fingers from the cold, he takes another of Vale's cigarettes and lights it, pretending not to see the frown on the other man's face. His eyes follow the movements of the smoke, while he ponders on the Italian's words. "How would you know?"  
There is a brief pause, before Valentino replies, his answer shaking Dani's world in its foundations, "Been there, done that."  
The Spaniard coughs on his own breath from shock, earning himself a dry chuckle from the other and then, still coughing slightly, he presses out, "What?"  
"Nicky and me went through the same." Dani is pretty sure that if it wasn't for the wall behind his back, he would just faint there and then. Instead, he feels himself blush and has another coughing fit. Under the amused eyes of Valentino, he struggles to catch his breath and regain his composure.  
"Nicky?" Dani's voice is still croaky and Vale just nods casually, as if the revelation was nothing special. _And in a perfect world, it would be totally normal._

Dani would have wanted to talk for a long time after that, but Valentino is hesitant to reveal more. The Spaniard doesn't fully understand but he assumes that with a secret as huge as this, it is rather difficult to be open, even towards a good friend. Also, the way he dealt with his own sexuality must have made Vale feel as if this could be an issue for Dani. Instead of speaking, they sit in silence, both hanging after their own thoughts, until Vale excuses himself, wanting to get back to his hotel - and suddenly, Dani understands why the Italian didn't want the guest room. They hug to say goodbye and before he closes the door, he gives Vale a last, reassuring squeeze and a dirty smirk. "Next time you visit, you could bring someone with you... the guest room has a double, you know?"  
Vale gives him his most beautiful smile, like that of a child on Christmas morning, in return, lightening up Dani's world, before winking at him. "Great. And I have a plan for your dilemma, just wait until the next race. I think it'll get you all the answers you need right now." With that rather cryptic statement, the older man is gone and Dani is left by himself, bound for another sleepless night. And when the feeling of Marc's lips crawls back again, all he thinks is how he wants to kiss those full and soft and tempting lips again, kiss them every day for the rest of his life.

_Y besarte cada día_  
 _Sin saber quien soy_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _and kiss you every day without knowing who I am_


	6. La Chispa Adecuada - The Right Spark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The idea for the plot of this chapter is taken from the wonderful Argentinian movie "Plan B" by Marco Berger and just as I always suggest to check out the music in the titles, I'd totally recommend to watch. It's the most beautiful love story ever.

No, Marc seriously has no idea how they ended up in Vale's hotel room. All he can figure out right now, with his head spinning and his vision slightly blurred, is that they drank a lot of wine. In fact, they brought the bottles and are still drinking. Well, Nicky actually isn't. He passed out on the bed as soon as they entered the room. Vale even had to help him make it through the hallway without bumping against every single door on the way. Anyway, Marc wonders about the strange constellation. Of course, Vale and Dani do hang out occasionally, but how Nicky fits in is still a mystery... though, at some points of their evening, there were looks exchanged between the Italian and the Kentucky Kid that - if Marc didn't know better - totally implied a good reason for the American to be here. How Marc himself ended up in this is completely beyond his grasp then, neither of the three being someone he would usually hang around with, especially not a certain Spaniard who haunts him in his dreams enough already. _Valentino asked me to join... didn't he??_ In the end, it doesn't really matter how it happened anymore though, for right now he is sitting on the floor between Vale and Dani, their backs against the end of the double bed on which Nicky is snoring peacefully, half full bottles of wine around them and some Spanish rock music roaring from the side. His eyes are darting back and forth between the possibly greatest Italian legend of his sport and his Spanish childhood hero who has become his first true crush and he feels slightly nauseous, his stomach flipping at the overwhelming feeling of being in a situation he would dream of during his restless nights. His cheeks are burning and he feels dizzy, and he is pretty sure that it's not just because of the alcohol. Instead, he is drunk from Dani's smell that keeps crawling up to his nose, mixed with the scent of wine and the smoke of Vale's cigarettes. Marc has to use all of his self-control not to jump at the latter, devour the Spaniard's gorgeous face next to him, Dani looking slightly disheveled, cheeks flushed and eyes beaming with excitement while he talks to Vale, agitatedly and with a lot of laughter, a conversation that Marc's head cannot process at the moment because the expressions on Dani's face have taken over his complete attention. Finally, he brings up enough will power to look away, ending up staring at Vale instead, who is gesturing wildly with his hands and slurring while he speaks. Slowly, Marc manages to tune in to the conversation, picking up Valentino's last line and it makes his heart skip a beat and lets his pulse start racing. "So, ever kissed a guy, Pedrossssa?"  
Marc turns and with relief, he sees Dani shake his head. "No. I'm not gay." Marc's heart shatters at the words and his blood seems to freeze.  
"Dearrrrr Da-ni... you won't know unless you try!" Marc sees Vale wink and smirk dirtily now and there is a strange, nervous anticipation building up in his system, while his eyes jump between the two men at his sides, who seem to have an entire wordless conservation right under his nose - and he doesn't understand a thing.  
"Don't have anyone to try with," Dani returns after a while, taking another large gulp from the bottle.  
"I would," Vale says and a part of Marc would love to punch him - while another part of him craves to see it. Dani however just shakes his head. "Oh come on, Pedrosssa, you want to. Or would you rather kiss Marc?" The youngest of the three almost chokes on a sip of wine, coughing helplessly while Vale's smirk grows more and more devilish by the second. "Don't be a coward, Da-Ni, kiss me!"  
And not in his wildest dreams would he have believed it, but it actually happens, Dani lets Vale cup his face, pull him closer and kiss him. It's right in front of Marc's face and the young rider is sober within an instant, feeling a wave of jealousy crash right over him that is burning him from the inside and he bites his lip hard to hold back his emotions. It's brief and rather chaste, much like the one he had with Dani and Dani pulls back with a deep red face. _He is adorable when he is embarrassed._  
Valentino must think the same, as he is chuckling at the image. "See, it's not bad. Now try with Marc!"  
Shell-shocked, Marc shakes his head wildly.  
"Oh, bambino, don't be silly, it feels good! Dani's got great lips."  
It feels like being at the shoot all over again and Marc cannot help the feeling that it won't stop if he doesn't do it. Actually, Dani doesn't even look all that thrown back by it right now. After another sip of wine, Marc puts the bottle away, inhaling sharply and he reaches over for Dani's face, pressing a peck on his lips that in all it's briefness feels so stupidly perfect that he could cry. His eyes stay locked with Dani's and the world stops turning for a second when Marc thinks he sees something like genuine affection in the older rider's eyes - then he blinks and it's gone. Instead, he hears Vale giggle. "Don't be cowardly kids. Have a proper kiss!" If there's anything that makes Marc courageous, it's defiance and he certainly doesn't want to be labelled a coward and with a mix of protest and wine-bravado, he cups Dani's face and kisses him again and Dani actually plays along, he feels the Spaniard's hands in his neck, sending a shiver down his spine and when he opens his lips, Dani mirrors the move so that this time, their tongues meet. Marc is in a mode of complete overload, drowning in Dani's touch, melting under his hands and beautifully surprised at the gentleness. And then, after a moment that felt both like a second and a month in one, they break apart and the three of them burst in a fit of laughter.  
For a little longer, they chat about meaningless things, laughing too much and speaking too loud. There are a few moments where Marc thinks he catches a gaze from Dani, a somehow puzzled look, a bit of disbelief on the older riders face. And maybe a little too much affection for the kiss to have been just a joke? Eventually, they end up emptying the other bottles and crash on the bed along with Nicky. Marc is too far gone to process what he sees when Vale cuddles up against the American who sleepily responds by dragging the Italian closer, their foreheads touching and their bodies flush against each other now. The young Spaniard ends up on his back, just like Dani next to him, and there is no way Marc can sleep now, feeling far too wound up from the events. Dani's lips tasted incredible, wonderful, like salt and alcohol and just Dani. And the taste is imprinted in Marc's brain. _I think I will never be able to sleep again._  
He cannot see the self-assured grin on Valentino's face who falls contentedly asleep with the thought that this plot should have been enough to push the young riders in the right direction.

_todo arde si le aplicas la chispa_  
 _adecuada_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _everything burns when you use the right spark_


	7. En Brazos De La Fiebre - In The Arms Of Fever

Waking up is not pleasant for Dani the next morning, feeling feverish with his head threatening to explode and his stomach twisted in a knot. It takes him a lot of effort to find his orientation and open his heavy eyelids, blinking slowly at a surreal scenery. He is sprawled on his back on a bed, still in his jeans and shirt. So far, so good, that can happen. It is not his bed though - and that might become an issue. Actually, he is not alone in the bed, which is slightly scary. It really must be a dream, because on his one side, Nicky Hayden is cuddled up sound asleep against Vale, the Italian's arms tightly wrapped around the American's body and their foreheads touching, slight snoring emerging from them. Then, he feels something stir at his other side and he turns his head, slowly and just in time to see Marc Marquez roll over and sleepily drape an arm around his chest, head nuzzling in his hair. This is seriously scary now. Though Dani is acutely aware that his cock has its own opinion on the matter and is ready to rise to the occasion. That is such an inappropriate thing that he determinedly wills himself to think of something else - which is difficult when the young man is now pressing his entire body against Dani's side and his body heat and soft skin are burning, scorching the small Spaniard, while Marc's scent mixed with wine and smoke, is overwhelming him. He turns his head a little further, his nose now against Marc's forehead and black streaks tickling his eyes. Then, the memory returns - at least, Dani thinks it's a memory and not just a dream, because it feels a little to real to be made up. It's all coming back to his mind, he kissed Vale and it was awkward and then there was Marc - and it was anything but awkward. Vale had won, the Italian had really won with his plot. Dani had actually kissed those soft lips again and now he knows for sure that he enjoys kissing Marc. It had definitely not been a one-time thing. In fact, the way they are lying here, the way his cock is reacting at everything, is not quite subtle, it's a damned obvious declaration that his self-definition of being a straight man might no longer suit him. The realization makes his stomach flip unpleasantly.  
Then, the man next to him starts stirring and Dani's pulse starts to race, his nerves wrecked by his anxious wait for Marc's response to this. Probably, the young man will just scream and run, Dani ponders, swallowing hard now. Marc's head is slowly pulling away from Dani's head and Dani sees his sleepy and flushed face now, watches his beautiful brown eyes, the gorgeous drops of chocolate, open ever so carefully, blinking just like Dani's did at first. And while the smaller rider holds his breath, he studies the expressions on Marc's face change from confusion over embarrassment to something else Something, that against Dani's expectation does not look like fear or horror or shock at all but rather like... _I'd almost call it affection_. Marc blushes adorably and the older man sees the young rider gulp and then the young man is just about to start speaking, when an Italian expletive behind Dani's head makes them jerk their heads around. "We overslept. Guys, we will all be late for training if we don't seriously hurry. Now." With that, the almost magic moment is gone as quickly as it came. Four men jump up in a huge hurry, faces deep red and there is not a single word spoken when Dani and Marc flee to their respective rooms and Nicky runs to Vale's bathroom. Dani runs towards his door, hoping not to be seen, not even wanting to imagine the consequences if Honda found out that their riders spent the night together, leave alone that they drank themselves almost unconscious the night before a practice session, in the room of one of their enemies in the battle for the championship. No, he really doesn't want to find out what that would get them into. Luckily, he manages to slip into his bedroom unnoticed and under the stream of cold water in his shower, he finally releases the breath he's been holding ever since Marc opened his eyes. _And shit. The first kiss made me sleepless for weeks, this one's going to make me restless for the rest of my life._ There's certainly no way he will ever be able to look Marc in the eyes, not after that. He understands Vale's idea behind it, but the way it turned out is not what he expected. When they talked about luring Marc into that kiss, Dani had expected the second time to be uncomfortable and awkward, finally making his obsessive thoughts about the young man stop once and for all and letting him return to his _normal_ girl-loving self. Yet, the devilishly grinning doctor had won this one and now there's no easy way out. Dani turns off the shower and dries himself roughly with the towel, trying to rub away the inappropriate thoughts that are crawling into his mind again. And it feels horribly wrong, dragging Marc, who is almost a kid, into that situation, compromising him. Dani sighs and starts rummaging for his clothes. There had been that one moment this morning, and that instant after their kiss, where briefly he saw this spark of something else flash in Marc's eyes, something else that looked surprisingly much like affection. Swiftly, the small man shakes his head. Probably, that had been either the alcohol or wishful thinking. Possibly both.

_el disparate del caos_  
 _me derroto_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _the nonsense of chaos defeated me_


	8. Rayando El Sol - Reaching For The Sun

_esta pena, me duele, me quema sin tu amor_

As much as it surprises himself, Marc not only manages to pull off a decent practice, he also scores pole during qualifying. That's about it with the good news for the day though. It's still glistening hot and he's sat in the shade of a motorhome, Alex by his side, waiting for the day to end. Memories of Dani and what they did the previous night have been haunting him all day, at the most unsuitable times, occupying his mind fully. The taste of wine and smoke, the smell of detergent and shampoo, the feel of softest skin and evening stubble, it's always there, making Marc shiver and crave. He is experiencing a longing and a passion that he hadn't even known he was capable of - and all just because of one kiss. Well, more like one kiss and two pecks. Still, he has fallen way too deep, too fast and too easily. There's no way out anymore. He remembers the devastating feeling when Vale was kissing _his_ Dani, right in front of his face, this moment, where despite the hot and sexy scene in front of him, all he had wanted to do was attacking Valentino, send him away, tell him to get off. And Dani hadn't pulled away when he had cuddled up against the small man, right? Okay, he had pretended to be asleep and maybe the older rider just hadn't wanted to wake him. Or maybe it had only been the rest of the alcohol. But really, Dani had let him cuddle him. A completely straight guy wouldn't have let him do that. _Would he?_ Marc sighs with desperation, earning a deep frown from Alex, who has voiced his concern over Marc's obsession several times today already. But even if he wanted to - Marc doubts he could stop himself from feeling this way. Somehow he had ended up right under Dani's spell and no one but the most gorgeous small Spaniard could release him. _And that better happen quickly, because this unrequited desire is driving me up the walls._  
Then, he almost lets out a yelp when Alex nudges his ribs harshly, pointing to the motorhomes a bit across from them. And there _he_ is.

Marc watches Dani breathlessly, the smaller rider leaning against a bulk of tires across from them, talking to Vale. Alex is following his eyes and nudges him but Marc doesn't respond, entirely focused on the scene in front of him. Vale and Dani seem to be discussing something intensely at first, but then Dani shrugs with resignation and they fall silent. Marc sees Vale rummage for his cigarettes and feels another nudge in his ribs. "Did you know he smokes?"  
Marc nods. "Kind of." _Please don't ask me how I found out._ He keeps watching, the two older drivers now leaning wordlessly against the wall of another motorhome and after a while, Vale gives Dani a friendly pat on the shoulder and walks away. Marc is glad that he and Alex are sitting in the shade, well hidden and most likely not visible for the Italian. Dani stays right there, still smoking and looking smaller than ever, slightly lost, his shoulders slouched and his view fixed to the floor.  
"Don't be a coward." Alex elbow slams into his ribs again. _And somehow those exact words have worked before, I think._  
Marc lets out an exasperated huff before he slowly gets on his feet, his legs trembling already with nervousness. He walks over to Dani, who doesn't notice him yet, because the smaller man's eyes are on the floor still. The closer he gets, the more beautiful the Spaniard gets, his bronze skin, the ruffled dark hair, the broad shoulders, certainly broader than Marc's. Then, he gets close enough for Dani to hear his steps and the small man lifts his head up. Marc watches the expression on Dani's face with fascination, seeing it switch from surprise to happiness. Encouraged by Dani's initial reaction, Marc gets a final step closer, coughs briefly and then, finally, manages to start speaking, his voice only slightly trembling, "Hey!"  
"Hey... congrats for the pole!" He sees Dani blush and finds it adorable and then the smaller rider continues, "Can I do anything for you?"  
 _Because I'd only come to you if I need something._ Marc coughs again. "Erm, I thought... maybe we could have a drink at the hotel bar together later?" His heart is threatening to burst with nervousness now, while he awaits Dani's response.  
The smaller man shakes his head and Marc's heart stops beating, his stomach twisting instantly. "Not at the bar. What about... maybe... couldn't we go to my room?" Marc almost sighs with relief and nods eagerly.  
"Sure. Should I just... knock some time?"  
Dani tilts his head, thinking for a moment. "Let's say nine, okay?" Marc nods again, trying to be less eager this time. _Not just okay, perfect!_

_rayando..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _I'm sad, I'm hurting, I'm burning up without your love_
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> _reaching..._


	9. Días De Borrasca - Stormy Days

This is by far the most nervous Dani has felt lately and the idea of having this meeting a night before the race is ridiculously stupid. Also, having sweaty palms, a dry mouth, shaky hands and a twisted feeling in your guts only because your teammate comes over is ridiculous. Checking your outfit in front of the mirror, picking your tightest black jeans, running your hands over a somewhat rumpled team hoodie, that's ridiculous. Fixing your hair as if you were going on a date is ridiculous. All in all, Dani is behaving like a desperate teenager - and that's even though Marc probably just wants to have a drink with him. _Or... well... inviting him to my room instead of the bar has been pretty obvious. I declared intentions, didn't I?_ Possibly, Dani challenged himself to much with that though because right now, he just wants to run away and hide, not feeling ready at all for what he may or may not have suggested to Marc. _You don't meet in private because you only want to talk, do you? How far will he want to go?_ Maybe he should have talked to Vale about this? But when he spoke to the Italian in the afternoon, Marc had not suggested the meeting. Vale had pretty much laughed at him for still trying to find excuses for liking the kiss and the older rider had explicitly told him that denial of his feelings, as wrong as they might feel, would not make them go away. Dani acknowledges that this is probably true and checks his image in the mirror again, releasing a desperate breath at his own actions and then he looks at his watch, five minutes to nine. His heart picks up a little more speed yet again and he wonders if the headline "young motorcyclist dies from heart attack" would have to appear in tomorrow's paper. Then, he is just walking over to the minibar to check the content, there's a knock at the door. _The_ knock. Dani freezes on the spot for a second, before he manages to walk to the door, opening it slowly and with a trembling hand. A beaming Marc Marquez is stood in front of it, only the flickering of his eyes giving away to Dani that the younger rider is indeed nervous as well. He lets him inside without a word and then, the door shut behind them, they stand in front of each other, avoiding to lock gazes. Dani swallows hard. _What do you say now? Hey Marc, I kinda liked kissing you. Can we try again?_  
Of course, it's Marc who raises his voice first. "Hi! I'm glad this worked out." _His voice is shaky, how cute! So he really is not here just as my teammate._  
"Yeah, me too. Glad you found the time!" Dani smiles at Marc nervously and gets lost in the young man's dark brown eyes instantly, like coffee and chocolate, bitter and sweet and delicious. And that mouth, so soft, so tempting. It had felt like bliss to kiss him and pulling away had been so hard, had required so much self-control. Irritated, he sees Marc's lips turn into a self-assured smirk and Dani realizes that he unconsciously licked his lips while watching the other rider. He feels himself blush and looks away quickly. "Make yourself at home," he mumbles while he makes a vague gesture towards the chairs next to the window and with an increasingly shaky voice, he adds, "Would you rather have beer or wine?"  
"What about water?" Marc is behind him now, from the rustling on the floor he must be taking a seat. "We have a race tomorrow and after last night, I'm not really ready for more alcohol."  
The mention of the last night makes Dani's face turn and even darker shade of red. "O-okay." He reaches into the minibar and then goes to sit down on the chair next to Marc, holding out a bottle of water and staring at his own feet. He opens himself a beer, convinced that without any drinks, he will not be able to make it through this.  
"Cheers," Marc says, playfully knocking their bottles against each other and when Dani nervously looks at his face, the young man is smiling genuinely and questioningly at him.  
"So... you invited me?"  
Dani swallows hard. "And you wanted to see me."  
"I did. I still do."  
"What for?" Dani thinks his heart is exploding now and he finally looks into Marc's face when there is no reply, finding the young rider staring at him with almost black eyes and slightly parted lips. It's more than tempting and Dani carefully allows himself to check the rest of the young man, noticing - possibly for the first time - his broad shoulders in that team T-Shirt, the golden tone of the skin of his arms, the long legs in snug-fitting dark denim. _Dammit. Why is he suddenly hot?_ The smaller man is holding his breath, his eyes resting on Marc's lap for a little too long, making him blush and look back up into Marc's face hurriedly, the younger rider grinning back at him, that most annoying - and lately, also most beautiful - smile Dani knows. There is something dangerous in Marc's eyes, the way he is staring back at him now and it makes Dani shiver.  
"What do you think I'm here for." Marc speaks very softly, his voice electrifying Dani from head to toe.  
The older man shrugs slowly and lowers his gaze. "I think I know what you want... But I don't know... I mean... I am not - " He stops when he sees Marc get up from his chair, moving to stand right in front of him and when Marc reaches for his hand to pull him up, Dani follows like hypnotized.  
"I just wanted to see you. We don't have to do anything. We can just talk if you want to." Marc's smile suddenly is not confident at all anymore, instead, the young man is obviously nervous, even blushing now. And Dani releases the breath he's been holding, relieved Marc doesn't expect him to go anywhere or cross any lines tonight. And they stand there, in each other's private space, evading each other's gaze nervously and neither of them speaks. A spiral of thoughts is swirling in Dani's head, leaving him wondering and pondering why Marc really searched him out, whether the young man is just curious or only wants to talk, or whether, as unlikely as he would have thought it to be a day ago, Marc is really here because the kisses felt as good to him as they have for Dani. And why is everything about the taller rider suddenly attractive? _Have I really turned gay over night?_ The twisted, uncomfortable feeling in his guts won't go away but at the same time, Marc's scent and the heat radiating from his body make him shiver with arousal. Dani lets his eyes wander up again, searching Marc's gaze and when he finds it, he fixes the young man, studying his reactions carefully, while he reaches out with a shaky hand to brush over Marc's cheek, the slight hint of evening stubble shocking him at first, making him still his movement for a second, before he dares to continue, tracing Marc's jawline with a finger now. All the while, he looks for Marc's reactions in the younger rider's eyes and face and he is pleased that there is no discomfort, no shock, only a mixture of surprise and disbelief. Encouraged by this, carried away by the sudden unbearable longing in his veins, Dani tilts his head up and wraps a hand around Marc's neck, pulling him down into a kiss.  
Marc's lips are as soft as he remembers them and he tastes wonderful, like toothpaste and bit of salt, not even a hint of wine tonight, when their lips part and Dani's tongue slides to discover new territory. Tentatively, he steps closer and in response, Marc closes the gap between them completely, wrapping his arms around Dani's waist, his hands sliding into the back pockets of Dani's jeans and resting on the smaller man's butt, the touch burning right through the denim, heating Dani's skin. The smaller rider moves his hands up now, his fingers running through Marc's soft, black streaks of hair, slightly scratching the scalp underneath and when he leans forward, pressing his bulge against Marc's body, they are both moaning softly into the kiss. Everything they are doing is gentle and slow tonight and if it wasn't for the hint of stubbly hair that rasps against his, Dani would not even notice he is with another man. It doesn't matter in this very moment at all, actually. All that he wants is to fade into Marc, dissolve into him, get lost in him. And in this very moment, he has no doubt that Marc feels the same way about him. 

_como si aquel instante_  
 _fuera a ser el primero_  
 _del reste de sus vidas_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _as if that moment_   
>  _could be the first_   
>  _of the rest of their lives_


	10. Despertar - Awakening

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to push this back a little further - but then it kind of happened: Changed rating!!

Marc leans into Dani's touch, losing himself to the moment. The feel of Dani's hands in his hair, Dani's lips on his, Dani's chest against his is overwhelming, exciting and teasing at the same time and if he wasn't still nervous about the older man's feelings, he would pin him down to the bed and devour him completely. So far however, he is not sure what Dani wants, if he really likes this or just does it out of curiosity or not to let Marc down. The taller rider doesn't want to think about this, but he cannot help it, even though the kiss is almost drowning him. Then, Dani's hands move down his body and slide under his shirt and when a tentative finger traces his spine, Marc lets out a desperate whimper while he shivers from head to toe. He doesn't dare to move now, just letting Dani explore, allowing Dani's fingers under his shirt to move and his lean fingers to draw lines and circles on his chest and back. It's turning Marc into a needy mess, eliciting unmanly whimpers from him that he would be ashamed of if this didn't feel so incredibly good. Marc's cock is twitching impatiently, painfully restrained in his tight jeans and pressing against Dani's stomach in a way that certainly let the smaller man know exactly what he is doing to Marc with this caresses. The young rider blushes at the realization but then Dani's finger brushes over his nipples and he is lost again, moaning helplessly into their still-ongoing, messy kiss. Marc is steadying himself against Dani, his hands still anchored in the small man's jeans, but by now, he wants to take his turn at discovering the other man's body and slowly, tentatively, opening his eyes and studying Dani's reactions, he moves his hands under the older rider's shirt, brushing over his sides and the hard muscles of his stomach. Dani groans beautifully and Marc sees him squeeze his eyes shot. When Marc's fingers carefully draw lines on his back, scratching the delicate skin softly, Dani breaks their kiss with a gasp, Dani's head falling to his neck, giving Marc a perfect opportunity to kiss the smaller man's throat, his tongue flicking over Dani's skin. The older rider moans and his hands claw in Marc shoulders now, the nails digging so harshly that it's actually starting to hurt.  
Against his thighs, Marc feels Dani's bulge grow, making him grin into the kisses he is planting on the smaller man's neck, pleased with himself for getting the other man to this point. Feeling more daring now, the younger rider pulls away and takes off his shirt, Dani's eyes flying open and now staring at his chest, his eyes definitely flooded with desire, pupils dilated and eyes completely black. Marc loves the sight, but he would love it even more, if Dani's shirt would be off as well, so he tries tugging at the hem and cannot help beaming when Dani nods and helps him get rid of the piece of clothing. Marc inhales sharply at the sight in front of him, Dani's chest broader, his muscles bigger than he had expected. Dani blushes under his eyes, which Marc finds totally adorable. Still in disbelief about the perfection of the body in front of him, Marc closes the gap between them again, their chests pressed against each other hot smooth skin on hot smooth skin now. And when he locks gazes with Dani now, Dani's eyes are clearly craving, the sight giving Marc the courage to press his lips back on the other man's, the kiss rougher, more desperate now. His own arousal is still painful, growing by the second and he can feel Dani's excitement grow as well, can hear the smaller rider moan helplessly into their kiss when Marc's fingers gently brush over the smaller man's spine, tracing every single vertebra on his way. He starts biting Dani's lip now, the taste of blood lingering in their kiss and he bucks his hips forward, desperate for some frictions. Dani seems to like it, responding by jerking back against Marc and still releasing beautiful moans that mix with the sound of Marc's whimpers and their wet kiss.  
Marc's craving has reached his limits, Dani might even have pushed him over the edge already, all the young rider is thinking about being more now. More Dani, ever so much more is what he wants, what his body demands with growing urgency. Dani's hands have started moving on his back, sending countless shivers down his spine and making him whimper again. It's with a mix of bravado and despair, that he moves his fingers down, letting them rest right above Dani's waistband and, inhaling a sharp breath, slides them into Dani's pants. And that was a mistake, a big one. He knows it instantly, when Dani freezes under his touch, the smaller man's eyes flying open shell-shocked. Hurriedly, Marc draws his hands back, eyes on Dani who has lowered his gaze and is blushing now. _I rushed him. Shit._ Marc's hands fall at his sides with resignation. "I'm sorry," he whispers, his heart pounding nervously now and the arousal vanished within seconds. "I didn't want to-"  
Dani interrupts him, "No, don't. I am sorry, but I - I can't," Dani's voice sounds far away and very quiet now. "I don't know. I... well. I don't think I can do this."  
Marc stays frozen for a second, too shocked to fully grasp what's just happening, then he turns wordlessly, slipping into his shirt on his way towards the door. His head is hanging and his legs are trembling, his heart pounding relentlessly, the noise in his head unbearable and his eyes are fixed to the ground. There is a huge knot in his stomach, making him nauseous and he doesn't listen to the words Dani says behind him anymore. He leaves as if he was hypnotized, shutting the door behind himself on his way out and stumbling to his own room. There's still no clear thought on his mind when he flops to his own bed now, face first into the pillows and he really just wants to kick himself for pressuring Dani into something the older rider so obviously never wanted. 

_todo se olvida al despertar_   
_una vez más_   
_sólo puedo sonar_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _everything is forgotten at the awakening_   
>  _and one more time_   
>  _I can only dream_


	11. Malas Intenciones - Bad Intentions

_y, quisiera no pensar_  
 _más de un segundo en ti_

The entire mess has made Dani physically sick, left him throwing up in the toilet, cold sweat on his forehead and his entire body shuddering. He keeps telling himself that everything is just a big misunderstanding, that he never wanted Marc that way, that he is into girls only, that it means nothing. His line of argumentation is so weak, that he doesn't believe it himself for a second. Nevertheless, admitting that he likes another man? It seems impossible. And after all, what would they do after the kissing? Kissing a man, okay, at least it's not that different to kissing a woman. In the long run, they'll both not be happy in a relationship that doesn't get further than that though - so what would happen then? Could he really let Marc... _and even thinking it is making me swallow and blush..._ fuck him? It's not about pain, it's about vulnerability, offering himself up for someone and he cannot imagine himself doing that any time soon. As long as he cannot imagine them having sex, he doesn't think they'd have a chance of working out anyway. And then, he reminds himself, he is not into Marc. He's just confused because of a kiss that was nothing more than a bit of acting and that confusion will pass. He had hurt Marc though, a lot, it had been obvious in the way the young man left and that hadn't been his intention. It's weighing heavy on his heart, yet, at the same time he is sure that it's the same for Marc as for him, just a state of confusion. The feelings will settle if they return to their old ways and keep avoiding each other. Determined to do just that, Dani throws himself onto his bed only to realize that his mind is not complying with his intentions right now. Inside his head, there's a clear image of Marc, half-naked, shivering in front of him, the feel of the toned muscles and the soft skin palpable on Dani's fingers again. He could hardly deny his bodily reaction during that scene, neither could Marc. And right now, Dani's fingers are slipping into his own boxer's, wrapping around his cock, stroking himself firmly. He's soon panting, head thrown back, eyes squeezed shut, free hand clenched in the sheets - and still the image of Marc in front of his eyes, the sounds of Marc's needy whimpers and moans in his ear and Dani gasps and groans and comes with Marc's name on his lips. The afterglow is brief, before he's back in reality, realizing what he's done and he's heading right back to the bathroom, his stomach twisting yet again.

The race comes and for Marc, it's the next in an unprecedented row of successes, further confirming Dani's assumption that for the younger rider, their encounter was mostly a game, something Marc has gotten over quickly. For himself, the race is mediocre at best, his focus lost to thoughts of his teammate undressing for him. _If Honda knew what was going on in my head, would they fire me?_ It's not helping at all that the shoot has been published and that he's now stumbling on pictures of them kissing everywhere. Behind the scenes, they have returned to ignoring each other rather successfully and Dani has decided to ignore Vale right along, but he feels the piercing looks of steel blue eyes in his back anyway and later, before leaving for the airport, finds himself cornered by the Italian, who is frowning at him. "What have you done?"  
"Why?" Dani tries pretending oblivion.  
"Because Marc looks like a beat up puppy despite winning a race and you look..." Vale's eyes wander up and down on him briefly. "Well, to be honest, you look like shit."  
Dani swallows. "It's none of your business." And he turns to the side, ready to push past Valentino.  
Vale's hand reaches out to his shoulder and stops him for one more moment. "I don't know, what you did. And I don't know what it is you will decide that you want in the end. But I think you owe him an apology either way." And the Italian lets go of him.  
Dani walks away, in his head the images of Valentino wrapped around Nicky, fast asleep with his head on the American's chest, sees Nicky pressing a secretive goodbye kiss on Vale's neck, the Italian beaming instantly... _I want that. I really do. Somehow._

He returns to his empty house, his home, that usually feels like a sanctuary, a safe and quiet haven and that now is agonizingly empty and lonely, the lack of distraction driving him up the walls. He walks through his own living room like a tiger in a cage, he tosses and turns in his bed, he tries cold showers and hot baths, only to feel more and more restless and driven. The images of Marc are circling around him like ghosts haunting him. It's at some point Monday night where he surrenders, where for the first time, he admits to himself that this obsession is too much to fix itself and that he clearly wants Marc, whatever that may or may not imply about his sexuality. So he gets up and starts his car, heading towards a place that he's never been to before, a place he's heard a bit of, a place that seems like heaven and hell in one. He doesn't stop once on his way, his eyes focused on the road, his head on auto-pilot for the time being. Around him, the darkness fades into the grey light of the early morning and then the early rays of sun accompany him through the last part of his journey, before he stops in front of _the_ house, a house that he's heard about but never been to. Briefly, he wonders whether it's too early but then he decides that as all blinds and curtains are wide open, the inhabitants must be awake. His muscles ache from the long drive, his legs tremble with fear and his heart is thundering, but he makes his way to the front door and after a last deep breath, a shaky finger manages to ring the bell.  
The door opens to a glaring and frowning Alex, giving him a look that makes Dani's blood freeze. _He told him._ "What do you want?" The younger Marquez's voice is ice-cold.  
Dani notices the far away sounds of a piano, the lingering smell of coffee, the clean and tidy hallway behind Alex and he feels horribly displaced, rumpled, ruffled and his teeth not even brushed. "I have to apologize." It comes out as a bare whisper and he is not sure if Alex understood, but the young man steps aside and lets him pass. "Where is he?" Dani feels his cheeks heat up and stares to the ground.  
"Living room." Alex points to a door, eyes and voice still cold. "Don't you dare hurting him again."  
Dani shakes his head slowly, walking in the direction of Alex's finger. The sounds of the piano get louder and Dani opens the door to a sight he would never have expected, finding that the music does not come from a disc but rather from a real piano and the person playing it is nobody less than Marc Marquez. _And of course he's great at it._ The young rider hasn't noticed him, or at least he shows no sign of having heard him enter and Dani stay's frozen in the door frame. _I didn't even know he can play._ He stares at Marc's profile, surprised that he's not even looking up, marveling the focus of his eyes and the smooth movements of his fingers, the lanky figure almost swallowed by the light grey hoodie he's wearing. _He has beautiful hands._ There are probably many things he doesn't know about Marc, there is a hidden depth in the kid that flashes Dani right there and he really wishes they had used the last year and a half more wisely, talked more, learned more about each other. If it's not too late already, he would love to get to know the older Marquez better, would love to learn to read him like an open book, learn about his dreams, his thoughts, the way he's grown up, just soaking up everything about him. Dani's ears follow somewhat sad and really well played sounds of a song, which he is sure he has heard before and which is now slowly coming to an end. When the song is over, Marc's head lifts up and Dani meets his gaze, receiving from Marc a look full of surprise and shock and his heart shattering at the underlying accusation in the dark brown eyes. The older man smiles tentatively and takes a deep breath - _It might be late, but it just can't be too late._ \- "I am sorry."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _and I don't want to think_   
>  _about you for more than a second_


	12. Déjame Entrar - Let Me In

_He is sorry - for what? Not being interested or being interested and acting like a coward?_ Marc sits there, speechless, head tilted up towards Dani and the older rider's face is inscrutable for him. All he sees is that Dani is miserable and that's enough to stop him from being angry. That and the fact that Dani has apparently driven something like a thousand miles to apologize. Marc knows he should be saying something but his mind is strangely blank, the thoughts darting too restlessly between wanting to hug Dani and wanting to run away from the other. Helplessly, he stares up, hoping that the words will return to his brain. He is eternally grateful for having Alex, when his younger brother's head appears in the doorframe. "I'm making some coffee, do you guys want some too?"  
"Yes, sure," Marc presses out hastily, hoping for Dani to play along and the smaller man nods, still looking horribly insecure. _That's not right. I don't want him to be uncomfortable around me. Never wanted that._ They enter the kitchen and Marc gestures for Dani to take a seat, taking the place across the smaller man for himself. Alex, being the most wonderful brother he could wish for, considerately hands both of them a cup with coffee and then just leaves. "I'll be upstairs."  
An awkward silence and a palpable tension mount in the kitchen, making Marc stare into his mug with blushing cheeks. From the corner of his eyes, he sees Dani doing the same. And so they sit, the only noises coming from their breathing, an occasional cough or their drinking.  
"That song... what was it? I think I've heard it before." Dani's voice sounds shy, something Marc has rarely heard before. The younger rider's eyes stare at his own fingers now, wondering what Dani thought about that whole piano-thing. _Is this too girly for a rider?_ "Piazzolla." Marc knows he sounds harsh, it's involuntary though. He's just so overwhelmed from the situation, so nervous to find about Dani's intentions for coming here, that he seriously cannot find the words right now.  
After a moment of silence, Dani speaks again, his voice very soft. "You're good. I didn't know you played."  
"Thank you." _You're not here to discuss music, are you?_ Marc wills himself to look up, waiting for Dani to react and lock gaze with him. Piercing Dani's eyes, colour of delicious espresso right now, he starts, "I don't think you have to be sorry. I rushed and you're not interested. It wasn't fair to blame you and just walk away." Marc shrugs, seeing confusion and hesitancy in Dani's eyes.  
"I am not... I really don't know... I might be - interested?"  
Marc's jaw drops and his pulse starts racing immediately. He wishes he hasn't just misheard and he would love to pinch himself. "You're what?"  
Dani's eyes look down again now and Marc can see the older man blush beautifully. "I have never... I - This is hard, sorry." Marc fascinatedly watches Dani swallow hard, the small man's eyes still evading his. "I cannot forget that kiss. I liked it a lot. And I don't understand what that means. I really don't."  
 _More than I ever hoped I'd hear from you._ Marc stares at Dani and finally, takes a finger to push up the other man's chin softly, prompting him to look into his eyes. "I cannot forget either," he says quietly.  
"What should we do about it?" Dani is looking really helpless now and Marc has to suppress a smile at the cuteness.  
"I would-" Marc has to cough and swallow, and look back down because he's turning dark red now, "I already showed you what I want. But I don't think it's what you want."  
"Honestly, I don't know what I want. Except... I think I want to spend time with you. I... we wasted so much time and now I suddenly feel that I would like to know more about you." The words are pouring out of Dani's mouth now and Marc listens, shell-shocked by their potential meaning. "Sorry. This must sound horribly cheesy or stupid or both. It's just - I missed you when I was in Switzerland. But I don't know if-"  
"That's okay." Marc interrupts, his heart thundering incredibly fast now and his entire body frozen on the spot. "It doesn't matter. And it's not cheesy or stupid at all. We could... try, maybe?"  
"Try what?" Marc sees the frown on Dani's face and realizes how that sounded to the other.  
"I meant try to get to know each other," he hurries to say. "Can't hurt, right?"  
"Okay, yeah, I think we could try that." Dani tilts his head now, giving him a questioning look. "Now?"  
Marc finally manages to smile, nodding slowly. "Sure. You must have driven all night to get here, so kicking you out would be cruel. Want to go outside and just sit and talk for a while longer?"  
"Sounds great." For the first time since his arrival, Dani is smiling at him now, making rocks fall from Marc's chest. _He looks gorgeous when he smiles. Simply gorgeous. And I'd really love to kiss those lips but even if all I get today or forever is talking to him, like we just did, genuinely and as friends, then that would suffice to make me the happiest man in the world._ He can hardly admit it to himself, but it's all he's been wanting from Dani for the past year and he hates to acknowledge that it's been his own nervousness, his fearful avoidance of anything Dani, that stood in their way. _But now, I will work this out. Any bit of Dani I can get is better than avoiding him, that much I learned already._ Getting to know each other sounds tempting, because behind his careful mask of ignorance, being a part of Dani's life, understanding and decoding the man he fell in love with, that has been all Marc wanted for the past year and a half and he is definitely seizing the opportunity this time.

_Dejame entrar en toditas tus pasiones_  
 _  
Dejame entrar a tu alma, dejame entrar_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Let me in to all your passions_   
>  _Let me in to your soul, let me in_


	13. Me Sumerjo - I'm Sinking In

"So... piano, huh?" Dani is sitting next to Marc on the dry grass, the morning sun burning down on them relentlessly already and both of them looking over to the hills, evading each other's gaze. The smell of the dry grass, Marc and the pool next to them mixes in Dani's nose, Marc's scent making the hairs in Dani's neck come up.  
"Yeah." Marc picks at some grass absentmindedly. "Do you mind?"  
Dani is confused by the question, "Why would I mind?"  
"I don't know." The young rider shrugs. "Doesn't seem like a good hobby for a motorcycle rider."  
"Mhm. I see." _Worried about your bad boy image?_ Dani stares into the cloudless sky, wondering how he ever even ended up like this, in Spain, with Marc, who should - besides being a man - be way too young to interest him. But he is feeling comfortable right here, with _him_. "I think you're playing well. Never expected that, but you're really good. I should have figured though, you're probably good at everything you try." Dani says, maybe trying to provoke with the last part a little.  
"Nah," Marc smiles his usual broad grin and despite having seen it so often, it makes Dani's heart jump now all over sudden, "I suck at cooking. What about you?"  
Dani chuckles. "I'm a good cook."  
"That's awesome," Marc stretches his arms and then grins at him again. "I love eating so we're a great match then." Dani smiles back, the implication of that innocent phrase processing slowly in his mind. "Seriously though, Dani, what do you do when you're not on the bike? I have no clue - and that's kinda sad."  
"A bit of everything I suppose." Dani realizes that he doesn't have another serious obsession and envies Marc a little for his. "And I was serious about the cooking. I've become quite decent at it."  
"Prove it," Marc sounds challenging now.  
Dani grins widely. "Feel free to visit me and test my kitchen."  
"I will." It sounds almost like a threat.  
"Feel free. I mean it." _I think I really do._

"I liked kissing you," Dani declares after a bit of silence, proud that he is not blushing and that his voice is only slightly shaky.  
"I noticed."  
Dani sighs. Marc has no intention to make this any easier for him. "Then I freaked out."  
"Yeah, noticed that as well," Marc smiles wryly.  
"How can you stay so calm about it? Doesn't it bother you to... be with a man?" Dani asks, seriously intrigued.  
"I've been into guys for a while now," Marc says, sounding way too calm for the revelation he just made and Dani's jaw has possibly just dropped open.  
"Are you kidding me?" Dani huffs weakly.  
"Nope. Why does it freak you out? Do you have a problem with being with another man?"  
Dani nods. "Actually, yes, I do. Not because I think it's generally wrong. Just because I always thought it was wrong for me."  
"I don't think I understand." Marc's eyes are giving him a questioning look but the young rider doesn't seem angry or disappointed at Dani's cowardice and concern, only curious.  
Dani shrugs, feeling very tired right now. "Why would you? I don't even understand."  
There is a moment of silence between them before Dani yawns involuntarily.  
"You look tired, you must be dying after the drive." Marc sounds concerned now.  
 _I don't care, I like this. Please just keep talking. I love your voice._ He wishes he could say that out loud, but he cannot so Dani plays things down to keep Marc speaking, "I'm okay."  
"You drove here for me," Marc says distantly after a moment of silent, his voice suddenly full of disbelief.  
"Yes." It's true. Quite likely, it's been the single most stupid thing Dani has ever done for anybody. Silence falls on them again, but right now, being silent next to each other doesn't feel as bad and awkward as it did earlier. _The drive has been more than worth it already._ Then, Dani yawns again, unable to suppress it.  
"You do need to rest. What about I'll get you to my room and you take a nap? We could go out for lunch afterwards." Dani doesn't really want to do anything or go anywhere, he is not ready to waste a second of their precious time together by sleeping, but at the same time, the tiredness is taking over his last bit of resistance.  
He tries a weak attempt at stopping Marc. "Won't your parents mind another man in your bedroom?"  
"They're visiting friends for the week, they're not even close to Cervera. They won't know." _But they would mind if they knew?_  
Dani tries one last thing, "What about Alex?"  
"Seriously?" _Okay... that was a lame attempt._

Dani follows the young rider through the hallway, up the stairs and into a small and still child-like looking bedroom. It's neat and tidy just like every part of the house he's seen so far and his eyes rest on the dark wooden bed, a single bed, realizing just how young Marc really is. Then, his looks wander over the shelves, full of books and trophies. There's a picture of a really small boy on a mini dirtbike, neatly framed, next to the bed and it makes him chuckle. Meanwhile, Marc closes the window shutters, the room soon only lit by the dim table lamp next to his bed and asks, "You need anything?"  
 _You._ It takes all his will power to do this, all his courage, all his strength and Dani inhales sharply, crossing his fingers before he says it loud, "You!" In the vague light, he cannot actually see it, but he supposes, there is an expression of shock on Marc's face.  
"Are you kidding me?" The harsh reply follows promptly.  
"Maybe." Dani tries for a seductive voice while he slowly strips from his pants and socks and sheds his T-Shirt, but his voice is too unsteady, giving away the nervousness that's flooding his veins at the moment.  
"Seriously, Dani, you jumped when I-"  
"I know. That's not...," the incoherence is back and Dani is angry at himself for it, "I don't... just- If you want to, just join me." Dani lets himself fall to the bed unceremoniously. He can make out Mark's silhouette in the almost-darkness and sees him stand there for an instant, but then the younger rider peels from his clothes as well, only leaving on his boxers and Dani awes the outline of his body in the obscure light. Dani closes his eyes, trying to avoid a physical reaction to seeing his teammate half-naked, gloriously tanned, beautifully ruffled and just and only gorgeous.  
Next to him, he feels Marc climb into the bed, wriggling into place on his side, right next to Dani, close enough for the smaller man to feel his breath. Then, he feels one of Marc's fingers trace his jawline, the touch sending a shiver down his spine instantly. Suddenly, he hears Marc whisper, "Is it okay if I-" Dani doesn't let the younger man finish the sentence, instead, he rolls over to his side and just kisses him. It freaks him out to do it, seriously scaring him, but the moment their lips touch, it's perfectly alright. It stays a chaste and brief kiss though. _That's all I can deal with right now and I hope you understand._ In fact, the way Marc is looking at him, eyes full of affection, probably is proof enough that his teammate does not mind. Dani falls back on his back and while he shuffles to get comfortable, he feels Marc taking his hand, lacing their fingers between them. Dani squeezes Marc hand briefly, before they both drift away slowly. _This I could get used to._

 _y dame una caricia que me salve_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _and give me a caress that saves me_


	14. Te Puedo Acompanar - I Can Join You

Marc cannot believe it, he actually fell asleep like a stone, mid-morning and next to Dani Pedrosa. He figures that the nervous, sleepless, restless nights of the past weeks must have finally taken their toll and the presence of Dani, the knowledge that everything he craves is right next to him just kicked him over the edge. He listens to the steady breathing next to him, feels the heat of Dani's body and he would love to turn around and wrap himself around the other, but he also knows that he cannot rush Dani, not again. With a sigh, he lets his eyes wander to the digital alarm clock next to the bed. Its quarter to three... they've slept for more than four hours. No wonder he is starving then. Carefully, he starts poking Dani's sides with his finger, whispering for the older man to wake up. Dani is not easy to wake though and instead of getting up, the small man rolls to his side and wraps himself around Marc, who doesn't dare moving at all anymore. It feels incredibly good, Dani's face against his neck, Dani's breath on his skin, Dani's arms possessively around his chest - Marc never ever will move again, afraid that it would scare Dani away. His heart is thundering nervously in his chest and he has to focus to keep his breathing steady and to stop himself from reaching out and cuddle back - or more. Actually, his physical reaction towards this is incredibly strong and will become painful sooner or later. Not even the fantasy of the Espargaro-brothers making out with each other is helping now. Willing himself to breathe evenly he stays immobilized under Dani and waits, feeling caught right in the middle between heaven and hell. When he's just about to feel a bit more stable, he hears the buzzing of a fly and with his eyes widening, sees it land on Dani's nose. He holds his breath while he watches Dani stir, eyes still closed at first and Marc sees the older man's eyelids opening slowly, sees him blink a couple of times and, even in the almost-complete darkness, he can see Dani's expression full of shock and surprise. _At least, he is not jumping up and running away._ Instead, Dani sits up slowly and turns on the table lamp again, his eyes still full of disbelief when he looks at Marc now, who is sitting up as well. "Hi there," Dani whispers and it sounds so insecure, Marc just wants to squeeze him.  
"Hey! We've slept really long!" Marc grins, propping himself up with his hands behind his back and praying that Dani won't look down to his lap.  
"Yeah... sorry, I was really drained."  
"Don't worry, so was I. It's not like I stayed awake any longer than you did." Marc shrugs, still trying to get rid of the bulge in his boxers. "Do you still want to go out for lunch?"  
It's silent for a moment, Dani apparently thinking about his answer. The smaller man's eyes wander around the room, then rest on Marc's body and Marc sees him blush the exact moment when he notices and that makes the younger rider turn deep red instantly as well. "Erm... I don't know. I'm hungry, so yeah, lunch would be good." Dani stares away now.  
"Okay, that's good. I'm just going to use the bathroom real quick." Dani nods and Marc flees.  
In the bathroom, he splashes cold water on his face and releases the breath he feels he's been holding. _Hopefully that won't scare him away._ For an instant, he leans against the cool tiles, waiting for his heartbeat to return to its normal rate and then he steps out, finding Dani still on his bed, legs crossed now and looking through some magazine he had left next to the bed. When Marc enters, Dani looks up to him immediately, still slightly blushed and most adorably ruffled. "It's free, so your turn," Marc says, smiling broadly now with the relief that Dani is not running from him.  
"Great," the other man gets up and before entering the bath, throws him a shy look. "Could I borrow a fresh shirt?"  
"Sure," Marc opens a drawer. "Just pick whatever you like." He turns away to get back into his own clothes and from the corner of his eyes, notices Dani pick a plain red, reasonably tight V-Neck. _That's going to look tempting._

So it does and Marc finds his eyes glued to Dani when they're getting into his car, ready to drive into the city for some food. Now, he's been interested in Dani for quite some time but he had grown reasonably adjusted to ignoring the smaller man and ignoring his own feelings - but ever since that first, more or less forced, kiss, he's failing miserably. His desire is growing by the second, yet, at the same time he knows he would be happy with anything Dani puts on offer, as little as it may be. "You have to give me directions, I'm the new kid here," Dani reminds him while they're pulling out of the driveway. And when they approach the intersection and Marc's gaze passes the signs, he has a sudden idea that strikes like lightning. _It's too early and I can't really ask for that - can I?_ Contemplating and with his mind zoned out, he distantly orders Dani around, managing to take them to a small bar where Marc knows the owner and other guests will be discrete enough not to twitter pictures of them all over the internet. They enter the dark, somewhat smoky room, greeted with a nod from the few people inside and Marc goes first, leading them to a table hidden in the back.  
"What do you want to drink, just water?" Marc gives Dani a questioning look and gets a nod in return. "Good, I'll get us something."  
He returns with drinks and sandwiches within a minute.  
"That's quick!" Dani smiles at him and he could swear there's less nervousness and more affection in that look by now.  
Marc grins back. "Yes, I'm a frequent visitor here." He points to a wall with loads of Marquez-Memorabilia. "But Javier, the guy who runs it, he's awesome and really, really private."  
"Okay, that's good." Marc can hear the relief in Dani's voice and smiles again.  
"Try something, they're really good." They eat in silence, occasionally exchanging a nervous smile, a look of disbelief, a brief chuckle.  
"How much do I owe you?" Dani puts his empty glass away.  
"Nothing." Marc shrugs.  
Dani blushes. _Dammit. He's too cute when he does that._ "So, basically, you just took me out to our first date?"  
"Oh." _I guess I did?_ "Well, I think I did. Hope you liked it." Marc smiles nervously and gets up, leaving the bar followed by Dani. The light and burning heat outside hit them like a hammer and Marc slides down his sunglasses quickly.  
"Do you mind?" Dani holds up a packet of cigarettes. Marc shakes his head and sits down on the curb, Dani sliding down right next to him, almost close enough for their shoulders to touch. _You're getting closer, aren't you?_  
"But I'll have to discuss that with Vale. I don't think I appreciate that he got you hooked on those," Marc says, trying hard to keep a straight face. In return, Dani's elbow nudges his ribs. _One thing I have to admit though, you look drop dead beautiful with those._ Marc marvels Dani's face, the way his lips close around the cigarette to draw, the way his slim fingers hold it, the smooth movements he makes and the little grey lines of smoke that float away. _Dammit. He's really hot._ "Dani?"  
"Mhm."  
"Does your offer still stand?" Marc swallows, feeling like he is about to die from nervousness.  
"Which offer?" Dani's head turns around and he pushes up his sunglasses, two beautiful mocha-coloured eyes staring at Marc now.  
Marc pushes his own sunglasses up as well, blinking a couple of times. "To try your kitchen?" Marc's voice is trembling.  
"Now?" A range of emotions, confusion, shock, surprise, even pleasure, crosses the older rider's face and Marc nods slowly, his heart about to crash his ribcage. Dani ponders for a moment. "You want to come up to Switzerland with me _now_?" Marc wishes he could read Dani's face but it's inscrutable.  
His voice is shaky, when he replies, "Yes, actually I'd love to."

_Quiero andar_  
 _Y ser libre como el viento_  
 _Respirar_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _I want to go_   
>  _and be free as the wind_   
>  _Breathe_


	15. Avalancha - Avalanche

Dani swallows, his mind going on overload, torn between screaming _yes, what took you so long_ and _no, that's too soon, too wrong_. "What about your family?" He presses out, playing for time now.  
Marc shrugs and stares at the floor. _He's nervous about this._ "As I said, they're not even here." _Right. You mentioned that._ Dani rummages his mind for words.  
Then, he tries again. "Alex?"  
"Won't care." Marc sounds impatient now.  
Can they just leave Alex on his own though? Dani really isn't sure. "Don't you have to watch him?"  
"Watch Alex?" Marc snorts. "Don't let him hear that. He's grown up, he doesn't need a babysitter! And I would have left for Mugello on Thursday anyway and left him to himself." Marc looks up now, blinking nervously at first but then, holding Dani's gaze firmly. "If you'll have me, I'll come along."  
So, Dani has to make a decision. And it's driving him up the walls, his brain is shouting that he's making a mistake, but looking into Marc's gorgeous brown eyes he feels too far under the young rider's spell, feels that the man is simply irresistible right now. He draws in a deep breath and kicks away his cigarette, nodding briefly. "Okay. Let's do it."

"How long did you drive?" Marc slides into the passenger seat and buckles up. They'd picked up his stuff already and he'd briefly called his brother who hadn't been overly surprised as it seemed to Dani. _But then, the way he glared at me when he opened the door - I'm sure he knew all along._  
"I don't know. Maybe seven hours?" Dani starts the engine and drives off towards the main street.  
"Oh... I thought it's like a thousand miles." Marc sounds contemplative and Dani chuckles at the remark. _He's so incredibly young._  
"I live in Switzerland, not Poland. It's about 900 kilometres. We'll do fine. And if you're okay with it, we can take turns driving." And they'd had some sleep, the tour de force Dani had done that past night or morning really had been a more dangerous, thoughtless adventure than this.  
Marc is beaming at him now, he can see it from the corner of his eyes. "You'd let me drive your car?" The enthusiasm of a young boy who gets to drive his father's car for the first time is all over Marc's voice and it makes Dani smile fondly although the obvious age gap scares him a lot. _Adorable. But really, eight years is a chunk._ "Yeah. Actually I would," Dani says absentmindedly, focusing on the signs to pick the right highway. From the corner of his eyes, he sees Marc staring out of the window, looking like he's pondering on something as well. The silence in the car feels okay though, not overly tense. There's just nothing to be said right now. _And that's okay._

They've gone to chatting animatedly soon after, discussing everything from favourite movies to books and music. And they're not overly likely to go to the movies together anytime soon because apart from Star Wars they cannot agree on much. At least, they share a very similar taste in music. Marc has hooked his phone to the car's bluetooth and took care of supplying them with a neat mix of Spanish and English rock. Right now, they've fallen silent again and Dani feels comfortable with it, feels comfortable with Marc. Right here, right now, having him in the car no longer seems wrong. He's old enough after all, he's well-educated judging by his taste in books, he looks gorgeous - the only thing Dani could hold against him would be his gender - and that would be discrimination, wouldn't it? "Does Alex know?" The question pops back into his head out of nowhere and for once, he doesn't think before speaking.  
Marc turns his head and Dani feels the young man studying his face from the side. "Does Alex know what?"  
"About us?" Dani feels his cheeks heat up, outplayed by his own courage right now and nervous to the bones.  
"There's not that much to know about us, I suppose." There's a noticeably sting in Marc's voice that makes Dani's stomach twist and his hands clutch to the steering wheel a bit tighter. "But yeah," Marc lets out a deep breath. "He knows that we kissed, more than once, and that I liked it."  
"I liked it, too." Dani gulps.  
Marc chuckles now and Dani is relieved that the tension that had been beginning to mount is dissolving rapidly. "I know. It would have been hard to miss."  
"Yeah... some things are hard...," Dani says, remembering the little incident this morning, his cheeks probably deep red now and then they both burst into laughter. 

They have to stop for gas eventually and change seats, Marc driving for a couple of hours before changing back when it's only a few miles left so that Dani wouldn't have to explain the way. With every kilometre they're making now, Dani feels his pulse race a bit faster and the nervousness in his veins rises by the second. _I am actually taking him home with me. What do I do if he's not only coming for food? He's most certainly not just coming for the food. Do I have to lay back and think of Spain?_ He shudders involuntarily. In fact, he feels no more prepared to take that step than he did last week. "Are you okay?" Marc obviously noticed and is now poking his ribs with a finger.  
"Sure." Dani suppresses another gulp.  
"You look kind of white around your nose. So, let me try again... are you okay?" Dani turns his head to the side briefly, only to find Marc frowning.  
"Sorry. I was just-" He cannot say it, his mouth refuses to form the words.  
"In case the problem is what I suspect it is... that won't happen. Not unless you're begging for it," Marc says softly, the slender hand quickly squeezing Dani's knee, a touch that sends a shiver down his spine.  
"Okay." Dani is slightly relieved. There's enough nervousness left though, because still he doesn't know what they'll do about them and because this feels like a damned date and it probably is and he is wondering whether his bachelor apartment looks remotely acceptable compared to the neat and tidy house Marc lives in. So, he's still pretty horrified when he pulls into his parking garage and takes Marc's bag out of the trunk, leading the young man to his place. "Make yourself at home then," Dani says while he holds the door open and Marc passes him, slowly, looking a bit intimidated. _Out of your comfort zone then?_ Dani shows him around and Marc follows him around, occasionally noticing something, pointing to things he likes, some photos he finds nice, the kitchen he finds great - and it really is, Dani thinks, because it's one of his favourite rooms. They head upstairs and with each step, Dani feels more nervous. He briefly considers the spare room, dismissing the thought quickly though as they've shared a single bed in the morning and it would be ridiculous to not even share the room now. "And that's the bedroom." His voice trembles and he feels himself blush when he opens the door. And when Marc brushes past him, he doesn't fail to notice that the younger man's cheeks are pink as well.  
"Nice, really. And you have a balcony!" And his voice trembles, too. Dani smiles and steps out on the balcony, making a gesture to invite the younger rider along.  
It's really late and completely dark outside. The cold air makes Dani shiver while he lights himself another cigarette. Marc is leaning over the railing, looking over the lights of the neighbouring houses. "I can't believe you're here," Dani says after a while, staring at Marc with awe.  
"Neither can I." Marc turns around and comes to sit down right next to him, mirroring the situation Dani and Vale had been in such a short time ago. Dani takes a deep breath and then reaches for Marc's hand, lacing their fingers.  
"I don't know what's happening to me. I really don't. But I - I care about you a lot. You should know that. I don't want to hurt you. I just - I'm so overwhelmed with this right now." Dani lets his head drop to Marc's shoulder and he feels the taller man tentatively wrapping an arm around him. Dani relaxes into Marc's touch, drinking in his warmth and his scent and noticing that the younger rider presses him closer now.  
"It's okay," Marc whispers after a while. "Just let me know what you need me to do." They sit in silence, flush against each other and it feels so good, so peaceful, so much like being home, it's washing over Dani like a giant wave of comfort. Marc has taken over his life like an avalanche these past days or maybe weeks and while it's often horrifying him, it's also become exciting and something he wouldn't want to miss anymore.  
After a while, Dani has long stubbed the cigarette and they're both shivering, Marc stirs next to him. "I'm sorry, but I think I really need to sleep. It's been a long day."  
"Yes, sure. Don't be sorry! I'd better get some rest, too." Dani gets to his feet, stretching the muscles of his legs and pulling Marc up.  
While he steps back inside, Marc mumbles, "I think I need a shower first."  
"No problem. Let me get you a towel." Dani hands Marc everything the other will need and then faces his bed. _Shirt or no shirt? Probably no shirt. But boxers. Yes, definitely boxers._ He undresses to his underwear and crawls under the sheets, listening to the sound of water splashing in the shower, then the sounds stop. Marc enters soon after, in boxers only and with damp, dishevelled hair, smelling like Dani's shampoo and toothpaste when he climbs into the bed next to him. "I'll go real quick... will you still be up when I come back?" Dani hears the despair in his own voice that's screaming _please stay awake and wait for me_.  
Marc gives him a broad smile. "Sure. I'll have a look at my phone, check whether Alex is okay."

Dani hurries under the shower, brushes his teeth eagerly. He's incredibly nervous and in the mirror, he realizes that he's flushed almost head to toe, but he also really wants to be back in that bed, next to Marc. He feels strangely self-conscious, wondering about Marc's experience, if the young man has been with a man and what type of man and whether or not Dani can live up to it. His legs are trembling a little when he walks back into the bedroom and even more so once Marc tosses is phone and stares at him openly. _I think I haven't even been this nervous before my first time. What are you doing to me Marc Marquez?_ Dani crawls under the sheets, propping himself up on his side to face Marc. And then, the confidence falls from Marc's face, the young man suddenly looking just as nervous as Dani feels. Strangely, it makes Dani a bit more relaxed and the smaller man reaches out to cup the other man's face now, pulling in him for another chaste kiss. "I'm glad you're here."  
Marc's face lights up. "Me too." And Dani rolls to his other side, shuffling to cuddle his back against Marc's chest and stomach, the taller rider's arm reaching out to pull him even closer. "Goodnight," Marc whispers against his hair.  
Dani turns off the light and relaxes into Marc's touch, his body reacting surprisingly quick. "Goodnight." Against his back, he can feel that Marc is not only comfortable with the situation and the way the other is beginning to wriggle now tells him that Marc would rather not have him notice. Biting his lower lip, he takes Marc's hand and slides it into his lap, leading to a surprised hum behind him. _I can't believe I did that. But I love you. And I can't believe I just thought that._

_aún nos quedan cosas por hacer_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _there are still things left to do for us_


	16. Culpable - Guilty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the incredible feedback on this!! I've been grinning stupidly for days because it's making me so happy ♥ ♥ ♥
> 
> ...and the rating changed!

To say that Marc is shocked right now would be an understatement. He is completely paralyzed, holding his breath and his heart thundering in his chest. So he is in a bed with Dani Pedrosa, his body pressed against Dani's, his cock rock-hard against Dani's butt and his fingers on Dani's building erection, held down by the small rider himself, obviously trying to tell him he is not the only one holding a stake in this. Marc's thoughts are spinning helplessly as he has no idea what is expected from him here and that's a complete novelty. All of his previous sexual experiences had been decidedly aimed at just that, sex. Quick, rough, dirty. _This_ is nothing like that, this is _Dani_ , who most certainly has never been this close to another man in his entire life. Marc swallows audibly and feels Dani squeeze his hand in return. _Is this your way of telling me to do something?_ Slowly, Marc releases the breath he has been holding and then gently tries rubbing his fingers over Dani's bulge, biting down on his lip to suppress a greedy moan. Dani in turn, does moan, very quietly but still audibly and it's a beautiful and at the same time teasing sound, sending countless shivers down Marc's spine and making his guts heat up. _Okay, he is not jumping this time._ Marc leans even closer now, nuzzling his head into the nape of Dani's neck and planting small kisses and licks on Dani's smooth skin, then sucking it, tentatively at first and when the other man presses his hand down even tighter, he leaves a defined bruise and bites down carefully, making the small man moan again. All throughout, Marc's fingers are drawing little lines on top of Dani's boxers and he is not missing out on the physical reaction of his movement, Dani growing harder by the second and Dani's breathing shallow and unsteady now. Marc's own desire has reached a painful state but he is determined not to give in, waiting for Dani to show him where the lines are this time. Keeping up his self-restraint is a true ordeal, but he prays that it will be worth it in the end.  
He lets his tongue move to Dani's ear now, then gently bites on his earlobe and he seems to have hit a sensitive spot, because Dani releases a low groan at the sensation and then shoves Marc's hand into his boxers with a somewhat erratic, desperate move. It's Marc's turn to moan softly this time, his fingers circling Dani's cock firmly, moving around carefully, exploring new territory. Marc is listening closely for the reactions to his moves, taking note of what works and how, completely focused on the man in front of him. His thumb smears some precome around Dani's tip, his lips sucking softly on Dani's shoulder and Dani grips his wrist tightly now, painfully tight actually, a low moan released at the same time, followed by panting and a growl, "Marc, please." Hearing his name from Dani's mouth, like that, desperate, low, with urgency, it's all the encouragement Marc needs to prop himself up now and roll Dani on his back, the smaller man under him now and Marc half on top of him, half next to him, shoving down Dani's boxer, relieved when the smaller man still doesn't jump. Instead, he's helping him with one hand and wriggling around, until the disturbing piece is gone. Marc leans down for a kiss. It's not chaste this time, Dani's lips parting the second Marc's hit his mouth. Marc devours him, desperate to taste him, all the while his hand is pleasing Dani's cock, stroking it firmly now and making the older man gasp helpless into their wet kiss. For Marc, who is still doing his best to ignore his own burning desire, it's bliss and torture at the same time. He breaks their kiss, wanting to give Dani some air and his eyes wander over the man unravelling underneath him, hands clutched in fistful of sheets, chest heaving quickly, eyes squeezed shut, damp hair disheveled and a sheen of sweat covering the smooth skin. It's a sight beyond beauty, beyond gorgeous, it's simply perfection. Marc uses his free hand to caress Dani's face now, carefully pushing some short dark streaks out of his face, then ruffling his hair, scratching his scalp tenderly. Searching for some friction, he presses his bulge again Dani's hips. Alternating between devouring Dani with kisses and watching him come undone, Marc's fingers do their work, almost on automatic mode as he is experienced enough and good enough at observing the small man's signals to figure out just what he needs to do. Dani's panting gets more desperate by the second and soon he is bucking his hips, thrusting into Marc's hand vigorously and then Marc feels Dani's entire body tense up under him, before he comes over his fingers and their stomachs, with a low growl of Marc's name on his lips. Gasping now as well, Marc strokes Dani through his orgasm, waiting for the smaller body to stop shuddering and then shoves his own boxers down, releasing himself with only a few quick strokes, ready to collapse on top of Dani, drained and zoned out, panting heavily and incapable of coherent thinking. 

They end up both splayed out on their backs, hands laced between them and the room filled with the sounds of their panting. Marc's mind is slowly returning to reality, wondering how it feels for Dani right now. His thoughts travel back to his own first experiences with a man, after that 2011 season that almost ended everything. _He_ had a little bit in common with Dani, same kind of hair, dark eyes, but taller, Marc's height actually and more open than Dani, obviously, as he'd taken the initiative, comforting Marc at first and then slowly moving them into new territory. At the time, _he_ 'd been the best thing Marc could have wished for, their encounters carrying him through the hell he'd been crossing after his crash and his injury. And he'd been reasonably gentle, understanding as a lover, giving Marc the time he needed to settle with the newly discovered part of his sexuality. They'd still lost their bond over the season, both preoccupied with racing, both aware that whatever glued them together over the winter had vanished and at the end of 2012, they were both world champion, both happy and somewhat close friends, looking forward to battle on track during the upcoming season. _Actually, we're still on friendly terms - however hard the media tries to write that away._ He wonders if he had done as good of a job at carrying Dani through this experience and squeezes the smaller man's hand, before reaching over to the nightstand for some tissues, cleaning both of them, Dani whimpering softly under his touch. Marc tosses the dirty tissues and coughs. "Are you okay?"  
Dani stirs and sits up against the headboard, Marc following his lead and their gazes lock. _He doesn't look scared at all. He looks happy, actually. And fond._ Marc's heart jumps with joy. "Not just okay." Dani is smiling at him - and Marc is quite sure it's really a fond smile. Then, the older man pulls him in for another kiss, gentle and slow, Dani's arms tightly around his neck. Marc is melting under the touch, flooded with happiness, suddenly sure that he's reached a turning point, a good one, here tonight. Their mouths still against each other, they slide down, both lying on their sides, facing each other, lips locked, arms tangled, eyes shut. There's no need for talking anymore and Marc is sure they'll both fall asleep like stones soon. Breaking their kiss for some air he opens his eyes briefly, catching a look full of affection from Dani that makes him feel fuzzy inside and a broad smile spreads over his face. _You didn't jump. And I hope you won't regret. Now let's just hope this isn't only one of my dreams._

_no hay experiencias vetadas_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _there are no forbidden experiences_
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> We all know who _he_ is, I suppose. ~~He'll be added to the tags soon.~~ And this has been excruciatingly slow to write, so I'm hoping it works for reading. Can't judge though, I cannot possibly re-read this any time soon. And yeah, not quite the kitchen - yet ;)


	17. Te Quiero Y Te Temo - I Love You And I Fear You

Dani wakes up first, the sun already up, too much light to go back to sleep and his head on Marc's chest, Marc's arms protectively wrapped around his back. _Wow, I can't believe we managed to sleep like this. So uncomfortable._ Most of his muscles ache but the memories of last night make up for it, putting a huge grin on Dani's face. _So I kind of had sex with a man. And I liked it. And nothing changed - right?_ I surprises himself that he is suddenly cool about it, no longer sick at the mere thought. But then, he's not been with just a man, he's with Marc and Marc is special. Also, Dani's fingers trace a line over Marc's firm stomach, Marc is really, really hot. He's just about to move his finger lower, curios to feel _it_ , when a hand suddenly gets hold of his wrist. His eyes jerk up to meet Marc's who is fully awake and smiling broadly. "What are you up to?"  
Dani feels himself blush, but Marc just keeps smiling and pulls his face up into a kiss. _This is great and we haven't even brushed our teeth. I never had this with anyone before._ "Seriously, before you explore what you were going to, you have to let me use the bathroom." Marc is holding him propped up above his face, still grinning that beautiful, irresistible Marquez-smile and Dani chuckles and scoops to the side. "Don't move, I'll be back for more." Marc walks away and Dani's eyes shamelessly rest on the beautiful back and butt that are leaving his bedroom. _And I think I only blushed a little._  
Dani sits up against the headboard and looks down his own body in disbelief, shaking his head with an insecure chuckle. He cannot fully grasp what Marc has done to him or with him, how he ended up head over heels with the kid, but right now, it feels so good. The nauseous feeling in his stomach seized, replaced by tender butterflies and everything just looking that tiny bit brighter, because he loves and he feels loved. Marc has a way of looking at him sometimes, with so much trust, so much admiration and so much affection, it's overwhelming and flooding him with joy. _I think you are the first person to ever look at me like that._ He hears steps approaching and lifts his head, looking at Marc with a broad smile now, waiting eagerly for the other to climb back into the bed. Marc crawls over him, straddling his legs and their faces are so close that their noses and foreheads are touching now. Dani almost slips the words, his feelings overpowering him right now but Marc closes the last bit of gap between them, his lips on Dani's, his tongue exploring Dani's mouth already and Dani is just dissolving, entirely consumed by Marc's caresses. They are both hard again, already. Not that it's surprising for Marc, who is still really young, but Dani would have thought he had outgrown that stage where everything got him thinking about sex right again. Marc's finger scratches a line down his spine now and he's moaning into their kiss. _I have no idea what I'm doing but this time i am reciprocating._ With determination, Dani grabs Marc's arms and, profiting from the effect of surprise, rolls him around to press his back right into the mattress, propping himself up over him with an insecure grin. "My turn," he presses out breathlessly and Marc's expression changes from surprise to desire within a second, his pupils dilating and his lips parting in anticipation. Dani really wants to take his time, wants to do this well, no, not just well, perfectly. His eyes focused on Marc's face, his fingers brush over the young man's ribs, the lanky body shivering under his touch. He has never touched another man's cock but when his fingers wander down Marc's stomach, a soft whimper coming from Marc's mouth at the sensation, he figures that it cannot be too different from his own, that from a common sense perspective, the things he'd do to himself should also feel pleasant for Marc. He decides to tease for a bit longer, stopping his hand right before he's actually touching, instead, taking his other hand to draw a line from Marc's knee over the inside of his thighs. "Dani. Shit." The low growl makes him chuckle. _I'm doing something right here._ Then he's stroking Marc's cock, working him the way he'd like it and staring at Marc's face with fascination, revelling in the needy noises pouring out of Marc's mouth and awing the way his head is tossing on the pillow, his cheeks flushed, hair ruffled. He looks gorgeous when he's unravelling like this and Dani cannot resist, leaning down to lick Marc's throat. "Da-ni." One of Marc's hands clenches in his hair, painfully tight, but it doesn't matter because the way Marc is moaning his name is almost pushing him over the edge, making him groan against the smooth skin of Marc's throat. The younger man shoves him around now, getting him on top and wriggles until their cocks are next to each other, Marc's hand closing around his and around both of them now and Dani lets out a desperate moan at the feeling, his mind going blank with desire and lust. There is only Marc's smell, Marc's touch, the sounds of their desperate moaning and panting and the feeling of Marc's cock against his and Dani can feel his climax build up inside him, constantly growing pressure and tension, the agonizing craving for release and then he feels Marc come first, hot liquid running over his fingers and he hears him call or rather growl his name, feels his body shudder under him and he blinks to the sight of his dishevelled face, completly off-guard and gorgeously unravelled and it's pushing Dani over the edge violently, his orgasm feeling like an explosion of colours. He's moaning Marc's name, begging for more, gasping for air, before he collapses on top of the young rider, floating on an unprecedented wave of happiness and complete satisfaction. 

Their breathing steadies bit by bit, but neither of them shows any signs of wanting to move, not bothered by the sticky mess between them and Marc seemingly unimpress by Dani's weight on his chest. After a while, still reluctant to return to clear thinking, Dani feels Marc's hand, gently playing with his hair and it's the sweetness of the gesture that makes him shiver from head to toe, releasing a soft and content sigh. He reaches for Marc's free hand, clasping it and stroking over his pulse with a thumb. "That was perfect," Marc's voice whispers against his forehead and Dani tilts his head up, awing the affectionate mocha-eyes that are looking up to him.  
"Unbelievably so." Dani leans down, kissing Marc passionately. _I am losing myself a little more each time we do this. And it's not even scaring me anymore._

_Te tengo y te quemo_  
 _Te vivo y te siento_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _I have you and I burn you_   
>  _I live you and I feel you_


	18. Me Enamora - I'm Falling In Love

"So, what are we doing today?" Marc reluctantly disentangles from Dani and sits up, stretching his arms above his head, Dani doing the same next to him. The older man smiles at him ever so fondly. He's been doing it all morning and Marc is overjoyed about it.  
"Maybe," Dani looks down on both of their laps, "we should start with a shower and then breakfast? Do you want to go first?"  
"I'd love to ask you to join me but then I don't think I'd ever get something to eat," Marc smirks and then nods. "So yeah, I'll go." Under the cool stream of water, he stills smiles broadly, happy and content with the way this has worked out, a bit of disbelief left at Dani's sudden interest. But then, maybe it hasn't been that sudden in the end. It doesn't matter much now anyway, all that counts is that they're getting there. And last night and this morning have both been amazing, the memory alone making him shiver. He steps out of the shower goes to get dressed, exchanging a brief peck with Dani who is ready to go next and it feels all natural. _A couple of days ago it's been unthinkable for you... fast learner, I guess._ Marc shakes his head and grabs his phone, sending Alex a quick text with an update. His younger brother doesn't bother writing much in return, all that Marc reads once his phone buzzes is a single word, "Strike." It makes him grin and then blush, because Dani comes back from the bathroom.  
"What's up with that?" Dani points to the quickly tossed phone and chuckles.  
"Just told Alex." Marc cringes, not sure how that will go down but Dani only grins back.  
"I hope he approves of your choices," the smaller rider says with a dirty smirk, pulling on a fresh white T-Shirt and black boxer briefs. Marc absentmindedly licks his lips at the sight, before he notices Dani blush.  
"So, breakfast?" He blurts out quickly, feeling his own cheeks heat up as well.  


Naturally, there's not much food in Dani's kitchen and they agree on cereal and shopping later, sitting opposite each other with their bowls in silence for a while. "How do you think Honda would react when we'd get to Mugello together?" Dani is giving him a questioning look.  
Marc ponders for a moment and shrugs. "Don't know? Irritated?"  
"Probably. They wouldn't imagine this though, would they?" Dani smiles nervously now. _Oh. You're afraid it will show._  
The younger rider shakes his head. "Nah, I don't think so. It'll be okay. We can always not sit together on the plane and pretend it's a coincidence."  
"Yeah, sounds like a possibility. They might not even notice we were on the same plane if we fiddle around a bit." Dani looks up and gives him a very dirty smirk now. "And then we secretly sneak into each other's hotel room at night?"  
"Oh really, we do?" Marc suppresses a chuckle. _I got you hooked quickly, huh? Glad we have to go to the same sponsor events then._  
Dani shrugs, blushing slightly. "Not if you don't want to."  
"Aww," Marc chuckles now, "I was just teasing you. Of course we will."  
They finish in silence and then head towards the terrace with fresh coffee. It's a beautiful sunny day, the air already rather warm _\- we did get up only at ten though -_ and they share a recliner, Dani leaning against Marc's back, lighting himself a cigarette. _I would actually mind if you didn't look so damned hot with these._ Marc absentmindedly draws lines on Dani's forearm, his eyes shut and his mind zoning out.  
"Marc, who taught you all that stuff?" Dani's soft but determined voice pulls him out of his peaceful rest.  
"Taught me what?" He rubs his eyes and looks at Dani, who is turning around to straddle him now, cigarette still in hand.  
"Well," two beautiful drops of mocha are piercing him relentlessly, "you weren't new to what we did, right?"  
 _Oh. Shit._ Marc can feel his entire body heating up, can feel the blush creep onto his cheeks. He lowers his gaze and bites his lip, unsure how to deal with this. In the end, he decides on quick and direct, hoping it will just be like tearing off a band aid, hurting slightly but only very, very briefly. "Jorge." He swallows and sees Dani's expression flicker between shock and disbelief.  
"Jorge is gay? And when? Why didn't anyone notice?" Dani gasps slightly.  
Marc smiles wryly. "You didn't notice about Vale and Nicky, did you? And it wasn't really that serious, not like a boyfriend thing. It started in 2011, after my big crash. He was there, and he caught me and I'm really grateful, until today, for what he did for me then. And it slowly turned into something physical but then the next season started and it just kind of stopped. We're still friends, or maybe more like buddies though. No harsh feelings, if you were afraid of that." He sees Dani nod. "Don't worry. And he's not gay, I'd say bisexual if I had to label it. Right now, he's seeing a woman." Marc inhales deeply, hoping Dani will be okay with it. The smaller man is stubbing his cigarette carelessly to the floor and then tilts his head, looking up to Marc with a questioning look.  
"So, am I your boyfriend now?" _So glad this is the most important thing you picked up from that._  
Marc beams at Dani. "Well, that depends."  
"On what?" Dani is frowning.  
"Do you want to be my boyfriend?" Marc cups the other man's face, locking their gazes, losing himself in a sea of mocha.  
And Dani nods. "I'd love to." _Wow. That's more than I ever dared to hope for._

_Por el resto de mis días_  
 _Quiero ser tu compañía_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _For the rest of my days_   
>  _I want to be your companion_


	19. Tú y Yo - You and I

"So, what do you want to eat for dinner?" Dani pulls out of he driveway, briefly glancing sideways towards Marc. _He looks gorgeous - how did I miss that for more than a year?_  
"I don't know. I mean, you'll be cooking, so it should be your choice." The younger rider sounds adorably nervous. Dani wonders whether it's for the same reason that's making his heart pound right now. They're going to be in the eye of the public, grocery shopping and probably some people will recognize them and there'll be questions coming their way.  
"If we get caught, what do we say we're doing?" Dani thinks it's best to discuss this beforehand.  
"To be honest - I don't have a clue. We could just... I don't know." He sees Marc shrug a bit helplessly. "Just wait what the press makes of it? If anything? And then react and say it's a friendly meeting? Just me stopping by on the way to the sponsor night in Mugello?"  
"Sounds like a plan. I mean... people are visiting Valentino all the time, right?" They really are. And it usually doesn't catch anyone's attention particularly much. Maybe they're the only ones who are bothering and this looks like a perfectly normal friendship to anyone else?  
They drive in silence for a while before Dani continues, contemplatively, "Do you think we'll ever just come out and be done? Like a normal couple?" ****Marc chuckles softly. "We are a normal couple, Dani. But as for showing that to people. I don't know. Maybe we'll be ready at some point... but I don't think I'm quite that comfortable with it yet. Would you want to?" Dani tries to read the tone in Marc's voice, whether he is really just asking out of curiosity or if there's more to it, a first check at how serious he will be about them.  
"I cannot imagine doing that at the moment. Really not. But who knows, so many things have changed already, I couldn't imagine sharing a bed with you until rather recently." They're both grinning now, the tension dissolving yet again. _This will be a thing sooner or later, but I'm glad we're not going there today. _Dani glances sideways again, awing the smug face of the man next to him, craving to kiss that look from his face.__

Inside the supermarket, they almost hold hands and only pull away at the last second, both of them exchanging a look of shock and blushing when they realize it. _Now, that's going to be interesting... if we can't keep our hands off each other for ten minutes, we'll never make it through a race weekend without raising suspicions all over the place. I wonder how Vale and Nicky do that._ "What about we just have pasta and salad today and I'll cook something real for you when we have a bit longer of a break?"  
"You might not realize, but for me, that's about as real as it gets. I'm not expecting a gourmet meal, I'd rather have something that's actually make me full." Marc grins at him devilishly. "And I'll pick dessert." Dani cannot suppress a laugh at that and then proceeds to lead them through the aisles, quickly fishing for the necessities.  
"Wine?" They're almost done and Dani holds up a bottle of Shiraz. Marc nods, his eyes sparkling now and Dani is getting the impression, that the kid has a hidden agenda for the night. They chatter about this and that on the way back, carry the bags inside together and take them directly to the kitchen. "Are you hungry?" Dani checks the clock, it's mid-afternoon and Marc shakes his head.  
"Not really, it's so hot. Could we go to the pool first?" Dani approves of the idea and they spend a playful time in the water, Marc making him forget his own age, luring him into childish plays and pranks he hasn't been enjoying for years. Now, he's indulging in it, loving the way it makes Marc squeal and giggle and look so incredibly young, content and carefree.

They return inside when the air slowly starts to cool a little, the sun beginning to fade a bit. Cooking for someone, not being by himself, chatter in the kitchen and wine testing included, is pure bliss. Dani is surprised at himself that it really doesn't matter at all anymore that Marc is a man. It's no difference. Well, maybe one. He's never been with a woman whom he could talk to as easily, who shared almost all of his interests and who'd animatedly debate over advantages and disadvantages of Misano over Aragon while he's cutting vegetables. He stirs the sauce and turns around, facing Marc again who's sitting at the kitchen table, cheeks slightly red from the wine and the heat. The young man is looking up to him, chin propped up on his hand, lips dark red from the wine, eyes full of admiration and the feeling is overwhelming Dani in the most beautiful way, his heart jumping and a myriad of butterflies humming inside his stomach. He is wanted, maybe even needed. Not by anyone, but by Marc Marquez, the man who is winning everything, who could have everything and everybody and who instead of partying with a girl his age - or several - is sitting in Dani's kitchen with a glass of wine, smiling at him incessantly. _I must have done something right in my life to deserve this._ They have pretty much said all that there was to say for the day and they eat in silence, outside on the terrace, both in white T-Shirts and tight jeans, exchanging those quick looks of disbelief that they'd shared repeatedly over the past days. It amazes Dani that he is doing this to Marc, is actually making the usually over-confident kid somewhat nervous and intimidated. And everything about this evening, the humid heat, the sounds of crickets and frogs, the light of a gorgeous sunset, feels like it's there just for them, shouting at Dani that he's found perfection and can have it right in his hands, handed over on a silver plate. He feels a lump in his throat forming just because he's still so incredibly overjoyed. _I want this everyday. I have no idea how to do it but we must find a way, because now that I know this, I cannot miss it anymore._  
"Dessert?" Marc pushes his empty plate away and looks at him somewhat wistfully.  
"I don't think so, I'm pretty full." Dani takes the plates, getting up to carry them inside, Marc following right behind him, empty glasses in his hand.  
"Skipping dessert would be a shame though." He hears Marc's voice behind him, muffled by the door of the fridge and he's amazed at how natural this has become already, Marc in his kitchen, rummaging in the freezer. Shaking his head and chuckling at the younger man's eagerness for dessert, he clears their used dishes into the dishwasher. Behind him, Marc apparently found what he had been looking for as he hears the sound of the freezer being shut vigorously. "You know," Dani shivers at the sudden drop in octave in Marc's voice which is approaching him from behind. "Dessert is usually the best part of dinner." Dani almost squeals at the sensation of something ice cold against his neck and turns around swiftly, facing a seductively grinning Marc who is triumphantly holding up a small cup of ice cream. Hypnotized by the sudden change in atmosphere, the sexy tone in Marc's voice and the lust in the young rider's dilated pupils, Dani stays frozen to the spot, incapable of a coherent reply and fascinated by Marc's smooth movements when he opens the lid, dipping his finger inside and licking it clean, all the while holding Dani's gaze. And the older rider cannot help parting his lips slightly, holding his breath, staring with anticipation, while Marc does the same again and again, before he looks at him with the most evil smirk Dani has ever seen on him. "Want some?" The tone in Marc's voice is enough to make Dani tremble and he nods, slowly, steadying himself with his hands against the counter behind his back. Marc scoops some more ice cream to his finger and holds it out to Dani, who absentmindedly licks it clean, his mind focused on the brown eyes that are piercing him relentlessly and his blood rushing to his groin. Marc moans softly, closing his eyes and stepping closer, dropping the container in the sink. Dani pulls his hand away and watches Marc open his eyes again, holding his gaze. The younger rider smirks devilishly again, closing the gap between them completely, his bulge against Dani's and when he speaks again, his voice is very low with a dangerous undertone. "So... still no dessert for you?" 

_Tú y yo - vamos a llegar._   
_Tú y yo - juntos al final._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _You and I, we'll make it there_   
>  _you and I together until the end_


	20. Dame Tu Amor - Give Me Your Love

Dani's hands are clutching the edge of his kitchen counter desperately and Marc sees the trembling in the smaller man's arms, feels Dani's cock press against his own, both of them hard already. He's still waiting for Dani's response, their gazes locked, eyes clouded with lust. Then, he hears Dani's hoarse voice, feels the hot breath against his face, "I think it's your turn to pick dessert. So, show me the options." _Damned, he's learning quickly. Cheeky much._ There's a defined sting in Marc's guts, a shiver down his spine, a twitch in his lap and his hands tremble when they reach under Dani's shirt now, resting against the smooth skin of a toned stomach, feeling the shuddering in the other man's body. Biting his lower lip, trying desperately to focus and to restrain himself from bending Dani over the counter right here and now, he shoves up the older rider's shirt, shedding it quickly and Dani mirrors his move, Marc's shirt landing on the floor as well. It's naked skin on naked skin now, a sheen of sweat between them, both panting heavily, foreheads touching and each with his hands on the other's shoulders. It's an overwhelming a closeness, filled with a tension and anticipation that Marc has not felt with his previous partners. He's never taken the time for it, has never allowed desire and longing to build up this slowly.  
He waits until he cannot bear it any longer, before he leans forward for a kiss, Dani reciprocating eagerly and obscene sounds ensuing. The taste of blood lingers in their mouths, the mounting tension making both of them rough in their despair. Marc feels Dani's hands on his hips now, clenching tightly right above the waistband of his jeans. His own fingers move between their bodies, unbuckling their belts and unbuttoning their jeans. The clothing drops to the floor, followed by their underwear, both of them fidgeting with their legs to step out of it and kicking it across the kitchen floor. Their lips stay locked through it, both of them moaning into their kiss and Dani's nails digging into the flesh of Marc's hips forcefully enough to leave bruises. Marc has spread his legs just enough to compensate for the height difference, allowing their erections to be pressed directly against each other and Marc's fingers wrap around them, smearing a the mix of their precome against them and it's making Dani tremble so much under his touch that he has to push him against the counter with his upper body to steady both of them. Marc focuses on Dani's reactions, taking in every moan and every shiver, carefully assessing his next steps. _There is nothing more gorgeous than your face when you look at me like this, your eyes black, your cheeks flushed, every inch of you screaming for more._  
Marc makes up his mind, deciding to go all in rather now than later, the older rider's growling making him confident that Dani will be ready and he moves his hands to cup Dani's face, then pulling back and looking into his boyfriend's eyes. They're both gasping for air and it takes Marc a moment to start speaking, whispering straight into the other man's ear, "I want to feel you. I need you, Dani." And he studies the expressions on the other rider's face, fear and lust battling for the upper hand and rocks fall down when, despite the nervous flickering in Dani's eyes, he sees lust win.  
"How?" Dani is swallowing audibly and blushing beautifully.  
"Have you ever done this with a girl?" Marc's fingers gently push back some black streaks from Dani's forehead and trace his temples and jawline, feeling the other melt into the touch. With another audible gulp, Dani nods. "Okay, it's exactly the same."  
"We need-" Marc silences Dani with a gentle kiss, his hand reaching for a crumpled grocery bag that he secretly purchased when Dani had gone out of the supermarket for a cigarette. Feeling his own cheeks heat up as well, he presses a foil wrapper and a small tube in Dani's hand, that he has to gently remove from his hips. Dani pulls away from their kiss immediately, staring at him with disbelief and a tentative smile. "You planned this?"  
"Possibly." Marc plants a kiss on Dani's shoulder and looks back at the smaller man through his lashes. "Do you mind?"  
"Not. At. All." It's a low growl, followed by Dani's free hand clenching in his hair, pulling him in roughly for another kiss. _Fast learner._ Marc is moaning helplessly into the kiss, the anticipation of what's going to happen driving him insane and he feels like a needy pile of mess when Dani lets go of him, looking at him expectantly now.  
"Ready?" Marc asks breathlessly and when he sees Dani nod, moves to bend over Dani's counter. _Now that's me getting to know your kitchen._ He chuckles briefly at the thought only to be distracted by Dani pressing against him, planting kisses and licks on his shoulder blades and spine, his fingers stroking over Marc's cock. The sensations are overwhelming, almost unbearable. It's never been easy for him to let down his guards in this way, to allow himself to be so completely vulnerable and most literally open, but with Dani, it is different, just like everything is a little different with Dani. There is no nervousness, no fear, no shame, only desire and his cock is twitching impatiently under the other man's caresses, making him buck his hips involuntarily. Dani shuffles behind him now and the sudden feeling of cool liquid in his crease makes Marc shudder.  
"Sorry," a soft voice whispers against his neck and then it's all forgotten because a finger presses against his entrance tentatively. Marc bites down on his lip, the taste of blood returning and breathes through the sting, suppressing his whimpering because he doesn't want Dani to notice. And Dani is really gently with him, working him open excruciatingly slow, so that the first moment of pain soon fades out, only a slight burn left. When he's completely comfortable, he presses back into Dani's touch, trying to encourage the other to go ahead and it's amazing how quickly they've both learned to read each other's signals, because Dani reacts promptly, adding a second finger carefully. Dani's touch is so gentle that it's almost painful again and after a moment of adjustment, Marc's hips move against the small man again, wordlessly begging for more, while his head is sinking on to the counter now, holding it up becoming too much to deal with. The cool surface feels wonderful against his forehead and he releases a content moan when another slick finger finds a way past his clenching muscles. After a while, Dani pushes harder and when he, probably accidentally, manages to hit Marc's prostate, Marc surrenders, begging Dani to fuck him now, not even embarrassed at his own neediness anymore.  
Dani grants his wish, sliding into him just as gently as he's treated him all evening. It doesn't take long for Marc to get used to the feeling of Dani inside him and he is soon growling, "Please. Move." After a few very tentative thrusts, Dani pushes harder and Marc does his best to try to match the other rider's moves with his hips, soon both of them moving in perfect synch, the room filled with the noises of their moans and flesh hitting flesh. Dani has one hand wrapped around Marc's cock, expertly pushing him towards the edge and the other in Marc's hair, holding his head down possessively and the gesture is only adding to Marc's desire. In his guts, the familiar tension is building up again, reaching an almost agonizing pressure this time, before he comes over Dani's hand with an incoherent growl and he is on a wave of pleasure and pain when Dani keeps thrusting into him, making him wince and moan until he feels Dani come as well, a string of expletives pouring out of his mouth, some of the words Marc is sure neither of them could say without blushing normally. 

When they have made it through the afterglow and cleaned themselves up a little, they share that same recliner once again, still naked but cuddled under a blanket because the night has fallen down meanwhile, the air significantly cooler. Marc holds Dani in his lap, his arms around Dani's waist and his head on the older rider's shoulder. Marc's eyes wander around, the image of the black sky with thousands of little sparkly stars making him shiver. In his nose, the smell of Dani's hair and the cigarette smoke mingles into that unique mixture that's long saved in his brain as _most irresistibly Dani's_ and Marc knows he's given Dani all of him tonight without doubting his decision for as much as a second. The realization how easy this has been and how much that says about Dani's power over him hits him hard but right here, with an armful of Pedrosa in a beautiful summer night, he cannot bring himself to care. Instead, he would happily do it all again because he loves the feeling of belonging to Dani.  
"Marc?" _Oh... that sounds a little too insecure for my taste._  
"What's wrong?" He laces their hands on Dani's stomach, squeezing reassuringly.  
"Did I hurt you?" _Oh._ Marc takes the bottle of Shiraz from the floor for another gulp and as soon as he is finished, Dani takes it from him, their fingers brushing briefly and the touch sending another shiver through Marc's still oversensitive body.  
"No. It was perfect. I couldn't wish for more." He nuzzles his head against Dani's neck and he swears he can hear the rocks fall down the smaller man's chest.  
"I thought it would be the other way round." Dani's voice sounds distant now and Marc needs a moment to process the words, chuckling when he finally understands.  
"We'll get to that. At least I hope," he whispers, his hand caressing Dani's chest now. _Because I really do want all of you. For now though, that was perfection in every aspect. And in the end, parents are always right, because sex with someone you truly love is a completely different story._

_Tú eres mi fe_  
 _Tú tienes todo lo que quiero ser_  
 _Tú eres mi salvación_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _You are my faith_   
>  _You are everything I want to be_   
>  _You are my salvation_


	21. Rueda, Fortuna - Spin, Wheel Of Fortune

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about this being so short, it's really just an interlude to push the plot ahead a fair bit.

They talk for a little longer, right there under the starry sky, before they fall into the bed, limbs tangled and sound asleep the second their heads touch the pillows. The next day is travel day then and it makes both of them nervous, leaving their shelter where it was only them, time seemingly endless, for the hectic life at a sponsor event, a charity soccer game and a dinner something, surrounded by many pairs of eyes that watch their every step. In his car, in the airport's parking garage, they exchange a long and passionate kiss, both of them painfully aware that the next would have to wait until late in the evening. They had finally decided on travelling separately to Mugello, picking different flights and everything because although they'd have to have THAT discussion at some point, the point just wouldn't be today. And they had also made plans for after the weekend, inviting themselves to Vale's, who was suspicious about Dani's call at first but then audibly proud when he announced whom he'd bring along. Marc's parents were not exactly as amused at his decision not to return home for the few days between their obligations and Dani is not sure how he feels about the young rider hiding him from his family _that's an issue for much later though_ , but in the end, they understood that travelling from Mugello to Cervera and back to Misano was more stressful than a break at the Rossi estate.

Being around Marc without being able to touch him is an ordeal for Dani, it's making him grumpy and intolerable throughout their factory visits and autograph sessions. It's the occasional, well hidden glances of affection Marc throws at him that keep him going, that even manage to put a brief smile on his lips. In the end, his mood is okay though anyway, he has a not-so-media-friendly image anyway and he doesn't really care. The later it gets, the more he counting each and every second, waiting for the day to end, for the return to their hotel, for the secret way Marc's room, the secretly handed key card almost burning a hole into his jeans and the thought of what they could do making him blush. And then there'll be someone else asking him a question, dragging him out of his so much more pleasant daydreams and he'll again look absentminded and confused, earning another worried look from Alberto.  
It's late at night when he finally sneaks to Marc's hotel room, the door opening instantly after his knocking. He finds Marc on the phone, visibly pale and leaning against the wall and he overhears a conversation where the first few lines he hears Marc say catch his attention instantly, freezing him to the spot.

"She is what?"  
...  
"You are kidding me, right? Alex, please, this is not funny."  
...  
"Are you sure she's serious?" Dani raises an eyebrow, but Marc just shrugs at him apologetically. He looks devastated to say the least, one hand running through his hair desperately now.  
...  
"Don't yell at me. I didn't - ... ah, come on. What are you going to do about it?"  
...  
"What do you mean by too far?" It can't be _that_. It just can't. Not Alex, the baby Marquez. Dani tries throwing questioning looks at Marc but the young rider is in a helpless state of oblivion, still ruffling his hair and biting his lips. _I'd say it's cute if it didn't sound so bad._  
...  
"Please, tell me you are kidding me."  
...  
"And what do you want me to do about it? I can't come home before Sunday, we have stuff tomorrow and on Saturday." Dani cringes, they weren't going to go home. What was going on in Cervera that worried Marc so much?  
...  
"No you cannot hide at Dani's. We were going to Vale's. And I think you have to tell mom and dad."  
...  
"Kick you out? They'd never do that." _O-kay..._ Dani cringes and Marc looks at him with truly desperate eyes now, as if he was pleading with him to do something - onyl that he obviously can't.   
...  
"Her parents are idiots then. Well, you two can stay at our place and mom and dad will- " He cannot understand the exact words but Alex is definitely shouting into the phone loud enough for Dani to hear him.  
...  
"Okay..." Dani hears the surrender, Marc sighing with resignation. "You know what? Call Jorge and tell him what's wrong. Ask him if he can take you guys to Vale's and meet us there on Monday. You'll hide, we'll talk and then we all just go to Misano together and until then, everyone should have cooled down."   
...  
"Okay, Alex. She needs you now and I'll hang up." And it really seems to be just _that_.  
...  
"No, actually you don't have a say. You messed up, she needs you and you'll do your job. Don't forget to call Jorge!" With a softer voice, Marc adds, "I'll be there, okay? We'll work it out." Then, Dani sees him drop the phone carelessly and finally, the young rider stands there, steadying himself against the wall and looking at him in utter disbelief. "I'm going to be an uncle. In January." _Wow. That's soon._

_ya nada es como antes,_   
_o eso al menos quisiera..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _nothing is as it was,_   
>  _at least I wish it wasn't_


	22. Baila - Dance

The rest of their time in Mugello is hectic but Marc feels grateful for the distraction. He doesn't really want to think about Alex too much, the burden feeling too heavy for him to carry. Dani is supportive and Jorge has already agreed to take Alex and Marta to Vale's, inviting himself and Clara right along. Marc isn't sure how Dani feels about it, but so far, he hasn't objected. At least, he has company through it, the most beautiful company he could wish for, Dani sneaking into his hotel room and under his sheets every night, sneaking back out only in the early morning. They didn't have sex again, Dani not asking for it and Marc reluctant to push the other man towards anything, but they had other ways to keep each other entertained and for now, Marc was content. _Strange, before Dani, patience would never have been a virtue of mine, but for him I'd just wait forever if I had to. Probably because with Dani, I always KNOW it will be worth it in the end._ Nevertheless, everything would be so much easier if they wouldn't have to keep their romance a secret, but going public now seems unthinkable because then, hell would really break lose all around them and Marc knows Dani well enough, knows the small man's urgent need for privacy and respects it, so he would never forgive himself for dragging him right out into the spotlight like that. For Alex though, attention would come soon enough. With a sigh, Marc closes his bag, ready to sneak into the hotel's parking garage, where Dani and a rental car should be waiting for him.  
The car, carefully picked by his older boyfriend _\- yay, I love calling him that -_ had the kind of windows that no one could look through from the outside, making their way out easier once Marc had slipped into the passenger seat next to Dani. The smaller rider drives them out of the city, both of them secretly awing the other, relief all over their drained faces and they travel in silence, hands laced on the gear stick between them. They've reached the autostrada when Dani releases a silent cough and starts speaking, "So, how are you feeling about it?"  
Marc feels him squeeze his hand and smiles at the sweet gesture. "I don't really know. It's a bit sudden I guess? I don't think it's sinking in yet."  
"How is Alex coping?" Marc is surprised, grateful and genuinely happy that Dani cares, that Dani understands the bond between him and Alex.  
"Not well I think. But I don't blame him. It must feel like the end of the world. I'm glad he'll be there tomorrow, I don't feel good about him being by himself right now."  
"Isn't she with him?"  
"She is, but she's so devastated herself that she needs Alex to be the responsible one and you know, I really think he got her into the mess and has to help her out, but his broken voice when he calls me at night is still breaking my heart and I want him to have someone to lean on now as well."  
They fall silent for a while. "Can you imagine him with children?"  
"I can imagine him with children, yes, he's adorable with them - but that's usually as cousin or friend or whatever, not as dad. And seeing my little, crazy, playful brother as a father? It's not happening right now."  
And it's silent again, until Dani whispers the sentence that makes Marc's heart drop, "We'll never have... I mean... we can't... will it bother you?"  
 _Shit. I've been over that for a while - but for you that's new... it's a consequence of us you haven't considered yet, I suppose?_ Marc shakes his head slowly. "No, it doesn't." Marc swallows. _I am sure you would be perfect with children. What are we doing here?_ "What about you?" His pulse races while he waits for Dani's answer and he shivers involuntarily.  
"Honestly? I never really thought about it. I don't think I had any expectations. And then..." Dani stops mid-sentence, Marc looking over to him in surprise, finding him blushing.  
"Then?" Encouraging him to keep speaking, Marc squeezes Dani's hand.  
"We could always adopt, right?" Marc's jaw drops, this certainly comes unexpected. _You're thinking about us like that? Really? As in forever? Wow._ Next to him, Dani coughs and then mutters, "Sorry, I mean... it's way too early to discuss that but it's... you asked and I guess that's just what popped up in my head. I'm not saying we should or would just... we... I mean..." Marc suppresses a chuckle at the most adorable and cutest babbling he's ever heard from Dani and leans over to press a quick peck on the older man's cheek.  
"It's okay, Dani. Really. And I think I might like the idea," he leans forward for another peck, "at least, in the very long run."  
The rest of the drive is silence, but Marc catches some sideway glances from Dani that are somewhere between fond and coy and that he likes. A lot. 

They arrive at Vale's in the early evening, greeted by an overly excited Italian and a slightly insecure American, and welcomed warmly by both of them. They decided not to mention the sudden influx of people that they were expecting the next day, wanting to have a somewhat carefree evening with Vale and Nicky, where all the angst and worries could be pushed aside and blissfully ignored for a while. Either way, Marc doesn't fail to notice some concerned looks from Vale, but even if the Italian has a suspicion that something is wrong, he is nice enough to let it go and allow them their night _off duty_. They end up drinking heavily, sitting under the light of the full moon on Vale's terrace, Marc wondering whether that is becoming a pattern among the four of them now and again, Nicky, who, once he has lost the initial hesitancy, is especially cheery this night as his wrist has finally fully recovered, is the first to lose it, dropping unceremoniously to the couch, face first. They cannot help laughing, all giddy and excited and Marc enjoying himself, unwinding after a number of tough days. They chatter a while, sitting on the floor across from the sleeping Kentucky Kid, until Vale stubs another cigarette and stirs, "Sorry guys, but I have to take him to bed now. It's really too late for old men."  
Dani chuckles and clumsily gets to his feet as well. "You are only old on paper, Vale. Your mind is younger than any of ours. And let us help you, it'll be easier."  
Vale grins at them like a cheshire cat when Dani, struggling to keep himself up on his feet reaches out towards Marc, who barely manages to get a hold of the other's hand and who, upon standing up, notices that his legs are shaky as well.  
"I doubt you'll be of help here very much, kids. But before you go, congrats, I'm glad you worked it out." Vale pulls a protesting Nicky up, steadying him on their way inside and turns his head a last time, giving them a smirk for which the description devilishly would still be flattering. "And don't worry, the walls here are pretty thick, enjoy yourselves."  
Dani and Marc stay in their respective spots, both blushing and giggling at Vale's remark. Inside, Valentino must have turned on the sound system on his way out and Marc doesn't think it's a coincidence for a second, when he hears the words to the song... baila morena, sotto questa luna piena... and Dani has understood as well, he thinks because the smaller man is now looking at him fondly and challenging at the same time. Almost invisibly, Marc nods and puts his hands around Dani's neck, feeling Dani's arms close around his waist and their lips lock in a kiss, a gentle one, without the taste of blood but still sending beautiful stings down Marc's veins. And when they're breaking apart for air, he nuzzles his head into Dani's shoulder and hisses into the smaller man's ear, "One day, I want to be able to just take you out, for dinner and movies and dancing and I want to do all the things with you that other couples can do."  
Dani's voice comes out slightly muffled as he's speaking into Marc's hair now, "That will be wonderful." _You said WILL, not WOULD._


	23. Cambierà - It Will Change

Dani is leaning against the floor length window that separates the living room from the terrace, Marc leaning against him, pinning his wrists against the cool glass firmly and kissing him as if there was no tomorrow. When the younger rider leans closer and jerks his hips forward, creating a delicious friction between them, Dani's mind starts going blank, feeling clouded, almost as if Dani was watching himself stand there, under the moonlight with the chill of cool air sending shivers down his spine. Like watching from above, disbelief on his face and too distant to fully process or react, he sees Marc drop to his knees in front of him, letting go of his hands to start unbuttoning his jeans. Dani cannot believe he is going to do _that_ , but at the same time he knows exactly that Marc is going to do just that and his hands clench into Marc's hair with urgency, trying to steady himself as his legs are shaky with anticipation and lust. Marc's dark chocolate eyes look up to him through long lashes, challenging and affectionate at the same time, while the slender fingers of the young man shove down Dani's pants, his mouth instantly planting kisses on the cotton of Dani's boxer briefs, making the smaller rider buck forward and groan. He hears Marc chuckle but he is too far gone to answer to it, too busy holding himself upright at the moment, especially as Marc's fingers are now pushing down his underwear excruciatingly slow. For a brief moment, Marc pauses, looking up to him questioningly and it needs all Dani's concentration to hum in approval and nod, slightly panting now and his hands still holding on to Marc's hair. He almost screams with lust when Marc's lips close around his tip now, sucking him in and swallowing him down deeply. Involuntarily, Dani jerks his hips forward, probably choking Marc who doesn't complain though and just takes his hands to press Dani against the glass tightly, not leaving him any room to thrust forward. This way, obliged to endure Marc's rhythm, Dani feels the heat in his guts rise quickly, feels his body flood with adrenaline and an ever growing desire while Marc's mouth and tongue move around his dick, the young rider certainly well aware of what he was doing and how it should be done. When the familiar tension builds up inside his veins, Dani tries to warn him, mumbling, "Close, so, close," and trying to pull Marc's head back by his hair. The older Marquez has no intention to back off though and then, Dani cannot restrain himself anymore, coming forcefully down Marc's throat, a scream of the younger man's name on his lips.  
Caught in a world of colourful explosions, he rests in his place, breathing heavily and legs trembling, only vaguely noticing Marc finishing off himself and collapsing against Dani's knees. Only now does he realize that he's still clinging to Marc's hair and instead of letting go, he pulls him up, their bodies flush against each other. Dani kisses Marc, tasting himself on the younger man's lips. "Do you think that's what Vale meant?" He chuckles against Marc's cheek.  
"Possibly," the younger rider laughs briefly as well, "I mean... dance under the full moon... could be a metaphor for this, right?"  
Dani nods and then wraps his arms around Marc's neck. "It's getting cold. We should go inside as well." He feels Marc close his jeans between them and then, without much ado, Marc just lifts him up and carries him towards the bed. It's a strange feeling, very strange, because even so Dani is used to be the shorter partner - most women he dated had been taller than him as well - but so far, he's always been the stronger partner - and this time, he obviously isn't. Marc drops him to the bed and flops down right next to him, both of them wriggling out of their clothes hastily to cuddly up against each other. "You're perfect, you know that?" Dani whispers into Marc's ear.  
"Of course," even in the vague light, he can feel Marc's grin against his face. "But so are you." Marc leans towards him, kissing him gently. Dani wonders if Marc worries about tomorrow, if he expects Dani to ask about it but in the end, he settles on pushing it aside, not raising any inconvenient topics in this moment that feels so delicate, and he slowly starts to drift away, although he can feel Marc still stir, making him guess that indeed, Marc Marquez is nervous. _Says a lot about their brother-brother relationship._.

Over breakfast, facing a beaming Valentino who looks as proud as if was alone responsible for their relationship and a very hungover Nicky, Marc finally blurted out the news and Dani watched the two other riders stare back at his boyfriend in something between denial and disbelief. To his surprise, Nicky recovered first, speaking after an audible gulp, "And they are having it?"  
Marc shrugs. "If it's due in January, I don't think they have a choice."  
"January?" Valentino almost squeals and Dani cringes, he cannot believe it either.  
"How could they not notice?" Nicky is again quicker at recovery.  
"I don't know," Marc shrugs again, "that's one of things I want to ask them when they get here."  
"I didn't know he had a girlfriend," Nicky says, his voice contemplative now. "He's so young."  
"He's eighteen, he's old enough for that," Marc says with an equally distant voice, "but I don't think she was his girlfriend."  
Dani sees Vale almost choke on some cereal, but there's not time left now, the doorbell already ringing. _They must have driven all night._ Dani is amazed at the easy acceptance of Vale and Nicky, who do not complain about the sudden invasion once. Instead, Vale welcomes everybody, men, women, boys, girls, regardless. For Dani, the influx feels a bit overwhelming, too many things happening at once but he's again astonished to see how easily everything dissolves. Jorge's girlfriend, Clara, whom he meets for the first time, takes Alex's girlfriend who is on the verge of tears, straight to a bedroom, Vale joining them to show them the way, Alex and Marc head for the kitchen and he is left with Nicky and Jorge and a heap of bags. "Just leave 'em there, we can sort that through later," Nicky says, dragging them out to the terrace with him. On the way, Dani notices Jorge glancing at him with inscrutable eyes occasionally. They sink into Vale's comfortable lounge furniture, the heat glistening already despite it only being mid-morning and Nicky holds out a packet of cigarettes, an offer Dani gladly accepts. Jorge raises an eyebrow at first but then joins them anyway and they sit in silence, their eyes following the little grey lines of smoke absentmindedly. After a while in somewhat awkward tension, Dani decides to clear this up once and for all and pierces Jorge's eyes with curiosity. "So, you and Marc?"  
Jorge only looks surprised for an instant, then shrugs and starts talking, "I don't know how much he told you but I assure you it's over."  
"I figured that out," Dani says, the words coming out harsher than intended. "How did it start though?" Nicky is following their conversation with interest but without any surprise in his face and Dani wonders how much the American knows about all this.  
"Valencia 2011." Jorge says the city and year if it explains everything. _And it kind of does, the atmosphere back then had been devastating._ "We were all not quite ourselves and Marc and I both came there, got rewards and didn't even know if we'd ever race again." _Strange, at the time I never realized it was that serious with their injuries._ "We were clinging to each other because it felt as if we didn't have anything else and then, as soon as we were back on the bike and suddenly did have something else to hold on to, it stopped. I hope it's... well... okay for you?" Dani nods slowly, out of the corner seeing Nicky exhale with relief. _It's really okay, now. Because I saw you together and there's really nothing. He looks different when he looks at me._ Silence falls back on them, Nicky handing out a second round of cigarettes. After a moment, Jorge props his chin up on his hand and looks at the American expectantly. "How did you and Vale end up together?" Dani watches Nicky blush and shake his head, but in the end, the Kentucky kid does answer, probably realizing that in this round, he had nothing to lose.  
"It was nothing special. We'd both had a couple of drinks together, then suddenly realized we were alone outside, smoking and Vale just kind of put his arm around me and kissed me."  
"That's all?"  
"Well, I didn't really want to go there at first, I really, really didn't, but Vale felt good and that night it suddenly fell into place, you know? We had a drink and a smoke and by the time we remembered that the other would have a penis, it was too late already." They all chuckle at the image, Dani noticing the affection in Nicky's eyes clearly. Then, Vale joins them, falling into one of the armchairs like a rock.  
"How is everybody?" _Actually, how is Marc? But I'm too polite to ask like that._  
"It's a valley of tears upstairs," Vale steals Nicky's cigarette. "But Clara is doing a great job." Jorge's eyes light up with pride and seeing that makes Dani grin widely. "And Alex and Marc are in the kitchen, talking over some coffee. Marc stopped yelling." _Marc yelled... what a cute bigger brother. And he'll make an even cuter dad one day._

_un'altra notte finisce_  
 _e un giorno nuovo sarà_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Another night ends_   
>  _And it will be a new day_


	24. Lei, Gli Amici e Tutto Il Resto - She, Friends and Everything Else

_Oh Alex..._ Marc sighs, his heart breaking at the image of his little brother sitting at the kitchen table with tear-stained cheeks and looking lost and stricken. "So... why have I never heard about her?"  
"It's not... I don't know. It's not that serious."  
"It wasn't serious. It is now," Marc interrupts.  
Alex glares at him. "We didn't plan that."  
"Yeah, I figured. But still, who is she and how did you meet her? Do you like her? I'm your brother, I want to know!" Marc glares right back.  
His younger brother gives him a sigh full of resignation now. "The thing is, _I_ don't know. We met over the winter and then in spring, like around the races in Jerez and France, we started hooking up. Not even often. She's into music, she studies at the conservatory in Barcelona and that's almost all I really know."  
Marc is struck with a realization... "So that's who you visited there?" Alex blushes into a deep red and Marc sighs. "And what happened then?"  
"We kept meeting casually and then over the summer decided that we couldn't do it anymore. I mean... I don't want to give up racing, she doesn't want to give up music and only seeing each other once a month was suddenly more like stress." Alex shrugs helplessly now.  
"Why did you never say a word?" It's really getting to him, because in his mind, they'd always been so close. Why didn't Alex share?  
"Because I never loved her and she didn't love me and I thought you wouldn't approve of what we were doing."  
"But I haven't been any different?!" Marc stares at his brother in confusion before he decides that it doesn't matter anymore, not with the mess they're in. "Oh Alex. And so, it's due in January... what does that mean? How far along is she?"  
"Sixth month." Alex's voice is barely audible and Marc snorts coffee over the kitchen table.  
"How could you not notice?"  
Alex shrugs. "You've seen her... would you have guessed?"  
 _Okay... you have a point here little brother._ Marc really wants to ask so much more, but he also sees that Alex is drained and wound and just a tiny step from breaking down, so he decides that it really won't matter whether they talk now or another time. _It's not going to run away._ With another deep sigh, he walks around the table and pulls his little brother into a hug, his heart shattering into pieces when Alex sobs on his shoulder.

They spend another three days at Vale's place and at times, it's even reasonably funny. Carla, whom Marc has to admit is a perfect match for Jorge, does a good job at taking over motherly duties towards Marta, making the incredibly young-looking girl slowly open up a little, although Marc still has the feeling she dies from fear every time he looks in her direction. She looks and seems genuinely sweet and he approves of his younger brother's taste, despite the circumstances not being ideal for such a realization. And Dani gets along with Jorge, which is taking a huge burden of his shoulders because it had him seriously worried. Also, Vale being Vale, the Italian manages to cheer up all of them most of the time. Some of their meals, pasta, salad, wine around the huge kitchen table, feel like perfect family dinners, laughter and chatter filling the room. _As if we've always been here together... it's actually pretty damned wonderful._ And the starry nights, under a full moon, on Vale's terrace, they belong only to Dani and him, their lips red from wine, their eyes blurred with lust. It's so blissful, that it makes Marc forget the circumstances, makes him forget the problems they have to solve, even pushing aside the fact that both, he and Alex, lied to their parents about what they're doing. None of it matters in these moments of perfection. But even the most gorgeous break from reality comes to an end, noisily and hectically on Wednesday morning when it's time to get to Misano. Jorge had even taken care of ordering a hotel room for the girls so that they could join them - a necessity with Marta basically being homeless for the time being and Marc and Alex are both thankful for the older Spaniard's thoughtfulness. Poor Alex had recovered a fair bit over their days at the ranch, but the closer it gets to the departure, the whiter his cheeks. And Marc understands, feeling similar, because in Misano, they will meet their father and they will have to start explaining _a lot_.

However, with race weekends being race weekends, all of them are absorbed into business the second their feet touch the track. Forgotten the last secret pecks in the parking garage, forgotten the longing and yearning in their eyes, when the four couples broke apart, knowing that for the next four days, they could only meet in the secrecy of the night. The stress of competition swallows them, sucks them in, keeping each one busy to the limits and only spitting them out late at night, exhausted and sweaty. _But it's so much better when YOU come crawling under my covers every night._ Marc awaits Dani impatiently, each and every night. Sometimes, he wonders how it is for the girls, who must be bored out of their minds during the day, and he wants to ask Jorge why he isn't open about seeing Clara, but then Marc is busy with so many other things that he never gets around to finish the thoughts. Racing has enough power over him to absorb him and his mind and he is sure that for Dani it's the exact same thing. And it pays off, with them scoring P1 and P3 in qualifying.  
"We will be celebrating that tonight." It's a dangerous hiss, Dani secretly tilting his head towards Marc's ear and smirking like a devil while he does so. _I wish it was night already. You are such a tease._ Marc tries to shake the images out of his mind, trying to focus on the press conference, not failing to notice Dani's smug face and deliberately kicking Dani's leg under the table. _You'll regret that one. Seriously._

_Nati per vivere..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _born to live_


	25. Hechizo - Spell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beware of the cliffhanger. If you are easily bothered, you might want to wait until chapter 26 is up before you start reading.

It's the night before the race, the night after a glorious qualifying, and Dani has not forgotten his promise. Using the spare keycard, he sneaks into Marc's room to the image of his boyfriend splayed out on his back over the bed, naked and tan body against white sheets. It's a breathtaking image and the smug grin on the younger rider's face gives away that he knows exactly what he's doing to Dani, who absentmindedly drops the card and sheds his clothes, eyes on Marc all the time, marvelling every muscle and every inch of skin, before he crawls over to the bed, propping himself up over Marc and returning the devilish grin. "Ready for your prize?" Instead of an answer, Marc's hands reach around his neck, pulling him down into a violent kiss. _I suppose this means that you are._ Dani is planting kisses over Marc's body, pinning the taller rider down on the bed by straddling his legs and holding his wrists down, indulging in the moans and swears pouring out of Marc's mouth, the squirming and the wincing. Marc is a gorgeous sight when he's unravelling, letting his guards down and showing the man behind the broad smile, revealing himself in all his vulnerability. And Dani has braced himself, ever since the end of qualifying, to do this, to overcome his stupid issues and he is gently discovering Marc's chest with his tongue now, making his way down. He has reached Marc's bellybutton when the young rider, still squirming and panting beautifully, presses out a helpless. "You don't have to-"  
"I want to." Dani growls. _I do, seriously._ He is letting go of Marc's wrists now, shuffling further down on the bed, his fingers closing around Marc's cock followed by a loud moan from the taller man whose hands are searching for a hold in the sheets now. Dani is eyeing Marc's cock, swallowing one last time and drawing in a sharp breath before his lips close around it, his tongue carefully testing Marc's reaction. Suddenly, there is nothing uncomfortable or strange or awkward about it anymore, because when Dani moves to swallow more of him, his tongue swirling around it, the noises Marc makes compensate for everything. They've had a number of passionate encounters, but never has Dani heard his own name with as much despair as he does now, sending a shiver down his spine. Never has Marc winced and whimpered so unmanly and eagerly under him, making Dani's guts heat up and his own cock twitch despite the concentration he needs for this. In his head, he tries to remember all the things Marc did to him during that night on Vale's terrace that felt so good and he tries to repeat them, as good as he can. Judging by the needy sounds coming from Marc right now, he is doing it right. He's bopping his head up and down now, Marc's hands have found their way into his hair and the room is filling more and more with obscene noises. Then, he feels Marc's grip tightening, feels the tension build up inside of him and hears him hiss, "Close," but there is no way he is backing off now, the nervousness having fallen from him a long time ago. He revels in the feeling that he is capable of doing this to Marc, of turning him into this needy heap, ripping those sounds from him. Marc comes with Dani's name on his lips, as usual, and Dani is overwhelmed by the moment, choking at first, fighting to swallow but ultimately making it through, collapsing next to Marc, his head on the young man's stomach. They are both panting and Dani feels the irregular heaving of Marc's chest against his head. It's slowly steadying as they're both regaining composure. After a while, Marc's fingers are running through Dani's hair, making him shiver and melt into the touch. From above, he hears Marc's voice, still slightly hoarse, "You didn't...-"  
"I'm drained anyway. Tomorrow," Dani whispers, feeling too exhausted for anything right now. The air is feeling cool now that they're not exactly moving anymore and Marc seems to have noticed, too, pulling the cover over both of them while Dani shuffles to move upwards, his head now on Marc's shoulder, lanky arms draped around him protectively.  
Dani rests on his side, watching Marc's peaceful face, chocolate eyes looking back at him affectionately. _I love you. It's the first thing I want to say every time you look at me this way. And then I chicken out. I really do though and one day I will tell you._ After a while of mutual staring, affectionate looks and disbelieving chuckles, Marc closes his eyes and pulls Dani closer, gently kissing his hair. "Goodnight, Dani." And for an instant, Dani thinks that Marc wanted to say something more. _I'm under your spell because everything about you is magic. And the most magical is that you don't even see it._

The alarm wakes him at 5am, as always, and after a gentle goodbye kiss, he sneaks back to his hotel room, bumping into Vale on his way - not for the first time this weekend. They exchange their usual knowing smile and he receives a friendly pat on the shoulder from the Yamaha rider today. It's a final brief nap, a shower and breakfast among all the riders and teammembers, trying desperately to stop himself from grinning sheepishly or smiling fondly at Marc all the time. He's on autopilot for the rest of the morning then, his mind zoning out into the usual pre-race tunnel. Only for an instant, short before the start, he returns to his normal senses, secretly squeezing Marc's butt and getting a rapid peck on his cheek in return. On his way on to the grid, he sees Julia and briefly wonders if Marc and Alex talked to him, but he'd know if they had and then there was almost no time. Still, Marc had announced to Dani that he'd go to Switzerland tonight, not to Spain and Dani wonders how it will go down with Julia, before he's completely immersed in the pre-race atmosphere. His start works really well, allowing him to take P3 behind Marc and Jorge, who nevertheless appear to be a class of their own, quickly putting a decent gap between them and him. Dani's in full attack mode though, fighting to get away from Vale and Dovi behind him. It's during the tenth lap, he's still keeping the Italians at arm's length, when he feels his rear tire slide that little bit too far onto the curb and there is a brief instant where he knows the inevitable is going to happen, where he braces himself for the moment, but then he's already flying. His mind is already pexpecting the pain and there's one last thought before everything goes black. _Dammit, I should have just said it._

_y no entiendes porqué_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _and you don't understand why_


	26. Oración - Prayer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought about uploading this in teasingly short pieces so that it would keep to the "one POV per chapter" rule, but I decided against that. So, there's several POV's and I hope I made everything neat and clean.  
> It's been a pain to write and I hope I'm not disappointing too much :/  
> As for the "good news/bad news" questions: I guess that depends on your POV... but I am afraid this is not quite what some people were waiting for?!

**Jorge & Clara**

Jorge missed the accident, obviously, as it happened behind him and Marc, but of course he noticed the yellow flags, the crashed Repsol bike and the rider next to it. And as they passed it, round after round, he saw the medical car and the hectic marshals and an uneasy feeling crept into his guts, the memories of 2011 flashing up inside his head. He worried about Dani, increasingly, because round after round passed without a sign of him getting up and that's never good. Suddenly, he realizes that Marc is gone and he hasn't quite seen where he's gone to, but there's only one logical explanation. _I can't imagine you pulled out of the race for him._  
Clara is in Jorge's motorhome, watching on a TV screen with Marta when it happens and the images scare her to death. She is always struggling with Jorge's profession, it has always been a source of concern, but right now it is pure fear. It has originally been her idea to step back, to hide herself, not be seen with him in the pit, but right now, she really wishes she was with the Yamaha team and could ask someone, could hear something. She had just met Dani and he'd been somewhat reserved, but at the same time he'd been a true gentleman, a great listener and a wonderful support for Marc. She hadn't missed the way the two riders had looked at each other and had been in awe about their cuteness. When she realizes he's not getting up, she starts biting her nails and a quick glance at Marta shows her that the young girl is doing the same. It's a couple of rounds after the crash, when the cameras catch images of a second Honda, stopping close to the accident scene and her jaw drops when she sees the footage of Marc running across the gravel. 

**Alex & Marta**

The second where he sees Marc stop next to Dani, he sees his father's jaw drop and he hears the gasping, the murmur at the Repsol garage. When more and more questioning eyes are directed at him, his father, Santi and Emilio definitely glaring at him openly, he does the only thing he can think of - and runs away, knocking at Jorge's motorhome wildly. It's Clara who opens but Marta throws himself at him the second he enters and he thinks her cheeks feel damp against his and he's overwhelmed with everything, the accident, the worry about Dani and Marc, the look on his father's face and the realization that she cares, she actually cares so deeply. Alex's arms wrap around the still so small frame, his head nuzzled in her hair, smelling her familiar shampoo. "He'll be okay, right? Please say he'll be alright." Alex swallows hard and over Marta's shoulder he sees Clara, pale and eyes questioning him as well, the TV footage showing an image of Marc yelling at a Marshal now then switching to the Honda box where everybody is still between horror and confusion, his father cringing at the pictures of his brother. The fact that they're not even showing Dani... Alex swallows again and whispers into Marta's hair, squeezing her tightly, "I really hope he will."  
Marta feels she's been weak for long enough now, countless tears shed and many sleepless nights spend. So, yes, they were in trouble but compared to what was going on now, they were really fine. With the back of her hand, she clears the tears of her face and then takes Alex's hand, exchanging an intense look with him. _I think we have to do it. Now._ And she pulls him after her, out of the motorhome, confused at first but then finding the right direction and pulling him towards the pits.

**Marc**

They finally let him wait in Dani's room, next to Dani's bed, finally allowing him to hold the hand of the man he loves. The unharmed hand anyway, Dani's other arm completely in cast and gaze. _He should wake up soon, that's what they said. Isn't it soon yet?_ He doesn't remember how he got here. Only brief scenes appear in front of his head, him yelling at the marshals to be let through, the flashlights of cameras when he ran inside the hospital. And he cannot believe they all came, dropping in one after the other. Clara and Jorge, hugging tightly, Alex holding Marta, Vale and Nicky holding hands, Alberto and Emilio, worried out of their minds and awkwardly avoiding to ask him or anyone else what actually was going on between them... and finally, his father, not angry or disappointed at all, just worried and a bit older than normal, his eyes darting back and forth between him, Alex and Marta full of concern and worry. _It's good that he knows... I hope Alex has told him everything._ And then he realizes that whatever he may have actually done - he remembers running towards Dani's crumpled body clearly - it had certainly been caught on camera and surely been on worldwide television. The thought makes him blush and squirm, realizing that he outed Dani without Dani's consent. Everybody had asked him if or how they could help, but in the end, the only thing he wanted had been to sit here with Dani and he doesn't know for sure who managed to get him in here, but someone, most likely Alberto, somehow did.  
His eyes wander over Dani, tears streaming down his face because seeing Dani so hurt, so vulnerable is agonizing for him. Dani's pale face and all the machines around him are worrying Marc and breaking his heart. He'd switch positions in an instant, he'd do anything for Dani to just stand up and be okay. _He looks even smaller like this. And so lost._ He's been speaking so many silent prayers over the course of this day, he doesn't remember ever having done that, having pleaded so desperately with a God he sometimes isn't even sure exists. With a sigh, Marc gently picks up Dani's hand, moving it to his mouth and presses a brief kiss to it. And just as if it was a fairy tale, he feels Dani stir soon after. Then, watching with hope and relief flooding through his body, Marc sees him open his eyes, confused and shocked at first but the moment their gazes lock, Marc sees Dani's look fill with affection and he squeezes the smaller rider's hand tightly. Marc's voice almost fails him when he speaks. "You're awake!" It takes a while before Dani is composed enough to speak and when he does, his voice is painfully soft and broken. "Did you win?"  
Tears flow freely from Marc's eyes now, realizing how selfless Dani is thinking even here, under these circumstances, and he shakes his head desperately. "No," he croaks, "I pulled out."  
Dani squeezes his hand tightly, staring at him in disbelief and Marc shrugs, "I was out of my mind, I couldn't go any longer." Marc swallows. "How are you?"  
"I don't know. Everything hurts." Dani looks at him with a wry smile. "But it's a positive that I feel anything I suppose."  
Feeling tears dwell up again, Marc evades Dani's gaze and mumbles, "I am sorry." After a moment and a squeeze of his hand, he looks at Dani, who is giving him a very quizzical look now and with his heart thundering again and his blood freezing from fear, Marc blurts it out, "I think I outed us with my idiocy." He is close to breaking down and his heart is thundering relentlessly from the nervousness. He is terribly afraid how Dani will take it, but the older man just smiles at him with the most beautiful little shrug Marc has ever seen.  
"I don't think I care about being out anymore." Marc's mind processes the words slowly, his jaw dropping open. He is just about to ask Dani something when the door swings open, a doctor entering with a content smile.  
After a little chatter on how he's feeling and Dani admitting that he is tired and in pain, the doctor looks at them with a stern face, an eyebrow raised. "I want to discuss some medical things and I think, maybe it would-" Marc understands the unwelcoming way the man looks at him immediately and prepares to leave, but Dani is clutching his wrist with so much despair, that he's glued to the chair.  
"I want my boyfriend to stay." If this had happened in any other situation, Marc would be beaming at Dani now.  
"Okay, Mister Pedrosa. So what happened is -" the doctor has not even finished a sentence when Dani interrupts with a croaky voice.  
"I don't care what happened. How long?" And after a puzzled look from the doctor, he specifies, "When will I race again?"  
"Well, you... actually... there's a possibility..." Babbling is not good, Marc thinks to himself, his heart hammering in his chest with fear and Dani's grip on his wrist almost intense enough to break his bones. He hears the doctor take in a sharp breath. "We don't have the results yet, but the way it looks right now the fractures on your arm and wrist are pretty serious and nerves and muscles might have suffered permanent damage." Marc winces internally and he feels like hearing the words thunder and growl through the room before the doctor even said them, his mind echoing a similar situation three years ago. "You might never be able to race again." Dani is certainly not listening to anything after that, staring at Marc with a blank look of terror and Marc cannot focus on the doctor's explanations, only catching occasional words and fragments, things like "lucky you're alive", "broken ribs" or "bruised spine" and after a few minutes and when he realizes that neither rider is capable of paying any attention, the doctor finally excuses himself and leaves. And after another eternity, Marc's gaze meets Dani's, the younger man's heart shattering at the pain in Dani's face. He leans down, their foreheads touching now and Dani sobbing quietly. "I don't care if this is the right place for it, and it's certainly the wrong time but I really fucking thought you would die out there and I know you don't want to hear it but I think he's right and you're damned lucky to be alive and I'm damned lucky that you are. Because when I saw you laying there I thought it was too late, I seriously thought you'd go before I could tell you. I love you Dani, so much, so, so much and please don't ever go away." Marc draws in a desperate breath before he continues with a soft and barely audible voice, "Because if you did, I think I couldn't go anymore either." And Dani is still sobbing but his functioning hand is reaching out for Marc's head, running through his hair and between the sobs and the weeping, Dani speaks with a hoarse and urgent voice, his teary eyes pleading with Marc's, "I'll be okay. As long as you are here, I'll be okay. Just don't ever leave." Dani coughs briefly and Marc hears him inhale sharply, "And I love you, too."

**Vale & Nicky**

Vale, as he has done before, decides to sort things matter-of-factly now. He sends Nicky to talk to Emilio and Alberto, Jorge took over the task of informing Dani's family, Clara is taking Marta for some food and he sits down with Alex and Julia, finally forcing them to come to terms with each other.  
When everything feels at least temporarily arranged, Vale and Nicky meet in front of Dani's room again. "How did it go?" Vale looks at Nicky expectantly. The American shrugs.  
"I think they are taking it easier than we'd expected. But they're too shocked to judge. The news Alberto got from the staff aren't too good, I think."  
Vale swallows audibly. Of course, they should be happy he's alive and not going to die on them, but the possible career ending has been muttered and whispered about too much on this day. He hears Nicky cough. "How is Julia taking it?"  
"Surprisingly well. I think him getting used to the thought of Marc and Dani so quickly kind of implies that he suspected something like that."  
"And Alex?"  
Vale shrugs. "I suppose under other circumstances, he'd be in living hell with his father, but right now there's so much going on, Julia just hugged him and got all sniffy and said they'd work it out as long as Alex would promise him to never scare him like that. I think, he's just realizing that it could have been one of his sons in that gravel."  
"It could have been you in that gravel," Nicky whispers, his hand clutching desperately to Valentino's and the Italian's heart freezes, because obviously... "It could have been you, too." And they stand in front of Dani's door, gazes locked, teary eyes and they don't even need words to say it right now, they just _know_.  
When finally, after there's no reply to their tentative knocking, they decide to enter the hospital room silently, the door opens to the most adorable sight, Marc, finally stripped from his racing suit and instead in boxer briefs and Alex's hoodie, is lying cuddled up against Dani, both squeezed in the small hospital bed, carefully arranged around the drips and tubes and everything else and they're both sound asleep, despite the horrible neon light and the constant beeping. Vale's hand slides into Nicky's again, the American's head dropping to the Italian's shoulder. With a soft sigh, Valentino tilts his head down and presses a kiss on Nicky's hair. _The world knows about this, I guess. It will never be the same for any of us and suddenly, I don't even care, as long as those two make it through this._

_y no hay oración_  
 _capaz de decidir por mí_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _and there is no prayer,_   
>  _that can decide for me_


	27. Bendecida - Blessed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Under the circumstances, this is a tooth-rottingly fluffy interlude. I needed the fluff and I figured they'd deserve it. So, hope you'll enjoy, darkness is bound to return soon enough.

Dani wakes up confused and puzzled, not fully aware where he is and that is not a pleasant feeling. Then, a wave of pain washes over him along with the realization that he cannot move his right arm. Panic rises in his guts at first, but when he feels and hears Marc breathing next to him, his nerves calm instantly. Slowly, he opens his eyes, blinking to adjust to the light, finding Marc's head next to his, the younger rider stirring now as well. With the beeping sounds around them all the things that happened yesterday pop back into his head. Everything. _There's a possibility that you may never ride again._ Dani bites his bottom lip vigorously. _That won't happen. I'm sure Vale's heard it before, so has Jorge and Marc has definitely heard it. And they're all still riding and so will I._ He blinks again, but this time, it's not because of the light but to chase away the tears that were beginning to dwell. In front of him, Marc's eyelids open rapidly, two drops of chocolate staring at him full of concern at first. Then the young man's face gradually turns into an affectionate smile. "Hello there," Marc whispers, voice still rough from sleeping and Dani feels Marc's lips against his, feels Marc's hand slide in his under the sheets, thumb caressing Dani's knuckles.  
A rustling in the room disturbs both of them, their heads lifting and turning in unison. It's a surreal sight, an unbelievable one. If it wasn't for Marc next to him, squeezing his hand tightly now, Dani would think he was sleeping. Across the room, they were all still there. Their entire tiny "replacement family" had camped in his hospital, or was still camping. _This is the cutest thing I've ever seen and it's the best thing anyone has ever done for me._ Marta and Alex were curled up in a chair together, their hands laced on Marta's stomach and that alone would be enough to make him teary after everything they'd gone through. But next to them, Vale and Nicky had each taken a chair, heads bumped against each other and if he wasn't completely wrong, Nicky was drooling on Vale's shoulder. Dani chuckles and keeps looking, equally shocked and in awe at the image of his manager in the fourth chair. Alberto Puig, asleep in an uncomfortable plastic hospital chair. _I wish I could take a picture._ He feels a tiny nudge against his arm and his eyes follow Marc's finger, realizing that Jorge and Clara are asleep next to their bed, using a stack of their jackets as mattresses and pillows. Dani shakes his head in disbelief and locks gazes with Marc, who returns the look with just as much joyful surprise. "I can't believe they did that!"  
Marc shakes his head now and replies, "Me neither. My dad and Emilio left though." Dani thinks there's a bit of disappointment in his voice but just as if it was their cue, the door opens to Julia and Emilio, both with a coffee in their hand, silently whispering while they are coming in. With relief and awe, Dani watches Marc's face light up at their appearance and then the two men look a them, realizing they're awake. Next, Dani witnesses an entire wordless communication between father and son right under his eyes and he doesn't understand a thing of it, cannot read the myriads of expressions on their faces, but it ends with Marc nodding and Julia shrugging and then both of them smiling, so Dani assumes it ended favorably. Emilio pats Marc's shoulder with a tired sigh when he passes the bed, resignation on his face and Marc is just beaming. _God, you're so beautiful when you are smiling._ "How are you feeling?" Marc's eyes are serious when he looks at him now.  
"It still hurts. But it's okay."  
"Should I get you a nurse?"  
Dani shakes his head. "No, let them sleep." The big clock on the wall says 5.30, so they really should get some more rest. He hears Julia and Emilio murmur softly and the rest of them breathes and snores peacefully, making Dani giggle. "I wish we could take a photo. That's priceless!"  
"It would be mean... and perfect!" Marc reaches for his phone and goes ahead, both of them giddy with excitement. It ends up an entire series of pictures of very sleepy people - and a frowning and glaring manager/father duo that would probably yell at them if it wasn't for the others. After a while, Marc stops and they scroll through the images, suppressing loud chuckles and letting out muffled giggles. _As if we were thirteen years old. And girls. You're doing strange things to me._ Then, dropping the phone back to the nightstand, Marc's head falls back to the pillow, his eyes staring into Dani's completely serious and his hand carefully tracing Dani's face. "I love you." And it almost sounds as if he cannot believe it himself, Dani thinks, smiling broadly at the young man.  
"I love you, too. And I can't believe you did that for me!"  
"Did what?" Marc frowns.  
"Give up your race. And the streak." Dani whispers, suddenly feeling incredibly guilty about everything.  
"I'm not racing for wins, only for the title and it won't hurt my mission the least, so don't worry." Marc knows him well enough and obviously realized the change in his mood and Dani is grateful for his intuition. "And you are more important than all that anyway. I hope you know that. It's you first and then racing. I'll gladly have both, but if anyone ever asks me to choose, I'll always pick you!"  
Dani's mind processes the words and he loses the fight against the tears. _I don't believe you just said that. Loving me is a big thing but picking me over racing is just HUGE... I guess whatever this leads to, I've just been blessed._

_bendecida fue la causa de mi fortuna_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _blessed was the cause of my fortune_


	28. I Will Follow You Into The Dark

An exasperated nurse shoos all of them out of the room short after six, leading to a huge group of yawning, stretching and ruffled looking people standing clueless in the hallway. "So, how do we deal with this?" Emilio asks after a while, lowering his gaze when everyone's eyes are on him.  
"Has anyone of us checked the media reaction to... well-" Alberto shrugs helplessly and they're shaking their heads.  
It's Vale - of course - who is quickest to recover. "I suppose," he says with a huge yawn, "since we cannot change anything and it's too early to actually do something about it, we can have breakfast first?" And that's what they do, all of them picking on their food in silence, awkward tension palpable around them. They break into smaller groups afterwards, the smokers heading outside, Emilio and Alberto determined to face the rest of the world, and Alex and Clara fussing over a not-so-well Marta.

Meanwhile, Marc sits with his father in the hallway, having their first private conversation since the crash and Julia announcing that in order for everything to cool off a bit, he will be taking Alex and Marta home to Cervera. "I assume you won't be going with us?" Julia looks at Marc, neither angry nor happy, just somehow pensively and very serious. Marc swallows, relieved that he won't have to fight on this one.  
"I'm definitely staying, yes."  
"Take care of yourself. And of Dani."  
"Thank you."  
Julia pulls him into a hug, patting his back. "I wish you had told us, you know. And don't misunderstand, I have tons of questions. But I think, they can wait. For now, just do what you need to do. He's a nice guy."  
"I know."  
"I have no idea what reactions you will be getting for... you know. I guess it can get ugly. Just, I love you, Marc, we love you. _This_ doesn't change anything about who you are and what you mean to us, okay?"  
Marc nods, a lump forming in his throat and his eyes watering, again. He swallows a couple of times, before he takes his father's hand and speaks again, "Thank you, for everything. And I'm sorry I didn't come to you earlier. Promise me you won't kill Alex?" Marc gives his father pleading look and Julia smiles at him.  
"I won't. Promised. But he will have to explain."  
 _That's only fair._  
"We'll leave then. Should we get your stuff from the hotel?"  
"No, I think I'll send Emilio." They start walking outside together, Marc wanting to say goodbye to Alex and Marta.  
"Have you heard from Honda?"  
"No, haven't looked at my phone. Do you think they'll fire me?"  
"Never. You might have created an incredible mess, but if there's any driver on the grid who'd get away with it easily, it's you. They'd never find a replacement."  
"How obvious was it? On television? Do they all know?"  
They've almost made it to the car but Julia stops now, a hand on Marc's shoulder. "They don't KNOW as in you didn't kiss him on screen, but the whole world saw you give up your race and go to the hospital with him. So far, Alberto and Emilio have gone with no comment and only made a statement about Dani being seriously hurt but not in critical condition. You've not been mentioned and I suppose, you could still try to ignore it, but I doubt you'd get through with it." Marc nods slowly. "And Marc?" He throws his father a quizzical look. "You're not a coward, right?" His father winks at him and they take the final steps to the car, Marc still contemplating Julia's words.  
Alex and Marta are waiting for them already and he hugs both of them. "Take care, the _three_ of you!" He puts his hand on Marta's stomach briefly, making the young girl blush. _I know you had other plans but this is so incredible._ "Watch out for your family, Alex!" He gives his brother a last friendly nudge, still amazed that his little brother is soon going to be responsible for a new life. Alex gives him a smirk in return and nudges him back.  
"Well, you take care of _your_ family, too."

Marc grins broadly and then waves after them when the car pulls out of the hospital's parking garage. _The hospital seems to be doing a good job at keeping the paparazzi away._ With a deep sigh, he pulls out his phone, ignoring the hundreds of messages and missed calls and dials a familiar number.  
"Santi, did I wake you?"  
...  
"Hey, yeah, it's Marc."  
...  
"I am sorry. We couldn't tell you though."  
...  
"No, actually he's not. But we don't know much. I think he needs to go to Barcelona to have that checked but Alberto will keep everybody updated about that. Santi?"  
...  
"How mad is everybody?"  
...  
"They're not?"  
...  
"O-okay. That's a bit unexpected. But I guess I kinda like politics if that's what I get from it."  
...  
"A press conference?"  
...  
"I suppose you're right. But it can wait like a week? Because i don't think he can do that now. We can't."  
...  
"Yeah, I'll let Emilio know. Will you talk to Shuhei?"  
...  
"Thank you, I appreciate it. Really."  
...  
"I will. Promised. Bye, Santi!"

Marc hangs up and stares down at the phone. _Shocked but not angry. Okay. Could have been worse._ He draws in a deep breath, knowing he owes Santi for this and makes his way back Dani's room, bumping into Jorge and Clara. "Hey, you're leaving?" "Yes, it's about time. Vale and Nicky will stay for a bit though, I think they're not ready to face it yet." Jorge shrugs and when Marc raises his eyebrows he adds, "Oh... you didn't realize, right?" Marc frowns at the Mallorcan, what is he missing out on here?  
It's Clara who comes to his rescue. "They came here together after the race. And their teams saw them leave together. I don't think they've been on TV as much as you guys," she bites her lip and blushes but when Marc just shrugs with a smile, she continues, "but they'll have to explain anyway. Uccio called and apparently, first reactions at Yamaha aren't very positive and from what I know, Nicky's team is okay, but his family is raging. They seem to be devout Catholics." Clara lowers her gaze and Marc is the one biting his lip now. It doesn't seem fair that Vale and Nicky, who basically had only instinctively wanted to help, were in so much trouble because of him.  
"Marc?" Jorge's voice interrupts his thoughts and he looks up to meet his gaze. "I'm really sorry, but we have a flight to catch. Call anytime you need something, okay? Have you heard from Honda?"  
"Don't worry, I'll be okay. And yeah, I called Santi, he says it could be worse. They're sticking to no comment until Dani is well enough to have a press conference."  
"They want you to do a conference?" Jorge gasps.  
"Mhm," Marc sighs, "to have a clean cut and stop the speculation."  
Clara raises her eyebrows and wrinkles her nose. _She's adorable and a true keeper, I hope Jorge knows._ "Does Dani know?"  
"Not yet." Marc has to gulp at the thought.  
"Oh dear. Well, all the best for the two of you. We didn't get to see Dani, he's still checked over, so tell him we said hi!"

They say their goodbyes, Marc waving after another car. With Dani still in check-ups, he decides to search out Alberto and Emilio first, not having had a private conversation with them yet and feeling that he has to get it out of the way. And it's not a pleasant _conversation_. They have checked the media responses and it seems as if his reaction has indeed spurred loads of speculations and assumptions and Alberto and Emilio both urge for a clear cut press release. Marc has no idea if Dani is really okay with it, because whatever he had said yesterday about being okay had been said under the shock of the accident's aftermath. And when he asks Alberto if he thinks Dani could cope, the reluctant reaction he gets is not convincing him. The extent of the upcoming trouble is slowly sinking in and along with it, the fear of being haunted and chased, the feeling that his dream of _normal couple things_ could be unattainable rising in his veins. After some debate on who would communicate what and Marc's insistence that everybody sticks to _no comment_ until Dani has recovered enough to have his own say, they fall silent and the young rider finally decides to head back to Dani's room, yearning to see him and also extremely worried by the lengthy check-ups. He is crossing his fingers that the results are better than those from yesterday, but with every minute that passes, his hopes drop a little.

Dani's still not in his room but he finds Vale and Nicky, sitting on the bed in silence, Nicky's head in Vale's lap who is comforting the American, the latter looking stricken. Marc draws in another sharp breath. _More guilt. It's all because of me._  
"I'm sorry." Marc is barely whispering, falling down on one of the chairs and burying his head in his hands.  
"What for?" Nicky sounds sad and tired, but also genuinely confused.  
"For drawing you into this mess." Marc's voice is muffled because he's speaking into his own hands.  
"You didn't draw us into anything." Vale huffs. "You're just a kid, I could almost be your dad. If I didn't want this to happen, I wouldn't have come here."  
"Same goes for me. It's not pretty for any of us but then, you know, someone had to start, right? And at least, we'll have company." Nicky gives him a wry smile and Marc cannot help but return it.  
"When Dani's back we'll just say goodbye and leave for my place. Should we get both of your stuff from the hotel and drop it off here?" Vale determinedly changes the topic and Marc appreciates the gesture.  
"That would be great." He looks down at himself, realizing he's still wearing a pair of jeans from Jorge and a hoodie Alex borrowed him. "I don't even have our key cards though." He shrugs helplessly.  
"We'll work it out, don't worry." _And I suppose with the two of you together I can be sure you will find a way._

They've been sitting in silence for a while when the door opens and a nurse brings in Dani, in a wheelchair, drip still attached and his face looking lost and broken in to an extent that simply crushes Marc's heart again. Emilio and Alberto both follow, they had been waiting in the hallway. And as soon as the nurse is gone, all eyes are on Dani expectantly. "I don't want to talk about it." _That's definitely a bad sign._ The small man, who looks so much smaller now, reaches out for Marc's hand who moves to sit down on the bed next to his wheelchair, lacing their fingers. "I want to get checked again in Barcelona." Marc feels him squeeze his hand.  
"Apart from your health condition and the trip probably being a stupid idea, don't you think you and Marc should avoid each other for a while? I mean... we understand and we let you go ahead until here... but now you've had your time and this relationship is not exactly...ideal before you've made an official statement, you'll only be chased around." Alberto gives them a pleading look, Emilio nodding slowly.  
" _We_ are going to Barcelona," Dani insists, giving Alberto a defiant look. Marc sees Alberto's eyes, full of disapproval and winces internally. _Oh Dani, I really didn't want to get you in trouble._ The mounting tension is relieved temporarily when Nicky and Vale excuse themselves rather hastily now, promising to drop of their bags later and squeezing both of them, but then, the second it's only the four of them, the atmosphere in the room changes to raging thunderstorm. Marc's eyes dart back and forth between Alberto and Dani and Dani finally inhales deeply and then declares, "I am not staying here. I know it's against the doctor's recommendation but I don't trust this hospital and I will go to Barcelona with Marc and get a check there. Even if you don't agree."  
Marc feels all eyes on him now and squirms uncomfortably before Dani's gaze locks with his and he's drowning in those sad puddles of mocha, surrendering to the man he loves. Giving Dani's hand another reassuring squeeze, he whispers, "I love you and if you want me there, I will be there."

_If there's no one beside you_  
 _When your soul embarks_  
 _Then I'll follow you into the dark_


	29. La Herida - The Wound

They are finally on their own, Vale and Nicky just having dropped off their bags and said a teary goodbye before heading to the ranch in order to hide for the time being. There's a tense silence in the room and although he is staring down, Dani feels Marc look at him with a frown. "Do you really think you can do the trip?"  
 _No, actually I don't. But I cannot stay here._ Dani lifts his head and their eyes meet, the concern on Marc's face making Dani uncomfortable. "Listen, I know it doesn't sound smart, but I really have to do it. I need something. Anything. Just a little spark that says 'hey, Pedrosa, you might make it'. And I need to hear that now. You understand?" He sees Marc swallow and bite his lip, sees the beginning of tears in his eyes and he could kick himself. Of course he does. Marc reaches for his hand now, clutching to it.  
"As I said, if you need to do it, I will be there." _Your eyes are still so worried and believe me, I'm sorry I'm pulling you along in this. I need you though. I've never been so dependent on anyone else in my life and I hate the feeling, but I really need you to be there._ Dani tilts his head up and pulls on Marc's arm, the younger rider getting the hint and leaning down for a kiss. _Your cheeks are damp._ It's Marc who breaks the kiss after a while, his hands on Dani's shoulders now and his eyes piercing him, scrutinizing him. "So, should I go and get a nurse so you can official sign them that you're irresponsible and stupid?" There's a smirk on Marc's face and Dani feels relieved to have a bit of the old Marc back.  
"Yes, please." And with his good hand, he pinches Marc's ass before he leaves, grinning broadly when Marc's head turns around in disbelief. "What? If you're going to be my nurse now I should be entitled to harass you a little bit." Marc feigns indignation and then just winks dirtily, smiling at Dani as beautiful as ever. For a moment, it truly feels as if things could be okay soon.

As teasingly slow as he felt the time had crept ahead at the hospital before, as fast things happened then. Papers were signed and a rental car ordered, because they certainly weren't going to sit in an airplane with a bunch of people taking selfies with them and Marc is now taking the bags to the car while Dani has the last needles removed. The staff is glaring at him, but he really doesn't care. This is about his fucking career and he isn't going to let them mess with it. A nurse with a particularly annoyed expression assists him to get his arm into the sling and he is biting the inside of his cheek desperately to avoid a yelp, not wanting to give her that satisfaction. Sitting on the edge of the bed he waits for Marc, now biting his lip and bracing himself for the inevitable pain when he has to get up. _Because there is no way I'm getting back into that wheelchair. My legs are fine._ They really are, but the bruises on his hips and spine along with the broken ribs aren't helping. "Hey, are you ready?" A tentatively smiling Marc Marquez is popping his head inside the room.  
"Yes, more than that. I'm eager." Dani holds his arm out and Marc helps him up, almost carrying him to the car. He's gritting his teeth and feels sweat break out on his forehead, his vision blurring slightly, but one step at a time and with his usual perseverance, he makes it to the garage, without crying or begging or yelping. He is panting when he leans back into the passenger seat and he knows that Marc notices. Actually, he sees the young rider cringe openly at his sight, but Marc doesn't lose a word about it and Dani is full of gratitude for his silent understanding. _Being the weak one really, really sucks._ Marc starts the car and pulls out, wordlessly. They pass a small crowd of journalists but just as Dani has done a couple of weeks ago, Marc has remembered to ask for tinted windows. With a silent moan, Dani leans his head against the car's window, the cool material soothing his burning skin. _Everything hurts._ It's not the first time he's going through this though and he knows it will get better, knows he has to breathe through it. He can feel Marc glancing at him, surely worried out of his mind, but at the same time, Dani knows that Marc has been there before as well and that Marc understands. It's a long drive, probably they'll need more than twelve hours. Dani drifts between restless sleep and drained exhaustion, watching Marc drive with determination and focus, shooting him an occasional concerned glance and emptying energy drinks like his life depends on it. Dani clutches to a small bottle of water and marvels Marc again and again, mapping his face with his eyes, every pore memorized. He is so young and so old at the same time and because of everything that happened, he looks as if he is carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders right now. Dani is painfully aware that the burden is a big one for a 21 year old rider. After some silent hours, Dani opens his car window and fidgets with a completely rumpled box of cigarettes from his bag, struggling to light it with his one functioning hand. He sees Marc cringe and then finally leaning over to help him out with a hiss. "Here you go." Marc hands the lit cigarette back over. "I'd never do that if you didn't look so goddamn hot with those." Dani takes a relieved drag and with a quizzical look, turns his head towards the young rider. _Hot?? You never told me._ Close to Frejus, Marc stops for fuel and then parks at a motel. Dani raises his eyebrows notably, but Marc just shrugs. "It's either that or me driving the two of us against a tree or something smart like that. I am drained."  
Dani sighs and at the same time, feels strangely proud about Marc's sudden maturity. Sliding his sunglasses down, probably more for anonymity reasons, as it's twilight outside already, Marc grabs one of their bags and comes around to help Dani out of the car. The way to the reception is agony and the way to their room almost beyond his capacities. His entire body is covered in sweat when he is finally splayed on the bed. "That guy at the reception was really professional. He didn't bat an eyelid when I asked for a double." Marc yawns and sits down next to him and Dani feels a gentle hand running through his hair, drawing delicate lines on his temples. Dani relaxes into the touch, closing his eyes. Soon, he feels Marc's lips on his, Marc's tongue making its way past his lips. _God, I've missed that._ Softly, Dani moans into the kiss, the pain strangely distant now, as if Marc's caresses keep it away at arm's length. "I really need a shower," whispering ever so softly, Marc pulls away.  
"I want to join you." Shower sounds tempting, very tempting, to Dani and he realizes they both haven't since that race. It doesn't even matter at all... and that is special.  
"Okay... I think we have a tub, so maybe we can manage. I'll get the water running." Dani feels the mattress dip as Marc climbs out and leaves towards the bathroom. Alone at last, he carefully lets his mind wander through his body, head to toe, judging the state he's in, checking the pain levels. _Not quite better. I guess six hours in the car didn't help._ "Hey, are you asleep?" Dani's eyes fly open, blinking at first. Marc is standing next to the bed, in only his boxers and smirking at him, while Dani wishes he could just pull him down and have his wicked way with him. The gorgeous tan skin, glowing and covered in a sheen of sweat, the toned muscles that are twitching beautifully when he moves... only a couple of months ago Dani wouldn't have noticed any details, wouldn't have cared for a man's look at all - and now he's almost hard just from looking at Marc, who is still grinning devilishly when he speaks now, "Water is ready, should I help you undress?"  
"Yes, please." With Marc's help, Dani sits up on the edge of the bed and Marc drops to his knees in front of him to help him out of his shoes and socks and then motions to unbutton his jeans, his fingers brushing over Dani's bulge teasingly and Dani lets out a small moan, followed by a chuckle from the younger rider. With gentle and careful movements, Marc frees him from his shirt and helps him settle on his back again, Marc's tongue darting over his shoulders and throat, planting the softest kisses on his collarbones and his stomach, his fingers softly tracing the outline of the fabric around his ribs. "You think we can take that off?" Dani nods and with the help of a pocket knife - and Dani gasps at that but decides not to ask now -, Marc removes the bandage wordlessly. Dani sees him cringe at the sight of the bruises underneath but again, he doesn't say a thing, only leans down blow a tentative kiss on it. Then he moves to shove down Dani's jeans and boxers and Dani blushes a little when he hears Marc hum with surprise at his fully hard cock. Marc doesn't hesitate a second now, his lips closing around him, the wet hotness welcoming him. He is clutching to Marc's hair with all the force his good arm allows for, the pain zoomed far out by now and lust taking over completely. Even in his condition, even here, and even with the news he had to digest this morning and hasn't told anyone about, not even Marc, Marc's spell is still strong enough to make him melt.

_cúrame esta herida, por favor_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _please cure my wound_


	30. Sangre Hirviendo - Boiling Blood

When he had entered that somewhat cheap motel room, all Marc was thinking of had been going to sleep. And then there was Dani and suddenly, sleep is not an option anymore. Neither is a shower or a bath and he certainly doesn't care that the water will cool down. All that matters is the beautiful man under him squirming, panting and coming undone, his hand grabbing Marc's head relentlessly and holding him down with an astonishing force. Throughout the day, Marc has constantly been out of his mind, worrying incessantly about Dani's health. It's not like he hasn't seen him grit his teeth, hasn't heard him gasp for air and hasn't seen the sweat covering his face from all the exhaustion. It's just that he's been there before and knows that the last thing Dani would want is his pity, so he kept his mouth shut and watched with a bad feeling in his guts. Now however, Dani looks breath-taking when Marc lifts his head briefly, checking whether he is okay. Dani's head has fallen into the pillow, cheeks flushed, his upper body covered in a sheen of sweat, his legs slightly parted and his fingers still clutching in Marc's hair, urging him back down. He follows Dani's lead, lets his head bop up and down, his tongue swirling along Dani's cock and his face blushing at the obscene noises they are making. His fingers trail down Dani's thighs, some of the few parts of his body not covered in bruises, where Marc is not afraid to cause any further pain. Above his head, he hears Dani moan increasingly desperate, voice dropping lower. _He is close._ Marc doesn't want to tease now and has no intention to drag anything, Dani being vulnerable enough, so he picks up the speed, taking Dani in deeper with each move. He hears the needy and wanton whimper, feels the moment of unbearable tension and then Dani comes down his throat, his name echoing through the room and Dani's fingers finally releasing the grip on his hair. Marc's hand wraps around his own cock now, finishing himself off quickly and then lying down next to Dani, his head nuzzled against Dani's good shoulder. 

It's a moment of bliss, the afterglow pushing all of the issues, the fears, the problems far away, but it makes returning to reality all the more painful and Marc cringes when his breathing has steadied and he disentangles himself from Dani and the sheets. "I think I will just fill the tub again." He is about to get back up when he realizes that Dani will not let go of his wrist and he sits back down to gently turn Dani's face towards him. His heart has dropped and broken and shattered into pieces countless times these past 24 hours, but it hasn't gotten the least bit easier. He's facing Dani, sees him bite his lip, the tear-stained cheeks, Dani's eyes red and watery, evading his gaze and his world crumbles down yet again when he drops back on the bed, his lips on Dani's and his hands in Dani's hair. Helplessly, he mumbles every endearment into the smaller man's ear that he can think of, while Dani breaks down into a shuddering, sobbing pile of mess. _And I can't even properly hug you because I'd only put you in more pain._ Silent tears run over Marc's cheeks as well while he's trying to find a position to hold Dani without actually causing damage. He ends up propped up over him on his elbow, their foreheads against each other, his free hand clasped with Dani's and he just waits. He has long stopped mumbling sweet nothings and listens to the slowly softening noises of Dani's sobs, listens to the steadying of Dani's breath. Then, it's silent and the body beneath him is no longer shivering. _If I were you, I wouldn't want to talk about this now. And I think it's the same for you. Though I'd really like to know._ Marc tries disentangling himself for a second time and in this attempt, Dani lets go off him. He swallows down the lump in his throat and wills his voice to be casual. "So, I'll get the tub ready for us?" On Dani's face, he sees the wave of gratitude, so he knows he did the right thing and gets to the bathroom with a brief sigh of relief.

When he gets back to the bedroom, Dani has managed to push himself up into a sitting position and is smiling weakly at him. Weakly, but anyway, smiling. Wordlessly, Marc helps him up from the bed, steadying him on the way to the tub and supporting him when he makes it inside, releasing a low moan at the sensation of the hot water. "You can just rest the arm on the side, right? Or should I get a plastic bag?" Dani shakes his head.  
"It's all good." Marc cringes at the hoarse voice and reaches for a washcloth, sliding into the tub to kneel over Dani's legs. He is about to start washing him when Dani shakes his head determinedly. "Don't. It's- it's too much, okay?"  
 _Shit. Of course it is._ "Sorry." Kicking himself mentally, Marc drops the offending cloth and they just sit there, in complete silence, intense gazes locked. Marc sees fear in Dani's eyes, but he also sees determination and that is a promising sign. _He won't let this bring him down._ "Do you want to tell me what they said after the check-ups this morning?" Again, Dani is shaking his head. "Alright, but you know that I will listen whenever you want to talk, okay?"  
"Thank you." It sounds genuine.  
"It's getting cold, okay if we get out?" This time, Dani nods, so Marc gets out first, helps him along the way and Dani even lets him dry his skin, let's him wrap the small body that looks smaller and more lost than usual now, the huge cast sticking out inconveniently, in a towel and take him to bed. They both rest on their backs, heads to the ceiling, hands clasped between them.  
"Thank you," Dani's voice whispers softly into the darkness.  
"Don't. You'd do the same for me."  
"How did you manage that after your crash? Was it like this with you and Jorge?" Dani sounds pensive now, not angry or jealous, but Marc frowns anyway.  
"Not at all. It's never- " Marc swallows down a lump in his throat. "It's never been much about intimacy and it's never been much about healing. It was sharing our sorrows, yes, being angry together, yes. And then it's been about rough, and domination and having the upper hand, knowing you have control over something. Never about having someone to hold on to."  
"Oh."  
"Oh?" Marc raises his eyebrows although in the darkness, Dani won't see it.  
"I didn't realize."  
Marc coughs. "Are you jealous?"  
"Sometimes. Right now? Not anymore."  
"That's good." Marc presses a kiss to Dani's temple. "You shouldn't be."

_pierde el cielo equilibrio_  
 _cae derrumbado encima de tí_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _heaven is tumbling down_   
>  _it's collapsing over you_


	31. No Me Mires Asi - Don't Look At Me Like That

Dani wakes up first the next morning and repeats his internal body scan. _Less pain. Less pain is good._ He fishes for his phone, finally, scrolling through stuff for the first time since the crash. It's a challenge with one hand, but he is determined to figure it out. The number of missed calls is scary and he wonders if anyone talked to his parents, realizing that he actually forgot. And he had to call Alberto today. And possibly someone at Honda, or else, he'd have to ask Marc to call Santi. That would be even better. There's also hundreds of texts and he doesn't read a single one, just hitting the "delete all" button. Then, he connects to the hotel's wifi. _Heart attack in 3,2,1..._ The internet is full of them. All of them. The usual motorsport sites, newspapers, blogs, twitter, they are ruling all of it. He scrolls past the Pedrosa-Will he ever race again headlines and checks the interesting part. There's pictures of Marc, bike dropped to the gravel, leaning over him, of Marc yelling at the Marshals, of Marc squeezing himself into the Clinica Mobile relentlessly and Dani feels tears run over his face again because he still cannot believe he did that. _It's not just that he did it. He did it for me._ There's confused and concerned faces at the Honda box, a very serious Julia scratching his head and a picture of Alex and Marta, talking to Julia hectically. Dani raises an eyebrow. That is new. They'd talked in the pits already? He keeps going, sees Alberto and Emilio entering the hospital together _\- and really, that alone is giving us away, right? Our managers arriving together? Marc obviously in the hospital? We'll never hear the end of it if we try to deny that now. They'd only hunt harder to finally get a picture of THAT kiss._ He moves down the pages and sees Jorge and Clara, photographed in front of the doors, Jorge smoking and Clara on the phone, the caption wondering about Clara's identity and criticizing Jorge's vice. And he sees a car, dark windows, but from a sneaky angle, the people getting out in the garage have been caught. His heart jumps a beat when he clicks through the gallery and sees Vale and Nicky get out, followed by a picture of them where they are very obviously holding hands - the blogger in question even drew a red circle around it -, when they walk away. Yeah, well, they're not getting out of this either and Dani feels genuinely sorry for Nicky who he knows has little family support in this. _Though I'm not so sure that will be different for me either._ With all the speculations on his health and their relationships, the guessing on who Alex's and Jorge's girlfriends are, there's almost no room left for actual reactions to four of the best MotoGP riders apparently being gay. There's is astonishingly little discussion on that fact and he's positively surprised. It seems that right now, it's actually only important whether or not they have a relationship, not that such a relationship would be a gay one obviously. He reads past all the official "no comment" statements, sees the press release on him being seriously hurt but not critical, reads most of the other riders react with a stern "we hope Dani is better soon - and the rest is none of our business". And way to the end of the articles and posts, there are pictures of their rental car from yesterday and even one that caught Marc helping him get inside. _Seriously, how do they do that? We didn't even notice the buggers._ Contemplating, he stares at the phone display. It's not really bad, nothing to be actually scared of. Maybe besides his parents reaction but then, contrary to Marc, he's pretty old and grown up and shouldn't rely much on their approval. After all, the past years he hadn't done that either, hadn't presented each single girlfriend to have them agree or disagree with his choices and it shouldn't be different with Marc. The only thing that seriously and deeply worries him, is how they'll be chased by the media now. Hiding in the hospital's parking garage isn't quite playing by the rules. At least not Dani's rules. And his private life had always been private. _I wonder if I can ever have that again as long as I am with Marc._

Next to him, Marc is beginning to stir and with eyes full of affection, Dani watches him wake up. It's adorable, the ruffled hair, the crumpled face, the blinking of his sleepy eyes and then the moment where he actually sees him, his eyes lighting up and his lips curving up into a broad smile. Dropping the phone to the nightstand, Dani reaches out push some streaks out of Marc's forehead. "Good morning, sleepyhead!"  
Marc's smile grows even broader and he rolls over on his side, a hand gently on Dani's chest, the touch sending a brief shiver down the older man's body, culminating in a warm feeling that spreads through his guts. "Good morning. How are you feeling?"  
"Better." Dani carefully lifts his head a bit to press a brief kiss to Marc's lips. "You're a great nurse."  
"Of course," Marc snorts, "I always give 100% when I have a job to do. What did you do with that?" He's pointing to the dropped phone.  
"Checked the feedback." Marc raises an eyebrow and Dani continues, "It's not bad, I guess. Well, there's a picture of Vale and Nicky holding hands so for Nicky it's probably not going well personally, but the media and fan reaction is okay."  
"No bashing?"  
Dani shakes his head. "No, nothing. Loads of speculations, about us, Vale and Nicky, Clara and Marta, some pictures of Marta have already risen the question whether there's going to be a new Marquez soon."  
"Really? I thought it doesn't show very much?"  
"I guess you're almost still a teenager and don't know what to look for." Dani shrugs and chuckles at Marc's pout. "We should call Alberto and Emilio. And I thought, you might also talk to Santi. Fill them in on what we're doing, maybe cancel stuff."  
Marc's face goes serious straight away and he nods slowly. "Yes, we should. But only once we've safely made it to Barcelona, okay? We won't make it to the hospital today anyway, so I'll book us a room, right?"  
"Yes, okay. And I should probably tell them that we're coming first thing tomorrow morning?"  
" _We_ 're coming? You want me to go there with you?" Dani hears the disbelief in Marc's voice and chuckles.  
"I can't very well go on my own yet anyway and yes, I want you there. I don't want to be alone when -" He determinedly swallows down the beginning of a lump in his throat. "I want you there. After all, you're my favourite nurse now."  
Marc grins at him dirtily. "That's gotta be because of my unique methods of changing bandages then."

After a quick call to a small and decently private hotel in Barcelona, recommendation courtesy of Vale, they make a quick departure from the motel, leaving even without breakfast. It took him some communication skills, but Dani managed to convince Marc to just get coffee and croissants from the station and they share them straight from the bag, the crumbs making a mess in the car. "So glad it's rented." More crumbs fly out of Marc's mouth while he speaks, joining the ones already on the floor. Dani leans back in the passenger seat carefully, really feeling better than the day before and watching Marc with an affectionate smile. Everything about him is just amazing and it's hard to believe that it took Dani more than a year to realize it, that he never even guessed the hidden depth behind the juvenile enthusiasm and the easy going attitude, the broad smile and the open arms. _Never through the last year I have taken you seriously - as if you could have become MotoGP champion at 20 if you were truly the immature kid I wanted to see in you. You must have gone through hell in 2011 and it never even showed. I saw you on that stage in Valencia and I never even gave you credit for smiling through that. You've set the bar bloody high, Marc Marquez._  
"You're staring." Marc's words, spoken with a smile, wake him from his contemplation.  
"Sorry."  
"That's okay, I understand. I'm nice to look at." Marc's tongue pokes out and Dani can't resist and nudges the younger man's ribs.  
"Oww! While I consider it a great sign that you're regaining strength, I just want to remind you that if you break me as well, we won't have anyone capable of driving here."

The mood stays significantly lighter during today's drive and Dani gulps down a fair amount of painkillers to keep it that way, because obviously not having to grit his teeth through everything helps. They're making him drowsy though and he sleeps through the last hours, not noticing them crossing the Spanish boarder and only waking up in the parking lot behind the hotel when Marc starts tickling his nose and cheeks. They make it to the reception, where they are served discretely and perfectly, but they wouldn't have expected any less after Vale's recommendation and Dani is strangely proud of himself for making the complete way to their room without Marc's support. "Room service for lunch?" Marc is beaming at him expectantly.  
Dani chuckles, carefully sitting down on the bed with his back against the headboard. "Which do you love more, me or food?"  
With a vicious grin, Marc throws him the hotel's menu. "You better don't make me pick!" Then, the younger rider is joining him on the bed, propping himself up over him and their when their eyes lock, Marc's look is suddenly completely serious. _Amazing how you can go from 15 to 35 years in a split-second._ "I am so glad you're joking again." Marc's lips brush over his cheek, hot breath against his skin and Dani releases a soft moan. "And now pick something." Marc waves with the menu, childish mode back. "I'll start with the phone calls then."  
And while Marc explains their whereabouts first to Vale, then to Alex, then to Emilio and finally Santi, arranging on the way that after the clinic, they'd spend the week at his house, that all the team obligations should be cancelled for that time and that yes, they were okay and no, they would not comment yet and would inform everyone soon enough if, when and how they want to announce something. Dani watches and listens, fondly and impressed at the calm and organized way Marc does things. "Okay, I've done my share, now it's your turn, you'll have to deal with Alberto. I really love you to pieces, but I won't take that one." Marc takes the menu from him. "Have you chosen?" Dani shakes his head.  
"Just pick for me, okay?" Marc shrugs and takes the hotel's phone, while Dani tries to reach Alberto and explains all the things Marc has said before to his manager now.

He can hear Alberto cringe when he explains that they're spending the time until Aragon at Marc's place, but at least, he doesn't say a word about it.  
 _Dani, I mean... we have to announce something... you understand? You cannot keep hiding._  
"Yes, Alberto, I understand that we need a press conference." He sees Marc's head jerk around, seemingly finished with ordering food.  
 _But you didn't want to do it on Monday. And I just wanted to clarify-_  
"No, I don't _want_ to, but I _will_." He exchanges a look with Marc, a surprised and strange expression on the other's face.  
 _I was thinking maybe before the next race in Aragon? Or will you go to Switzerland?_  
"I won't. That's okay. Of course I will be there, I want to see him win." Marc's jaw drops at the words and Dani gives him a brief wink and a smile.  
 _So, I can arrange? Or is there another problem?_  
"No, if you speak to Emilio and Honda, that's good. Just arrange it. Maybe ask Vale and Nicky and maybe Jorge and Alex if they want to join." Two raised eyebrows and a very confused Marquez face stare at him, making Dani chuckle.  
 _Are you sure you want to make it a family reunion? It might look strange._  
"Well, I don't care if it looks like a freaking family party. It's not going to make it any less or more awkward and annoying."  
There's a deep sigh before Alberto's next answer. _Okay Dani. Take care, please. And let me know what the doctor said. And again, take care._ There's a brief pause before Alberto adds something, voice full of resignation but also warm and friendly. _Both of you, okay?_  
"I will, Alberto. You, too." He hangs up, locking gazes with Marc whose face shows changing expressions from happiness to shock.

"So, press conference in Aragon?" Marc's voice sounds tentative.  
Dani takes a deep breath and replies with a firm voice, "Yes, press conference in Aragon." They stare at each other wordlessly for a moment and both sigh with relief when the arrival of their lunch provides much needed distraction.  
They are eating, Dani picking on his food and Marc shoving it down, making Dani incredibly happy. _You're so adorable. Especially around food._ With his mouth still full and a muffled voice, Marc says, "So we've dealt with all of 'em right?" Dani nods and sees Marc swallow down the food and his expression change into something inscrutable. "Dani?" There's a tone in Marc's voice he really doesn't like.  
"Yes?"  
"What about your parents?" 

_Y sin embargo, yo te adoro_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _despite everything, I adore you_


	32. Vivir Sin Aire - Live Without Air

Dani hadn't really answered his question and Marc doesn't know what he should think about it, but he knows that Dani is old enough to make his own decisions about his family and he doesn't want the topic to ruin the rest of their day, so he lets it go. After deciding that they won't travel to Cervera on Wednesday but Thursday instead and booking the room for another night, they spend a lazy afternoon on the bed, alternating between naps and mindless TV, then order another room service meal for dinner and are both sound asleep before ten, the eventful days taking their toll now.

The next morning is a tense one then, both of them monosyllabic and reserved when they get up. They hardly speak a word until they've made it to the clinic's parking lot. Marc parks the car, takes the key and then their gazes lock, for the first time all morning and there's only one word to describe Dani's look: fearful. For Marc, it's heart-breaking and he is quick to lean over, wrap an arm around his neck and pressing his lips onto Dani's. "I'll be there." He breaks the kiss after a moment, searching for Dani's gaze again. "Are you ready?"  
"No." Dani shakes his head. _I understand... stupid questions. You'll never be ready for that._ "But we can go."

They don't even have to wait, they are allowed straight into the doctor's office and he enters the second where they've taken their seats. The conversation starts with meaningless chatter and Marc doesn't fail to notice that he's incredibly discreet, not even mentioning that Marc is in the room or looking at their hands, clasped tightly between the chairs. They've handed over a huge envelope full of pictures, x-rays, scans from Misano and a tense silence falls over all of them when the doctor studies them, his face inscrutable. Next to him, Marc can hear Dani swallow and he can feel the grip on his hand tightening by the second, while his own heart is thundering and pounding noisily and he feels cold sweat on his forehead. "So, Mister Pedrosa, what have you been told in Misano regarding the chances of your arm regaining full function?"  
Marc almost squeals because Dani's fingers are about to break his hand. "I was told," he hears Dani inhale sharply, "that it's not going to recover enough for motorcycling."  
In that moment, Marc's world stops turning. He stares at Dani's face in utter disbelief and shock, realizing what it was that Dani hadn't wanted to talk about the past days. Right now, seeing Dani feels to Marc like someone is ripping his heart straight out of his chest and tearing it into pieces. It's not emotional but pure physical heartache and it's so intense that he is willing to do anything to make it stop. He wants to hug and squeeze him, he would change places with him, he would study medicine to find a way to fix him, all just to make that pain go away from Dani's face and from his own heart. He swallows hard and has to blink a couple of times to suppress tears and then he notices that the doctor has actually started speaking and wills his mind to tune in to the words being said.  
"...from my perspective. I don't think that it would be wise to raise any hopes at the moment. What we can do is to wait a week and then make new scans to check how the healing process is going. Then we can consider if maybe, only maybe, a second operation could be considered useful to possibly repair the damage to the muscle."  
There's a lot of medical talking, most of which Marc doesn't understand and he doubts Dani does. In fact, he doubts that Dani is even listening and most likely, the doctor knows that, too, and he is just talking because he notices that both of them need a moment to process. Marc feels Dani's nails dig into his hands tighter once again and then he interrupts the long diagnosis with a weak and broken voice, "Will I race again?"  
Marc squeezes his eyes shut and he would love to cover his ears as well, because clearly, as long as he didn't hear it, it didn't happen. The doctor thinks a moment, then coughs and finally answers, "I don't want to make a prognosis at this stage, I am sorry. Come see me in a week and a half, the Monday after Aragon, and we will check." _It could have been worse. But it could have been a whole lot better, too._

They don't speak on the way back to the car and Dani doesn't let go of Marc's hand until he's sat in the passenger seat. Rubbing his stressed skin, Marc slides into the driver's seat. Instead of starting the engine, he faces Dani though, his finger gently wiping a tear from the older man's eyes. Marc has to bite his lip and swallow down a lump before he can speak. "Let me know when you want to talk, okay?" He sees Dani nod and although he is in physical pain from the realization, he acknowledges that there is nothing else he can do right now and starts driving them back to the hotel.  
It's painfully tense and silent in the car and on the way to their room and then inside their room as well. Dani steps out to the balcony wordlessly and through the window, Marc sees him carefully sit on the floor, lighting a cigarette. He frowns at the side and fishes for his phone, taking over the duty of sending text messages to Alex and Vale. They should call Alberto but Dani is in no state for that and Marc doesn't want to do it. Normally, he'd ask Alex or his dad, but they had their own problems to face, Marta's parents apparently being plain out obnoxious to deal with. Finally, he goes for Santi, who isn't overly excited at the prospect but who agrees anyway. With everything settled and nothing left to distract him with, Marc stares at the balcony. Dani hasn't moved or done anything besides finishing his smoke. _I KNOW there's nothing I CAN do but if I don't do anything I think I will just die from the pain of looking at you._

Marc slides to the floor next to Dani, scooping to close the gap between them and he feels Dani's head drop against his shoulder instantly. "How did you deal with it?" Dani is whispering so softly that Marc has to guess the words.  
"I don't really remember. Honestly. Lots of it disappeared under some haze. I think I cried a lot at night though." Marc shrugs and takes Dani's lighter, fidgeting with it.  
"I feel so numb right now."  
"I know. It's okay." Marc's fingers trail circles on Dani's forearm.  
"Can you just-" A gulp and a deep breath. "can you just hold me?"  
"I don't want to hurt you."  
"You won't." Marc is not really sure about that while he moves to straddle Dani, sitting on his thighs, arms around his neck. He is studying Dani's eyes carefully, looking for signs of pain. There are none though, instead, Dani just looks at him with genuine affection and it makes Marc's heart jump. "I love you, you know?"  
Marc nods, unsure where this is going and whispers, "I love you, too."  
And they sit there for a while, heads against each other and in a silence that despite the sadness feels somehow comforting. Marc feels Dani's breath against his cheeks, Dani's hand on the small of his back, under his shirt and his hands are running softly through Dani's hair. _It will be okay. I am sure it will be okay and you will race again and you will beat me on track dozens of times._

_Cómo quisiera poder vivir sin aire_  
 _Cómo quisiera vivir sin agua_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _how much I’d like to be able to live without air_   
> _how much I’d like to live without water_


	33. Le Bonheur Est Dans Tes Bras - Happiness Is In Your Arms

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess, it's PWP at its finest. There's only so much angst I can deal with over a couple of days ♥  
> Just skip it if you mind, it's not adding much to the storyline whatsoever ;)  
> A heads up just in case: I don't think there'll be another one in the morning. I'll probably need until tomorrow night. Sorry.

It is a long and silent afternoon that slowly fades into a long and silent evening. Dani has the intention to smoke an entire pack of cigarettes and they are on their second bottle of wine. Along with the painkillers, it makes Dani feel unsteady, floating somehow. But in a good way. He's assuming it must be similar for Marc, because they haven't eaten much all day. _That alone is a proof of love. Marc has picked me over food._ The thought manages to get a brief smile on Dani's lips. There's a point where it's getting darker and noticeably cooler outside and Marc gets them a duvet, wrapping both of them tightly, while the night falls down, the light vanishing into a comfortable obscurity, with a black sky and the light from the surrounding buildings. Then, Dani crosses the line where it just doesn't matter anymore, where his problems are so far away, that he doesn't even care anymore and past that line, there's only him, on the floor of a hotel balcony, with Marc on his lap and a blanket around them, their lips red from the wine and their breath hot against each other's skin. Marc has started stealing drags from his cigarettes, giggling at first but now with more contemplation and Dani understands, the realization striking like lightning, what's so hot about it, when he sees Marc hold the cigarettes between his slender fingers, his full lips drawing with that far-gone expression on his face, eyes almost shot. It looks like complete perfection and when Marc moves to do it once again, thin lines of smoke vanishing in the air around him, Dani takes the cigarette from him, their fingers brushing and he stubs it before he cups Marc's face with one hand and pulls him in for a kiss. He can taste tobacco and alcohol on Marc's soft lips and his veins are flooded with a wave of desire and lust, his only wish, his only thought is being as closely as possible entwined and entangled with Marc. Their lips and tongues grow greedier, rougher, until the taste of blood mixes with the wine and the cigarettes and when Dani's hand moves under Marc's shirt, his nails scratching over the younger man's back, they are both moaning into their kiss. In the obscure light, their eyes lock and Dani is stunned, once again, by the beauty in Marc's dishevelled, flushed face. There's a wordless understanding between them that has Marc dropping on his back and Dani following to lean over him, pushing himself up on one arm now. Their lips lock again and between their bodies, he feels Marc's hands, fidgeting clumsily with their belts and jeans, shoving their clothes down far enough so that their cocks rub against each other skin on skin, both of them panting and whimpering at the sensation. Tonight though, Dani thinks it's not enough, really not. He doesn't know if he can ask for it, doesn't know if it's okay for Marc, they haven't done it since that one night and he doesn't understand whether it should be his turn now first or whether it's something Marc enjoys very much at all. Yet, he is craving it and, his voice hoarse and breathless, he groans, "I want all of you."

Marc's eyes widen for an instant and Dani is not sure if he made a mistake, but then their expression changes back to desire, pupils darker than ever and Marc nods slowly. "Okay. Yeah, okay." Marc shuffles under him, kicking away his pants completely, tossing the blanket and then he grabs Dani, makes him sit up on his knees and Dani is too far gone to really process everything, but all over sudden Marc's ankles are on his shoulders and Marc is on display, right in front of him, and he is holding his fingers out to Dani, who just has no clue. "Lube." It's more a gasp than a word, but Dani finally understands, taking Marc's fingers into his mouth now, licking them greedily and with obscene noises. His fingers are gently smearing precome along Marc's cock, making the younger man squirm under him. _I can do this to you. I really can._ The sight in front of him is overwhelming, because once he has let gone of Marc's hand, Marc prepares himself, opens himself bit by bit. _For me. He's doing it for me._ Dani awes the focus and concentration on the younger man's face, his own cock achingly hard and itching with anticipation when Marc's hands wrap around his neck and pull him down. "Are you tested?" Dani nods slowly, his eyes locked with Marc's, admiring the way the younger man's pupils are sparkling. "Good, me too." It takes more effort with only one arm to hold him up but eventually Dani has himself positioned properly, Marc's hand guiding him to his entrance and he pushes inside eagerly, making Marc wince briefly. It is rougher than he intended to, but having waited for a felt eternity he cannot hold back as well as he wants to. All throughout, his eyes are on Marc's face, studying his expressions carefully, seeing the concentration and the initial pain, but then also the moment where lust takes over. And he feels it, too, because it's the instant where Marc begins pushing his hips back against him, meeting his thrusts. Dani knows it's been a bad idea altogether for his wrecked body, but he couldn't care less, immersed in Marc, tight muscles clenching around him, the most beautiful moans coming from Marc's mouth. Still, he is acutely aware that he cannot hold this position for too long and it makes his pushes rough and urgent, desperate for a timely release. The familiar electricity is building up inside him, hotness gathering and pressure accumulating. It's Marc's growl, a deep and vibrating "Dani, please" that pushes him over the edge with full force, a string of swears falling from his lips and he vaguely notices the hot liquid between them, indicating that Marc came as well, before he lets himself sink to the floor, rolling on his back. He's panting heavily and so is Marc, who cuddles up against his good side, pulling the blanket over both of them.  
Dani runs his hand through Marc's hair absentmindedly, his thoughts not fully coherent yet and he can feel Marc relax against his fingers. "Thank you," he whispers, turning his head to steal a kiss from the young man, who is returning it gently before pulling back and looking at him, eyes full of that affection that has fascinated Dani right from the start.  
"Don't thank me. I love you."

_emmène moi pour me montrer comme on peut tout oublier_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _take me with you to show me how to forget everything_


	34. Fe - Faith

They motion to get into their bed eventually, the air feeling too cool and the need for sleep overwhelming. Marc watches Dani walk inside in front of him, marveling the perfect body and cringing at the bruises on his hips, slightly visible where his shirt is pushed up. _It's unbelievable what you just did._ Marc drops the duvet and their jeans on the floor carelessly and helps Dani to get rid of his shirt, softly kissing his shoulders, his hands brushing over Dani's sides and he feels the smaller man shiver under his touch. Quickly, he sheds his own shirt and then they crawl under the sheets, limbs tangled, heads nuzzled with each other's. "I love you, too." Marc hears the soft whisper, Dani's voice muffled by the pillow and his hair and the words make a warmth spread through his entire body. He wonders how this feels for Dani, how _they_ feel for Dani and if the older man has finally accepted his feelings for another man. _I guess you've answered me that one tonight. Couldn't be more demanding I think._ For the first time since Sunday, Marc drifts away without a single thought of the accident and it's pure bliss, going to sleep without a single tear shed on the pillows.

Marc is the first to wake up the next morning and with the early rays of sun flooding the bedroom - they hadn't been in a state of mind where you remember to close curtains last night - he takes a moment to draw in the sight next to him, Dani splayed out on his back, sheet loosely tangled around his legs. His bronze chest is heaving up and down regularly, his lips are slightly parted, disobedient streaks of black hair are spiking up from his head and most importantly, his face is entirely peaceful. Not the slightest hint of worry or discomfort. It's truly amazing, because this is happening rarely with Dani and Marc absentmindedly props his chin up on his hands, his lips curving up into a soft smile. It's the loud growling of his stomach that disturbs him in his meditation on his beautiful boyfriend and apparently, it's been loud enough to wake Dani as well, because the smaller man is definitely stirring now. Marc keeps smiling at him, loving the way he blinks, the way his eyes open with a hint of confusion that's immediately replace by affection. "Morning. I think you are staring," Dani croaks, the grin on his face telling that he really doesn't mind.  
"I am starving." Marc grins back and runs a hand through Dani's hair.  
"Ow. I just thought I had won the battle for your attention against food yesterday." Dani chuckles.  
"That was yesterday. Now is a different day and I need food. Wanna grab some on the road?" Marc pushes himself up, looking down at Dani enthusiastically.  
"Okay. But we have to take clean up and pack first. And I need a painkiller."  
Marc cringes. "Because of yesterday?"  
"No, I don't think that made it worse. But I still need one." Dani starts rummaging on the nightstand.  
"Okay, you know what? I'll just go shower first. Because if we go together, we'll never check out on time." He gets up from the bed, noticing that in fact, he could use a painkiller after _that_.  
He tries his best to hide it from Dani, teeth gritting and walking as steadily as possible. He has almost made it into the bathroom, when he hears Dani's shocked voice behind his back. "I hurt you."  
"It's okay."  
"No, it's not."  
Marc turns around, makes a step towards the bed, gets on his knees and kisses Dani, before he firmly locks eyes with the older man. "Yes it is. I wanted that at least as much as you. I'd never had dared to ask, especially not with your injury and I'm blown away by the fact that you did. Every second of it was amazing and I would do it again and again and again right here and now. You understand that?"  
"Yes, I think I do."  
Dani presses a peck to his cheek and Marc goes back to the bathroom, in the doorframe turning his head towards Dani and cheekily adding, "But first, I want food."

They make it to the road, another bag of croissants between them, adding crumbs to the floor of yet another rental car. It's an easy drive, one without much tension and that's strange enough, Marc thinks, because normally the thought of bringing home a boyfriend, especially _this_ boyfriend should be freaking him out. Surprisingly, he's really calm and, that's maybe even more surprising, so is Dani. _Maybe it just means that after the past days we're invincible? Because that would be really a great thing to take out of all this._ They chat about this and that, mainly mindless things time passing quickly and then Marc is pulling into his family's driveway. That's when the tension finally does mount, both of them hesitant to get out. "Remember last time?" Dani whispers. Marc nods. Oh yes, he does. Waking up next to Dani in his bed, that had been one of the best and scariest moments in his entire life. He is about to reply something, when his mother steps out of the door, arms wide open, huge smile over her face.  
Marc exchanges a last quick glance with Dani. "Ready to face it?"  
"Yes, I'll love it." Dani squeezes his hand and then they're doing it, they're meeting his family as a couple.  


With lots of relief, Marc watches his parents welcoming his boyfriend. He's somewhat proud and a slight bit surprised just how easily they accept them and seeing Dani's reaction, blushing adorably, insecure smile, stuttering, makes Marc chuckle - in a very fond way. He loves every second of it - until his mother starts calling him "baby" in front of Dani and he feels his own cheeks turn pink and sees Dani wink at him devilishly. They hardly have enough time to get their bags into Marc's room before they're called down for lunch. "I hope you don't mind that we won't have much time for ourselves here?" Marc suddenly feels self-conscious about pretty much everything. After all, Dani is grown up with an own house and he's now forcing him to stay in his childhood bedroom on 24 hour surveillance of his parents. It seems that Dani doesn't care though, as he's leaning in for a kiss now and then looks at him with the cutest smile.  
"Don't worry, they're awesome and I'm really flattered that I'm considered family already. And now, let's go down, I know you're hungry. Plus, I'm excited to see Alex and Marta."

During lunch, Marc notices with amazement, how everyone just plain out ignores Dani's injury, not one of them asking about the doctor's appointment, instead exchanging lots of chatter on neighbors and his parents' friends. Alex and Marta look great and it's comforting to see, the two of them exchanging coy smiles and their hands brushing. _Maybe you do feel more for each other than you thought._ From all he can tell at the table, Marta's stomach has grown a fair bit over the past days - and he wonders whether that's even physically possible or whether maybe he's just seeing it now because he knows. It's Dani who finally asks about the baby and Marc's heart jumps when he sees Alex's and Marta's hands lace and his brother's face beam when Marta tells them that she is better now and that they'd been to the doctor's yesterday as well and the baby is doing great.  
"Do you have a picture?" Dani sounds genuinely curious and Marta and Alex nod.  
"You have a picture? Seriously? I want to see!" They have a picture and haven't even shown him, Marc is beyond excited while Alex starts rummaging. _I'll see my nephew. I will really see a picture of my nephew._ And he takes the small piece of paper from Alex and stares at it with wide eyes, Dani leaning over to see as well and between them, he feels Dani's hand clasp his while they're watching with their heads against each other. "It's perfect," Marc lets out breathlessly, amazed and overwhelmed. It's already a fully grown human, not one of those black spots that you cannot recognize until someone explains. It's complete and real and beautiful.  
And beside him, he hears Dani whisper, "It's really like a miracle." He feels him squeeze his hands and when he looks up, Marta and Alex are beaming at them, his mother is wiping a tear from her eyes and even his father is smiling broadly. It's like arriving in a safe harbor, like they make everything just that bit more bearable and Marc hasn't felt this good about coming to Cervera in a long time. _I am home. No, we are home. Finally._

_Dame fe, dame alas,_  
 _dame fuerza_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _give me faith, give me wings, give me strength_


	35. At My Most Beautiful

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I wasn't going to update until tomorrow morning and this wasn't quite on the agenda at all. Or at least, it was going to end quite differently. Let's call it equilibrium ;) (or defiance ♥)  
> (This *is* the morning update then, there'll be a new one tomorrow night and it will probably be late because tomorrow is dirt track day ♥)

Dani loves their stay at Marc's house. It's nothing he expected, but now that they're here, it's the most natural thing in the world. Marc's family has basically adopted him the second he set a foot on their driveway and he's thankful, flattered and amazed. Throughout the days, everything has been smooth and easy, nobody pressuring him into anything. They've even been considerate enough not to mention his injury once so that for a large part, he manages to ignore it as well. Along with Marc, he had followed the coverage and rumors about whatever they were having with or without each other had not stopped, but so far, there still hasn't been any open critcism on the nature of their relationship. Alberto had briefly announced to them that he is preparing the conference for the Thursday before Aragon but he hasn't invited anyone yet. Vale and Nicky let them know that the weather in Italy is awesome and that they're enjoying themselves and Jorge and Clara send a cheer up message from Mallorca. In Cervera now however, on Saturday afternoon, Marc busy playing soccer with Alex, Julia has asked Dani to have a seat out on the terrace with him. Dani fears the worst, his guts twisting nervously and his heart throbbing painfully. And the way Julia looks at him now, casually handing him a bottle of beer, is very serious. "So, you and Marc?"  
"Yes," Dani swallows. "Me and Marc." Their chairs are next to each other and they're both staring forward, watching Alex and Marc playing on the grass. Dani feels so glad he doesn't have to look into Julia's eyes during this.  
"You are serious about this, right?"  
Dani really wants a cigarette now but that could ruin the impression, he thinks and just nods. "Yes, I am."  
"I know." Dani's head jerks around and Julia gives him a brief smile. "I've known and seen you all those years. You don't turn gay overnight for some almost-still-a-teen-guy because you want some fun. I'm honest, Dani, I don't really understand how or why the two of you match, but one look at you together tells me that you simply do."  
"Thank you?" Dani is not sure if that's the right answer or if there's even been a question.  
"Just take care of both of you, okay?" Julia raises his bottle with a sincere look. "I promise." Dani feels strangely solemn when he says it and they clink their bottles and finish their drinks, both contemplating over Alex and Marc. Dani has no idea how it must feel for Julia, seeing them there. How does it feel to see them act so childish about their game, squeaking and yelling through it, both equally enthusiastic and at the same time, knowing that one of them is going to be a father soon and the other is the youngest MotoGP champion in history? Marc lets out a loud squeal, having scored a goal and Dani claps with a cheeky smile, his eyes resting on Marc's perfect body. He's only wearing shorts and his bare chest is covered in sweat, his hair sticking to his head messily. It's beautiful. _But then, you're always beautiful._ Dani is almost shocked when Julia suddenly holds a pack of cigarettes under his nose and he doesn't know whether he can accept the offer or not.  
Julia chuckles. "Dani, you're 28. I won't mind. And it's my vice as well, so don't worry." Dani gladly accepts and they smoke together, silently bonding over their mutual affection for the sight in front of them.

After a while, two heavily panting Marquez brothers turn up in front of them, both casually opening their own bottles of beer, panting heavily, sweat dripping over flushed cheeks and chests and for an instant, Dani just wants to jump at Marc - but even the most accepting parents certainly had boundaries.  
"So, who won?" Julia cringes briefly at Alex's beer, but then clinks bottles with him anyway.  
"I did," Alex presses out.  
Marc just huffs, "Yeah, but only because you knocked me down."  
And with an ease that only exists between brothers, they get into a fight, chase each other over the terrace and only end when Marc has Alex pinned to the floor.  
"It must have been a challenge raising those two," Dani mumbles pensively.  
Next to him, Julia chuckles briefly. "Oh yes, it was. But the most beautiful challenge I ever accepted."

Dani naps, painkillers and beer not making a good combination, while Marc takes a shower and later, they have dinner together, Roser and Marta reappearing from the kitchen with something best referred to as a feast. With the first clouds of a huge thunderstorm piling up in the sky, they're eating outside, in a comfortable silence and with stolen kisses and cheeky glances, with feet that nudge under tables and with smiles that could light up even the darkest winter day. For Dani, it's all a bit under a haze, the effect of the drugs only wearing off slowly and his general mood being rather floating right now. When he had agreed to join Marc here, he'd done it mostly because he had been clinging to Marc, but now that he's here, he's falling for the entire atmosphere more and more, feeling a sense of unconditional family bond that he doesn't have at home. And later, when everybody is full and even Marc has finished desert, the thunder growling in the distance, everybody starts leaving, Roser and Julia taking over the kitchen, Marta going to sleep and Alex driving off to meet a friend. They're left by themselves and Dani finally asks Marc something he's meant to ask him since they arrived. "Would you play for me again?" Marc's eyes widen and he blushes.  
"Now?"  
"I don't know... if you don't mind, yes. Please?" Dani tries his puppy eyes and he sees Marc smirk.  
"I see what you're doing there." Marc playfully nudged his head and Dani feigns indignation. Then, the younger rider sighs and throws him a resigned look. "But okay, I will."  
And he does, and Dani loses himself in the image in front of him, Marc in black boxer briefs and a white V-neck, playing for him. It's a replica of _that_ day, a gorgeous replica and it reminds him that driving here had probably been the best decision he's made in his life.

Dani carefully scoops onto the stool, his head against Marc's shoulder and his eyes reveling in the way Marc's fingers run over the keys. After a while, the piece comes to an end and Marc presses a kiss to his hair that sends a shiver from Dani's scalp to the tip of his toes. "Did you like it?"  
"I loved it, you're really good. Is it Chopin?"  
He hears Marc make an impressed hum. "Raindrop prelude, yes." Dani's fingers trace a line down Marc's forearm and outside, they hear the thunder coming near, rain starting to splatter against the windows.  
Roser's head pops through the doorframe. "Hey, boys, we're going upstairs. Goodnight and lock the door before you go to bed!"  
"We will, goodnight!"  
Marc gets up and pulls Dani along, guiding him to the sofa and sitting down to watch the thunderstorm rage. Marc is cuddled up against him and wrapping them with the blanket. "Your family is really, really awesome."  
"Yes, they are. They always make me happy." Marc pauses briefly and then looks up to him through his lashes, broad smile on his face. "Just like you."

_at my most beautiful_  
 _I found a way to make you_  
 _I found a way, a way to make you smile_


	36. Lluvia Al Corazon - Rain To The Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...finally, making it to Aragon... this might exceed 93 chapters if it moves this slowly *shrugs*  
>  Don't know about the next update, maybe morning, maybe tomorrow night :/  
> AND: A huge thank you for the feedback and hits and kudos and just everything on this! Means the world to me and makes me smile and jump with joy ♥ ♥ ♥

"I want to kiss you in the rain." Marc's lips brush Dani's ear, his tongue flicking over delicate skin and he feels Dani's grip around his wrist tighten, hears the soft and content moan.  
"Kiss me in the rain? Like in _Matchpoint_?"  
"Well, not all the way. I don't think. But kiss you, in the rain, yes." Then, unexpected for Marc, Dani almost jumps from the couch, pulling him along and he stares at the smaller man in utter confusion.  
"Let's do it." Dani tugs on his hand and Marc's eyes dart back and forth between the splashing rain and Dani's face, on which he sees a look of surprising enthusiasm. _I don't think I've ever seen you this spontaneous. But I think I like it._  
"Okay," Marc nods and they almost run outside, hands clasped and both chuckling. The weather is simply horrible, storm hauling, rain pouring and still thunder growling and it may not be the smartest idea they've had, but it's sure one of the hottest, Marc thinks to himself when they're standing there, both instantly soaked, his arms around Dani's neck and Dani's hand on his ass, both shivering from the cold and Dani's face gorgeous. He cannot see everything in the dim light, but he can see the drops of water running over Dani's face, the sudden glow in the older man's eyes and he feels the tension mount between them, before their lips collide to the sound of yet another thunder. With Dani's nails clawed to his back now and his hands in Dani's wet hair, their tongues and teeth hit and grit, once again the taste of blood mixing with the taste of Dani, cigarettes and beer. He briefly hopes that this won't cause problems with Dani's cast and then the smaller man jerks his hips forward, his bulge unmistakably large and Marc's mind goes blank. They stand out there devouring each other until they are both freezing and at the same time bursting with desire and then end up on one of the recliners under the roof of the terrace, rutting against each other like desperate teenagers and coming in their underwear without even blushing. They are giddy when they go upstairs in Marc's room, taking a bottle of wine along with them and leaving wet spots everywhere and Marc's mind is still so far gone that he doesn't even think about his mother's reaction to that. In his room, he dries both of them gently and then they cuddle up under the duvet to warm their frozen bodies, backs against the headboard, bottle of wine travelling between their hands and they talk almost all night about more and less meaningful things until they fall asleep, the bottle dropped to the floor and Dani wrapped around Marc's chest closely.

And then the days until Aragon just trickle between their fingers and suddenly, it's Wednesday and they're at the hotel bar, sharing drinks with Nicky and Vale. The atmosphere is tense and quiet. They don't speak much and when they do, the subject of the next day is avoided carefully. It's Nicky, who - and he would have been the last Marc would have guessed - puts his glass on the table and raises his voice, "So, are you ready for tomorrow?"  
Marc swallows and exchanges a look with Dani, who looks a bit like a wound deer. _You haven't even told your parents. Seriously._ Vale just shrugs. "You know what, kids? I am sure that these journalists are just as scared of us as we are of them."  
"We?" Dani raises an eyebrow. "Are you saying you're scared, too?"  
"Si. Sure." Marc is astonished that Valentino actually looks serious. Off track, that is a rare sight. "Of course I am. If it were easy, I would have told the world years ago."  
They fall back into silence, nerves failing all around and they call it an early night. Only on the way to the elevator does Marc realize that they'd pretty much just had a double date in public. And they hadn't bothered and hadn't been bothered. _Maybe it's so much easier than we think?_  
"Dani?" They've made it back to their room and are both ready to go to bed.  
"Hm?"  
Marc takes a deep breath. "I think you should call your parents."  
Dani stares at him with a frown and a dropped jaw and Marc almost regrets that he said it, that he interfered with Dani's private life, but only almost, because in fact, he is a part of Dani's private life now and he doesn't like to be revealed to his boyfriend's parents as such during a press conference. "I don't think that'll be a good idea." Dani's voice is hoarse.  
"Well, do you think them hearing it via media announcements will make it better?" Marc tries to sound as soft as possible and Dani is looking at him with those lost puppy eyes that he cannot bear seeing at all.  
"I don't know what to say. And they might not..." Dani inhales sharply now and Marc holds his breath. "They probably won't react like your parents at all and I am actually quite embarrassed about that, especially after your family took me in with arms wide open. And I don't want you to feel unwelcome. Because they will make you feel like that."  
 _Oh. I kind of suspected that, but it still hurts a bit. They could at least try to get to know me._ Marc bites his lip now, but then he decides that he shouldn't care and just shrugs. "You know what? I don't care. As long as I am welcome in your house and in your arms, the rest won't matter." Marc gently nudges Dani's side, avoiding the parts where ribs are broken. "So, go ahead, please. I really don't want them to hear it on TV."  
Their eyes lock, intense looks exchanged, before Dani reaches for his phone. "I'll do it. For you. But I'll get out on the balcony, okay?" Marc nods and his eyes follow Dani's back - maybe more Dani's ass in tight black boxer briefs - stepping out. Through the windows, he sees him light a cigarette and lean over the railing, mouth moving. _He's already talking to them._ Marc's heart is beating nervously now and time crawls while he sits there on the bed, legs crossed, eyes on Dani. Briefly he realizes that Honda had booked them a double without even discussing it and he makes a mental note to thank Santi, whom he is sure had been the driving force behind that.

Dani comes back inside after about half an hour and Marc's heart just stops beating altogether when he walks towards the bed, face inscrutable and dropping the phone carelessly. Marc watches him lay down carefully, teeth still gritting at the pain. Then, he's spread on his back next to him and Marc reaches for Dani's hand, lacing their fingers. "So?"  
He feels Dani squeeze his hand. "You know, they don't really like it."  
"How bad is it?" Marc is croaking.  
"Let's just say we won't have a family dinner with them anytime soon." Biting his lip, Marc swallows down the lump in his throat.  
"Are you okay?" He turns his face towards Dani but the older rider keeps staring to the ceiling.  
After a while, Dani answers, his voice contemplative and distant, "I think it doesn't matter to me. I don't know if you can even understand, but with my parents it's never been the way it is at your house. It's always been a bit more... reserved, I think. So it doesn't really make a difference now. We rarely met during the past years, we will rarely meet the next few years." For now, that's all he's going to hear from Dani, Marc can sense it in the other man's voice and he just rolls to his side, again cuddling up against Dani under the sheets, his head nuzzled against Dani's shoulder, feeling Dani's pulse and heartbeat and drifting to sleep surprisingly quickly despite the prospect of what is probably the most difficult press conference they've done in their lives.

_pero todo tiene alivio_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _but everything has relief_


	37. Tender

The room is bursting with palpable tension and there's a distinct murmuring along the journalists while they are waiting for them to say something. Dani laces his fingers with Marc's and nudges his leg with his knee and he knows that Nicky and Vale have their hands clasped under the table as well. At their side, standing against the wall, he sees Alberto and Emilio with resignation in their faces, Santi and Uccio smiling encouragingly and Julia, winking at them. He swallows. This is going to be it. There's no going back after today and the thought is freaking him out, making him want to run and hide, his throat going dry and his hands sweaty. Next to him, Marc inhales sharply, coughs briefly and then, it starts.

_"We, the six of us have made the decision to explain ourselves. We will do no more and no less than that and we hope that everybody understands, and respects, that this is only an announcement and not a round of question and answer. We also threw a coin, and actually, I will start. I am in a relationship with my teammate, Dani Pedrosa. We don't think it's anybody's business but ours and we don't want to comment on it. Only this much, we are old enough to distinguish between on and off track, Honda trusts us in this and we are, despite the circumstances, very happy."_

_"Okay, my turn. I am, as most of you assumed already, in a relationship with Nicky Hayden. As Marc said, all of us can separate racing from our private life enough, we have discussed things with our teams and we don't want to discuss our private life in front of cameras."_

_"I would like to add a message to my family and all those who think the same way. This is not a matter of provoking anything or anybody. You don't have to accept our relationship, we don't give a damn about your approval, but we demand that you respect us as riders and as people."_

_"Along the way, I've been pictured with a gorgeous young lady who doesn't want me to say her full name here because she would prefer her life to remain private. And it is true that I knew about my fellow riders' relationship and no, I do not care."_

_"I am going to be a father in January. That much about me. And as Jorge said, I knew and I didn't and don't care."_

_"Well, it's final words for me, I guess. I am not racing here and won't be for the rest of the season. I'll undergo further testing and we hope that I will be back for winter testing. And yes, I am very happy with Marc."_

There's murmuring, flashlights, people yelling questions, but Dani only notices under a haze. They're all getting up already, walking out and he knows Alberto or Emilio will take over the duty of getting the press out without any further statements. _Well, they earn a fair amount of money with the job._

For something that Dani expected to be the most life-changing moment he has gone through and that would and should also feel like a living hell to be in, it is over astonishingly quick. _A bit like ripping off a giant band aid._ And now, he is sitting back in a hotel room, by himself and while the fact that he is now officially in a gay relationship leaves him strangely unaffected, the reality of him not racing this season sinks back in slowly but relentlessly. Along with the painful, twisted feeling in his guts that tells him there's a real possibility that his last race has already taken place. The prospect of sitting through the left races like this, it's weighing him down, overpowering him, breaking him. He passes the day between restless pacing, smoking more than a pack of cigarettes on the balcony, ordering a room service meal that he hardly even picks on and watching TV coverage that shows him his beautiful boyfriend beating everybody else with his usual ease. He is not jealous, in his eyes, Marc's deserves it all and more. And he is truly proud, proud to be his teammate, proud to be his boyfriend, proud to be his companion. Still, it's difficult to watch, painful to endure, shattering his heart. Because all of it would only be perfect if he was there, in the pit, if it was him patting his shoulder now, him who pulls the young man into a hug. Dani goes through a full range of emotions over the course of the day, screaming, yelling, sobbing, crying, pleading. He tries it all and nothing helps against the feeling of having hit rock bottom - with no chance back up. Until there's a familiar sound in front of the door, a sound that makes his heart jump and his head jerk up from the bed, his hand hastily wiping away the rest of his tears.

Marc enters, beaming at first, but freezing on a spot the second their eyes meet and Dani knows that no matter how hard he pretends that he is fine now, Marc can see right through him. And while he truly thinks that Marc would deserve and need a relaxed evening right now, he cannot help feeling very lucky that Marc has the gift to understand him right now. Because right now, the young rider is dropping everything right where he stands to walk over to Dani, pulling him in for one of those gentle hugs that he goes for since the crash, his arms loosely around Dani's shoulders, their foreheads touching. And Dani is shivering and shuddering under the touch, torn between wanting to cry and wanting to bend Marc over the next counter when he hears him whisper, "You will race again. I know you will."

_come on, come on, come on, love's the greatest thing_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I've used the song before. It's called recycling and it's good for the environment ;)


	38. Deshacer El Mundo - Unmake The World

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Might need a tissue alert? I don't really know though. For me, it's been tough to write so I guess I better warn. ♥

Marc feels as if he is carrying the weight of this world on his shoulders when Dani looks at him like this, with that wound-deer-look that's always so heart-breaking. At some point during the evening, after cuddling and eating and discussing telemetry, however, the look on Dani's face changes, gets back to his normal self and it's then that Marc suddenly feels light and floating and perfect. They call it an early night and then end up talking in bed half of the night, like school children staying over at each other's house. And on Friday morning, they decide that Dani comes along to the track, because really, it doesn't matter anymore. Everybody knows and they can just basically give them what they're looking for. Marc isn't sure whether Dani will really do okay, being so close to everything - he had hated it when he had been injured and went to support Alex - but from what he understands, Dani felt worse in front of the TV, felt as if he should be there with him and he is strangely proud that Dani wants to be there with him. Surprisingly, it really works well, again confirming his suspicion that the whole coming out thing will be much less spectacular than they expected. Of course, there are tons of gasping headlines and articles, but in their everyday life, nothing has changed. People try to take pictures, yes, but they've done so before. And only because occasionally someone screams "Kiss for us" they will not have to worry. The other riders and team members also treat them pretty much as usual. Well, some act a bit pitiful towards Dani, but that's because of the injury, Marc hopes with a cheeky grin, not because they feel sorry for Dani for dating him. And Marc could get used to the stolen kisses in the back of the garage, could get used to Dani's fond smile whenever he's done well. He could get used to reward-blowjobs in his motorhome when he scores a pole position and most certainly, he could get used to the feeling of jumping of his bike, full of the adrenaline of knowing he'd just won a race and the first way being into Dani's arms.  
There are two topics though that they have avoided decisively over the weekend. The first is the fact that after basically being AWOL for two weeks, at least Marc would have to return to testing and media events this week, followed by his departure for overseas races and with Dani not in a state for constant travel, that meant they'd have to split - for the first time since Dani had appeared on Marc's doorstep. They're both amazed at the realization that they've spent every night together since then. But even with their best negotiations and after long discussions with Emilio and Alberto, their deadline would be Wednesday, when Marc was expected to go to Japan. Dani had gladly accepted the Marquez family's offer to spend the meantime at their house and Marc iss happy he'd done so because it would have worried him if he'd been by himself after... well... after the second topic they'd avoided so carefully: Monday's doctor's appointment.

It's the reason why they're currently back in Barcelona, same hotel, same room, waiting for the inevitable. Marc is sitting in a corner of the balcony, arms around his legs, head propped up, watching Dani, who is flat on his back, staring into the black sky and smoking one cigarette after the other. It's one of those moments where talking quite clearly is neither necessary nor appropriate. In Marc's head, worries, fears and best case versus worst case scenarios chase each other relentlessly and they make him dizzy, they overwhelm him. The weight of the world seems to be back on his shoulders, the familiar feeling that someone is cutting into his heart has returned when he looks at Dani, every fiber of his body aching and yearning to do something, anything and everything to make it better. And the knowledge, from his own experience, that there is really and truly nothing he could do is slowly breaking him apart.  
It's a tiny, hidden part of his brain that takes in the gorgeous sight though, that focuses on Dani's entire beauty, splayed out in front of him, the slender body, the tight, dark jeans and the light blue shirt making his skin look even more wonderfully tanned, the muscles of his chest and stomach visibly under the thin fabric, the steady heaving of his chest, the pensive face, the way his full lips close around the cigarette and exhale those flurries of smoke. Every detail he maps, carefully and with concentration, trying to store images in his head that will last him for the gruesome weeks without Dani, a time he deeply fears. He's grateful that his parents have, without much ado, just basically ordered the other to stay at their place, along with Marta who is not allowed to fly either, so that both of them will be watched over properly. It's a bit of relief, a ray of light in an unusually dark future.

Stubbing another cigarette, Dani's good hand reaches for Marc's and he follows the older man's lead without hesitation, lets himself be pulled down, wrapped against the hot body, his head on Dani's chest, allowing him to hear every heartbeat. Dani's hand is in his hair, making him melt under the touch. "I love you."  
Marc props himself up and presses a kiss on Dani's lips before he replies, "I love you two. You know that, right?"  
Under him, Dani nods slowly and then, with a hoarse voice, the older rider whispers, "I need you to show me."  
It's a sentence that not only breaks his heart, it also reaches straight to his groin and Marc nods, like hypnotized and gets up. _Because we pay for that bed and this time, we're going to use it._ He carries Dani inside, careful to not hurt his ribcage and amazed at the light body in his arms. On the bed, he splays him, like a religious offering, he thinks, contemplating the beautiful image of Dani against the immaculate white sheets. He sheds his own clothes quickly and matter-of-factly, before he leans down to undress Dani with as much tenderness as possible. He frees him from the shirt first and he takes his time to cover every inch of skin, from throat to navel with licks and kisses, tentatively nibbling on Dani's nipples and sucking a tiny bruise on his Adam's apple. All throughout, Dani's hand is in his hair, clenched tightly but not painfully and he notices Dani's squirming, his breathing becoming more shallow and he hears Dani's soft whimpers when his fingers trace a delicate line over Dani's side.  
Marc's fingers gently continue their path, moving under Dani's waistband, shoving his jeans and boxers down inch by inch, his tongue caressing every part of Dani's legs that he can reach. When Dani is finally naked in front of him and he's taken a moment to make a mental note of the glorious view, his fingers draw a line up the inside of Dani's legs from his feet to his lap and it makes Dani yelp and his hips jerk up, cock hard already, body shivering. Marc is painfully aroused himself and he craves to bury him inside Dani, but at the same time knows that it couldn't be a worse moment for that. His tongue slides up Dani's cock now and Dani's hand returns to clench in his hair, grabbing it roughly. "Marc, please." He feels Dani's hips buck up and with a smile, allows his tongue to swirl around Dani's length, teasingly slow, making the other growl and plead. Marc is grinning when he finally swallows Dani down, looking up at him through his lashes, finding Dani's face adorably blushed and already unraveled, guards swept away entirely. _This will never cease to amaze me._ He's become an expert at reading the little and big signs of Dani's desire by studying his reactions closely over the past weeks and so he feels Dani zone out underneath him, feels the buildup of tension in all of his muscles and he's prepared when the older rider comes down his throat, moaning his name loudly. It's the possessive way he says it, his hand still clutching to Marc's hair, that makes him stumble towards the edge, falling over after a few tugs on his own cock, following Dani into the beautiful state of oblivion where only their mutual panting and the feeling of their sticky, sweaty skin against each other's exists. They fall into a deep sleep, without even cleaning up their mess, Marc barely managing to drape a duvet over their spent bodies.

The next morning is another speechless one and even Marc doesn't feel like breakfast this time. He drives them to the hospital and much like the last time, their hands clasp on the way inside, tightly and closely and not going to break apart unless a check absolutely requires it. Again, the staff and doctors are professional enough to not even mention Marc's presence and he follows Dani everywhere, because as long as Dani is holding on to his fingers with such despair, he will not leave him alone. Marc's heart is beating relentlessly, his pulse racing like it usually only does during fast laps, his forehead in cold sweat and his guts twisted, making him nauseous. _If it is so bad for me, how bad is it for Dani?_ When they're finally sitting in the doctor's office, Dani's grip on Marc's hand feels like it's breaking his bones one by one and the blood in his head is rushing so loudly that he has problems following the conversation and explanation. One thing he does pick up though, is a sentence that makes the clawing of Dani's fingers even stronger and its meaning is so painful, that Marc's incapable of processing it. "At this stage, it looks like the chances of you riding a motorbike again, leave alone professionally, are under ten percent."

_ponme fuera del reposo_  
 _en mi historia personal_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _put me outside of the comfort_   
> _of my personal history_


	39. Bendecida 2 - Blessed 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brief chapter is brief. And I'll only be updating Saturday again, sorry :/

Dani's mind is blank and his body numb. He vaguely notices being shoved into the car by Marc, driven back to Cervera and escorted to Marc's room, followed by devastated stares from Marc's family. And they've been drinking before, they've smoked before, but never like they're doing now. Wordlessly, Marc had gone to grab them a bottle of Ricard and they're emptying that without a word lost. He's also on his second pack of cigarettes for the day and Marc is stealing drags and sometimes entire cigarettes, both of them standing at Marc's window, leaning out but not noticing the wonderful weather, the clear blue sky or the beauty of the yard underneath. Dani lets the alcohol veil his feelings further, deliberately drinking himself into oblivion. He doesn't notice the light of day fading, he doesn't count whether that's really still the first bottle. It's a moment late at night, cool air floating in through the window, his vision blurred and his legs unsteady, where he crumbles in Marc's arm, sobbing bitterly, dozing on and off with his head in the younger man's lap. Through a haze of alcohol and depression, he feels Marc's fingers drawing lines on his back and in his neck, his last and possibly only coherent thought being that he's lucky to have found Marc prior to this and that it's the first situation in years he couldn't have faced by himself. 

Around dawn, his stomach rebels against everything at once and he throws up into the toilet, Marc by his side and it's not even embarrassing anymore. He wakes up feeling drenched and done and worn out, Marc curled up against his side, snoring slightly. With shaky fingers, he starts playing with Marc's hair, trying to memorize the image of the sleepy, flushed face with the ruffled hair, gorgeous and perfect. And it's really a waste, because it's their last day together before Marc's departure, but they spend most of it on a recliner in the yard, limbs entangled, fingers laced. No words, no kisses, no sex. But full body contact, all the time, along with looks that could probably melt stones. 

They face each other in disbelief at the airport, clinging at each other with despair and oblivious to the occasional passer-by taking a picture. Dani doesn't know what to say or do. He feels like he's dying a bit on the inside and whenever he sees the desperation in Marc's eyes, it makes everything worse. Next to them, Marta is sobbing against Alex's shoulder and behind them, he knows that Roser and Julia must be feeling terrible at the sight of their children in so much distress. For Dani, it's a strange hopelessness, a wide black hole in front of him. And then, after countless hugs, kisses, tears and promises, Marc and Alex have to board their flight and he's pulled into a last hug. "Come as soon as you can."  
Marc's voice is broken and Dani has to swallow hard before he can reply, "I will. I promise. Win for me, okay?"  
They're gone with a nod and Roser and Julia know well enough not to say anything right now, getting Marta and him back home and at their dinner table. With a deep sigh, Roser places their plates in front of them. "I know you don't want to. But I will stay here and watch both of you until you've eaten at least something. Marc and Alex will kill me if they return and I let you starve to death." _At least, we're not alone in this._

_En tú ausencia las paredes_  
 _se pintarán de tristeza_  
 _y enjaularme corazon entre tus huesos_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _In your absence the walls will be covered with sadness and imprison my heart in a cage of your bones._


	40. Combatiente - Fighter

Alex and Marc split at Paris airport, Alex off for a connection flight to London and Marc on his way to Japan. Being alone felt horrible. _It's strange, we've only been with each other for a few weeks._ Those few weeks have been some of the most intense in his life though, so it isn't surprising that they left a deep imprint and feel like an eternity. Without Dani around, Marc feels lost and even a little naked. They haven't really done anything without each other and now he feels like back when he was in Moto3, travelling without his parents for the first time. And suddenly, a slightly scary feeling creeps into the back of his head... have they become too dependent on each other already? Probably, they have, but the truth is that he enjoys that. A lot. The weekend prior to the race weekend, during his obligations, factory visits, autograph sessions, photo shoots, he feels strangely distant, a little disconnected from everything and he notices the concerned looks from Emilio, but whenever his mentor tries to approach him on the matter, he avoids talking about it. It feels wrong to talk about Dani when he isn't there and it's nobody else's business how they are coping at the moment. He spends an awful lot of time on the phone and on Skype, talking to Dani and his parents every free second and although it is still breaking his heart to see Dani, he is relieved to see that the older rider is doing better, crying less, talking more and his parents also say that his mood is slowly but certainly returning towards a fighter spirit. And during the week before Japan's race, Dani has surgery again, on Wednesday. It's a tiny one but it could have a huge effect regarding recovery chances and Marc feels horrible about not being there. It's Marta who updates him throughout the day and at night, when they Skype, he sees Dani smile, eyes tired and face pale, but genuinely hopeful for the first time in weeks and he breaks down in tears right there and then. Especially once he hears that in case everything heels as it's supposed to, Dani will be allowed to come to Malaysia. And they both cry again, only later realizing that the tears are becoming an annoying and embarrassing pattern between them.

After the race is before the race these days and both, Alex and Marc turn noticeably stressed and tired. But they'd both won in Japan and that Monday night, everybody hurrying and stressing out around them, they do find the time to have a proper Skype conference with Marta and Dani.  
"We miss you!"  
"Only two more weeks!" Marc bites his tongue. _Shit. Marta won't be able to come._  
"Oh, Marta has a new picture." He really just wants to hug and squeeze Dani for changing the topic now and Marta is beaming at them.  
And so is Alex. "You have a picture? Show me! I want to see!" Marta holds the little piece paper in front of the webcam and Marc and Alex mutually awe it. All these details, the fact that it is really a complete human being already, it's fascinating Marc so much. "I think you've done a great job." He playfully nudges Alex, who turns pink at the words. In Spain, Marta huffs.  
"So far I've had more work with him." They were just going to giggle, but then it gets caught in their throats and Alex stares at the screen in disbelief.  
"Him?"  
It's Marta's turn to blush and Marc sees Dani squeeze her knee reassuringly. "I know, we weren't going to find out, but it was just obvious when I had the ultrasound today."  
Marc's eyes dart back and forth between a nervously flushing Marta and his brother, who is shivering a bit and who has to blink against tears right now and whatever they both tell them all the time, Marc doesn't believe for a second that they're only "casual" about each other. _Maybe they haven't noticed themselves, but they're so in love. Seriously._ At one point, he'll have to plot with Dani to get them to confess. Not now though, where Alex stares at the screen with tears in his eyes and just mutters, "I'm having a son."  
"We're having a son," Marta corrects softly, with a smile that could light up an entire grey winter season.  
"And soon you'll be fighting over names." Dani smiles, too. This night, they all end the call with a grin on their faces and Marc has the impression that rocks fall from chests audibly everywhere.

It's a couple of days later, the circus set up in Australia now, when he's having a long overdue conversation with Alex. They're on Alex's balcony, sharing a beer, sky dark around them already and the air still too hot and too humid.  
"So, how are you coping by now?" He gives Alex a questioning look.  
His little brother seems more mature nowadays already and Marc cannot help but burst with pride. "I think I'm okay. I'm excited about the baby, you know. We never planned that. Obviously. But now it's, no, he is, there and I love him to pieces although we haven't even met properly. It's just so amazing that he's there. And he's going to be REALLY there so soon."   
Alex's enthusiasm is just great, Marc likes seeing him that way. In his mind, he envisions Alex with a tiny bundle in his arms and by now, the mental image is no longer ridiculous or scary, as it used to only a few weeks ago. Now, it's a prospect that only makes him feel incredibly fond. They sit in silence for a while, before it's Alex's turn to look at him questioningly. "And how are you dealing with everything?"  
Marc shrugs, suddenly feeling very tired. "Depends. With being out? Better than I would have thought. There's not half as much uproar as I would have expected. With Dani's injury? Not so well. I would swap places with him in an instant to be honest. Seeing him like that is so heart-breaking."  
"Now you know how it feels," Alex whispers softly, smiling at him warmly and for the first time, Marc realizes that he's probably felt that way in 2011. He pulls Alex into an embrace and murmurs into his ear, "Thank you. For everything."   
He feels Alex pat his back and then they let go and his little brother looks at him with a look that's inscrutable, even for Marc.   
"Marc?"   
"Yes?"  
"Will you help me pick a ring for Marta tomorrow?" _I knew there's nothing casual about you guys. And also... WOW._

_Soy combatiente, nadie me va a parar_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _I'm a fighter, nothing's going to stop me_


	41. Unintended

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you go: *hands over tissues and towels*  
> ♥

Later, Dani doesn't completely remember how they ended up in the conversation, but it started when, swearing him into secrecy, Marc told him about Alex's plan to propose to Marta and then, it went downhill, rapidly...

_I was just thinking that maybe, you know, not now, but at one point we could do that, too? Right?_

_Do what?_

_Well, get married. It's legal in so many countries._

_You want to get married?_

_Not now, just... I don't know... in some years. Don't you?_

_I don't... I mean... do you really think that it's right?_

_Right?_

_Yes. I think, it's a sacrament, right? Marriage is. And-_

_Wait... are you telling me you can fuck me and even suggest adoption but by some moral double standard you think gay marriage is wrong? Are you trying to imply that homosexuality is wrong then as well?_

_It's not wrong for us, the way we do it now... but I mean, it's definitely not okay by religious standards, right?_

_Okay... so basically, you fucking me is fine, but a serious commitment is wrong? And 'the way we do it now'... are you trying to tell me something? Is this about you not being gay, because you're the one who fucks ME and not the other way round? You make me so sick!_

With that, the lid of Marc's laptop has been slammed closed and Dani is now on Marc's bed, in Marc's house and he's never felt so wrong about being there. _Shit._ The truth is, he's just overwhelmed and overrun with the idea. He has no idea what he thinks is right or wrong or anything anymore and he hasn't had a clue for some weeks now, with their relationship progressing way too rapidly for his own personality to catch up with. However, the one thing he is sure about is that he loves Marc more than he has loved anyone ever before and he really screwed that up by saying something completely, utterly dumb and stupid that he should better have thought about by himself first. He collapses on the bed, a sobbing mess once again and he falls asleep from the exhaustion of crying.

Marc' parents and Marta certainly heard his breakdown last night and he doesn't really know if Marc told them anything. It doesn't look like they are angry at him though. Three pairs of eyes study him, concern all over the faces, when he sits down for breakfast with them. It's a very silent and tense meal and there's almost an audible sigh of relief from Marta and Roser when they've emptied their mugs and leave the kitchen. Dani stays with Julia, who puts his coffee back on the table and leans back in his chair now, eyeing Dani with a frown.  
"So, what did you do?"  
Dani swallows against the tears and the lump in his throat, clinging to his own mug as if his life depended on it, blushing with shame and staring to the ground. His brain won't form a coherent reply and all he manages is a slight shrug.  
"Okay. Well, Marc hasn't said anything, whatever that tells you about the matter. I've seen him though, last night, and he looked bad. And as you've probably figured, we all heard you - and you didn't sound well. So, I really don't need much fatherly intuition to suspect that you two have problems, right?"  
Dani nods. "Hm, I thought so. And are those problems fixable?"  
How Dani wishes he knew. How he wishes they were. He shrugs again, feeling the first tears roll over his face.  
"Dani?"  
There's this warmth and genuine concern in Julia's voice that touches Dani to the bones and that makes everything pour out of his mouth at once, all the worries, all the shame, all the insecurities. From the fear of losing Marc to the fear of losing himself, from the anger at himself for not thinking before talking to the anger at Marc for bringing up everything at once. And Julia, in his unique way of staying calm through just any emotional outburst he's been forced to witness over the past month, just listens quietly. Not once does he interrupt, not once throw a judging look or comment at Dani. And when Dani has finally said everything and more, when he's exhausted, drained, all cried out and completely wasted, Julia takes him out for a smoke without a word lost on the incident.  
They finish their cigarette in silence, the only sounds coming from the pool's filter system and the birds. With a sigh, Julia finally gets up and before he walks back inside, absentmindedly says something, for the first time since Dani poured his heart out. It's a brief speech, but it's one that has been overdue in Dani's life, his own parents failing at teaching him. "I don't know your parents, Dani, but I think I've met people with a similar mindset. I think they forget, or deliberately choose to ignore, to teach you that love is really above all those things, above gender, race or age. You don't get to pick whom you fall for. You can only pick how you deal with it. I haven't approved of many of Marc's and Alex's choices so far because they never had the patience to wait for love, which in my eyes, they should. I accepted your relationship without second guessing, because clearly, it's different. And I'd like you to realize that at one point, to understand how beautiful it is that you two can just love each other, regardless of all the rest."

_Sounds great. Except it's probably a lesson I'm learning too late. Because really, after what I said, there's not much reason for Marc to trust me again. Ever._

_You could be my unintended_  
 _Choice to live my life extended_


	42. I Gave You All

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the song... basically just because I'm listening to it all the time. And the rest... I apologize (a bit) ♥  
> And THANK YOU for the feedback

"Dani Pedrosa is a giant asshole," Marc slurs loudly. Jorge and Nicky sigh and Vale reaches over to steady the young man who is about to fall from the stool.  
"Marc, it's enough." It's Jorge's turn to try to talk some sense into him - but since when is it possible to talk sense into someone who is as drunk as this?  
"No, I will stay here. And drink. And then I'm going to walk right over there and fuck him." Marc is still slurring and stumbling while he more or less falls from the stool and vaguely points towards a table where Alvaro is sitting with the Espargaros. Vale cringes, but thinks that at least Marc said it softly enough so that the others haven't noticed.  
"I want another one!" Marc slumps over the bar and gestures at the bartender who raises an eyebrow.  
It's Nicky who's genuinely fed up now, wrapping an arm around Marc's waist and who without much ado, claims, "No, you don't. You've had your share of self-pity for the night and you're going to bed now."  
"I want him to take me to bed!" Marc is pointing at Jorge now, who blushes and cringes and shakes his head wildly.  
"Jorge has a lovely young lady waiting for him and I am sure he'll prefer that over a drunk pile of mess anytime. And you're coming up with us now." Nicky gives Vale a stern look and, not without another sigh, Vale slides from his chair and takes Marc's other arm, helping Nicky to shove the young Marquez towards the elevator.  
"Where are you going?" Vale huffs.  
"Your room. Our room. Whatever. We're not leaving him by himself," Nicky snaps and Vale just sighs again. _Of course we're not._  
They splay him on Vale's bed, fully clothed and he falls asleep before he's fully touching the mattress. Nicky and Vale spend the night on the couch, taking turns at accompanying Marc to the bathroom when he gets sick. The next morning is tense, all of them still tired, Marc obviously still sick and Vale still angry. Nicky takes Marc out on the balcony, suggesting the fresh air would probably help. With the Kentucky Kid lighting a cigarette, Marc leans over the railing, trying to form coherent thoughts over the relentless pounding in his head.  
"You know, you should give Dani time."  
Marc nods, regretting it immediately when a new wave of pain floods his head. "I know," he whispers and he really does, because he's realized a while ago that fighting over something he wouldn't want to within the next five to ten years hasn't been worth it. It just hurts so bad, because the realization that Dani could possibly consider anything about their love wrong is simply breaking his heart.  
"Has Vale ever told you about how sick Dani got the first time you properly made out?"  
"He got sick?"  
"Yes. He's been taught, all his life, that what he was feeling and doing there was disgusting and wrong and the conflict drove him up the wall. It made him physically sick. You know, it's not easy to accept a part of you that you've been told is ugly and despicable. How do you want to embrace that?"  
Marc throws a sideways glance at the American, who looks pensive, eyebrows frowning, lips releasing thin lines of smoke. "Is that how you feel?" He remembers the headlines about Nicky's parents' reaction.  
Nicky shrugs. "It's how I felt. Yes. It's better now, but we've had a lot more time to get used to things than you guys did. You've barely been together when the crash happened, which in itself would have been testing any relationship and then the outing, which none of us really planned. That's too much, too soon for almost anyone and for Dani-" Nicky pauses. Marc knows, for Dani, shy, reserved, self-conscious Dani who, with his arm in pieces, had enough worries to face right now.  
"Not my smartest move, huh?" Marc says with resignation and Nicky nods and pats his shoulder.  
"Probably not. And now go and transform into a decent human being and get out there to do your job. And tonight, you'll tell Dani that you love him."  
Marc sighs and leaves for his rooms. _Just that I don't know if he'll ever listen to me again. And I don't know if I can really accept that he thinks or thought that our relationship is disgusting and wrong._ Nicky cringes after him, because for the American's taste, there's way too much defiance in Marc's look.

And Marc wins and celebrates without as much as batting an eyelid, avoiding any questions in interviews and leading the media to make wild assumptions on Dani's health. He never calls Dani that night, turning off his phone as soon as he gets to the hotel and while he understands what Nicky wanted to tell him and while he can see that for Dani it's all difficult, his heart is still aching from what Dani said and he's not sure he can wait for Dani to adjust. Or maybe, he just doesn't want to be something Dani has to _adjust to_.

_and you ripped it from my heart and you swear it's all gone_


	43. Under Pressure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥  
> It's been a weird couple of days, but the outcome seems to be okay. So, enjoy ♥

They don't hear much from Marc, but Alex keeps them vaguely updated over the following days. Dani is fully aware that he broke things and the more distant Marc becomes, the more he knows that he needs him with a surprising urgency. So, he will have to fix things and after his doctor's appointment on Wednesday, he books flights for him and Julia. _Because we're not missing the moment when you become world champion._ That he most certainly would, as even a fourth place would yield enough points for Marc to pick up his second title. And once the flights are booked, Dani spends his Thursday in stores around Barcelona, picking the perfect peace offering. And while he's at it, he gets a stuffed ant for Marta. Because he can only imagine how horrible their departure is for her, having to be left behind, still not able to get the comfort from Alex that she'd need and deserve. He heard her cry at night, too, heard her fight with her parents over the phone. And he cannot tell her what Marc told him, because that's a surprise only Alex can let her in to. The way her eyes sparkle whenever Alex calls has long given away that for her, just like for Alex, there is nothing casual about that relationship and Dani has no doubt that Alex's ring will be accepted.

He sits on the couch with her, late Thursday night, his own nerves already failing because of seeing Marc so soon. "So, what has the doctor said about your arm?"  
Dani shrugs. "It's a little better than expected. But he really doesn't have much hope. Either way, I can start with some physio once we return from Malaysia. And the prognosis doesn't matter, right? Nothing matters as long he doesn't say there's no hope. I'd fight for one percent."  
"You're brave." _No, actually I'm not._ Dani swallows hard.  
"I think you're braver, going through all of this for the baby." He looks at her, obvious baby bump under her T-Shirt and her hands fidgeting with the stuffed animal and she looks so lost.  
"I didn't really have a choice, did I?" She sounds a bit distant and he watches her hand move over the baby bump. After a while of silence, she suddenly lets out a brief chuckle and Dani raises an eyebrow. "Sorry, he has the hiccups."  
"What? Hiccups?" Dani is lost somewhere between confusion and disbelief. Marta just grabs his hand and places it next to hers and really, he can feel it now as well... that little boy has the hiccups and they can already notice it. "Wow!" He looks at Marta with wide eyes and a huge grin on his face.  
Marta returns the smile and then, with the softest voice, she starts speaking, all the while holding his hand fixed on her stomach. "I envy you, you know? I'd love to go myself. But do me a favor and tell Alex how much I miss him. How much we miss him." Dani nods but before he can say anything, she continues. "I don't know what happened between you and Marc, but I hope you'll fix it. You're a great couple." With a quick peck to his cheek, she gets up from the couch and walks towards the hallway. "I'm going to bed, goodnight Dani. You're really sweet." She holds up the ant briefly, winking beautifully and he watches her leave, amazed that in contrast to most other pregnant women, she's still gorgeously graceful. _Alex sure has some taste. But you were wrong. I'm not sweet._

They embark on their journey on Friday, making it to Malaysia on Saturday, both equally drained and exhausted. Dani usually has no problems to sleep during flights, but this time has been different because the nervousness of seeing Marc again is growing by the second and becoming more and more unbearable. While Julia goes straight to the track, Dani gets a taxi to the hotel, letting himself in to Marc's room with the help of a spare keycard that Santi and Vale organized and left with the receptionist for him. He enters the room hesitantly, a bit of the early awe for everything related to Marc returning and he is instantly hit by the scent. It's Marc's after shave and shampoo, Marc's clothes, Marc's own scent, all mixed together and it's breath-taking and making his desire painful. Dani drops his bag and sits down on the bed. He's made a decision for today. One that he hasn't planned on making anytime soon, but at some point during the flight, he just knew he will have to DO something. What he's broken, he cannot fix with words or gifts. Yet, there's something he can do. At least, he thinks there is. The wish has flashed up in Marc's eyes before, unmistakably. Marc never mentioned it though and Dani preferred not to draw any attention to it, because he never felt ready. Truth to be told, he feels all but ready now. He drops on his back and reaches for a shirt that Marc left on the bed, holding on to it and nuzzling his head into it. And suddenly, feeling surrounded by Marc, he does fall asleep.

The sound of the door opening makes him jump, coming to stand next to the bed, shirt dropped to the floor and eyes widening, staring at Marc who just entered and looks back at him with a shocked expression. Determinedly, Dani blinks the tears from his eyes and coughs. "Listen, I-" He doesn't get any further, Marc almost throwing himself at him, squeezing him so tightly that his ribs hurt, but he doesn't care. He wouldn't care if Marc broke every single one again now, as long as he keeps holding him. "I am so sorry," he whispers it straight to Marc's ear and he's relieved that Marc is still not letting go, is still clinging to him, holding on to him as tightly as before. Gathering his courage, he reaches for Marc's neck and pulls him down for a kiss, another flood of relief washing over him when Marc allows it and even reciprocates. It's a long kiss, starting chaste, soft, gentle and then, bit by bit, growing more demanding, with Marc's hands now in his hair, their lips parted and their tongues fighting for the upper hand. It's Marc who steps forward, closing that last bit of a gap between them, bodies flush against each other now and when they break apart, the familiar taste of blood lingers in Dani's mouth. They're standing there in silence, foreheads against each other, both panting heavily and bodies shivering. Neither of them can deny the effect of the kiss, their reactions blatantly pressing against each other's body. And Dani really knows that they will have to talk, too, but for now, he thinks he really has to do something and with a hoarse and breathless voice, he hisses into Marc's ear, "I want to show you something. I want to show you that whatever problems I have, it's not what you thought, okay? Just let me prove it."  
He tilts his head, studying Marc's face now, watching the younger rider process his words and seeing the colour of Marc's eyes darken when he grasps the meaning and finally and very slowly nods. For an instant, Dani's blood freezes in his veins at the realization of what they will do, then he leans in for another kiss, grabbing a fistful of Marc's shirt. _I can do this. With you, I can._

_Can't we give ourselves one more chance?_   
_Why can't we give love that one more chance?_


	44. Senda - Way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know about you... but after all those angsty chapters, I needed this ♥  
> Again, thanks A LOT for the feedback and just generally following me through the randomness ♥

Needless to say they have a lot to talk about, but the second Marc entered that room and saw Dani, his anger and disappointment had vanished into the air. He still wants to clarify things, but he realizes that tonight won't be the time for it. With a frown, he sees the fear in Dani's eyes and he isn't sure if this is going to be the best or the worst thing they've ever done. It's definitely something he wants, craves and needs though. There have been all these moments where he had to restrain himself from doing it - and Dani offering it on a silver plate, that's an offer he cannot possibly decline. He's moaning into their kiss and spreads his legs slightly, adjusting their height difference so that their erections are rubbing against each other, separated by layers of denim that make for the most splendid friction. Dani is groaning now, too, but the fear in his mocha colored eyes is not gone. Placing his hands on Dani's shoulders, Marc breaks their kiss and swallows hard.  
"Are you absolutely sure?" And he will not ask again, because if Dani agrees now, his self-control will be exhausted for the night.  
Dani nods, gulps, and then croaks, "Yes. I am." 

Marc has the feeling he has just been awarded the most precious and fragile present and, suddenly feeling calm and patient, the urgency pushed away by the knowledge that it's actually happening, he takes off his own clothes. He is reveling in the way Dani eyes him, the older man absentmindedly licking his lips and releasing a soft hum when Marc's boxer briefs drop to the floor, revealing his strained cock. He locks eyes with Dani, exchanging a look of determination and losing himself in that mocha, not failing to notice that lust is taking over the fear in Dani's eyes slowly but steadily. Careful not to hurt Dani's arm, he peels the T-Shirt from the smaller rider, his lips sucking little bruises on Dani's throat and collarbones and his fingers brushing over Dani's sides to make him shiver. Dropping to his knees, he presses a kiss against Dani's bellybutton, his hands undoing Dani's belt and shoving down his jeans. His mouth moves to the damp patch on Dani's boxer briefs and above his head, Dani whimpers, his good hand clutching to Marc's hair to steady himself. Teasingly, Marc lets his tongue slide over the fabric, his fingers moving under the waistband and then he takes the last piece of clothing down, sitting back on his heels to marvel Dani's perfect body, bruises from the crash mostly faded by now, muscles toned and skin glowing. 

He slowly kisses Dani's tip, his fingers brushing over the insides of Dani's thighs simultaneously. It makes the smaller rider tremble and clutch to Marc's hair hard again, trying to remain upright. Marc's lips are grinning around Dani's cock when he swallows him down now, Dani's nails digging into his scalp and a string of swears followed by a low moan falling from Dani's mouth. Circling Dani's cock with the fingers of one hand, he bops his head up and down, agonizingly slow and provoking loud whimpers, while he takes another finger, gently sliding it through Dani's crease, pressing against his entrance tentatively. He feels Dani tense up under the touch, but at the same time, he hears his breath hitch, followed by a low growl. "Marc, stop, I'll- " He takes his head away, looking up to Dani through his lashes and with a fond smile. Teasingly slow, his hands move to cup Dani's perfect ass now. "Ready?" He licks his lips and sees Dani nod, almost eagerly. 

Marc gets up, his legs slightly unsteady from the uncomfortable kneeling and pulls Dani into a gentle kiss, before asking, "So, how do you want to play this?" His voice is low and hoarse with arousal and when he scrutinizes Dani's face now, he fondly notices that the fear has vanished, fully replaced by craving.  
"I want to see you." Dani holds his gaze and he feels strangely proud about the trust when he carefully pushes the older man down into the mattress, littering his neck with kisses.  
Between Dani's spread legs, Marc sits back on his heels, reaching for the lube on the nightstand. He takes another moment to marvel Dani, splayed vulnerably and only for him and Dani looks at him, holding his gaze bravely. There's a flicker of nervousness now, but for the most part, Dani just looks beautifully ruffled and full of desire. Inhaling sharply, Marc starts pressing against the tight muscles with a single, slick finger, his other hand stroking Dani's cock and his eyes focused on Dani's face. He can see that it's uncomfortable for Dani who is biting his lip now and Marc can feel him squirm, uncertainty rising in his eyes. "Relax, okay? It gets easier."  
Marc starts moving and, around his fingers, slowly feels Dani's muscles loosen up. His own erection is throbbing painfully, but he wants and has to do this slowly. It's agonizing and beautiful at the same time, finally having Dani's full trust, having him literally open up for him. Marc bites his lip now as well, holding back a greedy moan and he adds a second finger. Dani winces briefly but then manages to relax again and when Marc carefully curls his fingers while pushing, Dani starts moaning and even arching his back, jerking his hips and pressing back against Marc's fingers. It makes the younger rider smile briefly, before he adds a third finger, his other hand still stroking Dani's cock firmly. This time, there's no wince, just a short, sharp inhale before Dani seems to adjust, pushing back against Marc's fingers and growling, "Move."  
He complies and moans at the beautiful sight, Dani unravelling under his hands, entire body flushed and covered with a sheen of sweat. Dani's growling is getting more desperate, single whimpers in between and Marc sees that his functioning hand is clawing in the sheet so tightly that the knuckles are white. "Close." Marc hears the warning and stops cold, leaving Dani gasping for air. There's a high-pitched whimper when he withdraws to crawl up over Dani now, licking his way up from the smaller rider's stomach to his throat. Propped up on his arms, he lines himself up between them and starts breaching Dani's muscles. Their faces are close in front of each other now and he can see the focus in Dani's face, the concentration on relaxing, as contradictory as that sounds. With Dani's legs wrapped around his waist, he sinks down, claiming the older man's mouth and fully burying himself. It's the most delicious pain not to start thrusting right there and then, waiting for Dani to adjust to the feeling. Marc's vision is blurring and his arms are shaky, his breath hitches somewhat desperately. Then, when the older rider pulls him closer with his legs, his hips bucking against Marc's laps, it's the cue for him, the permission to start moving and it feels so good, so incredibly good that his mind zones out almost instantly, his body reduced to instincts and all his thoughts and actions limited to thrusting into Dani, roughness increasing when Dani's moaning into their kiss gets louder. Marc's arms are already trembling with exhaustion, but his mind is too far gone to care. He's been waiting for this forever and he's determined to enjoy every second. When he feels that he cannot take it much longer, the rhythm inevitably driving him beyond the point of no return, he reaches between them, tugging on Dani's cock, followed by Dani breaking their kiss to gasp for air desperately and growling loudly. It doesn't take long before Marc feels the familiar tension in Dani's muscles, followed by a loud yell of his name and hot liquid splattering over his hands. The moment Dani's muscles clench tighter around him pushes him over the edge as well, his climax crashing over him like a giant wave of bliss.

It takes them a while to recover, Marc collapsed on Dani and both desperate for air. Dani squirms and winces, when Marc pulls out and rolls to his side, but Marc doesn't want to crush him. They shower wordlessly but together and this time, Marc gently washes Dani, only interrupted by chaste kisses. He dries both of them and in boxers and with a duvet around them, they sit down on the floor of the balcony, both staring into the dark sky. It's Malaysia, and it's humid and hot, but Marc has the feeling that in this very moment, they are both so fragile that they need the blanket, even if it is more to protect themselves against the rest of the world than anything else. Dani's head is on Marc's shoulder, the damp hair making him shiver, tiny drops of water trickling down his chest. Despite Marc cursing and cringing at himself internally, they share a cigarette, the younger rider stealing his drags fom Dani. "Are you okay?" He runs his fingers over Dani's arm, watching the other man's hair stand up at the sensation.  
"More than okay. That was perfect." Dani's voice is barely audible because he's whispering so softly. "I am so sorry, Marc."  
"I know."

_prométerme_  
 _construir una senda_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _promise me to build a way_


	45. No Más Lágrimas - No More Tears

Being back in Marc's arm is all and more than Dani wants and needs right now and even after flying more than 20 hours, to a new country on a different continent, this is what being home feels like. Involuntarily, tears dwell up in his eyes and no matter how hard he tries to blink and get rid of them, they still roll down his cheeks. He almost broke everything, he is still not sure if they're okay now and it's freaking him out. Marc's face flashes up in his mind, the way he looked at him when he crawled over him to fuck him, that infinite desire, the black eyes, the intense focus. It's been absolutely beautiful and totally worth the pain. Dani sniffs and tries to wipe the tears away secretly, but Marc seems to have noticed as he pulls him closer against his chest now, a hand running through his hair. It's making Dani shiver from head to toe, wishing the moment would never end.

"Are you okay?" Marc's voice sounds concerned.  
"Yes," Dani nods, "just overwhelmed."  
He feels Marc press a kiss on his head. "Okay. And Dani?"  
"Hm?" He melts into Marc's touch, into the fingers that are massaging his scalp and the hand that rests possessively on his stomach.  
"I understand. Not just today. Everything. I mean, it still hurts, but I can understand."  
Dani takes a deep breath and, on his stomach, laces his fingers with Marc's. "You know that I love you, right?"  
"Yes. And I love you, too." Marc is kissing his neck now and Dani has to bite his lip, avoiding a moan.  
His heart pounds nervously when he asks now, asks the one question, that's on his mind all the time. "Are we okay?"  
"I think so. Maybe a little bruised, but nothing that won't heal." Marc chuckles. "In fact, you'll be sore."  
"Yeah. I'll like it. It will remind me of you and of all the things you do to me."  
"Dani," Marc reaches around his face, his thumb wiping a tear from his eye. "Can you stop crying now?"

_no puedo dormir con esas lágrimas_  
 _goteando encima de mí_

They arrive in the pit lane together on the day of the race, hands laced, grins on their faces, oblivious to the photos taken of their arrival. Dani sees Julia and Alex beam at them and Alex is giving him a thumbs up. He'll have to tell him about Marta and the hiccups, but not before his race. With a content sigh, he enters the familiar garage, Marc's hand in his and even Alberto cannot suppress a small smile when they are standing in front of him. He pats their shoulders with a sigh and then walks away, mumbling something towards Emilio on his way. "Oh, sometimes I wish I could be that young again."  
It's strange to be there and not really be involved and eventually, Dani ends up spending his time with Julia, who is more used to these circumstances. When the Moto3 race starts, they're both almost dying from the excitement. After all, Alex needs a podium to stay in the race for the championship. He ends up third and Dani thinks that Julia's screaming probably does permanent damage to his ears. Towards the end of Moto2, Marc already in his pre-race tunnel state, Alex comes around to the Repsol garage and Dani finally finds the time to tell him about Cervera.  
"Hiccups, really?" Alex is beaming at him, same disbelief in his eyes that Dani had felt when Marta told him.  
"Yes," he nods, "seriously. It feels amazing. And she's so proud of you and she always says the cutest things about you."  
"Thank you." The lanky rider throws himself around his neck now, Dani almost losing balance and chuckling at the impulsive reaction.  
"So, are you going to ask her?" He locks gazes with Alex, the young rider instantly serious.  
"Yes," Alex nods. "Definitely. It might have taken me a bit longer than it should have, but I realized that I care and that I love her and that we should admit and show that."  
"Brave kid," Dani playfully nudges Alex's side, grinning at the pout the nickname provoked. "Don't feel insulted. You know you're the most mature out of all of us."

The three of them watch the MotoGP race together and Dani thinks it's pure terror. Not because he's jealous, because he's really not. There's a strange, sad sting in his guts, the want to be on a bike, yes, but that has nothing to do with the blank horror he feels when he has to watch Marc on that screen. He's biting his nails and squeezing his eyes shut, afraid he will suffer a heart attack and his fingers are digging in Alex's arm relentlessly over the last few laps. He will never be able to describe the feeling of pure joy and pride when he sees Marc cross the line, first of course, closely followed by the Yamaha's. It's close to an orgasm and it floods his veins with happiness, making him feels as if he is about to burst. Marc, as usual, is jumping towards them, helmet still on, but he takes it off as soon as he sees him and over the fence, he pulls Dani in for a messy kiss, mechanics around them cheering and clapping.

He watches Marc celebrate, to his own surprise completely without hard feelings and sometimes, over the cheering crowd, the journalists cornering him and all the people trying to congratulate, their eyes meet and it always feels wonderful, sending waves of happiness through Dani's body. It's after the interview and some cheering with the crew, that they meet in Marc's motorhome, the others considerate enough to leave them alone for the moment and there's no hesitation when Dani pushes Marc into the bathroom, shedding their clothes on the way clumsily and shoves him into the shower. At first, Marc looks at him with surprise, then with joy and when he has him backed against the tiles of the shower, water running over them and Dani dropped to his knees, Marc's eyes are burning with desire, his hands clenched in Dani's hair. It's a quick and dirty blowjob, Marc trying hard to stay quiet with the paper thin walls around them, but just with the hurry, the urgency and the restraint, it's ever so much passionate and when they're dried and dressed again, hair still damp and gasping for air, they exchange one of these shy, still unbelieving looks, that have accompanied them since the start of their relationship. "Congratulations, I am so proud of you!" Dani pulls Marc down for a final, gentle kiss and then, fingers laced between them, they step outside, cameras flashing, people shouting and behind the crowd, Alex winking at them. Briefly, Dani realizes that the fact that his hair is just as damp as Marc's probably gives away pretty much everything - but it really doesn't matter.

Facing a long party night, they have to say their goodbyes to Julia and Alex now as they want to leave for Spain, Alex impatient to be back with Marta. Dani pulls the younger, but much taller Marquez into an awkward embrace and has to get on his toes to whisper in Alex's ear now. "Make her happy, okay?"  
Alex blushes and the same is repeated a minute later, when Marc whispers something that remains inaudible for Dani into his younger brother's ear. Alex and Julia disappear beaming and waving and next to him, he hears Marc whisper, "God, I can't believe he's doing that."  
Planning to spend the night now, they have to rearrange flights, just like everybody else. Even Vale, Jorge and Nicky have accepted the invitation to stay for the party, ignoring their respective teams positions on that determinedly, Vale just stating that fraternizing with the enemy wouldn't matter anymore as the enemy had won anyway. Dani sees Marc discussing the new schedule with Marc and he sees the confusion and irritation on the younger man's face, catches the occasional smirk from Sanit. He's holding his breath when Marc approaches him, his heart threatening to break his freshly healed ribs again, the little piece of metal burning in the pocket of his jeans and his hands feeling sweaty now. Marc stops in front of him, head tilted sideways and looks at him questioningly. "So, could you maybe elaborate on why I am booked on a connecting flight to Geneva?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _I can't sleep with these tears dripping down on me_


	46. Slow

Marc is still facing Dani, waiting for an answer and from the sudden, complete silence around them, he can tell that everybody knows why those flights were changed - everybody but him. In front of him, Dani had basically turned crimson and it would be adorably if Marc wasn't so curious right now. Then, Dani just pulls him down in a kiss, crowd around them cheering and while their lips are still locked and Marc's mind is still spinning, he feels Dani hand something to him that, when they break apart, panting slightly, and he studies it, turns out to be a key. _Seriously?_ Marc stares at Dani, who is still deep red, biting his lip but who holds his gaze and after a moment, voice trembling, declares, "You're moving." Marc almost chokes and he feels his mind go blank at the words. It's more than he would have hoped for, obviously, after Dani's latest objections and at the same time, it's a step he isn't even sure he's ready to take, but then it's also an offer to let him in, really let him in, that he could never ever decline and it feels much too good to be true. Then, he notices that Dani is waiting for him to say something - and he wants to, but his mouth won't form words, no matter how hard he tries. He sees Dani's gaze lower and feels the disappointment. It's killing him, because he WANTS, he just cannot speak and he takes firm hold of Dani's wrists, still rummaging for the right things to say, when Dani whispers, "Only if you want to of course."  
Marc may not be able to speak currently but at least he finally remembers how to move and so he just throws himself at Dani, making both of them stumble and he devours him, his hand determinedly burying the key in the depths of his jeans. _I am never returning that. Ever._

His party turns out wild enough. He has no idea who planned it, though his guesses are on Santi and Emilio, but it's surely perfect. An entire club for them, music that he likes, more alcohol than he could wish for, his best friends enjoying themselves - and his boyfriend, glued to his side, looking fabulous, smiling at him fondly. What else should or could he ask from the world? After a decent number of drinks, they endure a ridiculous conversation with Vale, who tries to convince them of the advantages of adopting now as the kid could grow up alongside Alex's. Following an established pattern, a very drunk Nicky falls asleep soundly in a booth. And Marc suddenly feels Dani pull on his sleeve and sees him point towards Jorge and Clara, who are having fun on the dance floor, Clara elegantly grinding against the Spanish driver, head tilted back to steal a kiss, both only eyes for each other. Then, Dani gets on his toes and he feels the smaller man's lips brush against his ear, making him shiver. "I want that, too."  
For an instant, Marc wants to shake his head. He doesn't do that kind of dancing, not at all. Then, his eyes rests on their friends again before they meet Dani's, who is looking up to him expectantly and beaming. He couldn't say no if he wanted to. Also, the idea of Dani rubbing against him in that way doesn't seem so bad, after all. Actually, he would even go so far that it seems a delicious plan and when Dani tentatively reaches a hand out to pull him on the dance floor, he follows eagerly.

_Slow down and dance with me_

The atmosphere swallows him completely, leaves him drowning in sensations. His body is vibrating from the bass, the air is filled with the scent of smoke, alcohol and all kinds of perfumes, it's hot and sticky and Dani is pressed flush against him, body contact from chests to groins established firmly, grinding against him in the rhythm of a Kylie Minogue song, movements just as elegant as Clara's. On Marc's mind, there's not a single coherent thought right now, even the fact that he has just crowned himself MotoGP world champion is washed away by the complete overload of sensation he is in right now. They kiss messily and passionately and briefly, the thought flickers through his brain how impossible _this_ would have been a few weeks ago, the two of them making out in front of an entire club and most of their team and no one even reacts to it anymore. After a few songs, both of them sweaty and exhausted, Marc has to resist the urge to devour Dani in a bathroom stall, but then he figures that would be taking it a step too far. And when they return to the hotel, the new day dawning already, they hit the mattress like stones, falling asleep tangled but fully clothed. 

It's Vale, apparently resistant against any form of alcohol and sneaky enough to get the hotel to hand him a keycard to their room, who wakes them a few hours later and after one of the quickest showers and the most unorganized packing in their lives, they end up in a taxi with Vale and Nicky, who share their flight until Paris. They have to wait for boarding a bit and while they're sitting there, everyone but the Italian looking disheveled and devastated, where Marc suddenly remembers and interview of Vale he saw a while back and it makes him burst in giggles. He gets funny looks for that but he won't explain. Only when they finally get to go to their seats, he tilts his head up to Valentino's and hisses into the Italian's ear, "Mile High Club, huh? Are you a full member now?" For the first time in his life, he sees Valentino Rossi blush and it makes him burst into laughter again.

At some point during the flight, he notices Vale and Nicky discuss something very softly but very animatedly and, intrigued by the intensity of their debate, rests his eyes on them. Nicky looks irritated at first and Vale just keeps talking and talking, the Kentucky Kid's expression slowly turning a bit more interested and then, though still hesitant, he sees the American nod slowly, Vale's face lighting up immediately. A twisting in his guts tells Marc that this won't end well, his thoughts confirmed when Vale gets up now and throws him a challenging look - before he disappears towards the restroom. The realization hits Marc immediately, his blood freezing and his mind undecided between disgust and arousal. When Nicky gets up a bit later, legs trembling a little but following Valentino's lead, Marc gulps audibly.  
Then, as if that's not enough to keep his mind busy, Dani stirs next to him and when he turns his head, the older rider is frowning at him. "Why have you been staring at them like that?" He can feel his cheeks heat up and he knows that resistance is futile now and leans towards Dani, whispering into his ear.  
"You're not really making this a competition?" Dani's face is red now as well and he is glaring.  
"No, I mean..." Marc shrugs helplessly. "It's not a competition, but don't you think there's something... I don't know... hot about it?"  
"Hot? It sounds difficult and exhausting and I don't really think of the idea of them knowing what we're up to is hot, no, really not." Dani is shaking his head, but at the same time, he is squirming slightly and there's something unsteady about his breathing and Marc _knows_ his signals. Putting on his most seductive smile, he leans towards Dani, making sure his lips touch the older riders sensitive earlobes and gently putting his hand in Dani's lap, finding his suspicion more than confirmed, and he hisses, "Really? Such a shame." He slides Dani's hand in his lap, hoping no flight attendant passes them right now. "Because I think it's really hot."

_Skip a beat and move with my body_

Dani turns into a squirming tomato and that still hasn't changed when first Nicky returns and then Valentino, both looking rumpled and spaced out, but Vale also with a devilish smirk and eyes that say "I dare you". In response, Marc's and Dani's eyes lock and they have a wordless conversation that ends with a slight nod from Dani, a nod that sends a sting straight to Marc's groin. His legs tremble on the way into the tiny toilet and once inside, he quickly realizes that this will make for an interesting acrobatic challenge. His heart is pounding nervously while he waits and then, looking as stricken as Marc feels, Dani slides inside. They face each other like nervous teenagers for a moment but then something snaps and the next second, they're all over each other, teeth gritting, hands exploring, quiet moans filling the air. It takes a lot of fidgeting and a fair amount of flexibility before Dani is sitting on the toilet lid, Marc leaning over the basin and Dani's tongue and fingers opening him roughly. It burns and stings more than usual, which is understandable with spit as lube and the general hurry of the moment, but it's also more arousing than he ever imagined. In the mirror, he can see Dani's face, eyes focused, biting down on his lip, cheeks flushed. Dani's fingers start hitting his prostate now and he bites his own hand to stifle his groaning. "Ready?" Dani's voice is breathless and very low and Marc doesn't reply, pushing against Dani greedily instead. Dani doesn't hesitate, pulling out his fingers rapidly and replacing them with his cock almost instantly, his arm on Marc's thighs firmly pressing the younger rider down. It's exhausting, a bit scary and totally crazy, but it's crazy in a way that makes both of them lose their minds quickly. Neither of them lasts long and they are soon a panting, sticky mess, Marc collapsed on Dani's lap and Dani's breath hot against his back.  
Gathering all their artistic abilities again, they manage to clean themselves up and redress, a check in the mirror confirming that while they're still ruffled and flushed, they look mostly okay. "You'll be the end of me," Dani whispers when he pushes the door open, but the broad grin on his face tells Marc that even if this was his end, he wouldn't mind that much.

They exchange a few funny looks with Vale and Nicky during the rest of the flight, all of them struggling to suppress their giggles and when they part their ways at Paris airport, they exchange warm hugs and friendly words and even Nicky's cheeks finally return to their normal color. _It's weird how we went from casual friends to THIS so quickly._ Marc shrugs at the thought and then is distracted by the impatient beeping of his phone. He opens the message and squeaks, loudly, in the middle of the airport, prompting Dani to drop everything and stare at the screen with him. _She said yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you both and prepare to be best men._  
"Wow," he looks at Dani, smiling incredulously, "my brother is having a baby and getting married and I am moving to Switzerland with my first ever true boyfriend." Dani smiles back at him, something inscrutable in his eyes.  
"I hope you don't mind us taking things slow?" Dani mumbles after a while, their hands laced between them while they walk over to their gate.  
Marc shakes his head. "No, not really. Slow is good."

Getting to Geneva and then to Dani's house feels incredible for Marc. His veins flood with nervousness and anxiety when Dani pulls into the driveway and they walk towards the door, hands clasped again. Next to him, Dani gulps audibly as well and Marc has never felt as freaked out and solemn about unlocking a door as he does now, the new key shaking in his fingers and his movements clumsy. "Welcome home." Dani wraps an arm around his waist and pulls him inside, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. "I want to get some water from the kitchen, do you want anything?" Marc shakes his head, still overwhelmed with the situation and Dani nods and walks away, turning his head back towards him half way through. "Could you take the bags upstairs?"  
"Sure. Sure, of course," Marc mumbles nervously, mentally kicking himself for his incoherence and he steps up the stairs, slowly and still feeling strangely solemn about everything. _And Dani's so nervous, too. That's actually pretty cute._ Lost in thoughts, he pushes the bedroom door open, dropping all bags at once and freezing to the spot. There's a bottle of champagne on the bed. And a rose. And a tiny black box, a black box that very, very clearly resembles another box that Alex held up about a week ago, in a jewelry store in Australia. _Slow might be good, but not best._

_You know what I'm saying_   
_And I haven't said a thing_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of inspiration is from this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sGRXnbQPh4  
> (The second last question, around 3:40, I think ;) )


	47. Parasiempre - Forever

Dani has slowly followed Marc upstairs and is now leaning in the bedroom door, watching Marc stare at the bed with disbelief. He makes a mental note of eternal gratefulness to Marta for helping him plot this and to his elderly neighbor, Madame Blecourt, who always gets his mail when he's away and who, upon hearing the story, eagerly agreed to prepare this, only imposing the condition that they visit for tea tomorrow. Marc's face right now, beaming and sparkling with joy, like a child in a candy store, is more than worth the preparations. Silently, he steps closer, placing a hand on Marc's shoulder. 

"Before I ask you, I want to clarify some things. Because it's important that you know them and understand them, about me, about us and about the decisions I made and that I hope you make as well." Dani lets his arm slide lower, draping it around Marc's waist and drops his head to Marc's shoulder. Before he continues, he takes a last deep breath and then he explains, his voice a little distant, his eyes fixed on the black box that might change his life. "The thing I want you to know, first and foremost, is that I am not asking you because I feel sorry or because I think I have to make up something. Neither do I think that I have to prove a point or show some kind of courage or whatever. I am not asking you because I feel obliged to. Or because I want to please you. Nor because I want to do you a favor." 

Dani pauses, catching his breath and throwing a sideways glance at Marc who is still eyeing the bed with watery eyes. "When you were in Australia and, very understandably horribly angry at me, I sat in your parents' living room with Marta and we talked and all throughout our conversation, I couldn't stop thinking about what Alex was about to do and I imagined how her eyes would light up when he did. And she sat there, and even just thinking about him or talking about him, she looked so gorgeous, so affectionate and then I realized that I knew her look - from the way that you look at me. The way you've always looked at me, like, even before anything happened between us." 

Dani needs another break, has to swallow down the nervous lump in his throat and this time, Marc turns his head, looking at him curiously - and affectionately. "So, in that moment, some pieces fell into the right places. I thought of Marta and Alex and how they never planned their relationship to go that way and now just adapt, reversing the "natural order" of things and it suits them perfectly. And I realized that I could have that, too, that it was all there, that I had already found the right person and that all the rest, right place, right time, right gender didn't matter anymore because I found you. I don't know if I ever manage to look at you that way, if I manage to make you feel as admired and needed and wanted as you make me feel, but I hope so, because I do and you should know that."

There are definitely tears on Marc's cheeks now and Dani has to stop again, blinking against the water in his own eyes and willing his voice to stay steady for that last bit he needs to get out. "Marc, you have confused me to know ends, you have made me question everything I thought I knew about myself and I am grateful that you did that. You have shown me the way to your heart and with it, to my own. You have long proven that you will be by my side on good and bad days. And I love you for that. I also love you because you are the most mature child I have ever met, because you are the most loyal friend I or anyone could wish for, because you are just the right amount of funny and serious, because you have morals and principles and because you are just you. And maybe a little bit because you're smoking hot."

Dani lets go of Marc, reaches for the box and opens it with shaky fingers. His heart is throbbing relentlessly again, his stomach is twisting unpleasantly and he doesn't dare to look at Marc right now, eyes glued to the silver piece of metal shining in the tiny box. "I want you in my life, for now and forever and I want to share everything with you. I need you, crave you and long for you and I want to ask you now, for the one and only reason that I am100 percent sure that you are the love of my life, if you, Marc Marquez de Alenta, will marry me?"

There's a brief pause and Dani looks up nervously, finding Marc's cheeks covered in tears and the younger riders lips trembling, but his eyes beaming down at him. And, relief washing over Dani like a tsunami, Marc nods. They're falling in an embrace, shivering against each other, holding each other until some composure has returned and Dani feels Marc pull away, sees him look at him with that broad smile. "Yes, Daniel Pedrosa Ramal , I do." With that, Dani feels Marc's lips on his.

They talk for a long time and finish the entire bottle of champagne. Marc listens to Dani's story of how he hurriedly had to run through Barcelona to find that ring, handing it to Marta who shipped it to Geneva and Dani tells him about the sweet Madame Blecourt and their tea invitation the next day. They talk about Marta and Alex and about how they will organize Marc's move and about Vale and Nicky who seem to have moved in together as well and about Jorge and Clara. They place bets on who will fight hardest to be their best man and they reminisce on the flight back to Europe. There's babbling, there's laughing, there's stolen kisses and shy, incredulous glances. For an instant, Marc's eyes fill with tears again when he finds the inscription of the ring. 

_93∞26_

They're both wound up from the past days and hours and they keep talking and drinking until the sun start dawning again, watching the sunrise from Dani's balcony. Dani feels Marc's hand under his shirt and Marc's head against his, the orange ball of fire slowly coming through the cloudy sky and suddenly, a deep fatigue crawls over him, making him yawn and sink against the younger rider. Under a haze of exhaustion, he barely feels Marc picking him up and carrying him to the bed and he's drifting away instantly, arm clinging to Marc and determined to never let go again.

_y parasiempre me parece mucho tiempo_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _and forever seems like a long time to me_


	48. Everything At Once

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't sure how to follow after that last chapter, which for me felt terribly intense to write and then I decided it should be followed with _this_  
>  Thank you all for the incredible feedback on this!!! ♥ ♥ ♥

It's past noon when they wake up, almost at the same time and once again fully clothed, limbs tangled. "Dani?" Marc props his head up on the older rider's chest, finally feeling more secure about touching him again. "Can we not tell anyone yet?"  
Dani's eyes fly open, staring at him. "Why?"  
"I kind of feel that it's Alex's and Marta's time now... I've taken so much attention away from him that-" Marc never gets to finish his sentence. Instead, Dani pulls him down and kisses him passionately, tongue flicking out, hand clutched to Marc's hair hips bucking up against Marc's, making the younger rider feel dizzy and overwhelmed. When Dani lets go of him, Marc is panting and still confused how he deserved that.  
"You. Are. The. Best. Brother. Ever." Dani gives him the answer, locking eyes with him. "That is the cutest thing. And sure, we have all the time in the world. Tell me when you're ready." Dani presses another kiss to his lips, but this time, it's a chaste one, still sending shivers down Marc's spine. Marc feels gratitude wash over him, for having the best, sweetest and most understanding boyfriend, _no, fiancé,_ in the entire world. With a huge smile, he wrestles with Dani until he is underneath the smaller rider, their bodies pressing against each other and his hands in Dani's hair. They exchange an intense look, an affirmation of what they're going to do, an invitation for the other to take what he wants, before their lips lock. There's nothing chaste about this kiss, their teeth gritting hard and their lips bleeding already. They're both hungry and greedy and between them, clumsy hands are doing their best to remove belts and jeans and boxers. They have to break apart briefly, because there's no other way to get rid of their shirts and Dani uses the occasion to fish for the lube in the bedside drawer.

Marc sees the tube and shakes his head, cringing. "I'm so sorry. But that Mile High thing made me so sore." Puzzled, he sees a devilish grin spread over Dani's face. "Well, in that case..." He never knew Dani's voice could sound so vicious and Marc cannot even process what is going on now when Dani, as usual surprisingly strong, turns them around, the older rider underneath him again this time. Marc is still trying to figure out how Dani managed to do that with one arm when it the other man's plan dawn upon him, his cock twitching instantly at the idea. As if he could read the question in Marc's eyes, Dani's legs wrap around his waist and pull him closer and with a small nod and a cheeky grin, Dani hands him the lube. Every last drop of blood in his system is rushing straight into Marc's lap now, the sight of a ruffled, vicious Dani Pedrosa teasingly licking his lips under him making him hold his breath. Then his head is pulled down and a low voice growls into his ear, "Take what is yours then."

It's too much hotness for Marc to handle, too much arousal to hold back anymore. He's devouring Dani's mouth now, his fingers shakily covering with lube and then pushing inside the smaller man, one by one but leaving much less time for adjustment then during their first attempt at role reversal. Dani doesn't seem to mind though, there's no whimpering or wincing only low moaning into their kiss and his fist tightly clenched in the flesh of Marc's shoulder. Marc lifts his head, breaking their kiss for air, his fingers still working Dani open, while he awes the way the older rider comes undone under him right now. His head has fallen back, his eyes squeezed shut now, lips parted and panting, silent moans coming out of his mouth. _And I am doing all of that._ Marc's mind is quick to go blank today and he pulls out soon, replacing his fingers with his cock. Way too soon, he is instinctively and roughly thrusting into Dani now, but Dani must be at least equally desperate, not complaining in the least but only moaning louder and louder under him, face looking beautifully space out. Marc's hand wraps around Dani's cock between them and then, he's driving both of them towards a quick and intense climax, that finally sees him collapsing over the beautifully disheveled man under him with a low groan. 

The room filled with their mutual panting, he pulls out accompanied by a disappointed wince from Dani and rolls to the side, away from the sticky mess between their stomachs and immediately cuddling up against Dani's small frame. "You're really mine now."  
Dani pulls him even closer and nods against his head. "Yes and you're never getting rid of me again."

Wordlessly, knowing what Dani wants or needs now Marc cleans both of them a little with the sheets and moves to pull up Dani, helping him into his shirt. They slide into their jeans, both cringing at the friction of the denim and, Marc wrapping a duvet around their shoulders, step out on the balcony. Dani looks at him very gratefully while he lights a cigarette and for the hundredth time, Marc marvels the older rider's profile, the hint of stubble on his cheeks, the puddles of mocha staring into the clear sky, the sensual way his lips close around the cigarette, the damp streaks of hair clinging to his forehead. Absentmindedly, he trails lines down Dani's forearm, only later realizing that it's actually the injured one. It's still amazing for him that it isn't in a cast anymore but only in a bandage that doesn't even cover it everywhere. Pondering on the miracle that Dani still has both arms at all, he draws his little patterns and then, suddenly, notices the lack of reaction in Dani and it makes his blood freeze. With the blood in his head rushing anxiously, he coughs and almost chokes before he manages to speak. "Dani, do you feel anything in your forearm, yet?"  
Dani doesn't look at him at all, he's staring straight at the ground. And Dani is shaking his head.

_As cool as a tree, as scary as the sea_  
 _As hot as fire, cold as ice_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am afraid I won't be writing with medical accuracy here... it's probably totally screwed but I don't really remember how it was for me and I don't really want to go and research that, sorry. :/


	49. More Than This

Dani hasn't told Marc everything about the last check up and he cringing now, not sure how to tell him. Finally, he just blurts it out, "You know... the nerves in my arm... they grow a about a millimeter a day."  
Marc's head jerks towards him, eyes wide. "So, how long?"  
"It's impossible to predict accurately, that's what I've been told," Dani swallows hard, "but a least another month, maybe two. And possibly another surgery after Valencia."  
Marc is staring at him and he's looking genuinely concerned. It's making Dani's heart melt and break at the same time, happy that Marc cares so much and sad that he cannot provide better news. The younger rider coughs nervously. "But then it will heal, right?"  
Dani sighs, full of frustration and resignation. After all, this is a nightmare, as much as Marc - thankfully - is keeping him distracted, it always stays in the back of his mind. "They won't say anything. It should heal, as in get back to normal, everyday usability. Beyond that, no-one wants to even make a prediction right now. It's uncertain if the mobility and strength will ever suffice for professional riding again. And... well, I'm already tiny and small and have a disadvantage with that I suppose, so if I'd lose more strength, I wouldn't be competitive anymore." Dani blinks against the tears and moves to sit on Marc's lap, leaning back against the taller rider.  
Marc's lips kiss the delicate skin behind his ear, his teeth nibble on Dani's earlobe and the smaller rider is shivering under the touch. Softly and with a sad undertone, Marc whispers, "You sound like you're giving up."  
With his working hand, Dani reaches for Marc's, lacing their fingers and his thumb running over the new piece of jewellery on Marc's hand. "I'm only trying to be realistic about my chances."  
With defiance in his voice, Marc growls, "Sounds more pessimistic to me."  
Dani sighs again. "Marc, let's not fight about this, please. And there's nothing to do about it now but let it heal."  
"When is your next appointment?" Marc asks after a while, lighting another cigarette for them. Dani feels a bit sorry about corrupting him, but he has to admit that Marc's perception is true, it looks kind of hot.  
Stealing a drag from Marc, he mumbles, "Monday after Valencia, in Barcelona."  
"We're going together, right?" Marc is squeezing his hand now.  
"Yes, that would be good." Dani inhales sharply. "I could use you there."  
After a while, Dani moves to sit between Marc's legs and after another cigarette, Marc suddenly asks, "Do you think there's a chance we'll start next season together?"  
There's a long pause, Marc's breath hot against his skin, Marc's fingers laced with his, Dani's mind swirling. Then, he clears his throat and, blinking against tears, replies, "Honestly? I don't know. At the moment, I'd be happy if we'd finish it together." Dani lets his head fall back against Marc's chest, who responds by wrapping his arm a bit tighter around his body. In his back, Dani can feel Marc's heartbeat and it's the most comforting feeling he can think of at the moment.

_I could feel at the time_  
 _There was no way of knowing_

Later that day, they skype with Alex and Marta, congratulating the young couple. It's Marc who, upon seeing them on screen, blurts out, "Wow, you're big." And Dani has to suppress a chuckle, while he roughly nudges Marc, Alex cringing into the camera and Marta simply flustered. She recovers quickly though and doesn't seem to take much offense. _Kid, you've been so lucky with this._ They laugh and giggle together and it's beautiful to see the two teenagers - and yes, they really still were teenagers - cuddle and flirt. The pride in Marta's eyes when she holds up the ring is such a beautiful sight. For Dani though, the best moment is when Marta holds up the stuffed and he gave her and Marc almost breaks into tears, his fingers reaching for the screen like a movie cliché. With all the excitement and all the smiles, Julia and Roser joining the conversation with beaming faces, Dani understands well why Marc wants the younger couple to have this to themselves at first. _They deserve their moment._

For the first time in a while, they both check out their social media accounts that afternoon, finding that a lot of attention has actually shifted towards Alex and Marta and judging by the pictures, they are almost reveling in the attention at the moment. There's even a set of pictures showing them during Alex's proposal in the airport's arrival zone, Alex on his knees, Marta's face lightened up and behind them, Julia secretly wiping a tear from his face. It's wonderful to look at and Dani sees the obvious emotion in Marc's face when he sees his younger brother like that. As far as the sudden influx of gay relationships in MotoGP is concerned, most news and magazines are rather quiet on it. There's a bit of speculation on his state of health and a bit of discussion on whether lovers could really battle fair on track but there's none of the plain hate he would have expected.

They also fulfill his promise of having tea with Madame Blecourt, who looks adorable when she picks up Marc's hand and scrutinizes the ring. And Marc's face during this is priceless. She is a truly sweet lady then, serving them tea and homemade cake, spoiling them and repeatedly mentioning how thin they were and that they really needed someone to look after them. When Marc explains to her that Dani is actually a great cook, she almost chokes on her cake. Dani cannot believe that she's open minded enough to embrace their obviously homosexual relationship but still she cannot mentally support the image of a man cooking. When they walk back to his house, both feeling like stuffed turkeys, their hands clasped and Marc's head on his shoulder, Dani realizes with surprise that being open and affectionate in public has become a normality for both of them so quickly. They've almost made it inside when Marc stops, pulls him down for a wet kiss and then stares at him, eyes full of enthusiasm. "Let's do a couple thing tonight. Let's just be an average, normal couple going out tonight. I wanted that from the moment we met and I'd love to do that now."  
There's thousands of reasons against it in Dani's head - but the way Marc smiles at him with puppy dog eyes is irresistible. "Fine, let's do it then."


	50. Ich Lass Für Dich Das Licht An - I'll Leave The Light On For You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Sorry for yesterday's emotional outburst (real life's being a ...) . Your feedback (all throughout the story) has been simply amazing ♥ and it does make me genuinely happy everyday ♥ and it's the main reason why this is still continuing ♥  
>  Also, I fixed the end of the bar scene/beginning of car sex. *blush***  
>  ~~Okay... so... I'm struggling with emotions in real life right now. It's making the writing somewhat tough because there's a lot more of "me" and my emotions in this than I'd sometimes like to admit. And I'm afraid the struggle is telling in quality and if it does, I'm really sorry. I've become so annoyed about that over the last nights, that I thought about just orphaning everything and never look back at it - which I obviously failed to do. Truth is, I still love them and I want to finish this the way it was supposed to end.~~  
>  Tl&dr: Sorry if it's not up to standards/expectations right now.

Marc beams, walking down the street in the evening light, the air cooling down already and the first shops starting to close. Before they had driven to the city, parking in one of the most central parking garages, they'd changed to accommodate for the weather - and maybe a bit to please each other. Marc had certainly picked his tightest jeans for a reason, and even the black leather jacket is not only his choice because of the cooler autumn air. And when he saw Dani in that tight black shirt and the equally dark jacket, he had been pretty sure that Dani had done the same. He certainly has the hottest boyfriend in town and he doesn't fail to notice that more than one woman (and man) looks after them with eyes more than a little interested. Between them, their hands are clasped tightly and possessively though, his head rests against Dani's and it probably looks like the most normal thing in the world, but it feels like a miracle. In the back of his head, he wonders whether Dani realizes that this is his first real date, ever. In fact, the youngest MotoGP champion in history is going out for a normal date to the movies for the first time in his life. Marc shakes his head briefly. He's unnaturally excited about it and he's determined to enjoy every second of it and to make every stupid cliché of such a night come true, because he has no idea when they will get another chance at this. It's departure for Valencia soon and then Barcelona for Dani's arm and then probably a load of publicity work and none if it will leave them much time to themselves, much less leave them time for such an activity as this. They slowly stroll through the city, finally oblivious to passers-by, occasionally stopping in front of a shop window to look at something, either with interest, or, as in the case of a particularly ugly pair of cowboy boots, to laugh. They discuss music, one of their favorite topics besides bikes and even stop in front of a toy store, pondering on the perfect gift for Alex's son, chuckling at the tiny electric motorcycles. Despite their original expectation, they've managed to agree on an action movie rather easily though Marc suspects Dani did leave him his will because the older rider suspected that this means more to Marc than to Dani in the end. The movie theatre is one of the modern ones, probably exchangeable with most others in big cities, but Marc kind of likes that because it makes everything more real, more like his teenie-ego had sometimes dreamt it to be like when he was again fighting against "teenager instincts" that didn't match well with a racing career. He had those stages, stages where a part of him craved to be more "normal", to fit in with other young people, to go out and have fun. Besides his natural obsession with motorcycling, It's been riders like Dani and Vale, icons of his sport, whose achievements kept him striving. And never would he have dared to imagine that one of these riders will be the one who finally takes him here.

The cashier raises a suspicious eyebrow when Dani pays for both of their tickets, but Marc sees Dani glare at her daringly and she quickly blushes and doesn't say a thing. Dani also treats him to popcorn, nachos and beer, creating the cliché version of the entire situation. For Marc, it's perfect and just what he had in mind and certainly just what he needed. With everything between them moving so rapidly, progressing at a speed that, even for him, is difficult to handle, it feels surprisingly nice to step back and do something slow. They slide in their seats and Marc is relieved that there are only a few other people scattered in the room. He picks popcorn with one hand, the other clasped with Dani's and they reminisce about that video shoot with the popcorn, making both of them grin. When the movie actually starts, Marc cuddles up against Dani, their heads against each other. For an instant, a painful sting of jealousy strikes right through Marc's guts because he suddenly wonders how many times Dani has done this before, with a girlfriend, taken her out, spoiled her, taken her home later. Luckily, the feeling is quickly forgotten when Dani pulls him in for wet, messy kiss and neither of them follows much of the movie's storyline after this. Actually, the world around them has stopped turning for the night, Marc thinks, because for once it's only going to be the two of them, no intrusion. Then, the credits roll off and they walk out, hands clasped again and Marc feels kind of disappointed that it's over already - except, it isn't. 

Once they're stood in front of the building, Dani rummaging for a cigarette, the older lighter absentmindedly mumbles, "You're not too tired, are you?"  
"Not at all, why?" Excitement floods right through Marc, his enthusiasm fully igniting.  
"There's a small bar close to here, I've been there a couple of times with friends. It's rather private and quiet. Want to give it a shot?" Dani looks at him expectantly.  
Marc nods eagerly. _This night is everything fifteen year old me ever wanted from life, I guess._ "I would love to."  
He follows Dani's lead, from the side marveling Dani's perfect face, that he has mentally mapped so many times now, every wrinkle, every line memorized, yet it never ceases to fascinate him.  
"Here we are." Dani points at an old-fashioned building with a very modern door and interior and the smaller rider opens and lets Marc go first, his arm around Marc's waist. _Well, seems that I'm the girl here._ Strangely, the thought doesn't bother him with Dani at all. With Jorge, he would have fought and battled to be the one in charge, with Dani, letting go of control seemed the most natural and easy thing in the world. They pick a small table at the window, no longer needing the security of the most hidden table when they went out and Dani ordered them an expensive bottle of Shiraz. _Together with the beer that'll make for a great evening._ "You're aware that neither of us will be allowed to drive after this?" Marc points at the glasses Dani just filled for them.  
To say Dani's smile now was devilish would be an understatement. "I have other plans for you," the older man says softly, picking up his wine. "Cheers," Dani lifts his glass now, still giving Marc that look and it makes Marc shiver, his cock even starting to take an interest.  
"Cheers," he presses out, a bit breathless, before adding, cheekily smiling himself now, "to an interesting evening and an even more intriguing night."  
It's definitely another cliché becoming real, a candle lit dark wooden table, the love of his life sitting opposite from him, exchanging coy smiles and nervous chuckles with him, their fingers laced on top of the table and their feet nudging under the table. After a bit of wine and a couple of cigarettes, Dani starts telling him a bit about his childhood, things still new to Marc and the rest of the world is completely tuned out now, while he is only focusing on Dani, watching the beautiful face and listening to the sound of his voice. It feels a bit like drowning in him. Marc's eyes rest on Dani's lips, dark red from the wine and when Dani's story of how he first started racing against his parents' will is finished, Marc leans over the table and presses a kiss on his mouth, no longer capable to hold back.

They have a good and long time at the bar, staying until the early morning, only them and a couple of heavy drinkers still left. The waiter has become somewhat of an ally over the course of the night and with the help of a genuine smile and a big tip, they manage to get a final bottle of Shiraz "to go", taking it along as they leave, the very first light of dawn already visible outside. The air is icy now and a light rain is drizzling, autumn definitely arrived and when he feels Dani shiver next to him, Marc takes his leather jacket and wraps it around Dani and his own shoulders, pulling the smaller right tightly against his side and resting his head on top of Dani's. He sees their breath against the freezing air and they hand the bottle back and forth, taking little sips of the wine. They're not speaking much anymore, their voices hoarse from the drinking and the cold air and Marc vaguely realizes that they're probably a bit too drunk to have a reasonable conversation right now anyway. Possibly, they're not walking very steadily either and they might be using each other to stay upright a bit. And it doesn't matter, because it's beautiful just the way it is. Until they arrive at the car and Marc stops cold, throwing a concerned look at Dani, suddenly a bit more sober, "What now? I can't drive and neither can you."  
The vicious smile returns to Dani's face immediately and he's holding up the back door, not the passenger or driver's door now and briefly, Marc thinks he's just confused. Then, he understands. His own face lighting up immediately, he shoves Dani inside, crawling on top of the other man greedily and their lips are locked tightly now, tongues battling and teeth gritting.

Still on top of Dani, their lips only parting reluctantly, Marc clumsily pulls on Dani's shirt, hurriedly tossing it and he feels Dani's hands under his V-Neck now, cool fingers against his hot skin, sending little waves of shivers down his body. They're both shirtless now, skin rubbing on skin while Marc bites down on Dani's neck, making the older rider moan. He's already shoving down their jeans, both of them half-hard and growing harder by the second from the greedy kisses on collarbones and throats, the twisting, licking and nibbling of nipples, the sucking on earlobes, the scratching over spines. Their encounter is more passionate, more urgent than usual and Marc's hand firmly wraps around both of their cocks, smearing their precome over the tips. They are gasping for air between their eager caresses and the sounds of their desperate moaning is filling the car along with the obscene noises of Marc's hand rubbing over their dicks, lubed with precome and spit. It is still very much in tune with Marc's teenage ideal of a night out, the despair, the secrecy, the haze of the alcohol, it's all that he would have imagined it to be - and a little more, because he's joining it with Dani, not with anyone, but with Dani Pedrosa the man he'd already admired then and whom he still admires endlessly today. When he opens his eyes to see him underneath him, he finds the sight breathtakingly beautiful, Dani's eyes rolling back, head against the backseat, his expression spaced out and his skin flushed, moans and swears falling from his mouths, along with pleas for him to be quicker, rougher, harder. Then, there's an extremely low, breathless growl. "Marc, please, so close. Marc!" It's hearing his name, from those hot and sexy lips, with that seductive voice, that incredible craving and demand in it, that makes Marc stumble over the edge, Dani following close behind, hot liquid mixing on their bare stomach. Their sweaty foreheads against each other, lips parted in heavy panting, Marc takes them through their climax, only stilling his movements when they're both safely floating on the worriless cloud of their afterglow. Their bodies flush are still flush against each other and Dani's breath is hot against the skin of Marc's cheeks, when Dani's arm reaches under the passenger seat, pulling up a woolen blanket. Marc pulls his head back, staring at Dani with surprise. "You planned this?"  
Smiling cheekily, Dani shrugs. "Maybe."  
And they both put their shirts back on, close their jeans and cuddle up under the blanket, Marc's head resting against Dani's chest now. "I can feel your heart beat," he whispers, a finger tracing patterns on Dani's arm.  
"It's beating for you." Dani chuckles behind him.  
"That's so cheesy," Marc laughs, too, pinching Dani's thigh.  
"I was under the impression that you liked cheesy and cliché tonight, though," Dani says after a while and Marc can hear that he's still grinning while he says it. And he also realizes, that without that he had said a word about it, Dani had known what the evening meant for him all along.  
"I did, actually. It was wonderful." He squeezes Dani's hand. "Thank you, for everything. It's like a dream coming true." And he chuckles again, realizing that he must have sounded incredibly mushy again.  
Behind him, Dani presses a kiss on his neck. "I'd do anything for you."  
And with a bit of "normal Marc" spirit returning, he turns his head, kisses Dani's lips and cheekily smiling returns, "I know."

_Die Morgenluft ist viel zu kalt_  
 _Und ich werde langsam heiser_  
 _Ich seh' nur dich im Tunnelblick_  
 _Und die Stadt wird langsam leiser_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _the morning air is much too cold/ my voice slowly getting hoarse now/ I see only you in tunnel view, the city slowly turning silent_


	51. Just Like Heaven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥  
> Thank you.   
> ♥
> 
> And well... this really doesn't have much plot. It just felt better this way.

The next morning comes with one of the worst hangovers in Dani's life, as not only his head is thumping, every muscle hurts, the backseat of a car proven to be an uncomfortable bed. On top of him, curled up against his chest, Marc looks as stricken as he feels, but after a few minutes in silence, Dani witnesses the most gorgeous smile spreading over the younger man's face. "That was so perfect." Marc leans up and kisses him, still tasting after the wine and Dani's move improves instantly, the joy on Marc's face irresistible.  
"I know.” Dani yawns openly. “Can you drive already?" For a moment, Marc hesitates and then nods slowly. "Yeah, I think I'll be okay. Well, maybe not if we're actually pulled over, but let's just hope for the best." He sees him shrug and then, all their muscles and bones stiff and achy, they get out and change to their regular seats, buttoning their jeans on the way. Dani doesn't fail to notice the stains and cannot suppress a chuckle. Stilling his movements, Marc turns his head, scrutinizing him questioningly.  
"Sorry. Just realized that after your cliché date you'll now be doing a cliché walk of shame. Maybe we should park up the street and walk by Madame Blecourt’s windows."  
Running a hand through his hair, Marc stares first at his then at Dani's jeans, realizing what he was talking about. Dani giggles openly now and after an instant of frowning, Marc joins him. Then, Marc drives them back home and Dani notices once again just how good the thought of it being THEIR home feels. And his instinctive trust in Marc and his driving abilities make his head drop against the car window and have him drifting away quickly.

He wakes up to Marc's finger gently tracing his jawline and his temples and he opens his eyes to the sight of his fiancé leaning over him, smiling with that affection that Dani knows is reserved for him and him only and Dani immediately reaches out to pull Marc closer, their lips locking for a gentle kiss.  
"Okay, sleepyhead, let's get you to the shower," Marc pulls back, still smiling at him broadly and Dani doesn't want the moment to stop, not ever, but he's shivering from being too cold and too tired and Marc is already next to his door, holding it open. And Marc's arm wraps around his waist as soon as he is out of the car, Dani leaning into the touch, cuddling against Marc's side even while they're walking inside, clinging to each other and unsteady. Being held by Marc is, at the end of the day, the safest feeling, the most natural feeling and the most comforting feeling he's ever known and Marc's arms are a place where not only does he feel sheltered from anything but where he can also just be himself, because one thing he's come to realize over the past weeks, Marc's look will always be full of affection, regardless what he's done, how he's done or if he's delivered results. Not that he hasn't enjoyed taking the lead last night, he has loved every second of it, but right now, tired, worn out and drained, it's more than great to just sink into Marc and let the other take charge. It's something, that until a couple of months ago, Dani would never have believed he would do in a relationship, but then, this is Marc, and everything is just a little bit different with Marc. Following the taller rider like in trance, he finds himself in front of the show, Marc letting go of his waist now to free him from his clothes. Standing there in only his underwear, shivering again, Dani watches Marc undress and he feels like he is under a haze, things slightly blurred and happening in slow motion. With hungry eyes, he devours Marc, studies his muscles move, his chest heave, eyes wandering over the perfectly flat stomach and to a slight bulge that makes Dani shiver even more. _I'm doing that to you. Even now, when we're hungover and ruffled and messy I'm still doing that to you... but then, you're doing just the same to me._ With shaky fingers, Dani frees himself from his boxer briefs, his eyes on Marc's twitching cock and slightly blushing over his own strained erection and they wordlessly stumble into the shower, tensing under the first, cold drops of water and then both slowly relaxing under the warming stream. They're standing with their bodies pressed against each other, tightly, from foreheads to feet and they don't speak and don't move, just stand there, eyes shut, rivulets of water pouring down on them and their bodies first warming and then heating up quickly.

It's an eternity before Dani moves, his fingers tracing a line down Marc's spine and despite the hot steam and the water, he can feel Marc shiver against him, melting into against his chest and when his fingers reach the small of his back, slowly and softly sliding lower, a very soft moan escapes the taller man's mouth while his fingers dig into Dani's shoulders, the sensations sending a wave of hotness through Dani's guts. Eyes still closed, his lips search Marc's, clumsily meeting them and then resting against them without moving for a moment, until they simultaneously part their lips and allow their tongues to meet. Their movements are slow and gentle and Dani thinks it's because they're both still under a veil of tiredness and hangover. Releasing the grip in his shoulder blades, Marc's hands move now, fingers brushing Dani's sides and making the smaller man shudder, before they finally rest on the small of his back, pressing their bodies even closer together, creating more friction and Dani lets out an involuntary, desperate whimper, his hips bucking forward and his hand clenching in Marc's biceps to steady himself. Their hips buck and jerk in rhythm now, their hands clenching in each other's skin, their lips mostly locked and only occasionally breaking apart to gasp for air, the hot water still streaming over them. After a while, Dani feels Marc lean against him, backing him against the cool tiles to keep both of them upright and they keep rutting against each other, with all the time in the world and an unprecedented patience. Rarely has Dani felt his climax build up so slowly, the tension accumulation in tiny but steady bits, piling up relentlessly into an unbearable knot, making him feel as if each and every vein, cell and pore in his system wants to explode. Their movements get more and more erratic and from the way he's breathing, Dani knows that Marc is as close as he is. When he slides his hand down, taking hold of both of them firmly, they collapse instantly, Marc growling his name and a string of swears pouring from Dani's lips.

Shuddering and panting, they lean against each other, allowing the water to cleanse them once again, before Dani feels Marc's arm reach out and turn the shower off. Slowly, he blinks his eyes open, finding Marc smiling right at him and there's so much warmth and love in that look that he just throws himself right at him, letting the taller man hold him tightly for a bit more until it gets too cold for them in their wet skin and he feels Marc gently pushing him out on the rug, wrapping a huge towel over him and drying him. _I used to object about being handled like this. But with you it's perfect._ Leaving Dani stand there with a towel around his shoulders, Marc dries himself quickly and then they crawl under the sheets, naked and cool, tangling their bodies for warmth and comfort and with their damp hair making wet spots on the immaculate white pillows. Both lying propped up on their sides, facing each other and hands laced between them, eyes locked in an intense gaze, Marc whispers, "We're home."  
He feels himself smile broadly and Dani squeezes Marc's hand, noticing the feel of the new piece of jewellery on Marc's finger. "Yes. Finally. Welcome to Switzerland."

They fall into a blissful, dreamless sleep, in the middle and the bright light of the day. Their legs and arms are tangled hopelessly, their faces so close that they feel each other breathe. There’s a deep and comforting peace that has fallen over them. Until they’re woken by the angry sound of one of their private phones, dropped carelessly to the floor and when Dani absentmindedly, half-asleep picks it up and puts in on speaker, a sobbing, broken voice mutters something incoherent, only the last part understandable for Dani’s spaced out mind. “I think I really messed things up.”

_Spinning on that dizzy edge_   
_I kissed his face and kissed his head_   
_And dreamed of all the different ways I had_   
_To make him glow_


	52. Ocean Full Of Tears

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brief chapter is brief again. Sorry, but angst is not my strong point and I can only deal with it in small servings.  
> Also, this more or less has the revelation everybody wanted and I hope you are okay with it. ♥  
> And... consider yourself slightly warned. It's not quite towel-alert yet but you might need the first tissue.

"Please, calm down. I'm trying to understand here. What happened then?"  
Marc wakes up to Dani mumbling soft appeasements and a hysterical crying and sobbing and to say that it confuses him isn't nearly enough. Full of confusion, he blinks, yawns and stretches, trying to figure out whether he is dreaming or awake and why Dani is comforting someone and who that someone is. He knows that voice, he really does. Underneath all the weeping and sniffing he makes out little fragments, things like "all my fault", "broke it" and "should have never done that" and then, the pieces in his head fall back in place, he knows whose voice it is and he is wide awake instantly, sitting up along with Dani and staring at the smaller rider helplessly mumbling anything remotely comforting into the phone in his hand. Marc thinks he should really be saying something, too, should be taking the phone from Dani and be of help here, but as much as he wants to and as much as Dani's eyes are pleading with him to do something, his brain refuses and he stays glued to the spot.

"But just to be clear on this... you weren't together when that happened?" Dani sighs audibly and Marc's heart stops beating for an instant, his hands grabbing fistfuls of sheets now.

"No, we weren't." With a bit less sobbing, Marc can now understand what's coming through the line a lot better.

"And you're absolutely sure that-" _Oh. Right. That._ Marc blushes and cringes.

"Yes, I am. Really."

"And nothing's going on anymore?" Dani's eyes are helplessly pleading with Marc's, urging him to intervene, but he's still frozen in place.

"Dani!"

"Okay, sorry. But then I don't see the problem."

"I don’t even know what the problem is. But I know that it's all fucked up now. It's only fighting and suspicions and anger and I don't think I can stay here any longer."

"Don't you think Roser and Julia should have a say about who stays where?"

"I'm old enough and I cannot stay here. Can I come stay with you?"

Marc's jaw drops instantly and he sees all colour vanish from Dani's sight. "Erm... you know... no, you know what? We'll come." Marc's fists clench tighter in the sheets. _I don't want to go. Even if I know we have to. But I want to stay here and have you for myself._ Marc pouts now, smiling when Dani reaches out with a finger to trace his lips and giving him a helpless shrug.

"Are you sure you are fit enough to do that?"

"Don't worry about us. And Marc's going to drive anyway." He sees Dani's wry smile and Marc frowns now and sighs, surrendering to his fate, because in the end, it's not like they have a choice.

"Okay. Thank you." Another sniff and more tears and Marc tunes out to Dani mumbling some final comforting words. Then, it's over and the phone is dropped back to the mattress and Dani stares at him, just as puzzled and shocked as Marc feels.

"We really should go, right?" Dani looks at him questioningly and Marc nods.

"Yes, of course we should, they need a good talking to, both of them. And you were perfect. Sorry I couldn't help and I'm so glad you knew just what to say." Marc leans forward, falling around Dani's neck and giving in to a chaste kiss.

"We have to pack, right? And we could go straight to Barcelona from there, then?" Dani breaks their kiss, giving him a very serious look now and Marc lowers his gaze and nods again, swallowing down a lump in his throat. 

"I wish something could be easy on us once," he blurts out, feeling let down and weighed down but Dani gives him a playful nudge and a cheeky grin. 

"You already have an easy time on the bike, at least you have a challenge left in real life."

An hour later they're already on the highway, heading straight towards Spain, having left wordlessly and both somewhere between shock and disappointment.

"What did she tell you before I woke up? How did he react?"

"As far as I understood under all the tears, he called her a whore and mother of a bastard and a lot worse and then left furiously for your grandparents house.

Marc cringes and frowns again, feeling an unprecedented anger towards Alex. _Never thought it would be like him to treat a woman like that._

"Do you think she's saying the truth?" Marc glances at Dani and sees him shrug.

"It's Marta. She won't lie. When she says it's only been casual and a couple of times and only when they weren't even a couple, then I think I believe her. It's nothing like her to cheat."

Marc nods to himself. It's certainly not. And although he can understood the first impulse, he doesn't understand Alex's reaction. In fact, he doesn't want to understand. All he knows is that Alex has been raised to do better than that. 

”Do you think they’ll manage?” Dani asks softly after a while and Marc feels the blood in his veins freeze and a wave of sadness washes over him when he shrugs now.

”I think they love each other. But I also think Alex has been behaving like an ass and I don’t know if either of them will ever forgive, they don’t seem like people who do forgiveness easily. I KNOW Alex doesn’t. He’s still angry at me because I ate his cereal and that’s been years. In the end, I don’t think they will have the slightest choice though. They’re responsible enough to understand that I hope.

With that, they fall silent, driving off into the sunset, soft rock music in the background. After a while, Marc stops for fuel and food and then, little crumbs of croissants fly to the floor and the memory of how they’d done that during their first drive together makes Marc smile. Finally.


	53. In The Cold, Cold Night

Dani remembers that first trip, opposite direction, Marc's visit in Switzerland and the young man's excitement about being allowed to drive his car - which is now not only the most normal thing in the world, but sadly also a necessity. And probably Marc is right and they should go to Barcelona next week, not wait another one until his appointment. The thing is, going to the doctor means facing reality. It means possibly hearing something he doesn't want to hear and isn't ready to hear. That's not an easy step to go - and without Marc, he wouldn't be doing it. With a sigh, he drops his head against the window, dozing away a bit every now and then, with the night falling down and when he is not sleeping, he's silently lost in thoughts and neither of them speaks, words not seeming necessary or appropriate at the moment. Marc's hand sometimes rests on his knee, squeezing him reassuringly, the material of the ring noticeable even through the denim of his jeans when Marc's fingers clench tightly enough and it makes Dani smile. _Never realized I am such a possessive person. But putting a ring on someone does feel quite good to me._ He wonders how Marta and Alex's issues feel for Marc. The bond between the brothers is one of the closest he has witnessed and he is pretty sure that Marc doesn't approve of Alex's behaviour at all. Although a part of Dani is very certain that Marc would react the same way in a similar situation. He feels sorry for Marta who must feel horribly alone in all of this and he wonders how Alex even found out about everything but he guesses they'll hear about that soon enough. They'd really wanted the weekend to themselves, they'd wanted to sleep and cook and eat and maybe even run together and just treasure those precious and rare hours that belonged only to them. In the end, it had cost them quite some effort to convince Honda, Emilio and Alberto to leave them those ten days before Valencia, in the knowledge that during that weekend and after Marc's official second crowning, they wouldn't be left alone for a while. But now, they're rapidly approaching the Spanish boarder and it's not for a pleasant occasion. The last time he went there, he'd been terrified to meet Roser and Julia, this time, they're already family and that's amazing. Dani doubts that their stay will be comfortable though and with a sigh, noticing how his thoughts are travelling in circles around the inevitable topic, keeping him from going back to sleep, he sits up a bit more straight and looks over to Marc, still astonished by the beauty of the face that has become so familiar in each and every detail now. 

"Did your parents reply to your text?" Marc's head jerks around, the younger rider giving him a surprised glance.  
"Hey, I thought you were asleep." _Oh, that affection in that voice._ It's a tone that makes Dani feel so warm, so loved, so sheltered. "They did, I saw it at the station already. They're glad we're coming, but worried about the driving at night. They'd have preferred us to sleep first." Marc chuckles before he continues, "They can't know how messed up our sleep rhythm has become lately."  
Dani laughs now, too, images of them sleeping fully dressed or in the middle of the day or in the back of a car floating in his mind. "I blame you for that though. You're the young one who's always ready to have a go at it."  
"Hey, loverboy," Marc nudges his side and is obviously feigning indignation. "It's not like you ever had problems to reciprocate."  
Dani grins and pokes Marc's ribs. "But that's only because you insist on looking smoking hot all the time. So, I'm innocent."  
"You sounded everything but innocent under that shower though." Marc chuckles and Dani blushes at the memory. Marc points to a sign for La Jonquera "Should we stop there? Final break before it gets serious?"  
"Definitely," Dani nods. _Last moment for us then._

It's a dark night with only a tiny moon and too cloudy to see many stars. The air is cool, a breeze blowing around them and they hide in their hoodies and lean against the front of the car, Dani lighting the obligatory cigarette. He is leaning against Marc, seeking the comfort of the other man's touch and he feels Marc's arm wrap around his back, Marc's hand digging into his side.  
"Do you think we'll ever just have some normal, quiet time together?" Marc's voice is a bit hoarse, probably from the cold air and Dani ponders on the question for a bit.  
"I don't know. Maybe once we're both retired from this? But then there'll still be Alex. And I guess Vale, he's never going to step back, is he?" Dani lets out a dry laugh and so does Marc.  
"No, probably not." Lanky fingers pick the cigarette from Dani's hand in the twilight, he watches Marc's lips close around it, eyes shut and then the smooth gesture when he hands it back, the brushing of their fingers sending shivers down Dani's spine. He watches the lines of smoke they're making and listens to the sounds of the engines of all the cars passing on the highway. They've done a fair share of road trips for the short time they've been dating. But they've come pretty far in those month anyway, considering the ring on Marc's hand and the key on his chain.  
Dani throws the cigarette on the ground and slides his hand into Marc's, lacing their fingers and squeezing and Marc pulls roughly pulls him into an embrace, lanky arms wrapped tightly around his neck and greedy lips devouring his mouth. Dani’s legs tremble, making him stumble against Marc who steadies them by leaning further back against the car, allowing Dani to prop himself up over him with his arm on the hood. It’s a long and messy kiss, their hips pressed against each other for friction already, both of them occasionally breaking it for air and because it feels like a last opportunity and they’re all by themselves in a far out corner of the parking lot, Dani dares to shove down Marc’s pants eventually, sinking to his knees and swallowing him down whole. A growled swear comes from Marc’s mouth and fingers clench in Dani’s hair relentlessly, while he treats Marc as expertly as he can, only a small part in the very back of his brain realizing what he’s doing here, blowing his boyfriend publicly. Marc comes quickly, the situation probably contributing and he pulls Dani up afterwards, looking at him with wide eyes and an incredulous smile.   
“I can’t believe you did that,” he gasps, before Dani feels his head being pulled down for another messy kiss. The next time they break apart, both of them panting still, Marc grins at him viciously. “You haven’t had anything from this yet.”  
Dani shrugs but Marc’s hand presses against his bulge, the younger man grinning devilishly and Dani whimpering now. “Go for it.” Marc growls and, to Dani’s utter shock, turns around, forearms on the hood now, half-naked bottom aimed right at him.   
“You’re kidding me,” Dani leans down, hissing straight into Marc’s ear, although his cock is taking a desperate interest in this right now.   
“I’m dead serious. If you can blow me out here, you may as well fuck me.”  
Dani blushes at the blunt offer, but he cannot deny his bodily reaction and after a brief internal debate, he shoves down his own pants and spits into his hand. “You sure you’re not too sore?”  
“Yes,” Marc growls impatiently now, his hips bucking back against Dani’s lap and Dani loses his self-control. He opens Marc, who winces and squirms briefly but quickly relaxes around his fingers, softly moaning when Dani finds the right spot. He doesn’t wait long before he pulls his hand back and replaces his fingers with his cock, the situation being arousing but also threatening and calling for a somewhat quick end. He greedily bites down on Marc’s neck, the man under him moaning and swearing beautifully and Dani’s self-restraint is not working well tonight, his rhythm relentless, but Marc doesn’t exactly complain. Instead, they’re both panting, cursing and bucking their hips desperately and it only takes a short time before they’re both stumbling over the edge, minds zoning out into oblivion.  
They recover quickly though, closing their pants still gasping for air and they silently make their way to the station’s bathroom, cleaning up in front of the basin. When they’re halfway presentable, Dani locks gazes with Marc in the mirror and takes the younger man’s hand.  
"Ready to go?"  
Mirroring a scene that happened weeks ago, only with their roles reversed, he hears Marc's voice, distant and soft, "No, never. But we can go now."

The rest of the drive is silence and once Marc has pulled into his family's driveway around 2 in the morning, they stay glued to their seats, fingers laced between them until Roser, who surely waited anxiously for the sound of their arrival holds the door open and they have to get out with a sigh. Dani walks behind Marc, letting him hug his mother first. "Hey boys, I'm so glad you made it."  
She hugs him, too, just like she did last time and he adores the easy acceptance, but he also notices the wariness in her face and the circles under her eyes, confirming that the past days at the Marquez's house haven't been easy on her. Marc tells her a bit about their time in Geneva, about Madame Blecourt and the drive today and she is again considerate enough not to ask about Dani's health. She takes them to the kitchen where Julia has been sitting with a glass of wine and now gets up to hug both of them, telling them how glad he is that they are there and then they sit around the kitchen table, the same table where they had so many nice time the first time Dani visited, but today, everybody intently stares at the table or their glass of wine and nobody speaks, only an occasional cough audible.   
"Where is Marta?" Marc clears his throat and speaks up first.  
"We send her to bed. She's exhausted with everything and she needs to rest." Roser takes a sip of her wine. "And your brother has been horrible with her."  
"Where is he?" Dani can hear the suppressed anger in Marc's voice and swallows hard.  
It's Julia who clears his throat now and answers, "Still at your grandparents'. And that's probably for the better, as long as he cannot control that temper."  
Marc hums in approval. "So, what exactly happened here?"   
Roser's eyes dart back and forth between the three men and then she sighs. "Let's talk about that tomorrow. It's too late now, we're all too tired." She is almost getting up from her chair, her hands already propped up on the edge of the table when she freezes and Dani traces her look and his heart stops beating when he realizes what caught her attention.  
"Marc," she presses out with a croaky voice, "you have a new ring."

_So don't fight it any longer_   
_Come to me again in the cold, cold night_


	54. Si te vas... / When you leave...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥ Thanks for the lovely feedback!!! Massively!!! This wouldn't be here without you. ♥  
> And if you're heavily pro-Bambi: skip this maybe :/ I'm a bit worried here. And to say it in Julia's words: "Trust me, everything will be alright."

Marc is praying, pleading and hoping for a hole to open up in the kitchen and swallow him. Now and fast. Or maybe it's just a dream. It's not happening though, his mother's eyes are still piercing him, his father's eyes are still piercing him and next to him, Dani has suddenly become even smaller than usual and Marc's eyes are darting back and forth between the three of them and the table, his mind desperately searching for the right words.  
"We were going to tell you." _But._  
"When? Before or after sending out the wedding invitations?" His mother's voice is dripping with sarcasm and Marc is wincing internally.  
"Listen, we just wanted to let Alex and Marta have some time to celebrate their engagement first." A wave of exhaustion floods him and he buries his head in his hands. _Why can't you just leave it at that? At least now? We all just had enough to face, right?_  
"Don't you think in your case this is different?" There is a lot of suppressed anger in his mother's voice and he sees his father's hand come to rest on her forearm, trying to keep her calm. Dani clears his throat, but Marc takes his hand, squeezes it, urging him not to get into this. _This has to be my battle._  
"Listen, we should all just go to sleep now and we can talk about it tomorrow, when everybody feels at least a bit better. I am sorry, but I have driven for so many hours, I am done." With that, he gets up and pulls Dani along, demonstrating that this is not up for discussion, but he feels his mother's glare even on his back and he knows that they're facing a difficult day.

Dani follows him upstairs wordlessly and they get ready for bed without speaking. When they've turned off the lights and hit the mattress like stones, he feels Dani cuddle up against his chest immediately and then hears his voice, muffled but still understandable, "How mad are they?"  
Marc runs his hands through Dani's hair, trying to comfort him and sighs softly. "I don't think they're mad. Probably just disappointed that we didn't tell them first. Don't worry."  
"I don't want them to be angry." He feels Dani's breath on his skin and it makes him shiver.  
"They're not. It's okay." _I hope._ Gently, Marc presses a kiss on the top of Dani's head, his arms wrapped around the other man tightly.  
"Sure?"  
"Sure." _Did that sound convincing?_ "Can we sleep now?"  
Dani hums approvingly and Marc slides down a bit, until their foreheads touch and he can press a delicate kiss on Dani's lips. "I love you, Dani."  
"Love you, too." Dani is slurring already and soon after, his own thoughts still running havoc in his mind, a slight snoring tells him that the older rider has already fallen asleep.

Marc spends a restless night, short periods of sleep alternating with longer periods of worrying and tossing and turning. Carefully, he disentangles from Dani when the first rays of sun poke through the shutters and silently pads to the kitchen, obviously the first one up. Sighing, he sits down with his coffee, staring into the mug as if the brown liquid, colour of Dani's eyes actually, could answer one of his many questions. Silent steps make his head jerk up, finding his father enter, face tired and worn, older than he knows him. "Hey, you made coffee, great."  
Marc nods and watches while his father pours himself a coffee and sits down across from him.  
"Congratulations!" Julia smiles tentatively and Marc first looks back confused, then sees his father point to the ring and blushes.  
"I'm sorry. No, we're sorry, we really meant waiting with telling you as a nice gesture."  
"Don't worry, I understand. Your mother understands, too. We're just worried that you're hurrying things, you know? You moving, that already was a really rushed idea and I guess, for us it's difficult to believe that you're ready for that step as well."  
Marc nods slowly. "Okay. I see." He inhales sharply. "We're sure though."  
He sees his father's lips twitch and then a smile spreads over his father's face, a wave relief washing over Marc. "I know, deep inside, we both know. You've always been like that, when you made a decision, you meant it. But bear with us, especially with your mom, losing both sons from the nest so soon is a bit much."  
 _Oh. I never even realized._ Swallowing down a lump in his throat, he whispers, "It will all be okay, right? Not just us, also Alex, right?"  
His father gets up and walks around the table, placing a hand on his shoulder. "I've always said it and I'll keep saying it, everything will be okay. Trust me?"  
Marc nods.  
"Good." His father holds up a pack of cigarettes. "I'm outside. And don't tell your mom, she thinks I quit." Marc chuckles at his dad's vicious grin and nods again, still feeling like a weight just has been lifted from his chest. His dad leaves, but he doesn't have the kitchen for himself for a long time, Marta's head suddenly popping through the door. Marc's heart drops at the sight of her sad face and she doesn't even reply when he says hi, only wordlessly makes herself a tea and sits down next to him, eyes fixed to the table. Overwhelmed with helplessness, he puts an arm around her shoulder and, relieved, notices that she relaxes under the touch, her head leaning against him. "Tell me what happened."  
"It's complicated."  
"I'm not as dumb as everyone probably tells you, so maybe I can still understand a bit?" He attempts humour and it works a bit. At least she lets out a brief chuckle.  
"Okay, so before the time when Alex and I started hooking up, I was seeing someone else, Javier, from the conservatory. We dated for a bit, then broke it off, that's about all that happened."  
"Apparently it's really difficult to comprehend? Because I don't see the problem in this that could result in a fight worth calling off an engagement and saying things you're sure to regret."  
"Well, Javier saw me on television, with Alex. And he found him on twitter and sent him a message saying that he, Javier, was the father of the baby."  
 _So Javier is a sick bastard._ "And Alex just believed that?"  
"Not initially. But then he sent pictures of us and Alex snapped."  
 _Fuck._ "Oh. But you told him, right?"  
"I tried, I really tried so hard but he wouldn't listen." From behind, Dani has entered the kitchen and he sits down, facing both of them now, raising an eyebrow and all he says is, "And?"  
They both look back, surprised at his silent entry and the sudden question. And Marta croaks, "What do you mean with and?"  
"I mean we've talked a bit before and I can tell by your voice that there's something else."  
Very softly, almost inaudibly, Marta whispers, "Javier and I only broke off in the beginning of April."  
It's Dani's turn to look confused now, but in Marc's head, the pieces start falling in the right places. "Around the races in Spain and France, that's what Alex told me...," he mumbles, almost as speaking to himself, Dani raising an eyebrow again. "And those were in the beginning of May. And if the baby is due by the end of January it's been conceived-"  
"By the end of April or beginning of May." Marta finishes the sentence for him.  
"Shit." And this time, he's not just thinking it to himself and he doesn't even care that Dani just kicked him under the table.  
That's pretty damned close. And he wants to ask something about that, wants to make sure that she is sure, but Dani is glaring at him so badly that he doesn't. Instead, he keeps holding her, exchanging helpless looks with Dani over the table, until she gets up, sniffs and wipes her eyes with the back of her hand. "Thank you for listening. And for not judging." With a tentative smile, she leaves and he notices that she's still moving gracefully, quite unusual for someone so obviously pregnant. 

He goes for a run with Dani after breakfast, trying to clear his head and at least doing a bit of the things they were going to do as a couple and they shower together, in no hurry, as well, because Marc feels that despite everything that's messed up in Cervera, his suffering fiancé also deserves some nice hours on this weekend. His mother is doing her best to keep throwing ice-cold looks at both of them, making things not exactly more pleasant, but after what his dad said this morning, at least he can kind of understand and he could tell Dani how to take her mood as well. At some point during the morning, it becomes inevitable for him to drive up to his grandparents' though, because someone has to talk to Alex. Now.  
His grandpa opens the door for him, visibly devastated and they don't speak much, Marc heading straight to the kitchen where Alex is sitting over a cup of coffee, staring at him with a wound expression. Marc tries comforting him, tries talking sense into him, tries reminding him of how he felt for Marta, tells him that Javier is just an idiot, that Marta wouldn't lie and that no, doctors do not blatantly miscalculate these things all the time. It's not working though and his attempts at getting Alex to come back with him, leave alone to apologize for what he had called her, go unheard. What he gets instead are glares and accusations and finally, a very loudly yelled, "Well, you go marry her if she's all so great. And you know what? If you're all siding with her anyway, I just don't want to talk to you."  
Marc inhales sharply. Leaning over the kitchen table, trying his best to keep his voice calm and steady, he presses out, "You KNOW what, Alex? This is not about anyone siding with you or Marta. This is about everyone siding with YOUR baby. And I don't care if you're old enough or not on paper, you'll just have to grow up and grow into this quickly now, so stop being an idiot and get out of here."  
Marc stands up, waiting for Alex to follow him, but his younger brother still glares at him, eyes ice-cold now. "Why don't you just fuck off, Marc? Go and have your high morals somewhere else, Mister youngest world champion. You're so much better than the rest of us, it's just amazing." Alex's voice is dripping with sarcasm and Marc is tempted to punch that vicious smile out of his face. Avoiding a major break down, he turns on his heels wordlessly, his grandpa pulling him into a silent hug, before he leaves the house. 

_Si te vas_  
 _me quedo en esta calle sin salida, sin salida._


	55. Nothing Else Matters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've started writing the second part of this about a hundred times right now and never managed to finish it. Before I break down over this completely, I'll just rip off the plaster now. That makes for a brief chapter and I'm sorry about that, but I think if I try to make this longer, I'll end up still not going all the way with it.

Dani remembers feeling perfectly at home at the Marquez' house. Even without Marc. Today though, he feels estranged and awkward, Marc's mother still throwing him cold looks, Marta hiding upstairs, crying a lot, Julia outside, supposedly hiding from the tension by occupying himself with gardening work. When he hears Marc park outside, his heart starts beating painfully fast and he feels so hopeful, but when he looks through the window and only one Marquez brother comes towards the front door and when he sees the expression on said brother's face, he knows it's worse than they thought.  
"Hey, how did it go?"  
"I've never been this angry at him ever. And he told me to fuck off." And that's all Marc tells him.  
The tension in the house grows unbearable.  
At least Dani manages to convince Marta to stay there for now, with the help of Julia who agrees that after what his son has broken, letting her stay would be the least he could do for her and his grandson and Dani doesn't fail to notice that Julia has not stopped calling him _his_ grandson.  
The rest of the weekend is a mix of walking through a minefield, trying to be silent and unseen, everybody tiptoeing around each other and avoiding company and sneaking out with Marc, running themselves free, joking and playing around and doing a great job at pretending everything is fine. They share exhausted, sweaty kisses, hidden behind shrubs and trees, along the lonely paths they use for training, paths that take them away from the horrible atmosphere at the family house where they've spent blissful times before and where everything seems to be in ruins now. And Dani doesn't care how many times Marc and Julia try to comfort him, cheer him up and convince him that Roser is not as mad as he thinks, he's seen her eyes and the way she looks at him and she hates him right now. Hates him for taking away her son. And he cannot even blame her, because if someone took away Marc's heart from him, he couldn't forgive them either. They don't try to talk to Alex anymore, as Marc refuses to talk to his brother, even after his grandpa calls and drops hints that Alex is breaking down and needs them. Dani is surprised at Marc's cold reaction, at the seemingly infinite anger, but he doesn't think it's the right time to inquire about that.

Then, it's Sunday and they leave for Barcelona, relieved at first, but a new kind of tension building up in the back of their heads. They stay in the familiar hotel, in a room they’ve spend quite some time in already. This night, they don’t have sex, they make love. There’s nothing rushed, nothing urgent and nothing about quick fun in their actions. All they do is aimed at being closer, ever so much closer to each other and dissolving into one another. Dani, more willingly than he would ever have thought he could do it, lets Marc take control. The younger man undresses both of them, slowly, tenderly and Dani shivers under the myriads of little kisses that Marc spreads over his body, not leaving out a single spot and he shudders under Marc’s touch, under the skilled fingers that brush over his ribs and down his thighs, the lanky fingers that run through his hair. Dani stays passive, only takes this time and hopes, no, knows, that Marc understands and is more than happy to give this to him. Dani’s hand is clenched in Marc’s hair, his mind only focused on Marc’s smell and Marc’s touch, feeling only the slight stretch when Marc opens him, slower than ever, dragging everything into endlessness. There’s no pain when Marc buries himself in Dani this time, only the comfortable knowledge that they’re inseparable now. Dani is clinging to every second of this as if he was holding on to his life and it’s the first time that he actually feels Marc come inside of him, sees the way Marc’s expression changes during that moment, the affection never vanishing from his eyes, not even when they roll back, his head dropping to his neck, his mouth moaning Dani’s name. Marc’s fingers wrap around his cock, building up a rhythm that lets him follow over the edge soon and it has rarely felt so good to sink into oblivion, to live in a world that only consists of stars, the sound of gasping and the smell of them and their love. Yet, the most beautiful dreams come to an end and their phones brutally wake them on Monday morning, dumping both of them on the hard ground of reality and although they didn’t have a drop of alcohol, Dani feels drunk and hungover from that night.

They walk into the same office they'd receive the first diagnosis in and Dani feels his hand slide into Marc's, but he is not moving it consciously, it's become a reflex. Marc squeezes back, tight enough to break his fingers and Dani feels his own heart beating its way out of his chest, feels his breath hitch and sweat covers his forehead now. The doctor comes in soon after them and both of their heads jerk up immediately. Dani doesn't like his expression at all and the grip on his hand instantly gets even tighter. Later, Dani will not remember anything else of the situation, not the sounds, not what he did, or what Marc did, not what the doctor looked like or if he even took a look at the doctor. All that he remembers is what was being said. And how, when it started with a sorry, part of him died inside, knowing where it would end. He doesn't even remember leaving the office. Or the hospital. The next thing on his memory is lying on the bed, his head in Marc's lap, Marc's hands on his back and silence. Everything is silent, the room, Marc and his own head. It's completely blank at first. Then, images of a tiny boy, a four year old boy, just having received his first PW50 and the feelings from then, the pride, the joy mixed with the butterflies in his stomach when it roared and he rode quicker than ever before. He remembers his parents cheering and the bright faces when he won his first race. And the decision, carved into his mind there and then, that he was going to become a MotoGP champion. It's the realization that he never did, never made it that far, that makes him break down, that makes his entire body shudder, waves of pain washing over him, a pain that transforms from emotional into physical ever so quickly. Marc's hands are there, somehow Marc is holding him, not just literally but also metaphorically, because it's Marc's presence, the soft words he mumbles, even if Dani's mind is not processing them right now, Marc's touch, the warmth of Marc's body, Marc's smell, it's all of these holding Dani in one piece right now, because he is sure without that, he would just scatter into crumbs. He doesn't remember crying, but the dryness of his eyes, the residue on his cheeks, the hoarseness of his voice suggest he did. And he realizes he hasn't stopped, he is still sobbing and he cannot stop and everything feels so strange now, like watching himself fall apart. Except that every time he thinks he’s bursting, there’s Marc’s voice and he doesn’t have to understand a thing to know that it’s worth fighting for.

_And nothing else matters_


	56. Bend And Break

It's possible, no, quite certainly, the longest day and night in Marc's life. He's lost track and count of time, watching over Dani who alternates between drifting away overly exhausted, restless sleep and desperate sobbing. And Marc remembers doing the same, remembers Alex and Jorge holding him. But for Dani it's worse, because when Marc was injured, there had always been hope, not a lot, but always a bit. Dani has been told that he WILL have to retire. Not that he MIGHT have to retire. Marc cannot even imagine what that means or what it feels like. He tries to, but it's too unthinkable, far beyond imagination. In his head, he tries to imagine Dani without being a professional rider and that's not even possible. There's no non-rider version of Dani Pedrosa. Marc feels a familiar defiance build up inside of his body and mind, the feeling that they'll show that doctor what's possible and what's not. He's gritting his teeth, fists clenched in the back of Dani's shirt and he listens to Dani's breathing, currently rather steady as the smaller rider has fallen asleep. The tears on Marc's face slowly dry, while he watches Dani's curled up body, Dani's head in his lap, Dani's legs against his, Dani's arm around his waist. _You're not giving up. You can cry until you're drained, I’ll let you have that, but then you'll get up and fight. I won't let you give up. Not now, not ever. And if I have to go and study medicine and then invent the surgery method myself. I promise you that you will beat my ass on track again._

The light of day slowly fades, the hotel room lit obscurely and Dani is stirring in his lap, but Marc cannot see his face well enough to judge if he's better. At least he's not sobbing though. And he remembers that they haven't had anything to eat or drink since breakfast. "Dani, is it okay if I go and get us some water?"  
There's no response but it feels as if Dani is nodding against his stomach so Marc carefully disentangles himself, turns on the bedside table's lamp and gets them something to drink. Dani even sits up when he turns back around. It's breaking and shattering Marc's heart to see him this way, smaller than usual, face stricken, red eyes. _I just want you to feel better. And I don't know how long I can take this without screaming anymore._ "Hey," he says helplessly, handing the water to Dani and sitting back down on the mattress, trying a tentative smile. His heart jumps when Dani does the same, lips twitching slightly upwards, hand taking the glass, their fingers brushing. He watches Dani drink and puts the glass back, still studying Dani's expression.  
"Join me on the balcony?", Dani asks with a very hoarse voice and Marc nods, already getting up and holding out a hand to pull Dani along. It's dark outside and they sit on the cool tiles of the balcony, backs against the floor length window and shoulders and legs against each other. They've been here before but it hasn't felt as hopeless as it does now then. Even the weather is playing along, significantly colder than during their previous stay and with drizzles of ice-cold rain that make Marc shiver in his soon damp hoodie.  
After a while in silence and finishing a number of cigarettes wordlessly, Dani clears his throat and squeezes Marc's hand, his head dropping to Marc's shoulder. "We have to call Alberto in the morning and tell him about the retirement. And Honda."  
Dani's voice sounded distant, absentminded and Marc cringes at the words, his fists clenching in Dani's shirt again. "No we're not calling Alberto or Honda. You're not giving up. I won't let you."  
He hasn't expected much of a reaction and quite certainly not this kind, Dani throwing himself at him, sitting on his legs, locking their lips and devouring him, hand clutching to his hair. After the initial surprise, Marc reciprocates eagerly, greedily and in the back of his head remembers how it was with Jorge, how doing this could make him feel alive again even if his body seemed numb and almost dead already. And his head falls back against the cool glass, Dani sucking on his throat and he's moaning desperately, memories, hopes, emotions flooding his veins, taking over his mind. They don't have sex on the balcony this night, they stick to their rough, wet kisses and Marc couldn't say why, maybe, because for this one night it's more about holding on to each other than to own each other? And that's why despite all the similarities to him and Jorge, it's still completely different.  
"I love you." It's a soft whisper, straight into his ear, Dani's hot breath sending another shiver down Marc's spine.  
"I love you, too." Marc runs his hands through Dani's hair, cupping the older rider's face. "Promise me you'll fight, okay?"  
He feels Dani nod and then he picks him up and takes him to bed, undressing both of them and wrapping them in the sheets, cool skin against cool skin. 

Pressing their bodies flush against each other from forehead to toes, Marc can feel Dani's heartbeat against his own chest, steadily and comforting. With his fingers, he draws lines and patterns on Dani's back now, absentmindedly and at the same time relaxing into the touch and the moment, dissolving into Dani's breath against his skin, Dani's smell in his nose, Dani's body heat warming him, the touch of Dani's fingers running through his hair. They spend an eternity like this, clawing to each other as if holding on to their last straws. It's dawning outside already when Marc is finally sure that Dani has fallen asleep and when he, for the first time that day, allows his own head to drop back on the pillow. He closes his eyes and his thoughts are immediately rushing through his head, jumping from Alex to Marta to Dani and back. It’s a heavy load of problems, it’s a situation that’s over his head, beyond his capacities and he hates the feeling of having no control, no power to change things. _And actually, I'm second time MotoGP champion, the youngest ever and I have a race next weekend and it's not even important anymore. And it's just weird how it's all so meaningless this year. I was bursting with joy and pride last year. Actually, I was like that after the last race. And now... I wouldn't even have to think about it if someone offered me to trade the title for a healthy Dani._

_If only I don’t suffocate_  
 _I’ll meet you in the morning when you wake_


	57. Breathe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... while I'm not sure how to proceed and I'm freaking out over the decisions to be made. For the time being, I came up with this. Procrastinating FTW ♥

They wake up almost at the same time, blinking their eyes open, yawning deliberately and then, very slowly, their looks freeze when the memories of yesterday crawl back into their heads. Dani stares at Marc and finds the younger man staring back at him, jaw slightly dropped. _Great. Now he'll pity me._ He's surprised, when Marc doesn't sound pitiful at all.  
"Want to drive up to the sea?"  
"You have to go to Valencia tomorrow."  
"WE have to go and our flights are booked already, for tomorrow, so for today, we will have all the time in the world to do just that."  
Dani shakes his head. "No." He sees Marc frown and quickly continues. "I want to ride."  
He sees Marc swallow and the younger man stares at him with a confused expression, mumbling a soft, "How?"  
"With you. Please." Dani's eyes plead with Marc's wordlessly and his heart thunders at the hesitancy in the younger rider's eyes.  
After an eternity, he hears Marc whisper, "Are you sure you will cope?"  
 _No, actually I'm not. And probably I won't. But I want to and I have to and I feel like I'll just die if we don't do this. And if I had anyone else to ask I would and I wouldn't have you involved, but you're the only person in the world who I can ask and who I'd ever allow to see myself so vulnerable. And please, please, please say yes._ Dani bites his lip and nods. _Shit. I'm lying to you._  
"Okay." He sees Marc nod and he feels the relief wash over him along with his guilt.

They shower and dress quickly and without many words. Dani notices the concerned looks Marc keeps giving him and he feels more and more guilty for dragging Marc into this. Marc swallows hard again, Dani can see it on his throat and then they leave for the car, Marc silently driving him to a friend who lives just outside the city and who provides them with helmets and a bike without questioning. Dani wonders how Marc even has friends outside the GP-circus, but obviously he does. And now they're standing here, in a driveway, facing the bike, helmets in hand and gazes locked intensely. Dani knows that Marc's eyes are asking him whether he is really, truly, full sure and after a while, some deep thoughts, some last deep breaths and swallowing down a lump, he nods. They get on the bike and Dani presses tightly against Marc, his helmet resting against Marc's and his hand clawed in Marc's T-Shirt. The younger rider starts the machine and them away, heading for some river. Dani doesn't notice anything around them anymore, he's completely focused on the sound and vibration from the bike, drowning in the feelings it's causing him. His eyes squeezed shut, his fingers clenching to Marc's clothes, he lets himself dissolve into the emotions, feeling himself being swallowed whole by everything. The roaring of the engine is flowing through his entire body, making his heart jump and his blood boil and with the fear that he will never ever be same rider he used to be come the tears, rolling out of his closed eyes, staining his cheeks under the helmet. He's not sobbing or weeping, they're just calm, silent, lonely droplets of tears, slowly running down his face.

When Marc stops the bike, Dani feels like he's waking up from a very deep dream, everything around him surreal and his vision blurred when he opens his eyes, finding that they stopped next to a beautiful riverside and that Marc, who has taken off his helmet already, is holding out a hand for him. With shaky legs, he climbs off the bike, taking the offered hand and then stands across from Marc, the younger rider's eyes piercing him concernedly. It's a challenge to take off the helmet with one hand but he manages, keeping his eyes on the ground now to avoid that Marc sees the stains of his tears. He just stands there, Marc only half an arm's length away and Dani's entire body shivers against his will. He hears a soft sigh and then feels himself pulled into Marc's arm, the other man taking the helmet from him and putting it down before both of his strong arms wrap closely around Dani's waist and his head nuzzles in Dani's arm. "I'm so sorry. I should never have taken you." Dani feels Marc's lips on his hair, making their way his ear, a gentle tongue licking his sensitive spots there and, under a haze of frustration, fear and resignation, he lifts his head up, his lips searching for Marc's, finally meeting violently. They ravish each other, eventually sinking to their knees, still in close embrace, their mouth against each other's still. Only every once in a while, they break apart for a bit of air, only lock again seconds after. A while later, the kisses get slower, more gentle, more careful, lighter, until their heads just rest against each other, lips slightly touching, both of them panting. Kneeling there, in the grass next to a lonely road, the first cold drops of rain falling onto their heads, Dani suddenly feels the jealousy crawl up, the feeling that it's unfair, that it's always him and that the entire world is against him. And suddenly, he's furious, without knowing with whom or what or why. 

And all you touch and all you see  
 _Is all your life will ever be_


	58. Wish You Were Here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Countdown to meltdown. And enjoy the smut, there won't be as much as usual for the next ones ;)

Of course, Marc notices that Dani is monosyllabic. But he cannot blame him. It still hurts though, because the usual fondness has vanished from Dani's eyes. They're cold and glaring and it hurts him. He tries his best to be supportive when they're back at the hotel, but Dani won't speak, won't eat, will hardly let him touch him. They're sprawled out on the bed, both on their backs, the room dark, when Dani mumbles, "I'm sorry."  
"It's okay." Marc reaches out in the dark, tentatively stroking over Dani's head and relieved to find that Dani not only lets him but even relaxes under the touch.

After a while in the dark, silent, only Marc's fingers in Dani's hair, Marc feels the mattress dip and then the older rider presses against him, their lips locking immediately, rough and demanding. The familiar taste of blood is lingering in Marc's mouth, the sudden closeness overwhelming him and drowning him. _Too much and I still want more._ Greedy fingers explore his skin and he reciprocates, his hands moving over Dani's back. When Dani's hand slides between them, pinching one of his nipples and then hovering down his sides, he cannot help whimpering and his head falls back into the pillow, Dani seizing the opportunity to suck on his throat. Marc is moaning helplessly now and Dani is far from stopping, instead, devouring him from head to toe. Now, Marc wouldn't say Dani hasn't been passionately before, but this is new. In the back of his head, he remembers it, remembers that despair causes this, knows that Dani is probably trying to feel alive here. Yet, coherent thinking is not his strongest point with Dani everywhere on and over him, feeling himself suffocate in Dani's touch and Dani's scent. 

Dani is not giving him a break, roughly kissing, biting, nibbling, licking every bit of his skin, their clothes long shed and Marc is only gasping and moaning, eyes squeezed shut, fists clenched in the sheets. Dani is moving and shuffling a bit and then Marc feels cool and slick fingers wrap around his cock, building up a fast rhythm and making him groan loudly. When Dani's mouth drops to his chest, tongue flicking over his nipples, his hips jerk up involuntarily and swears fall from his mouth. He hears Dani chuckle and then feels him take his hand, spreading lube over his fingers and he's briefly confused until Dani shoves his hand down and he feels where he's guided. And then he realizes where this is going and the prospect alone makes him moan again. With impatient fingers, he pushes against Dani's entrance now, as rough as Dani has been treating him and he makes his way past the tightly clenched muscles relentlessly, Dani sighing and whimpering in his ear. Tonight, he doesn't take much time opening him. It's a night for passionate sex, not one for gentle lovemaking and over him, Dani's whimpers turn into low and desperate moans when Marc curls his fingers. "Stop," Dani's presses it out, his voice husky and Marc withdraws, shivering at the obscene noise and Dani's quiet wincing. 

_You've come a long way pretty fast._ Marc is profoundly amazed by Dani's initiative and it's simply overwhelming when the smaller rider now props himself up over him, holding him in place and lining himself up against his cock. _You're really doing it. Wow._ Dani is sitting down on him, tight ring of muscles clenching around him and Marc feels himself buried and that hot, tight space, strings of swears and desperate moans and pleas falling from his mouth. "Oh god, Dani." His hands are digging into the flesh of Dani's hips, making the younger man ride him faster, harder and it feels so intense and so good and when Dani starts panting loudly now, growling in between, it becomes too much for Marc, his hands pulling and squeezing on Dani to make him move faster and then he takes one hand to finish Dani off roughly. It's the moment when Dani comes, screaming his name, hot come splattering on his stomach and over his hand and muscles clenching even tighter around him, where Marc falls over the edge, violently and with another string of swears.

It's been great and everything they've always done and when they fall asleep, their limbs tangled, their foreheads against each other, Marc finally feels as if it's going to work out. It's going to get better. Somehow, someway, sometime.

Then, they wake up. And the coldness is back in Dani's eyes. And the wordlessness. Everything feels tense for Marc, scarily tense, close to bursting. It makes him not want to speak, makes him want to run away and hide until it's better. But he cannot, obviously not. He knows and understands that he has to deal with it, be strong for Dani, comfort Dani and do whatever Dani needs. But it's breaking his heart, ripping it into pieces, shattering it into crumbs. In silence, they pack, they have breakfast, they take a taxi to the airport, they do it all together and still, all throughout, Marc feels as lonely as he rarely has before. Dani hardly looks at him and if he does, his eyes are wary, glaring or just tired. And when Marc desperately tries to clasp their hands, Dani always pulls away soon after. While their plane takes off, Dani staring straight out the window with a frozen expression on his face, Marc swallows against the lump in his throat, he blinks against the tears and he breathes against the twisted feeling in his guts. _You're right here but you’re not here and I miss you so much. Please come back to me. I miss you, you know?_

_How I wish, how I wish you were here._   
_The same old fears._   
_Wish you were here._


	59. Ain't that the way it always starts...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I think I found a coward's way out of this ;)  
> We'll leave the traditional "one chapter Dani-POV and one chapter Marc-POV" theme for a bit, I hope it's not overly confusing ♥  
> And I know... it's not Friday yet. But it's either posting it now or starting all over again.

_A simple round of conversation._  
 _Became a painful equation._

**Wednesday, 8 pm, room 1026**  
"YOU ARE AN IDIOT IF YOU BELIEVE THAT."  
"STOP YELLING."  
"YOU'RE YELLING YOURSELF AND NOW FUCK OFF, LIAR!"  
"THIS IS OUR ROOM! AND I DIDN'T LIE TO YOU."  
"I DON'T CARE! FUCK OFF! AND YEAH, YOU DID."  
"NO I WON'T AND I DIDN'T. AND I WOULD HAVE TOLD YOU. AND I WON'T LEAVE NOW, NOT UNTIL WE CAN SPEAK ABOUT THAT CALMLY."  
"WELL, THEN I HAVE TO LEAVE."  
"GO FOR IT."  
"I WILL."

_I'm the same as I was in your arms._

**Wednesday, 9 pm, room 1069**  
"He did what?"  
"Called her a whore and left."  
"Ouch."  
"Yeah, but that's not all."  
"What do you mean?"  
"I think his brother did something worse. Or might have done something worse."  
"Wait, what?"

_Don't you remember it was rain that drowned you._

**Wednesday, 10 pm, room 1000**  
"No, I haven't spoken to him."  
"You promised. You have to talk to him. Talk some sense into him."  
"I don't even know where to start though. He won't listen to me."  
"Oh please, are you kidding me? You just start. If I was there... I'd just yell."  
"You should be here. And you should be doing that."  
"He is your son as well."  
"I know but you're better at this kind of stuff."  
"What is this kind of stuff?"  
"Emotions and feelings and everything."  
"I don't want you to discuss emotions and feelings. I want you to go there and yell at him until his brain starts functioning properly again and he gets some grip on things as loyalty, honesty and responsibility. And from all that I'm hearing, you can then proceed and give his brother the same speech."  
"You heard that one, too?"  
"Yeah. One of the guys texted Marta and the poor girl told me. She's breaking down over everything again." 

_Memories keep haunting me._  
 _Help me chase them all away._

**Wednesday, 11 pm, room 1099**  
"No, you cannot stay here. I'm not even alone."  
"Don't be an ass."  
"How much did you drink?"  
"Doesn't matter. Let me in."  
"Get back to your room and fix it."  
"Nah. Never. He should not have done that."  
"Maybe. But you should not be here."  
"Let me in or I'll let the entire hotel listen to this."  
"Can you at least not throw up then?"  
"I won't promise. Do you have any drinks left in your minibar?"

_I don't care, it's all the same, watch it all go up in flames._

**Midnight, Hotel Bar**  
"You did WHAT?"  
"Since when is that his business?"  
"It's not. But why didn't you tell him?"  
"Because it's my decision."  
"Yes, but why didn't you tell him?"  
"Because he wouldn't let me."  
"And you couldn't talk?"  
"No. And I didn't want to talk. And anyway, shouldn't he understand?"  
"Let me be honest with you... I don't understand. If you love each other, shouldn't that mean you can talk about everything?"  
"Are you saying we don't love each other?"  
"No. But you're having issues."  
"Well, thanks, I kind of noticed that."

_Close your eyes, turn around._  
 _Help me burn this to the ground._

**Thursday, 1 am, room 1012**  
"I am not coming inside."  
"Don't be boring."  
"You're drunk."  
"So are you."  
"Your brother's going to kill me."  
"My brother can kiss my ass."  
"And you're almost married."  
"No I'm not."  
"Yes you are."  
"No I'm not. And I didn't start it."  
"Do you really think that matters now?"  
"Yes. And now come inside before everybody hears us."

_Don't say there's nothing more to say._

**Thursday, 2 am, room 1069**  
“So, he left?”  
“Yes.”  
“And now?”  
“He’ll come back.”  
“Okay. But why didn’t they talk?”  
“Don’t ask me. They’re kids. They have no idea what they’re doing.”  
“Did you find out where he went?”  
“Yes…”  
“And?”  
“Don’t freak out.”  
“I won’t.”  
“Guess then.”  
“No he didn’t.”  
“I’m afraid he did.”  
“Does that mean… they’re staying in the same room?”  
“Yes.”  
“For the night?”  
“Unless he changes his plans, yes.”  
“I take it back. I’m freaking out.” 

_Chase all of those memories away,_  
 _Save them all for another day._

**Thursday, 3 am, room 1026**  
“So, are you okay?”  
“No. Are you?”  
“No.”  
“I just don’t understand what he was thinking.”  
“Me neither. Guess we’re in the same boat then.”  
“True enough. I just want to kick some sense into them.”  
“I think Julia tried.”  
“I don’t think they’ll listen.”  
“I know. Can you cope?”  
“Not really, but I’ll have to. Don’t get to choose, do we?”  
“No, you’re right. And god, it’s so late already. I think you should rest. I feel bad about whining to you.”  
“Ah, don’t. We can whine together. And yeah, rest is probably good. For both us. I’ll hang up then.”  
“Yeah, goodnight.”  
“Goodnight.” 

_Use me up, spit me out,_  
 _Let me be your hand-me-down._

**Thursday, 4 am, room 1099**  
“I told you not to throw up.”  
“Sorry.”  
“Yeah. You should be. And you will be. Dammit, I can’t be your babysitter.”

_Shame, shame, go away_  
 _come again some other day._

**Thursday, 5 am, room 1012**  
“Shit.”  
“Huh?”  
“We didn’t… we DIDN’T, right?”  
“Erm… I’m not sure. I don’t know. I don’t remember.”  
“Try harder. Dammit. TELL ME THAT DIDN’T HAPPEN?”  
“Stop yelling, my head.”  
“I DON’T CARE ABOUT YOUR HEAD. JUST TELL ME THIS NEVER HAPPENED.”

_And when you said I couldn’t give you enough_  
 _I started giving you up._

**Thursday, 6 am, room 1026**  
“SO OUT OF ALL THE POSSIBILITIES, YOU SLEPT THERE?”  
“SORRY. STOP YELLING. AND NOTHING HAPPENED.”  
“I DON’T BELIEVE A WORD OF WHAT YOU’RE SAYING.”  
“DON’T BE STUPID. AND STOP YELLING.”  
“YOU’RE CALLING ME STUPID? I THINK YOU NEED TO FUCK OFF. NOW.”  


_Oh, God you gotta make it stop._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's not explicit on the characters and you won't be able to recognize everybody ;) But you can watch the room numbers for some hints.  
> The song is "Arlandria" (Foo Fighters).


	60. This Mess We're In

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, this has taken a while :/  
> There is no full revelation of the mystery yet. It's a fair chunk though ;) The rest will unfold slowly over the next updates at some point this weekend ♥  
> (If you're desperate to find out about something regarding those snippets from yesterday, feel free to stalk me at tumblr or livejournal, I just won't leave spoilers here ;) )

**Thursday, 7 am, room 1069**  
Vale is cuddled up against Nicky, Nicky's head nuzzled in the nape of his head, Nicky's hair tickling him. Everything is sound and peaceful. Until a banging on the door makes reality kick back in violently. He remembers what Dani told him. He remembers seeing Marc stumble into Jorge's room and he remembers sitting at the hotel bar, listening to Dani and from the corner of his eye, seeing the way Alex and Alvaro were looking at each other. And although he didn't drink a drop of alcohol during that night, which has felt like one of the longest in his entire life, he feels incredibly sick at the thoughts and memories in his head. _That’s just all so messed up._ The banging won't stop and Vale is once again jealous of Nicky's ability to sleep through anything. With a deep sigh, he disentangles from his boyfriend and the sheets and walks towards the door. "Who is it?"  
"Jorge."  
"Go away." Valentino frowns at the door, anger flooding his veins. _How dare you show up here?_  
"It's not what it looked like, okay? Open the damned door."  
The Italian doesn't want to deal with it, really not. But then, he doesn't have much of a choice unless he wants the entire hotel to listen to their conversation. He looks down on himself, glancing over his boxer briefs and the white T-Shirt and then shrugging, knowing that Jorge has seen him in worse conditions. Rubbing his sleepy eyes, he opens the door and lets in a very tired and worn out - looking Jorge Lorenzo, wearing track bottoms and a black shirt, sunglasses in his hair and dark circles around his eyes. Pointing at the still sleeping American in the sheets, Vale pulls on Jorge's arm, dragging him out on the balcony. 

Standing outside, facing each other and glaring, it's Jorge, who coughs briefly and then starts speaking. "Listen, I know you saw Marc in front of my room last night." Valentino nods, still glaring. "It's not what you think, okay? Man, Clara is here and I certainly didn't let him in for that."  
Valentino tilts his head, the glare replaced by a confused expression now, realization striking hard. _When Clara is here... then that's probably true and you didn't... though I doubt that Dani will believe you for a second._  
"So Marc didn't cheat on Dani?" Vale holds out a box of cigarettes and Jorge takes one, lighting it and then lighting the one Vale took as well and they both sit down in a chair, next to each other and watch the horizon.  
"No." Jorge shakes his head and Vale follows him interestedly now. "He didn't. He was horribly drunk and muttered something about Dani not trusting him and giving up everything, but he wasn't exactly communicating well." Jorge shrugs and Vale just nods, watching the smoke of their cigarettes dissolve into the air.  
"Yeah, I think I know what he meant though," the Italian sighs after a while, putting together the pieces, things falling into place in his head finally.  
"You do?" Jorge sounds surprised.  
"Yeah. I talked to Dani."  
"I know, I saw you."  
"Yeah, Dani saw you, too." Vale cannot help the harsh sound in his voice.  
"Shit," Jorge blurts out and Valentino thinks the Spanish rider is blushing.  
"Exactly. You'll have a harder time convincing him. Anyway..." Vale fishes for his phone, opening an article and handing it over to Jorge. "This is what Dani did and he didn't bother discussing it with Marc, it seems."  
With a distant voice, Jorge reads a bit of it loud, eyes widened, " _Spanish MotoGP rider Dani Pedrosa declares retirement due to permanent damage of right arm._ " Valentino swallows, the sound of the words when they're actually spoken out loud terrifying him and he sees Jorge turn his head towards him, still clawing the phone, expression shocked. "That's why they fought?"  
Valentino nods, not knowing what to say and they sit in silence for a moment before he clears his throat and begins telling everything he knows. "Yes, that's what happened. Apparently, Marc has begged Dani to wait, to look for alternative treatments and to just not do anything before Valencia is over and Dani felt that it wasn't Marc's decision and not even Marc's business and called Alberto anyway. Obviously, Marc didn't take the news well, they fought and yelled and at some point, Marc stormed off and after we saw you in the hallway with him, Dani is well aware he spent the night with you. I guess you can figure?"  
Silence falls on them once again, both of them finishing another cigarette. With a sideways glance, Vale studies Jorge, surprised to find him looking genuinely devastated. _I never thought you'd care._  
"Did you know about Dani?" Jorge's voice sounds hoarse.  
"No," Vale replies softly, still feeling incredulous about the news, "he never said a word. He's heartbroken though. But you know… it’s strange, it really felt as if he was more upset because of Marc than because of his arm."  
"And Marc just left him to himself," Jorge whispers absentmindedly and Vale swallows down a lump in his throat. _Yes. But I don't blame him._  
"How would you feel or react if your fiancé made such a decision without even speaking to you?” He says calmly. “It's not exactly a demonstration of trust and loyalty."  
Jorge stares at him, mouth gaping, eyes widened almost comically and Vale wonders, what he said that was so shocking. Jorge coughs and then croaks, "Fiancé?"  
 _Shit. I guess Marc didn't tell you._  
With a hoarse voice, Vale presses out, “Yes. Apparently that happened after the last race.” And the memory of what else happened after that race and that party makes Vale blush.  
“Why do they hurry everything?” Jorge sounds irritated and Vale shrugs.  
“Because they love each other.” A yawning Nicky steps out to join them, both of their heads jerking towards the door. Nicky stretches and Vale gulps, his boyfriend in only a pair of boxers, toned chest shimmering in the morning sun, lean muscles playing seemingly only for him – it’s a bit much for such a morning, with Jorge on their balcony and he hastily takes his eyes away, focusing on taking out another cigarette, handing the package over to Nicky afterwards. _These kids will make a chain smoker out of me._  
“Thanks.” Nicky hands him the lighter back, their fingers brushing just a bit too long and Vale shivers and in the corner of his eye, sees Jorge study them and the Spanish rider smiles at their behaviour. “So,” Nicky leans over the railing, presenting his beautiful backside now, before he continues with an absentminded voice, “Any news from Alex then?”  
“Alex?” Jorge raises an eyebrow.  
“How much have you heard so far?” Vale asks calmly.  
“Well, we heard that Marta and Alex have problems. She mentioned it to Clara, but she didn’t make it sound that serious.” Nicky snorts and Vale cringes. _What an understatement. Though it seems typical for Marta, trying not to worry anyone._  
“Well,” Valentino clears his throat and continues, “the not so serious problem involves Alex accusing her of cheating, of saying the baby isn’t his, calling her bad names, moving to his grandparents’ house and, if last night is anything to go by, drowning his frustrations with alcohol.” _And Alvaro Bautista. But I won’t tell you about that. Not even Nicky._  
There’s another moment of silence, the three of them lost in thoughts and staring across sky.  
“If I were Julia, I’d go prematurely bold.” Jorge whispers, sounding as if he’s speaking to himself. “I think I’d better go then. You think there’s any point in talking to Dani?”  
“No,” Vale shakes his head. “Not now.”

Jorge leaves without further words and Valentino slowly gets up from the chair, moving to stand next to Nicky, leaning over the railing as well now and draping an arm around the small of Nicky’s back. “Promise me you’ll never do that.” He nuzzles his head in Nicky’s neck and kisses him, feeling the American shudder under his touch.  
“Do what?”  
“I don’t know… everything. Refuse to talk to me about important stuff, call me names, sleep in your ex’s hotel room. Leave me alone when I need you most. Just promise me you’ll be there, not matter how nasty I become.” Valentino leans his head against Nicky’s, breathing in the familiar smell of Nicky, his after shave and cigarette smoke.  
“I promise,” Nicky whispers and then moves to pull him into an embrace and Vale melts under the touch, finally feeling a bit sheltered from all the hard-to-digest news of the last few hours.

_We sit in silence_  
 _No need for words now_  
 _The sin and_  
 _This mess we're in_


	61. Come up to meet you...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not really comfortable with causing anyone pain. Not even fictional characters. So I apologize in advance for a collection of brief and raw chapters, that to me feel like ripping off a giant plaster. :/  
> Also, POV is still messy (things won't go back to "normal" until the "Nicky-chapter", I think).  
> Thank you all for the INCREDIBLE feedback on this!!! ♥ ♥ ♥

_...tell you I'm sorry_

**Thursday, 7 am, Room 1026**  
Marc knocks on their, well, now it's somehow more Dani's, door, again. When he doesn't even get a reply, he slides the keycard and, his heart pounding its way out of his chests and his legs trembling, he stumbles inside only to freeze on the spot.  
"What are you doing?" Marc feels physical pain when he takes in the sight in front of him, half packed bags, Dani coming from the bathroom with his toothbrush and shampoo in hand. _Oh my God. I'm not ready for that. I'm so angry at you but I'm also so sorry for what you think right now, so, so sorry. Please don't leave me._ Part of him wants to yell at Dani, still, another part wants to fall to his knees and beg for forgiveness and the two emotions are pulling on him strongly, threatening to tear him apart, ripping on his heart. All the while, his eyes are fixed on Dani, a little bit like a rabbit in front of a snake and despite the tiredness and the red eyes, Marc cannot help but feeling overwhelmed with love and affection when he looks at the ruffled head in front of him. _I love you._

_Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me_

Dani stops in the bathroom door, eyes on Marc, waves of anger flooding through his veins, but his heart still breaking over the pain on Marc's face. He swallows, several times, trying not to cry and without an idea what to say. Their gazes stay locked for a long time, neither moving, neither speaking and Dani notices the tears in Marc's reddened eyes, notices the dark circles. He hears the younger rider clear his throat.  
"Nothing happened, Dani. He's here with Clara." _Is he? And that's supposed to make me feel better? Because you know what? You still ran out on me and you still went straight to HIM of all people._ Marc coughs and continues. "Dani, why didn't you tell me? I mean... suddenly you weren't really there anymore. You wouldn't talk. Why? I thought we trust each other." There's so much pain in that broken voice, so much despair and such a huge implication, a giant accusation, that it physically hits him, making Dani stumble back to lean against the wall. 

_Oh and I rush to the start_

"You want to know why?" Dani is speaking with a calm and steady voice, but Marc hears the suppressed anger underneath it. And Marc wills his body not to fail him now, eyes still holding Dani's gaze and listening to Dani's words, his mind slow on the intake and shock and disbelief flooding through him when he finally processes what Dani is saying. "Because you wouldn't have listened. You wouldn't really listen. You would just keep going, keep telling me we would find a way, keep making me all these hopes that will probably run nowhere, fade into nothing. I will not race again and all these hopes that then crash eventually are breaking my heart, they're wearing me out and I can't take it anymore. I just want out of that rollercoaster, Marc. I'm not like you, I've never been like you and life has never treated me the way it's treating you. I'm fighting, I have been fighting for everything. For you, it's all a gift, for me it's salary. And I can't believe you ran out on me. You left me alone. Like, no matter how mad you were, you left me BY MYSELF. IN SUCH A SITUATION." _I know. And I can't believe I did that. But I can't believe you think that either. I can't believe you don't trust me._

_Running in circles, chasing our tails_

Dani takes a deep breath, gathering his strength and focus and blurting out the one thing, that's really scorching him from the inside right now. "And you know what? Whether Clara is here or not and whether you guys fucked or not, the fact alone that you ran straight to Jorge, that fact is enough to tell anything and everything. Because you know what I think? You went there to fuck Jorge. Or let him fuck you. That's why you knocked at that door. And I don't care whether you got what you wanted, I care that you wanted it." Another sharp inhale, his fists clenched so tightly now that his knuckles are white and Dani needs all his strength to not yell pathetically now. "And if I'm wrong on this, prove it. Show me. Look me in the eyes and tell me to my face that you did not knock on Jorge Lorenzo's door because you wanted sex."

_Nobody said it was easy_  
 _No one ever said it would be so hard_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song = The Scientist by Coldplay (I don't like the original, but a contestant on a German casting something, Thorunn Egilsdottir, made a recording that I actually like quite a bit).


	62. Love The Way You Lie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brief is not a good sign, I suppose. But it's partly because of the song and how much I could or couldn't do with it and how much I really, really wanted this.  
> Thank you for the feedback!!! It's helping massively right now ♥

_Just gonna stand there and watch me burn_   
_that's alright because I love the way it hurts_

**Thursday, 7.30 am, Room 1026**  
Marc's eyes stay on Dani's, but he doesn't answer. It's not because he couldn't, it's because he is so furious right now that he doesn't want to. All he would do would be yelling, screaming, accusing, fighting. Or walk over there and punch him. Instead, he clenches his hands in the waistband of his jeans and stares at Dani, daring the other to say anything else. There has been silence between them before, quite often actually. And it's been comfortable, it's been awkward, it's been tense, even feeling close to bursting. Nothing of that compares to this moment, nothing Marc has experienced in his life compares to this standoff. He's a professional motorcycle rider, he's almost died during races, he's seen his boyfriend almost die, he's heard his boyfriend receive the worst diagnosis that could have been made. Yet, he's never felt like this, with the weight of thousands of rocks pressing on his chest, his heart seemingly not beating anymore, his pulse racing, his throat feeling too tight to breathe and every muscle of his body tense and shivering. He's gritting his teeth so hard that he's afraid his jaw will break and his mind is in a state blank from anger and disappointment, too far gone to even realize whether he is hot or cold right now. It's every bit of a wild west duel - only that it's the first one who moves who will lose. In his still angered state of mind, memories start flooding, inconveniently at the moment, images of their good times, of stolen kisses, of that very first kiss, of their first nap in his room, that moment in the hospital when they woke up to their surrogate family around them, Dani on his knees for him. And then he sees Dani's eyes right now, glaring, angry, full of disgust. _If you really think THAT then we're over._ Marc swallows and he feels tears dwell in his eyes, but he doesn't lower his gaze, he doesn't back out. 

_Just gonna stand there and watch me cry_   
_that's alright because I love the way you lie_

Dani waits. His heart and soul are begging for a sign, for a word from Marc, for an explanation. Any explanation. He would probably pretend to believe it. He wants to believe that nothing changed and nothing happened. And then he notices that it's taking Marc too long to answer and in fact, he thinks, that is an answer. It's the one response that crushes his heart, that makes him feels as if he's exploding on the inside, suffocating from the emotional pain. Marc doesn't even look away, he's still piercing him and Dani wills himself to stay upright, to control his trembling legs and to hold that gaze, that painfully scrutinizing gaze. Memories of better days are running through his head, of Marc's face lighting up in that movie theatre, of the once omnipresent affection in Marc's eyes, of that night in his kitchen that once and for all changed him and his view of himself. His eyes fill with tears against his will and he bites down on his lower lip, trying to suppress the inevitable. He cannot stop the droplets from running over his cheeks though and his cheeks are burning underneath. Of course, it's no different for Marc, they're both staring at each other, crying and it's so pathetic, so unnecessary and Dani wonders, when this has gone downhill, where pride and prejudice started to matter and how they lost everything they ever had so quickly. His stomach twists unpleasantly and he when he feels like he is losing control over his legs as well, he surrenders, lowering his gaze and moving towards the bed, bending down to stuff his toothbrush and shampoo into his bag. Closing the zipper of his last piece of luggage feels like an overwhelmingly definite gesture.


	63. Down In A Hole

_Down in a hole, feelin so small_  
 _Down in a hole, losin my soul_

**Thursday, 8 am, Room 1012**  
For the past hour, Alex has been staring at his phone. Alvaro is long gone, an awkward goodbye exchanged in the knowledge that they won't be looking each other in the eye for a while anymore. Now, he needs to call Marta. Something he should have done a week ago and he knows that, from a rational perspective. From an irrational point of view, he still thinks she should have been the one who told him. She should have said something, right on the day when she told him she was pregnant. And he still thinks he would have deserved more backup, he feels let down by Marc and his parents, although he understands Marc's argument that they're not siding with anyone but the baby. _My son._ Against their belief, he doesn't doubt his paternity. That's not the issue. It's not like he thinks Marta would lie about that. Not at all. It's because she never mentioned Javier. And first and foremost, it's because he's incredibly jealous. In fact, Javier could provide Marta with everything that he, Alex, is lacking so badly. Javier is older, more mature, settled, with an own apartment, an idea about a real job and real life and an understanding of everyday organization. Javier is also always available, never travelling to the furthest corners for a race and also not going to attract herds of paparazzi. That's what Alex's problem comes down to.

Once more he starts dialing her number, only to hang up immediately, before the line has even started building up. Memories of last night flash up in his head, drinks, too many drinks, and stumbling through the lobby, Alvaro steadying him. Alvaro smelled so good, that was what had made him snap, wasn't it? They'd also seen Dani and Vale, having drinks at the bar. _I wonder if Marc was just tired?_ And Dani looked horrible. Understandable though, because as his phone already told him via various twitter messages, Dani had retired. That made Marc's absence even less explainable. Despite all the anger towards his older brother, this seems worrying. Alex knows they're going through a rough patch as brothers, but they'll heal, they always do. And he wants to see Marc happy, which he is as long as he is with Dani. So he's really, really desperately hoping that there's a logical reason for Marc not going to the bar - and that this reason is not what it looks like. 

Alex gulps slightly, contemplating over his phone again. The strangest thing about all the trouble, the grief and the sorrow is that he hasn't had a second to think about the championship. He could well end up Moto3 champion on Sunday - and so far, he hasn't spent a second thinking about it. Actually, that's not even a bad thing in itself. It's kind of nice for his nerves. With a deep sigh, he flops down on the mattress, splayed out on his back now. He scrolls through the messages on the phone, stopping at one that he got a few days ago. _I am really angry at you and I think you know that. But I love you and I hope you know that, too. We love you. Let us know when you are ready._ Is he ready? Truth is, he doesn't know. Maybe he is just too young for all of this in the first place? Although it's probably too late to worry about that. With another sigh, he starts flicking through the pictures, many of them showing Marta. "You've got good taste in women." They'd all said that, Marc, Dani, Vale, even Nicky. And it had made him proud, because for most of his life, he'd only been Marc's brother, but suddenly, he'd been his own character. In the media, in the paddock, at home. His eyes rest on an older photo of his ... well... he doesn't know what she is right now. Her hair is glowing in the photograph, bright red lips smiling broadly, beautiful dark green eyes. Pretty, cute, sweet and kind. His mother's words. And whatever they are, she is the mother of his child and will always be. Slowly, he scrolls further, until he comes to selfie with both of them, Marta already pregnant and their hands wrapped around the beginning bump. He looks at their laced fingers, remembers the feeling of the baby bump, how it felt when their son moved against his hand and while he drags a somewhat rumpled ultrasound pic from his wallet, he feels the tears dwell up. It's the first time since they fought that he cries and it's a desperate, loud and helpless sobbing, shaking his entire body. He feels so sorry right now, that the shame won't even let him call her. And the dull pain in his lower body reminds him that he's done inexplicable and inexcusable things and that he will never be able to look in her eyes or those of his son ever again.

_Down in a hole, feelin so small_  
 _Down in a hole, outta control_


	64. Mach Die Augen Zu - Close Your Eyes

**Thursday, 7.45 am, Room 1026**  
The rustling, the sound of the zipper, it's been the closing curtain, Marc thinks to himself. With the back of his hand, he wipes away the tears and then keeps staring at Dani. His eyes are pleading, begging Dani not to leave, asking Dani to stay, but he can see that it's not working. He can read Dani well enough to understand that the older rider has made his decision already. In his mind, he memorizes the image in front of him, Dani in his dark jeans and the white hoodie, face worn out and hair disheveled and still more beautiful than ever, despite the sadness in the reddened eyes that is crushing the younger rider's heart.

Dani stares back, his eyes on Marc's. _I still feel so much for you._ The parts of his heart that haven't been broken already are shattering in pieces right here, while he looks in the younger man's face and sees the pain. He wipes away the residue of his tears with the sleeve of his hoodie, he swallows down the lump in his throat, all the while eyes locked with Marc's, who is biting down on his lower lip. Marc, the man he still somehow thinks of as the love of his life, who changed everything he knew about himself and the world, who taught him more lessons than he expected to learn from a so much younger man. Marc, who looks, despite the agony that is clearly written over his face and despite Dani's furor, still gorgeous, slightly lost in his black hoodie and the tight jeans, hair ruffled, cheeks and eyes red, but overall, simply beautiful.

Later, after staring back and forth long enough, it's Dani who closes the distance between them, walking up right in front of Marc, close enough for their faces to touch and the taller rider tilts his head down, their foreheads leaning against each other now. Marc closes his eyes, focusing entirely on the feeling of Dani's breath on his skin, scorching him and concentrating on the feeling of Dani's heartbeat against his chest. The smaller rider's arm tentatively wraps around Marc's waist and Marc feels like he is suffocating under the light touch, the knowledge that the gentle moment will end so soon and with so much finality tearing him apart.

Dani feels Marc's soft skin against his and drowns in the familiar smell, mingled with alcohol this morning. _God, I love you so much. And I hate you for making me feel this way._ Marc's heart is racing, he can feel it against his ribs. In an attempt, to calm the younger man, he slides his hand under the hoodie, his fingers on the hot and smooth skin of Marc's back now, his fingers drawing lines over Marc's spine. _Fuck. That's not where this was supposed to be going._ Clumsily and more automatically than with actual determination, his lips search for Marc's, pressing against the other man's mouth softly. 

_Okay. You started this. So I think I get to play along._ Marc feels the touch of Dani's mouth and closes his eyes while he parts his lips, tongue gently reaching out, asking for a permission to enter that is easily granted, Dani's mouth opening without hesitation. On his back, he feels gentle fingers brushing over his bones, the softness of the touch sending thousands of little electric signals down his spine. His own hands slide under Dani's hoodie now, resting on Dani's sides in the knowledge that the other has a soft spot there and when Marc's fingers teasingly brush over the delicate skin, he can feel Dani shudder under his touch.

Dani is desperate, torn between giving in to Marc, surrendering once again and turning on his heels to leave. His body and his brain cannot agree on a common take on the situation, his brain shouting at him to go and his body melting against Marc's. A small moan falls from his lips, into their gentle kiss when Marc's hands slide into the back of his jeans and straight under his boxers. _This is not going to end well._ He leans forward and starts walking, carefully shoving Marc towards the bed and it's definitely not a decision that his head has made when he pushes Marc down into the mattress, their lips still locked and Marc's eyes scrutinizing his with a confused expression. 

Letting out a surprised hum, Marc’s head falls into the pillow, Dani’s mouth still attached to his, their tongues tentatively playing hide and seek with each other. With Dani’s weight on him and Dani’s small but toned body rubbing against his, he is feeling desperate for more, craving for touch and friction. His fingers dig into the flesh of Dani’s hips violently, clawing to the bones and holding the other down firmly, pressing their laps against each other and with a determined move, he rolls them over, pinning Dani down under him now and searching Dani’s face for a reaction.

The smaller rider is trying to regain control over his body, failing miserably at the task and helplessly reveling in Marc’s touch and caresses. The taller rider is holding him down, lips devouring his mouth, hips bucking against his and Dani cannot help himself, his head falling back into the pillow, eyes rolling and legs parting willingly for Marc to lie between. When Marc breaks their kiss, lifting his head up, Dani’s lips stay open and he is panting, his eyes searching Marc’s face for hint of why he pulled away.

Propped up over the other rider, like he has been so many times by now, Marc studies Dani’s expression, the temptation of the swollen lips, coated with saliva almost overwhelming him, but he holds back, his brain suddenly taking over and his eyes finding Dani’s, analyzing the other’s emotional state. _You will still leave. Once we are done, you will take your bags and leave._ The realization hits Marc hard, twisting his guts violently. He takes in the sight underneath one last time, briefly awing the disheveled man whom he still loves more than himself and then he determinedly swallows down the lump in his throat and jumps from the bed.  
“This is a bad idea,” Marc says with a soft and trembling voice, his back towards Dani and his eyes filling with tears again. 

Dani stays on the bed for an instant, regaining composure. He catches his breath, wipes his mouth and runs his hands through his hair. _And even now you have to beat me in maturity, don’t you?_ His eyes rest on Marc’s back, overwhelmed with affection and fondness one more time. Then, his heart stops beating and his blood freezes when he sees Marc take off the ring, putting it down on the nightstand without looking at him, before the younger man turns around again, arms and face against the wall.

Marc thinks that this is what a heart attack must feel like, his chest burning, his heart racing and the sound of his blood rushing through his head unbearably loud. Behind his back, he hears Dani shuffle and move, the sounds of a jacket closing and bags being collected. After a felt eternity, the door is slammed shut and Marc wouldn’t have been surprised if he had died in that moment, the sound striking him like a bullet.

_Mach die Augen zu und küss mich_  
 _Ist es auch das letzte Mal_  
 _Lass uns den Moment des Abschieds noch verzögern_  
 _Lass mich jetzt noch nicht allein mit meiner Qual_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Close your eyes and kiss me  
> even if this is for the last time  
> Let's delay the moment of departure  
> Don't leave me yet with this agony of mine


	65. Don't Let Me Fall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo, a break from the heartbreak!  
> ♥  
> Only an interruption, but still, I needed it, they needed it and I suppose, some of you did, too ;)

_Underneath the moon_   
_Underneath the stars_   
_Here's a little heart for you_

**Thursday, 9 pm, A Restaurant in Valencia**  
"Hey, you made it, nice!"  
Jorge hugs the other man, still in disbelief about the situation. _I'm having dinner with Valentino Rossi and his boyfriend. Who would have thought?_ Grinning to himself, he reaches over to welcom Nicky, who'd just released Clara from a tight hug that actually made his girl blush and it looks adorable on her.  
"Hey, mate, you're okay?" Nicky pats his shoulder, smiling broadly. Nicky's good mood, his easy going attitude that's something he's always admired. It's a lightness that's missing from his life. Or has been missing until he met Clara at least. Maybe that jealousy, that desire to have more pure fun was one of the main reasons that kept him apart from Vale for so long. Now, he has Clara though and it feels as if with her, he has at least found a bit of their mentality. He marvels her while she gets pulled into another hug from Vale, the lanky Italian pressing a kiss on each of her cheeks which are turning even more beautifully pink under his lips. She giggles, she flirts, her dark blonde curls swinging around her head seductively and the blue eyes sparkling. _God, I'm so glad I found you._

They order their food and chatter along, everybody carefully avoiding the name Marquez. The press conference had filled everybody's need of awkwardness, Marc blatantly ignoring any questions regarding Dani and then running out had not exactly made matters any easier. They had kind of tried to cover for it, tried to explain he was just too confused and upset about Dani's health, but to be honest, they didn't believe themselves and neither did the press. And it's not like Dani's absence hadn't been noted. The situation with Dani and Marc has grown over his head, his loyalty to Dani seriously challenged by the smaller rider's behaviour. If it wasn't for Nicky's matter-of-factly approach to life and problem solving, one step at a time, he wouldn't know how to make it through this. Valentino sighs and tunes back in to the conversations around him. His eyes rest on Nicky's face, Nicky, who had decided that they needed this dinner, that they needed air and space and a breath. _You're the most beautiful person I've ever met, inside out._ He sees the sparkles in Nicky's eyes when he tells Clara stories from his US family. Vale has heard most of them, but for Clara and Jorge they're new and they're admittedly funny so that the young girl and even the usually grumpy Spanish rider are laughing freely, Clara already wiping tears from her eyes. 

They've made it to coffee when the table suddenly gets quiet and somewhat tense. Nicky knows that it is in everybody's head, that they won't get through the evening without mentioning it, but he's still dreading it. Yet, he clears his throat and then decides to approach things slowly, looking at Clara when he speaks, "So, have you heard from Marta?"  
Clara swallows, he can see the movement of her throat, but then replies with a steady voice, "Yes. The baby is doing really well." Nicky nods and smiles reassuringly and he notices how Jorge takes the girl's hand, clasping it tightly with his own. _Sweet._ Under the table, he nudges Vale's knee and gets a squeeze in return.  
"Any news from her and Alex?"  
Clara shakes her head, golden curls jumping with the movement. "They're not talking. Dani called her though, last night."  
"Did he?" Nicky sees Vale's eyebrow jerk up and he frowns. _Aw. You're jealous? He'd been to the bar with you already though!_ He laces his fingers with the Italian's and smiles at Vale's possessiveness towards the small Spanish rider. When they first started dating, Nicky had admittedly been jealous of Dani Pedrosa and his close ties with Vale. Over the years - and wow, they've really been dating for years by now - the feeling wore off, though he never understood why Vale wouldn't tell Dani about them.  
"Yes, he called her in the middle of the night and whined about Marc cheating with Jorge." Clara blushes and stares at her espresso. "I told her that was ridiculous and she said she figured, but felt that Dani really believed that." Nicky looks over to Jorge, finding him cringing.  
"It is ridiculous though," the Spanish rider presses out behind gritted teeth. _Well, rationality and love don't go well together, I suppose._ Nicky's head drops to Vale's shoulder while the Italian calls for the bill. 

_Take a little time_   
_Walk a little line_   
_Got the balance right aha_

It's a cool autumn night and Clara shivers under Jorge's jacket when they're gathered outside, waiting for a taxi. It's Vale who holds out a pack of cigarettes, offering her on first and she accepts with a small nod, allowing him to light it for her, amused by the glint of jealous flashing up in Jorge's eyes. _Oh Jorge, he's so gay... why would you worry?_ She leans against her boyfriend's side though, a reassuring gesture and she smiles at the possessive arm that drapes around her waist immediately, while Jorge takes a cigarette with his free hand. If anyone had told her that those athletic MotoGP guys smoke so much, she wouldn't have believed it and she's still surprised how rarely it's caught on camera. _You're all cheeky much._ With a smile on her lips she watches Vale and Nicky, cuddled up against each other like her and Jorge, Nicky in Vale's jacket. _So, so adorable._ And she remembers that she'd always thought the same about Dani and Marc and sighs.   
"So, Dani definitely left?" She asks tentatively and she's not sure she even wants to hear the answer.   
"Yes, looks like it," Vale croaks. "He sent me a message that he's heading for Geneva."  
"Are we doing anything?" It's not like she doesn't realize how pathetic she sounds, but not doing anything feels cruel.  
"Let's get the weekend done with first. We have a season to finish and so do Marc and Alex. Then we can talk to Julia."  
They finish their cigarettes in silence, each of them focusing on the thin lines of smoke that are lingering in the crisp autumn air. Clara watches Jorge drag, the smooth movement of his hand, the way his lips close around the cigarettes and she feels a sting through her guts. _Marta is right. It looks damned hot. I just wish it wouldn't taste so horrible._

_Give a little love_   
_Gimme just enough_   
_So that i can hang on tight_

**Friday, 12 am, Room 1069**  
Vale leans back against the headboard, arms behind his head and watches Nicky undress, eyes devouring the tanned skin and the dancing muscles. Nicky looks up at him with a broad grin, obviously having noticed his interest. And Vale grins back, knowing that denial would be futile with the proof visible in his lap.   
“That was a nice distraction,” Vale whispers in his ear when the American crawls over him now, their foreheads against each other. “But I have an idea for an even better entertainment.”  
“Oh, do you?” Nicky answers with a cheeky grin and a low, seductive voice.  
Instead of an answer, Vale growls and presses his mouth against Nicky’s violently, their teeth gritting and his nails roughly digging in the American’s shoulder blades. He hears his boyfriend moan into the kiss and in his lap he can feel that Nicky is interested in the offer. Passionately as usual, he bites down on Nicky’s lip, the American wincing briefly and he feels Nicky’s nails scraping on the skin of his back. After a while of rough and wet kissing, they break apart, panting heavily and Vale’s eyes beam at the sight of Nicky’s swollen lips. With a sudden movement, he feels his hands pinned against the wall and Nicky is staring at him, eyes clouded with desire and the look so intense, the ruffled hair and flushed face so gorgeous, that Vale’s hips are bucking up involuntarily.   
“Eager.” Nicky grins cheekily. “Want to ride?”  
Vale nods, hypnotized by Nicky’s lips and the words sending a hot bolt of lightning down his guts.

_We will be alright_   
_I'll be by your side_   
_I won't let you down_

**Friday, 1 am, Room 1099**  
They’re splayed out on their backs, gasping for air desperately, bodies coated with a sheen of sweat and hands laced between them. It takes Jorge a moment before his mind slowly returns from the afterglow into the real world. When he’s mostly back, he rolls to his side, head propped up on his elbow and a gentle finger drawing lines on Clara’s stomach.   
“You’re beautiful,” he whispers, pressing a kiss against her temple.  
“So are you,” she tilts her head, giving him her broadest smile, the one where her eyes shine like those of a kid that has its birthday. He feels her fingers run through his hair and melts into the touch.   
“I love you,” he says breathlessly and he means it. Suddenly he knows that he really, really with all the implications that this has, means it. _I love you._ He repeats the words in his head, smiling incredulously and she smiles even brighter now and presses a peck to his forehead.   
“I love you, too. But you’ll get more kisses if you stop smoking.” He feels another peck, this time against his chin.  
“As if you’re any better,” he says with a laugh and starts tickling her side. She releases that adorable, high pitched giggling that he’s become so familiar with and squirms under his hand. With a determination that surprises him, she suddenly sits up to straddle him, pinning his wrists into the mattress and looking down at him with a serious expression.  
“You know, Mister Lorenzo, I really, really love you and one day, in the far future, I will want you to put a ring here,” she holds one of her hands up, the ring finger right before his eyes, “and then I want you to put a baby right here,” she takes his hand now and puts it against her flat stomach, “and until then, you will have to get rid of that nasty habit of yours.”  
With any other woman – or man – in his life, the words would have made him scream and run. With Clara saying them, it’s different and all he does is grab her head and pull her down for a kiss. _Oh yes, I will do that and it will be my pleasure, young lady._

_You're just the one that i've been waiting for_

**Friday, 6 am, Room 1069**  
Nicky wakes up first, rays of early morning sun lighting the room just enough to watch the man next to him. Vale’s face looks younger, so much younger when he sleeps. Over the years, Nicky learned how much hidden fear and tension the Italian hides behind the always-smiling façade. He admires the spirit and aims for it himself, but sometimes he worries that the real Vale has gotten a little lost on the way to the top. He cannot really imagine how it is to grow up as such a genius and he wonders if that’s why it sometimes seems that theirs is a kind of easy bond between Vale and Marc. The two of them aren’t really friends, or weren’t until recently, but they’d always seemed so much alike on the podium and in press conferences. _They stole your youth and they’re stealing Marc’s._ He runs a hand through Vale’s curls, moving a stray strand of hair out of the Italian’s face. _But you turned out lovely anyway and so will Marc._ Pressing a kiss to Vale’s temple, Nicky disentangles from the sheets, heading towards a shower with a yawn. _I hope we’ll agree on a common wake up time one day. I’d like to add showering together to our life._

_I'll give you all that i have to give and more_

**Friday, 7 am, Room 1099**  
Clara sits up on the bed, eyes marvelling Jorge’s toned body. _I can’t believe I said that last night._ She feels her cheeks heat up at the memory. _But I can even less believe that you didn’t jump. You played along. And that’s incredible._ Beaming, she starts tickling Jorge’s chest, her eyes resting on his face and watching him wake up with a frown on his face that makes her chuckle.  
“Hey, sleepyhead, you have some riding to do.”  
Jorge clears his throat and gives her a cheeky grin, “I’d rather have you do the riding.”  
Clara feels not only her cheeks but her entire body blush at the words and chuckles briefly. “Maybe if you do well in practice we can discuss that tonight.”  
She squeals when Jorge wrestles her down in the mattress, devouring her properly within an instant. _I cannot believe we’re doing this during race weekends now. Damned, we’re official now. What a crazy season._

_Up above the world_   
_Up above it all_   
_Here's a hand to hold on to_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song by the wonderful, amazing Lenka ♥


	66. Fade To Black

_Life, it seems, will fade away_   
_Drifting further every day_

**Friday, 6 pm, Cervera**  
Marta packs. She knows that she doesn't have to leave, but she also knows that she cannot stay. Having sworn Clara into secrecy, she's getting ready to head for Clara's apartment in Milano. Roser has made a number of attempts to make her stay and she has been tempted over and over to do just that, because it would be so easy, because the Marquez' are a wonderful family, because the insecurity of what she will do about her and the baby in Italy is overwhelming her with fear. Nevertheless, staying here would mean giving in. It would always feel like surrendering, like defeat, as if she wasn't worth honesty, not even for herself. She has, if at least she is honest with herself now for once, become sick of the dependence, in every aspect of her life. For the past months, she has - as much as Alex's parents tried to brush her concerns away - always been a burden, a victim and weak. And after all of the things Alex said and after what he apparently did, she's had it, finally. Alex might not be aware yet, but he kindly butt-dialled her during that inglorious night, even after Dani had called her to break the horror story of him and Marc to her. And through the line, beside a lot of rustling, she'd heard Alex's voice, clear enough to understand that he was begging for more and the audible moans indicated clearly that he wasn't asking for ice cream there. The lid of her suitcase is smashed with determination and then she leaves, hugging Roser, who is shedding a tear, on her way out, a friend from Barcelona picking her up to take her to the airport. And no, she isn't allowed to fly anymore but unless anyone at the terminal asks her, there's no way she's telling them how far along she truly is. _And I DARE you to ask me._ When the taxi pulls out of the driver, her eyes fly back to _the_ house one more time, Roser waving goodbye, the door far open and the memories are crushing her. They had good times - no, great times - there. Everybody had done such an amazing job at integrating her, making her feel loved, accepted and sheltered. She'd had so much fun, Alex had been the sweetest boyfriend and fiancé she could have wished for, his parents had been gorgeous. And she remembers Marc and Alex chasing each other around the yard, playing and wrestling and tears flow freely down her cheeks when she realizes just how much time has passed since then.

_Growing darkness taking dawn_   
_I was me, but now he's gone_

**Friday, 7 pm, Valencia**  
Marc is drowning his sorrows. He knows that it's a race weekend and that he has a qualifying tomorrow, but who is he kidding? He's done his job, gotten them the trophy and now the rest simply doesn't matter. He chucks his drink, cringing at the burn in his throat and gestures the bartender to hand him another one. The barman is experienced enough not to bat an eyelid at the request and Marc sighs into the clear liquid, contemplating on the little patterns the fluid makes when the glass moves. He hasn't done anything wrong that night. If he tells himself often enough, he must end up believing it at one point, right? Truth to be told, he messed up worse than ever before in his life. _I had everything. Just everything I ever wanted. Where did that go wrong?_ It must have gone wrong when Dani, instead of discussing it with him, instead of leaning on him, instead of reaching out to him, called Alberto and sacrificed his career without as much as a word to Marc. _He let me hear it from the team. Fuck._ No, he doesn't understand why Dani did it that way, though part of him has by now acknowledged that it probably has nothing to do with them or Dani's feelings for him and he wishes he could kick himself for ever thinking that. It just hurt so bad, Dani being so distant, Dani doing things behind his back. _God, that hurt so bad._ Chucking another drink, ordering a new one, thoughts on a rollercoaster ride through their relationship, worrying where Dani is right now, what he is doing, if he even misses him. And all of that during a race weekend. Still, he's a second time world champion and even if he doesn't do well, they'll still keep him around, because nobody would ever trade him in. And that's the moment, where the understanding flashes him from head to toe and he wants to scream and break down and run when he realizes that it's two days or possibly two weeks too late. With his pulse racing, his cheeks flushed and his body shaking, he sinks leans on the bar, trying to calm his breath. Absentmindedly, his fingers trail over the part of his ring finger that feels so naked and vulnerable since yesterday and finally, heavy fatigue falling down on him, his head drops to his arms, tears falling on the bar now.

_Getting lost within myself_   
_Nothing matters, no one else_

**Friday, 8 pm, Madrid-Barajas**  
Dani hides behind sunglasses. He doesn't care that it's late, doesn't care that he's inside and he's not wearing them to go incognito. All he wants is to hide the redness and the dark circles that so clearly give away that he's suffering. Inside his head, he is still trying to convince himself that it is going to be okay, that he hasn't fucked up royally, that he can still somehow fix things and then he feels the ring in the back pocket of his jeans and he knows that his chances of fixing _this_ are about as high as Doctor Mir's chances of fixing his arm. For the hundredths time he reaches for his phone and checks it, praying that Marc finally came back, running after him, pleading with him. _He hasn't said a word. He never even asked me to stay. He just stood there and let me leave._ With his heart thundering in his chest and his fingers shaking, he slides away the screen lock - only to find no new messages. Not one. And although he's repeated the procedure countless times over the course of the day, it shatters his heart into pieces once again, his breath hitching and his body breaking out in cold sweat. If his stomach keeps flipping like this, he'll end up throwing up during the flight. At least, that won't look too suspicious though. After all, there's many people who get sick from flying, right?

_No one but me can save myself, but it's too late_   
_Now I can't think, think why I should even try_

**Friday, 9 pm, Valencia**  
Alex falls back into the mattress, pulling Alvaro with him. Only a few hours ago, guilt had been everywhere, weighing him down, making him hopeless and helpless and then he'd received his mother's text. _She left._ And he snapped, left for the bar, downed too many drinks, found Alvaro, again, fell for Alvaro's blue eyes, again, dragged him upstairs, again. And now they're here, together, again. As soon as they had stumbled inside the room, their clothes had been shed to the floor in a hurry and their lips had locked. In fact, they're still locked, their sticky bodies flush against each other on the bed now, both of them moaning helplessly into their kiss. It's when their hands start exploring greedily, hungrily, that he suddenly feels Alvaro still in his movements and Alex slowly blinks his eyes open, Alvaro sitting back on his heels now, giving him a wry smile.   
"What are we even doing here, Bambi?"  
Alex chokes. The haze of the alcohol is wiped away, arousal vanished into thin air and he feels nauseous, lost and utterly stupid. And instead of doing anything remotely reasonable, he hears himself croak, "Bambi?"  
"Yeah, sorry. A lot of people call you that... I think it's the innocence and the eyes. Well, now maybe just the eyes." Alvaro smiles and doesn't sound aggressive at all, but the remark still breaks Alex.   
He ends up in the older man's lap, curled up, sobbing and feeling incredibly sick, praying and hoping that he'll wake up and find that everything is still okay. Instead, he almost falls asleep on Alvaro and after a while, his head jerks up to concerned blue eyes, scrutinizing him.   
"You're better?"  
Alex shakes his head. _I don't think it will ever get better. This is beyond repair._


	67. Crying In The Rain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're getting there ... ;)
> 
> Thank you for the overwhelming feedback! 
> 
> ♥

With Marta gone, Roser has no reason to stay in Cervera. She arrives in Valencia just in time to see Marc win pole and while she knows she should be proud, she is also horrified at the cold blood he is showing. Dani had meant something to him, they had known it from the moment the two had had arrived at their house together. The way they talked to each other, the way they laughed with each other, the way their eyes communicated effortlessly. When she confronts him in the hotel, later that night, she only receives a glare and a hiss. "Why do you even care? You were against the engagement right from the start so I guess you're quite satisfied with this?" And he held his finger in front of her eyes before he stomped out on her and of course she noticed that the ring was missing. And if they hadn't anticipated before, they knew that it was bad now.   
Then, there's also Alex, a whole other story, though no less heartbreaking for a mother. It's difficult to believe that her baby, her sweet, always sensible and quiet baby has done all the things she's heard of and probably more. And she would want to deny it, but a lot of it she witnessed and overheard back in Cervera. Just like his brother, he gets the pole position easily and just like his brother, his face remains frozen and cold. No comments for journalist, no smiles, sun glasses down at all times, even with the cloudy skies. When she tries to talk to him at night, his eyes evade hers but she can still see the pain and the regret. _So your normal self is still somewhere in there, right? The loyal little boy is still hiding there? I hope he finds his way back out soon._   
It's late at night, she's too wound up to sleep, standing in front of the window and looking into the dark sky. Rain splashes against the glass and she cannot help the thought that the weather is really prepared for the occasion. She turns her head when the shuffling of feet approaches, finding Julia coming towards her, standing next to her, arm around her waist. With a sigh, her head falls to his shoulder and she melts into his embrace. "You know," he whispers, pressing a kiss to her hair, "I've told Marc before, I've told Marta and I will tell you: It will be alright. In the end, everything will be alright." It's one of the few moments in her marriage where she prays that he's right and she's wrong.

Marc is standing on his balcony, the splashing rain hitting him even though he is under the roof. Cigarette in one hand, bottle of wine in the other, he watches the black sky and wonders if the weather is any kind of reference to his life, while the tears on his cheeks mix with the cold droplets from the rain.

Alex leans against his room's window, forehead against the cold glass. His eyes squeezed shut; he feels the rain heavily splattering against it. He is, once again, splendidly drunk and he's cried himself into exhaustion. Seeing his mother, the unhidden disappointment in her eyes, had taken away the last bit of self-respect he had left. And she is right, so right. Because Alex KNOWS it was a stupid argument to begin with, knows he's been wrong all along. Of course it's his son. Of course Marta didn't cheat on him. He just feels so incredibly, infuriatingly jealous when it comes to Javier - and know he's broken everything.

In Switzerland, Dani watches the drizzles of rain from his balcony, the night bringing back up memories from a very similar, though much warmer, night from months ago. Back then, he thought he couldn't love a man. Now he knows better and still hasn't gained a thing. Instead, he has thrown away everything with one stupid and defiant phone call. He's crying in silence and to his own surprise, the end of his career is not the reason at all.

Nicky is drenched. The brief way to the taxi has been enough to soak him completely and if he is also tired and in quite a bit of pain from his accident in qualifying. _So I'm missing yet another race. What a surprise._ It's a season to forget in that way, but he hopes he can make it a season to remember in another.

Clara is shivering in her wet coat and dress and she is sure that she looks horrible, but that's the least of her concerns right now. She'd never expected Jorge to be half as caring as he is now and she won't deny that she sometimes felt jealous towards Marc. On the whole though, she's never seen him as competition, without meaning that as degrading. There's just something in the way Jorge and Marc behave that so obviously gives away the status between them, that tells plain and open that they respect each other - nothing more. And she cannot really believe that Dani didn't see that.

In a dark and hidden corner behind the hotel, soaked from the rain, shivering and obligatory cigarettes in hand, Jorge and Valentino are discussing animatedly. And although they don't know it, don't mention it to each other, the same thought occurs to them: _How could it have taken so much for us to finally be working for the same cause?_

_You'll never know that I still love you so_  
 _Though the heartaches remain_  
 _I'll do my crying in the rain_


	68. In These Arms

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost ♥  
> And because I really couldn't do this the way I wanted to, I made you another mystery ;)  
> Again, I won't leave spoilers in the comments but feel free to stalk on tumblr (stripedsquirrel) or livejournal :)

_I would give anything_  
 _My blood, my love, my life_  
 _If you were in these arms tonight_

**Sunday, 7 am, Room 1099**  
“Will you make it on time?”  
“I HAVE NO IDEA. I JUST TOLD YOU.”  
“Stop yelling, please. It’s not my fault.”  
“IT’S NOT MINE EITHER.”  
“Yeah, but I’m sure we’ll be rewarded with something. There must be karma.”  
“YOU’RE NOT SERIOUSLY TRYING TO TELL ME ANYTHING ABOUT KARMA RIGHT NOW?”  
“Aw, don’t be mad. Just trying to cheer you up. I’ll better hang up now.”  
“Yeah, you better.”  
“Okay.”  
“Honey?”  
“Yes?”  
“Be careful.”  
“I will. Always. And same to you guys.”

 **Sunday, 7 am, Room 1069**  
“Hey, are you going to make it?”  
“Don’t worry, we’ll be there.”  
“Good. I’m nervous.”  
“About this or the race?”  
“Both. But maybe a bit more about this.”  
“Aw. You’re incredible. I never knew you cared so much.”  
“Hey, I have a very soft spot for things like that.”  
“I know, I know. Listen, I gotta hang up now, battery is dying.”  
“Okay, watch out, for both of you, okay?”  
“I will. But you take care, too. Be smarter than me, okay?”

 **Sunday, afternoon, Honda garage** Roser feels covered in cold sweat and fears she'll have a heart attack, she's biting her nails and pacing in the pit. At times, she stands next to Julia, her fingers digging into his forearm, nails scraping deep enough to draw some blood. Seventeen years of racing and seeing her kids on track has not become any easier. Next to her Julia screams and gestures and they go through the ordeal twice. Forgotten are all worries, it's only her watching her boys, filled with pride. Ultimately, bursting with joy. Because at the end of the day, they both stayed strong, they both made it, fulfilled their dreams, reached their and she is now mother of two world champions, an incredible feeling. Twice, when the chequered flag is waved, one of her son’s wins. And twice she is filled with so much happiness. It’s only when they take off their helmets and the cameras take close ups of their faces, that her blood freezes and her mood drops below zero. For both of them, Marc and Alex, there is that brief instant, helmet just off, where they haven’t covered their expressions yet, where they have not established their “easy-going-everything-is-fine”-smiles yet. Maybe it’s something that only a mother sees, but there’s a split-second where they look completely devastated and broken.

 **Sunday, 5 pm, paddock**  
"Alex?"  
"Hey. I didn’t know we’re speaking again.”  
“Don’t be a dick. And we can talk about that later. It’s important.”  
“Important? What do you want?"  
"Well, I think I should tell you something. I got a text this morning."  
"What is it?"  
"Marta knows."  
"Knows what?"  
"About you - and Alvaro."  
"Seriously?"  
"Yes. And before you even ask, nobody told her. You accidentally called her, while-"  
"Fuck."  
"Yes... that."

 **Sunday, 6.30 pm, taxi 1**  
"So, are we all set?"  
"Yes, all arranged."  
"Sure?"  
"I brought him. Yes."  
"He'll do it?"  
"Yes."  
"Thanks, sweetheart."  
"You owe me. They owe me."  
"Don't worry, I will pay my debt." 

**Sunday, 6.30 pm, taxi 2**  
"Oh, you're here. God. I'm so glad you made it on time."  
"So am I. It was a trip to hell and back. But yeah, we made it. Can I have a cigarette?"  
"Sure. So, everything ready?"  
"Yeah, I think so. But I've arranged it for the after party."  
"Unless they were as successful as you, there might not be much of a party."  
"Well, luckily, they were. And the moment tonight will be only for _them_. So I arranged our little surprise for the after party. And I promise that there will be one."  
"I have no doubt in you. Never did."  
"I know. But I sure as hell never gave you a reason, so I guess it's deserved." 

**Sunday evening, Valencia**  
For a soon-to-be-crowned world champion, Marc has a rather devastated mood. He is sitting backstage, in his suit that always feels just that little bit too stiff, too formal and in which he never quite feels like himself. All during this weekend, he has tried to play pretence. At times, it worked better, at other times, it didn't. Mostly it did though and so far, the media mostly writes about his success and Dani's retirement but not their actual breakup. At least, not yet. His fingers rub over the spot where the ring should be, that spot on his ring finger that has felt so naked for the past days. He swallows, he coughs, he blinks. With all his focus and determination, biting his lower lip relentlessly, he suppresses the tears. And in his head, he makes a silent offer, he prays, he begs, he bargains, ready to give everything, title, talent, life, health, if he could have Dani back, back where he belongs. In his arms.

 **Sunday evening, Valencia**  
He is waiting behind the stage, dressed up. He's checked himself countless times, more and more unhappy with the way he looks in that suit, ruffling his hair and earning a glare from the make-up artist. For the hundredth time, he checks his watch, coughs and clears his throat. His heart is beating its way out of his chest right now; that much he is sure of. On top of it, his fingers are so shaky, he is sure he'll drop it. Then, he will stumble, because his legs are trembling. Probably, he will also be unable to say a single thing, as he apparently has forgotten how to form words, his mind too far gone into vicious circles of horrifying thoughts that create the worst possible outcomes for tonight and replay them over and over again.

**Sunday evening, Valencia**

Clara has whispered with Julia and Roser agitatedly and is now watching the stage, beaming at Jorge and his trophy, smirking at Vale who is giving her them a telling wink and a brief thumbs up and she waits, anxiously and with sweaty hands.

Roser and Julia clasp their hands, both squeezing hard enough to break the other’s fingers and both gulping slightly. They cannot believe what these kids have done, they really cannot. But they both readily admit that from all the stories they’ve been told, the young people are well capable of it. And Julia smiles knowingly when he sees Roser’s eyes fill with tears again, beaming at the stage.

Behind the stage, eyes glued to a monitor, Vale’s hand slides into Nicky’s and he feels Jorge’s hand on his shoulder, squeezing tightly. “Ready?” He whispers.  
“Not up to us,” Nicky presses a peck to his cheek.  
Their eyes stay on the screen, watching things unfold and they are holding their breaths, their hearts stop beating and Jorge’s grip in Vale’s shoulder is hard enough to leave marks.  
And when _he_ walks out, the three of them simultaneously hiss, “Go for it.”

_I'd tell you that I'd never leave you_  
 _And love you 'til the end of time_  
 _If you were in these arms... tonight_


	69. Anyway That You Want Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nicky-Chapter ♥ ♥ ♥
> 
> Thank you all for EVERYTHING ♥
> 
> (No fish tonight though, this has been longer than I thought, sorry :/ ;) )

_If it's love that you want_  
 _Baby, you've got it_  
 _From the depth of my soul_  
 _Baby, you've got it_

There is no way to describe Marc's feelings during that moment, there simply are no words. He has walked on that stage, knowing that he owes the celebration to his friends and his team and willing himself to look halfway happy, despite the feeling that his heart was torn apart from the pain of not sharing the moment with the love of his life. And he stands there, his eyes flickering around nervously, smiling tentatively, when the person who brings his trophy is announced. He isn't listening to the voice of the hosts, his mind too far into his heartache and in the beginning, he isn't even looking, because his eyes are wandering through the audience. But then, his mind slow on the intake, but processing it in the end, he notices that the room is, for an instant, completely silent, before a murmuring and whispering commences. That's what makes him curious and he slightly turns his head towards the new arrival - freezing mid movement, jar dropped, eyes wide, lips parted. _You. Oh my God. You. Want you. Need you. Now. Please._ Tears dwell up immediately, his heart isn't even beating anymore and he has lost all abilities to talk or think coherently, eyes fixed on the man approaching him, coming closer and closer. His body and mind burn, crave, long for _him_ with unknown force and ferocity and Marc bites down on his lip violently to suppress a scream. And _he_ is coming closer and Marc studies the familiar face, loses himself in the mocha coloured eyes, drinks in the tentative smile and feels all his muscles shaking from the urge of throwing himself all over the other man. All over Dani.

Never could Dani put into words how he felt when he walked up that stage. The nervousness before a race is nothing against this moment, against the cold sweat, the thundering heart, the shaky legs and the completely blank mind when he stumbles forward, his arm weighed down by the trophy Marc more than gloriously earned, winning all but one race in the season. _And that one is my fault after all._ There's pure shock written over the younger rider's face, Dani notices and as much as he tries to scrutinize him, Dani cannot tell whether it is a positive or a negative shock. Putting one foot in front of the other, willing himself not to run away, to face this, he makes his way. The closer he gets, the stronger the desire floods his veins, the more pain spreads through his body, the more he wants, needs and craves being close to Marc. There are tears on his cheeks and he doesn't care, doesn't even try to suppress it. _Physical pain. Your absence caused my physical pain._ Torn between hope and fear, he closes the last bit of distance between them, his eyes on Marc's, trying to read the younger rider desperately. He tries for a tentative, awkward smile and waits for a reaction, sees Marc's lip twitch slightly. 

The murmuring dissolves into cheers and applause, whistling and yelling, the audience jumping from their seats. His nails digging sharply into the flesh of Vale's forearm, Nicky watches the two riders, standing across from each other at arm's length and staring back and forth. Along with the two other men, he is holding his breath, waiting for the next thing to happen. To him, it looks as if it is happening in slow motion, their mouths breaking into broad smiles, their eyes lighting up, Dani's arm reaching around Marc, trophy in hand, pulling the younger man in. He sees them fall into that embrace and he sighs with relief, Jorge and Vale doing the same and he also feels Vale's arm around his shoulder, holding him that bit closer, Vale's lips pressing a brief kiss against his temple, sending shivers down his spine. In his head, the images of that horrendous night run havoc, the rain, the taxis, the airports, the flights, knocking against Dani's door, finding the small rider properly wasted and in a complete mess and basically, dragging him along. All that with the pain of his accident all over his body. They made it though and the way the two men are incredulously looking at each other, still in that same hug, makes it all worth every second of it. That and the silent whisper with thick Italian accent, that reaches his ear now. "You made that possible." Vale's tongue flicks over his ear, another shiver running down the American's spine. "And I promise I will pay my debt tonight."

Marc shudders under Dani’s touch and he has no idea how long they’ve been standing there already, but he knows they have to break apart now, continue the ceremony and he slowly pulls back, not without a whisper to Dani’s ear. “We have to talk.”  
“I know,” Dani whispers back, hot breath scorching Marc’s skin. “Later.”

_Anyway that you want me_

It’s Marc’s party and he has made a brief effort to celebrate with everyone, but Dani is here. DANI. And he just cannot stand it, the awkwardness of them standing next to each other, of not knowing whether or not he is allowed to take Dani’s hand, feeling torn between yelling at the smaller rider and cuddling him to death. With all they’ve been through this season, he just genuinely hopes and prays the team will understand and, giving Emilio a brief signal, receiving a reassuring nod in return, he goes all in and takes Dani’s hand, pulling on him to make him follow him outside. And it works. Slightly shocked, Marc realizes that Dani doesn’t pull away. Instead, the older man follows him without batting an eyelid. Wordlessly, they go outside, sitting down with their backs against the brick walls, shoulders and legs almost touching and hands still clasped. 

The silence that surrounds them feels tense, sounds of them gulping omnipresent. When Dani pulls his hand away, Marc’s heart drops, a bit relieved though when he notices him fidgeting with cigarettes and a lighter, for the first time realizing how well the small rider has adjusted to doing all of it with one hand. He gladly accepts, when he is offered a cigarette as well and after the first desperate drags, he finally finds the courage to clear his throat and raise his voice.  
“You came.” _But does this mean you came back?_ The unspoken question weighs heavy on Marc’s heart. Gathering his strength, he turns his head slightly, still studying Dani’s face in the mix of moonlight and dim light from a nearby streetlamp.  
“I did.” Dani’s voice is hoarse and shaky and Marc squints, thinking there might be traces of tears on the other man’s cheeks. _There certainly are some on mine._ Dani won’t look at him, keeping his gaze on the floor, but after another a moment of tense silence, he starts speaking again. “I -… I shouldn’t have left I think. But I don’t understand, Marc, I really don’t.” “What don’t you understand?” Marc gulps, feeling the anger return despite wanting to keep it away.  
“Why Jorge?” That broken voice, that sad and broken voice crushes Marc’s heart.  
“You still think I cheated?” He wills himself to stay calm, fists clenching in his own jeans.  
“No. But why did you leave me alone? Why his room and not Alex’s or Vale’s?”  
Absentmindedly, Marc traces a line on Dani’s arm, not even noticing that he’s actually, in this very moment, finally given in, understood that he made a mistake as well. And with deep a sigh, he explains, “Alex and I weren’t speaking. Vale is your friend. And Jorge is my friend. I did not go there for sex. No matter what you think. And before you say something,” Marc grips Dani’s wrist tightly at the words, “the only reason I didn’t answer you when you asked me was pride. The mere fact that you thought I might be capable of that hurt me so badly, hurt my ego so badly that I didn’t want to answer you. I was so angry, I wanted you to believe you were right. And I’m sorry, that was stupid.” Marc pauses, but when Dani wants to say something, he presses a finger against the older rider’s lips and shakes his head. _I really have to say this first. Sorry._ “And I know why you didn’t want to talk to me and I’m sorry I didn’t see it earlier. I’m sorry that I forgot how different our path has been and I am sorry that you have the impression that you are more replaceable than me for the team. I am not sorry about my talent, I will never be, but I’m sorry if I contributed anything to you feeling that way.”  
Silence. Again. Marc nervously waits for Dani’s reply, staring at the moon. Suddenly, he feels his face being cupped and turned, Dani holding him so that their gazes lock and he sees the shine of tears in his – well, whatever he is now – face, his heart aching at the sight. “Don’t be sorry. I messed up. I should have talked to you. I should have known that I could. That was pretty dumb and childish and using my accident as an excuse to behave that way wasn’t my finest moment, especially considering that you have been there before.” Another pause, another gulp and nervousness still flooding Marc’s veins, even when he thinks that Dani’s eyes actually show that affection again that they lacked so badly when they broke apart.  
“And I know I should have trusted you more, but what I don’t understand is how we went downhill so quickly. Are we taking things to fast?” _Are we. Not WERE we. ARE. Present tense._ Marc’s heart jumps.  
Shaking his head determinedly, he replies, “No. I don't want to slow down. We shouldn't have to. If we are what I think we are, then we don't slow down and all the hurry is not what worries me. Speed never does.” They both chuckle briefly, before Marc continues, voice urgent and serious now. “What worries me, really, deep down bothers me, that’s how from such a rather small, tiny thing we could have an explosion like this. If we want to go for better and worse, how do we want to manage that if the accident is breaking us apart? If this already throws us so completely off track?”  
Dani is still holding his face, their intense gazes locked and Marc sees the affection and love, fully returned into Dani’s puddles of mocha. Right now, he cannot even say how happy it makes him.  
“Do you think we can fix it?” He hears the uncertainty in Dani’s voice and instead of an answer, he leans forward, their lips gently brushing against each other’s, before he breaks the kiss again, gazes locked immediately.  
Nodding at Dani, Marc whispers, “I don’t think.” He hears Dani inhale sharply and hurries to continue. “I KNOW we can.” He has hardly finished, when a sobbing Dani Pedrosa throws himself around his neck, coming to sit on his lap and Marc’s own tears run freely, while they’re sitting there, clinging to each other as if they were holding on to dear life, nails digging into flesh sharply, foreheads against each other. Marc knows that they have not finished talking, that there is a lot of unresolved baggage for them, but for the night, they have said enough. 

_Anyway that you'll take me_

Alex didn’t want to go to Marc’s party. Especially not now, where Marc and Dani are back. Not that he doesn’t want his brother happy. But it hurts to see them together because it reminds him of Marta so much. And hell, he hadn’t even wanted to be at his own party. Playing along for the team, he did, he made it, but now, after midnight, with most of them reasonably wasted, he just wants to hide in his hotel room and cry his heart out. And why are Clara and Jorge at his party in the first place?  
“Come on, mini champ, at least say hi to your brother.” Clara takes his arm, with more force than he would have expected from the petite blonde girl and drags him along, Jorge leading the way to a taxi. As much as he tries to bargain his way out of it, they drag him along. Ultimately, they are right; he has to say his congratulations at least. Certainly now, considering that Marc is talking to him again and even told him about Marta this morning. The most stupid thing Alex has done in his entire life, that much is sure. When the taxi stops in front of the place where Repsol is celebrating, Alex gulps, but he follows Clara and Jorge willingly, making their way through the cheery crowd. His eyes scan the room, failing to locate Marc or Dani and then, Clara opens the door to another, smaller room, some kind of conference room and he stumbles inside when Jorge pushes him, freezing the second he really looks inside.  
Nervously, he clears his throat, breath hitching uncomfortably and feeling close to fainting. He wills his voice to work and then, softly croaks, “Marta?”

_Anyway that you'll make me be part of you_

Jorge and Clara have decided to walk back to the hotel. It is a crisp night and Clara is comfortably cuddled up against Jorge under his leather jacket, head resting on his shoulder, stealing a drag from his cigarette.  
“I can’t believe you managed to do that,” he whispers into her hair, hand sliding into the back pocket of her jeans.  
“Me neither. But I think the trouble’s been worth it. At least, they’ll talk now.” She sighs and returns the cigarette, nuzzling her head even closer against the nape of his neck and her hand sliding under the waistband of his jeans, secretly admiring the firm muscles underneath.  
“Do you think she’ll forgive him?” Jorge’s voice sounds very distant and Clara just sighs again, thinking about the answer, events of the past 24 hours replaying in her head.  
“Well, I am sure she will never forget, he really, really hurt her. Obviously. But after all the tears she cried tonight and the way her eyes sparkled when he entered that room – yes, I think she will forgive him eventually.”

_Anyway that I know_

Nicky is half-sitting and half-lying on the bed, legs spread, wrists tied to the headboard, blindfolded with Vale's scarf. His skin is shivering and he is trembling, with the feeling of the Italian rider leaning over him, the hot breath against his chest burning him and the flicking of Vale's tongue making him go absolutely wild with desire, hips jerking up uncontrollably. As hard as he bites his lip, he cannot stop the moans from escaping and he hears Valentino's soft chuckles, obviously enjoying the power he has over him. And Nicky loves every bit of it, the feeling of letting go, being taken care of, losing himself to the man he loves. When Vale starts sucking on his collarbone, he surrenders willingly, allowing himself to drown in the myriad of sensations, all his focus on Vale's actions. He feels the tongue slide lower, further down his chests, fingers digging into his thighs. A careful nibble at his left nipple and the tongue moves again, brushing over the right nipple now and a desperate whimper falls from Nicky's lips.  
"You're so beautiful." A finger traces his jawline, brushes over his hair and Nicky trembles and moans, melting into the touch.  
Vale's tongue reaches his bellybutton and if it wasn't for the grip Vale's hand, holding his hip down firmly, he would have bucked up again. His entire body is covered in sweat, shaky with anticipation, his entire mind centralized on the Italian rider.  
"Please, Vale, now." He is breathless, desperate and sure that he cannot take it any longer, feeling as if he will explode and Valentino gives in to his desire, fulfils the unspoken request, a hot mouth swallowing him down hole. Once again, sharp nails dig into Nicky's hip, stopping him from jerking forward now, preventing him from choking Valentino. Valentino spoils him tonight, sucking beautifully, tongue doing unmentionable things that Nicky had no idea he wanted until he feels them, one hand playing with his balls, neither gentle nor rough, just right. Nicky drowns and falls and suffocates, flooded with desire, neediness and craving, unmanly noised leaving his mouth, swears falling from his lips between heavy panting. His hands battle with their restraints, yearning to touch back, to feel Vale, to pull him closer, urging him to be faster. It's the touch of Vale's other hand's fingers, tracing a line from his throat to his navel, then moving to pinch his nipples, that pushes Nicky over the edge, without even the time to warn Valentino. Slightly shocked but mostly too spaced out to care, Nicky comes down the Italian's throat with a loud growl, hips pushing forward. And Vale doesn't even cough. Instead, he licks him clean, drawing yelps and wincing from Nicky's mouth because of his oversensitivity right now. Then, Nicky feels the blindfold being removed and his hands are untied. Blinking against the light, he looks at Valentino, overwhelmed with the affectionate smile he finds on the other man's face. Still a bit shaky from the uncomfortable position, his hands reach out to cup Vale's face, pulling him in for a sloppy kiss, tasting himself on his lover's lips. When he feels himself composed enough to speak, he breaks their kiss, gaze lost in the blue sea of Vale's eyes.  
"That was perfect, more than I'd ever dared to hope for. And I love you."  
Vale reaches out with one hand, caressing his cheek and running it through his hair, eyes affectionate and fond. "I love you, too. And I think we should do this more often."

_If there's dreams in your heart_  
 _Where love lasts forever_  
 _From the depth of me soul_  
 _I'll make them come true_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song by The Troggs :)


	70. Mi Voluntad - My Will

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Close ;)
> 
> Again and again, thank you for the sweet comments, the kudos and the hits!! It's all much, much appreciated ♥
> 
> Hope you like this one, too, though it's only a short bridge, filling in some of the essentials that happened during the night.

Julia and Roser had only been at Marc's party for a brief moment, just like they'd only paid a short visit to Alex's party earlier. They'd had champagne with each of their sons, they'd exchanged knowing winks with Clara, they'd thanked Valentino, given Dani friendly hugs and then they have made their excuses and headed back to their hotel, willing to give their champions enough privacy to sort their business. They stand in front of the same window they faced a day ago, no rain this time and tentative smiles on their faces. Julia loosely wraps an arm around Roser's waist, pulling her against his side.  
Pressing a kiss in her hair, he whispers, "Didn't I say everything would be okay?"

"How are you doing? How is he doing?" Alex chokes, eyes darting between Marta's face and belly.  
She smiles, friendlier than he'd expected and takes his hand, putting it on the bump. He chuckles when his touch is greeted by a definite kick.  
"You go, son, daddy deserves it," he mumbles, cheeks turning pink.  
Marta's eyes scrutinize him. "Daddy?"  
"Yes, of course." He swallows down a lump. "God, I was so stupid. That was so stupid. Of course he is my son. I am so, so sorry." Alex pauses, gaze lowered now. "Sorry for everything. And I know I cannot make it up, but-"  
"No, you can't." Her voice is serious, but not cold and when he wants to pull his hand away, she keeps it against her stomach, his son still distributing small kicks against it. "But I can forgive. Not now, but eventually. I can and I have to." She presses his hand down even more firmly.  
Alex blinks against the tears, overwhelmed with the prospect that she still, after all he has done to her, considers giving him, them, a shot, even if she does it mainly for their child. _You're not shutting me out. And I couldn't have complained if you had done that._  
After a pause, tension around them not building further but not vanishing either, Alex blurts it out. "You're still wearing the ring."  
"Yes. I never took it off. I will now." Alex feels as if he's being hit and run over by a truck. "And no, it doesn't mean that. Really not. But you gave it to me in a hurry, rushing us. And I am not sure if you meant it or if maybe you did feel obliged to do it." Now he is just confused, but when he raises his voice to ask something, Marta interrupts him immediately, "No, let me finish, please. Take the ring back. And if you want to, keep it around. And let's try this again, only slower. Show me that I can trust you. And when you still feel like giving this to me in like... a month or a year, then you can ask me again."  
Not that he could ask for more and well aware that he is lucky to get this vague chance at all, Alex still feels as if he's being stabbed by the words and his hand trembles when Marta presses the ring inside. With teary eyes, he looks up to her, finding her eyes equally watery. It almost breaks him and he is dying from fear, but he has to know, so he wills his voice to obey and softly asks, "And what are we now?"  
"Let's try to become friends, that sounds like a feasible first step." Alex nods, too devastated for words right now. _I know, I'm lucky you're even talking to me. But this will be so hard because every time I see you I just want you to be mine._

"We have to tell them, Alberto."  
"I know. We will. Tomorrow. Let them have this night, let everybody have it. And tomorrow, we can discuss our options."  
"Actually, I'd have an idea."  
"You would?"  
"Yeah..."  
"So?"  
"Don't laugh or freak out, think about it before you do, okay?"  
"Don't be silly now and tell me."  
"Hayden."

After a while, Marc pulls away, explaining that he feels obliged to celebrate with the team and that's what they decide to do then. Dani accepts the necessity, albeit reluctantly. It's an idea he isn't exactly fond of. At times, the party feels a bit awkwardly as predicted, Dani not failing to notice the pity towards him and the curiosity regarding their relationship. However, in the end, Marc is right, it's a big night and it should be given proper credit. To Dani’s endless relief and gratitude, Santi is the one who finally releases them, broad smile on his face, hands on their backs.  
"Get out of here, you two. I'm sure you've got better things to do." And Dani wants to rub his eyes at the dirty smirk he gives them and chuckles at Marc's face, turning beautifully pink now. Though, to be honest, he feels heat rise into his cheeks as well.  
"We really should go," Marc mumbles, head nuzzled in his hair.  
"Only if you want to," Dani whispers, not wanting to interfere with Marc's plans on this.  
"I want nothing more than leave and be alone with you." Marc says and then, quickly adds, "To talk, okay?"  
Dani nods, clasping their hands. "Okay."  
They make their excuses and get ready to leave, but they are not let off the hook without being told by Emilio and Alberto that there will be a team meeting the next day, the thought of what is being discussed there sending a sting to Dani's guts and making Marc's hand clasp his even tighter.

Their managers made a bit of the tension come back up and the first part of their way, seated with a family-friendly gap between them in the backseat of a taxi, is spent in silence. It's Dani who breaks the ice after a while, hand cupping Marc's knee, head dropping to Marc's shoulder and, as if the entire weekend never happened, Marc's arm drapes around Dani, pulling him closer, pressing them closer. _Home. It feels like home._ Suddenly, the tension seems to dissolve, falling from them and with relief washing over him, Marc feels Dani relax under his touch. He pays for the taxi, determinedly holding down Dani's hand when the other rider wants to reach for his money and he gets out first, holding the door for Dani, quickly and possessively placing his arms around the smaller man's waist and leading him inside. In his head, the decision has long been made, but when he passes the reception without stopping, wordlessly making it totally clear that their, then Dani's, then his room now is their room again, his legs tremble slightly and he is afraid that his heart beats loud enough for Dani to hear. In front of the elevator, waiting for the doors to open, he feels his cheeks cupped by Dani, face pulled so that they look at each other. Marc stares into Dani eyes, finding every answer he ever wanted or needed in them and absentmindedly licks over his bottom lip, immediately seeing sparks of pure desire flash up in Dani's eyes.  
"We have a lot to talk." Dani coughs.  
Marc runs a hand through the smaller man's hair, his thump pushing a stray streak out of Dani's forehead. Lowering his voice, he half-whispers, half-growls, "I know, but we can still do that tomorrow, right?"  
Dani looks up to him through his lashes, nodding slowly. When he speaks now, the older rider's voice is hoarse. "We're not taking it slow?"  
Marc slides his hands down Dani's sides, letting them rest right on Dani's waist and slowly shakes his head. "No. I don't think so. Do you want to?" While he anxiously waits for Dani’s response, pulse racing already, he realizes how much he really doesn’t want to take a step back. _I want you. Now. Later. Always. Only you._   
Shaking his head as well and biting down on his lip, Dani's fingers clench in Marc's hair. "Never."  
"Our room?" The elevator doors open and Marc lets go of Dani, making a tentative step towards them, holding out one hand.  
Pure relief washes over him, when Dani takes the hand and squeezes it, moving to follow him. "Yes," Dani presses a kiss to his neck. "Our room."

_Yo quisiera estar siempre contigo._


	71. Self Control

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No plot tonight ♥  
> I'm still working on my strategy how to break the news to everybody. Until then, enjoy ;)

Dani pushes Marc into the elevator and right against the walls, teeth gritting. His hands are clutching to the collar of Marc's shirt and he shivers when Marc's fingers find their way under his clothes, nails scraping over his spine before settling to dig into his hips. _God, I missed you so badly and it's hardly been a day._ They're both already breathless and their bodies, pressed flush against each other, give away their state of arousal unmistakably. Not for the first time in their relationship, and Dani prays to God that they are still or again in a relationship, Dani notices that Marc is making him hard as easily as if he were still a teenager and it's not even embarrassing him anymore, especially not as he is doing the same to the younger rider, whose bulge is pressing right against his, Marc having spread his legs once again to accomodate for their height difference. The sound of the elevator arriving at their floor makes them break away, panting, lips coated with saliva and Dani drinks in the image of Marc's ruffled head, cheeks blushed, eyes black with desire. Their gazes lock intensely for a moment and Dani is surprised how off-guard he catches Marc, how he can read all the lust but also all the leftover pain and uncertainty and it makes him hold his breath for an instant, noise of their heavy breathing filling the air. Only when Marc slowly nods, affirming that the decision to keep rushing still stands and the elevator threatens to close on them again, does Dani take the younger man's hand, pulling him along towards _their_ room and Marc steps up quickly, a possessive lanky arm finding its way around Dani's waist and he is genuinely grateful that in their current, absolutely dishevelled state with their shirts pulled out and partly unbuttoned and their faces giving away everything and more they've just done, they don't run into anybody in the hallway and then they reach their door and he sees the slight trembling in Marc's fingers when he slides the keycard down. _Nervous. I'm still making you nervous. THIS is still making you nervous._

Marc shoves both of them inside, keycard dropped to the floor, hands in Dani's waist, lips locking once again, another demanding kiss, roughness increasing and taste of blood undeniable. Their moans and gasps fill the room and Dani is clinging to Marc's collar again while between them, Marc is unbuckling their belts and unzipping their jeans eagerly. The touch of Marc's fingers over the fabric of his boxers makes Dani's hips jerk forward and he is sure Marc noticed, as the younger man deliberately repeats the moves, fingertips ever so slightly brushing over the same spot. Dani's grip on Marc's collar tightens, but the younger man doesn't complain and just keeps shoving their clothes down. They step out of pants and boxers, shoes and socks, their lips never breaking apart and Marc's fingers now busy with the buttons of their shirts, Dani's hand searching for a new place to hold on to and finding it in Marc's neck. With most of their clothes gone already, their cocks are making direct contact, their hips rolling for friction and it feels so good that they are leaking precome and their moans get louder by the second. Marc's shirt is the first to hit the floor now and then he slides down Dani's, his fingertips running over the smaller rider's arms and the sensation makes Dani shudder. The same fingertips now move over his naked chest, playing teasingly slow with his nipples and brushing over his sensitive sides, causing countless shivers to run down his spine. 

Marc breaks their kiss, both of them panting again and Dani instinctively leans forward, closing the last bit of gap between their chest, while Marc's hands reach around him, coming to rest on the small of his back. Once again, their gazes lock, Marc's eyes still completely readable, demanding for more. Dani is revelling in the feeling that he is desired. And not just by anyone, he is desired by Marc Marquez, MotoGP legend at 21, gorgeous body, toned muscles everywhere, softest skin Dani's ever come across, glowing now with a sheen of sweat and slightly flushed, beautiful face, currently blushed, stray streaks of hair clinging to his forehead, full lips, slightly swollen at the moment and wet with their mixed saliva, parted because he is still gasping for air. That Marc Marquez. _And he wants ME._ With a single move, Dani runs his fingers down Marc’s spine, nails scraping the line, tracing every vertebra on the way and he can feel Marc shudder under the touch, back arching and hips jerking forward. A whimper falls from the younger man’s mouth and his eyes, if possible, turn even darker. Dani is still trying to figure out how they will play this tonight, unsure whether Marc is waiting for him to take initiative and barely able to focus on anything coherently with Marc’s thumbs rubbing over his skin and Marc’s cock sliding against his. And as they’ve gracefully avoided any longer conversation about their fallout, he doesn’t even know if they’re okay and who was right or wrong or whatever and then he stares into Marc’s eyes again and the last bit of thinking is gone from his brain, the intensity of the dark eyes staring at him throwing him in a state of complete lust.

With his arm still around Marc’s waist, he pulls him along, letting himself fall backwards on the mattress. While he shuffles to have his head up in the pillows and splaying his body out for Marc, wanting to over himself, to surrender, to be Marc’s yet again, Marc understands the wordless gesture with ease, crawling over him and coming to straddle his lap, hands pinning his wrists down and then, teasingly slow, bending down for another passionate kiss which he breaks a bit later, his mouth moving to Dani’s throat and his body repositioned kneeling between Dani’s legs. Dani’s hand is desperately clutching to the sheets and he is panting heavily when Marc starts sucking little bruises on his collarbones. When Marc’s tongue reaches his left nipple, darting out to lick it and nibbling carefully, Dani growls, his back arching impatiently already. Marc just smiles up to him through his lashes then, licking his lips, completely teasing and seducing, successfully driving Dani towards oblivion. 

Dani’s eyes wander over the parts of Marc he can see, coming to rest on his arms, the muscles tense because he’s been holding himself up for a while right now and it’s gorgeous. Marc’s tongue continues the way down his body, spilling kisses over his stomach now, his chin sometimes brushing against Dani’s erection, each time sending a little electric bolt through his guts and making his hips buck up. When there’s a tentative poke into his bellybutton, Dani desperately takes hold of Marc’s hair.   
“God, Marc. Please.” He pants and the words come out breathless.  
“Please what?” Marc’s voice is seductively low and he is looking up to him through lashes again, eyes faking innocence. _As if I’d fall for that look anymore and would believe it for a second._  
“Fuck me.” Dani is growling, back arched and hand digging into Marc’s scalp, while the younger man presses a kiss on his tip that almost throws him over the edge. _Tease._  
“With pleasure.” Marc bites into Dani’s hip now, sucking another bruise and Dani would blush at the swears that involuntarily fall from his lips if he wasn’t already flushed.

Eyes on Marc, he notices how the younger man sits back on his heels now, reaching for the bedside drawer and without hesitation, Dani’s hand stops Marc mid-movement, shaking his head slowly. “Not tonight. I want to feel you properly.” _I really do. Don’t ask me why, I couldn’t tell you if my life depended on it, but I need this._  
Dani sees an inscrutable flash of something in Marc’s eyes, quickly replaced by worry. “It’s going to hurt.”  
“I want it to.” Dani holds Marc’s gaze and speaks with an extra low voice, not failing to have an effect on the younger man whose eyes turn blackest black now, desire written all over his face and tongue licking lips absentmindedly again.  
“Okay.” Marc nods, maybe more to himself than to Dani and Dani intuitively reaches for Marc hand, starting to suck on the younger rider’s fingers with dedication. It’s Marc’s turn to release a string of murmured swears now, followed by an impatient growl.

Dani lets go of Marc’s hand, spreading his legs just a bit further and trying to brace himself for the inevitable short pain, knowing that it will be rewarded with pure bliss eventually.  
“Ready?” Still propped up on now trembling arms, Marc throws him another intense, questioning look and Dani holds it, nodding determinedly.  
It’s Marc’s cue to go for it, single finger pressing against Dani’s entrance now. Dani squeezes his eyes shut, suppresses the wince by biting down on his lip and wills his muscles to relax around Marc, who pushes forward slowly but steadily. The burn is familiar on one side and more intense than usual on the other, but Dani knows he can manage, wills himself to breathe and to give in. The second finger makes him wince loudly though and Marc stills his movement. His eyes still shut, Dani hears a breathless, “Sure?” and nods again. _Yes. Yes. Yes. Just do it, now._ It’s agonizingly slow and Dani cannot even imagine how this feels for Marc, how much self-control the younger rider currently has to bring up. After minutes of focused breathing and with Dani’s fist clenched tightly in the immaculate white sheets, Dani feels the third finger and this time it’s a bit easier, though the stretch is still overwhelming. It’s the knowledge that he’s almost made it that makes him go through now, even pushing back against Marc’s hand, wanting him to move. _Make me yours. Just make me yours and never ever let go again._ Marc complies, entering in a slow rhythm of forward and back, tentatively curling his fingers. It doesn’t take long before the younger rider finds the right spot and stars are dancing in front of Dani’s eyes, another row of swears coming from his mouth and his back arching up. He hears a soft chuckle from Marc and then Marc continues his movements, picking up a bit of speed and relentlessly aiming for that same spot over and over again, so that Dani’s head falls even further back into the pillows, hand holding on to the sheets as if clinging to dear life, mouth moaning and whimpering with increasing urgency and hips bucking to meet each move.   
“Marc, please, more.” Dani presses the words out, only thoughts on his mind revolving around just this _More Marc. More Marc._

Marc pulls his hand back immediately and the strange emptiness draws a disappointed wince from Dani, even though he knows that it’s only for an instant. Then, the pressure returns, the burn comes back, when Marc starts burying himself in Dani, moving unbearably slow again. _Really, how do you even do that? How do you hold back so well?_ Finally releasing the sheets, Dani’s hand finds Marc’s hair, pulling his head down for a kiss, their lips loosely on each other, tongues exploring lazily, occasional breaks for panting and catching breath. Marc thrusts into him faster now, harder, hitting the right spot again and almost making Dani scream into the kiss. With his hips pushing back against Marc, Dani wraps his legs around the taller rider, encouraging him to be even rougher, to take him to his limits and Marc understands the wordless clues well enough. Loud moans fill the room along with the obscene noises of flesh against flesh and Dani really wonders how long Marc can keep up his position. After the long way to get here, neither of them has the stamina to last much longer anyway though and when Marc’s fingers circle his cock now, smearing precome around it and stroking firmly, Dani barely manages a breathless “Close.” before he comes between their stomachs, Marc’s name on his lips. Under Marc’s last vigorous pushes, with Marc’s hand still riding him out, he winces, everything feeling a bit too much right now, his mind in an almost blissful state of oversensitivity. He blinks his eyes open, for the first time in a while, marvelling Marc’s face, coming undone in front of him, looking beautiful as ever and he feels the tension in Marc’s muscles, recognizes the familiar hitch in the younger rider’s breath before Marc comes inside of him, Dani’s name now echoing through the room. With the shaky arms probably denying service now, the younger man collapses on top of him and Dani wraps an arm around his back, holding him close, nuzzling his head in the nape of Dani’s neck, body and mind floating away into a weightless and thoughtless afterglow. _I just never want this to end. Never ever._

After a while, and still on a wave of bliss and content, he distantly feels Marc pull out and wrap himself around him. Marc buries his head against Dani’s now, his breath hot against Dani’s ear.  
“That was amazing.”  
Dani nods and swallows. “Oh yes. It was.”  
Silence falls over them and Dani reaches to take one of Marc’s hands, lacing their fingers. With a hoarse voice and a racing pulse, he finally asks the one question he probably should have asked before they even went to _their_ room. “Are we okay?”

_A safe night, I'm living in the forest of a dream_  
 _I know the night is not as it would seem_  
 _I must believe in something, so I'll make myself believe it_  
 _That this night will never go_


	72. Turn On Your Light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still out of "normal" POV. They're just too much fun to ignore ♥

It's cool outside, they're shivering and it's closer to morning than to night when Vale and Nicky come back to their room, both still wound up from the party, ecstasy from their successful plot not fully worn off. Vale is slightly surprised that Nicky is still awake, considering the American's usual habit of keeling over at the first opportunity. Now however, his lover is looking at him, eyes serious, mouth smiling, an arm around Vale's waist.  
"Another one?" Nicky holds up a box of cigarettes and nods towards the balcony. Valentino sighs and nods. _There is something in your look that worries me, you know? This is not about a harmless cigarette. Also, your voice is trembling. Don't think I haven't noticed._  
They lean over the railing, arms against in each other, sharing a bit of body warmth and smoking in silence. Nicky tells some of his usual stories, most of which Vale knows already, but he feels comfortable with the sound of Nicky's voice and with a sideways glance, studies the Ducati rider's face, the perfect proportions always fascinating him. Nothing looks out on place, every line seems drawn purposefully in an exactly calculated angle. Absentmindedly, he traces over Nicky's temple, a finger running through the short black hair. It's comforting, peaceful, that very feeling of being home that always spreads over him when the American is there. Until something that Nicky says, casually mentions, as if it doesn't mean anything, catches the Italian's attention. 

"Wait, what?" Valentino's fingers stop in the middle of their movement.  
Nicky slowly turns his head, eyes meeting his and clears his throat. "I'm taking Dani's seat for the next season."  
"Why?" Thoughts are running havoc in Vale's head and he runs his hands through his hair and rubs his face, wanting to get his mind clear and awake enough for this conversation.  
"Because I can." Nicky reaches out and takes one of his hands, eyes on their laced fingers. "Because I want one good season before I retire."  
 _Retire? You can't retire! I need you!_ Vale coughs, free hand running through his hair again. "Retire?" It comes out weak and croaky.  
"Yes," Nicky nods, still looking down on their hands and it makes Vale angry that he's not even looking in his eyes. "Actually, that's why they'll give it to me."  
Confusion spreads over Valentino's face. _That doesn't even make sense. Maybe Nicky is drunk after all?_ "What?"  
Nicky repeats, voice soft and warm, "Because I will retire at the end of the season."  
"Why does it matter for them?" Maybe the alcohol is making him slow on the intake, but Vale has no idea where this is going.  
"Because they are still not sure if Dani's decision and diagnosis are permanent and they want him to have a theoretical perspective. Emilio said he and Shuhei figured the little man might change his mind if he's left in peace for a while." Aside the fact that Emilio is the wrong manager, that even does make sense. Vale shakes the thoughts off his head, this is not about Dani, this about Nicky.

He clears his throat and with a single finger under Nicky's chin, he turns the American's face towards him, tilting it up far enough to finally meet Nicky's gaze. "And you want to retire?" He says, exchanging an intense gaze with his lover, who nods under his scrutinizing eyes.  
"Yes," he hears Nicky take a deep breath, "We can't all be like you, you know? And at the end of next year, I want to retire and regardless of what you do, I want to settle and I want us to marry and I want to adopt a child. Or 2. Or a dozen. And then I want family time. And peace. And you can keep racing for as long as you want and I and whoever else belongs to our family will travel with you as much as I or we can, and I will happily work for your company or team, but I won't have that pressure on me anymore, I won't have to torture my body and I won't be in constant pain. You know, ever since we stumbled out of the closet and officially lived together, I have loved that feeling of coming home to someone, everytime, after every race and every event and it's been addictive, it's made me crave more of that." 

Nicky is looking at him nervously and then starts fidgeting with another cigarette. Heart thundering in his chest, Vale stares at the American’s clumsy, shaky fingers. The Italian is still confused, overwhelmed with information, but basically, his attention had frozen at a very specific point of Nicky’s little speech and he is still in complete disbelief at what he thinks he just heard there.  
Swallowing hard and his hand gripping Nicky's shoulder sharply, he gulps, "Marry?"  
"Yes," Nicky's hands find their way around his waist and he sees a beautiful smile spread over the American rider's face. "I would love to be Mr. Rossi. If you'll have me."

"You want to marry and have a family? I mean, you did say something about kids..." Vale's grip on Nicky's shoulder tightens and he stares into the other man's face, noticing the still warm smile, the sparkling eyes, the almost invisible nod and with a trembling voice, he continues. "But we talked about that and I thought -" His voice fails him completely now, because the unspoken question lingering between them, the hopes that are beginning to rise inside of him. These are the biggest unresolved pieces of his life and he feels so close to having his dreams come true that his chest is almost bursting with his nervous heartbeat.  
His mind still in complete confusion, too many thoughts chasing him at once, Valentino feels himself pulled into an embrace, Nicky’s arms holding him tight, steadying him, because his legs are starting to fail him now, too. His forehead instinctively falls to Nicky's shoulder, the familiar smell calming his nerves a little. On top of his head, he feels Nicky prop up his chin and then, words vibrating through his skull, hears the American whisper with a chuckle, "Never too late to change my mind, don't you think? And yes, as many as you want."

_I think you feel the same way too_  
 _You know you make my dreams come true_


	73. Everything's Okay

Are we okay? The question is ringing in Marc's head. Truth to be told, he has no idea. And maybe it's too late to ask it now? After what they've just done? With a sigh, he lets go off Dani's hand, sits up on the bed and rubs over his face, suddenly feeling extremely weary. "Balcony and cigarettes?" He shoots Dani a quick glance and sees the smaller rider nod hesitantly. Marc gets up from the bed and rummages for his jeans. While he pulls up the zipper, he sees Dani get up, trying to hide a cringe and a wince.  
"I'm sorry. Is it very bad?" _Oh dear, I didn't want to hurt you._  
"It's okay. Could be worse." Dani tries a smile, but it looks pretty much faked and Marc frowns while he waits for the smaller man to get dressed. They both slide into their team hoodies in perfect sync and Marc wraps an arm around Dani's waist, steadying him on the way out.  
"Sit or stand?" He asks, pressing a kiss against Dani's temple.  
"Stand." So he lets Dani lean over the railing and props himself up right behind him, groin against Dani's ass, chest on Dani's back. He lights a cigarette for each of them and they smoke in silence for a while, their breath and the smoke evaporating into small greyish clouds, chilly breeze making them shiver and the night very slowly dissolving into dawn.

"I don't know. Are we okay?" Marc leans his head against Dani's shoulder, feeling the tense, defined muscles underneath and he hears Dani take a deep breath.  
"I... I think I should explain things to you." An audible gulp and Marc nods against Dani's hoodie. _You really should. Though I think I figured out a fair share by now._  
"So, why didn't you talk to me?" Marc coughs, pulse racing while he waits for what Dani wants to say and then he hears Dani, seemingly far away, voice suddenly so distant.  
"Because I hate being injured. Because I hate that dependence. Because I can't even cut my own food properly sometimes. Because as much as you tried to never make me notice, it's always there, it's always visible, noticeable. Because I can't even hug you the way I should. And because the one thing that defined me all my life has been taken from me and I'm not myself anymore and I'm scared out of my mind that you won't love me anymore when I'm not myself anymore. Because you said I was your idol and now I'm just broken and hopeless and weak and not only do I constantly lose against you, I can't even fight back and I hate feeling so small and vulnerable and dependent and weak."   
Dani's voice fails, a loud sniff coming from him and his back shuddering slightly, everything leading Marc to conclude that Dani is crying. It's breaking his heart, shattering it into little pieces and it's driving him mad, because as much as he wanted to do something or anything, he cannot do it, cannot make it any better. Feeling lost and helpless, he rubs his hands over Dani's arms, his head still nuzzled in Dani's neck.  
After a while, the shuddering ceases and with a croaky voice, Dani continues. "Goddammit Marc, I might not even have an income next year and it's freaking me out, but I don't want to hold on to hopes that clearly don't exist anymore."

The anger he had felt has vanished, Marc knows that much. It's gone, dissolved, no remains to be found. Right now, all he feels is pain, ache and the heart-breaking desire to change things. It's a horrible feeling, way worse than post 2011, because this time he's so powerless, so out of control and that's not his type of situation. And the emotional worry about Dani, as usual, turns into physical pain, nausea and panic. _Dani, you have no idea what you're doing to me. This is something I've never had with anyone in my life. Not even Alex and I are that close._ Marc drops his cigarette and releases a breath he didn't know he was holding. Then, he clears his throat and gathers his last bit of coherent thinking, knowing that whatever he says next is far from meaningless chatter or careless banter. It's likely the most important thing he ever has to tell Dani.  
"Okay, listen, I just- I want to try to explain how I feel about it then. I was so angry when you didn't tell me, so, so angry. Because I want you to trust me and I felt that you didn't and I think you still don't, but I understand. I really do. I'm sorry I didn't before, I do now. I understand that it must be bad to feel like someone else, but please, believe me when I say that you haven't changed the least for me, that it doesn't matter whether you race or not and whether you cut your own meat or not. And it doesn't matter how you hug me as long as you do," Marc needs a pause to catch his breath and get rid of the lump that's building in his throat and blink away the tears in his eyes. "And I see that I never told YOU properly, while you did that for me, and I am so sorry that it took me so long, but I will say it now. I love you, I love your honesty, the way you care about everyone, the way you will even treat your worst enemy with respect, the way you can be completely serious and responsible one moment and a giddy teenager the next second, the way you'd do anything for me, even if it's ridiculous, I love the way you smile and grin and chuckle and I love the way you kiss me and touch me, the way you can make me feel, the sparks in your eyes when you see me, that always tell me that you want me." Marc takes another deep breath. "And I kind of think you're smoking hot, too." He hears Dani chuckle briefly, relieved that the other man got the reference and then he wraps his arms around Dani's chest and squeezes him as tightly as he can. "I love YOU. And I want you to learn to trust me, okay?"  
He doesn't get a response from Dani, only a squeeze against his hands that are folded on Dani's chest now and a soft sniffing, so he adds another bit to his rant, feeling that he is all in now anyway and wanting to get everything on the table for once.   
"And what you said, it made me hurt, it caused me pain, but I'd rather have that then you not telling me. I don't know what it is about you that makes me so protective. Maybe at the end of the day, I feel like I have dragged you into all of this, made you gay and had you end up in a really complicated mess. I don't know. But I feel protective and I care about you more than about anybody else. And Dani, I am so, so sorry I left you alone that night. I was so stupid and so selfish and I should never have put my pride over you."

"Don't be sorry." Dani is merely whispering and Marc has to focus hard to understand him now. "And Marc, listen, I am sorry, too. Because I keep seeing you as the cheery kid that we all meet in the paddock and I sometimes forget to give you proper credit for what you've accomplished, for how you've survived 2011 and how you've dealt with 2013. I can't imagine being twenty and having an enemy like Jorge Lorenzo to deal with. And maybe you got me into a bit of a mess, but if you did, than it's the most beautiful, wonderful, amazing mess I've ever been in and I don't want to change anything about what we did."  
There's a long pause after that, Marc not knowing what to respond and Dani apparently out of words as well. When he feels he cannot take the tension anymore, Marc presses his lips close to Dani's ear.   
"Okay for now?" His voice is hoarse again.  
Dani responds with another squeeze of his hands. "Yes, okay for now." _I hope you understood what I said and I hope you know that you’ll always be my idol and that I’d never ever do any of the things you were afraid I’d do._

_Keep giving me hope for a better day_  
 _Keep giving me love to find a way_


	74. Good Feeling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the lack of update yesterday, I couldn't get to a computer.  
> Today's a brief one, too, things should get back to normal soon though ♥  
> Thank you for the incredible feedback!

They meet Alberto and Emilio the next morning, right after breakfast. Marc cannot help the chuckle when Dani bites his lip and desperately tries to hide his limping, but the frown returns to his face the second they take their seats and Dani would kick him under the table if he wasn't so nervous himself. It ends up a very brief conversation, owed also to their impending flight and it leaves Dani utterly lost and confused. Judging by Marc's facial expression, that's true for the younger rider, too. Their way to the airport, photographed by numerous fans this time, is a wordless one. It's not because there's anything wrong between them, their hands are clasped, fingers laced and Dani doesn't feel any of the tension that usually surrounds them when they're upset. It's just that right now, they cannot speak because they have to think, digest and process what they heard. And then there's two other people they should talk to.

They've boarded already when Dani finally clears his throat and starts speaking. "We have to call Nicky and Vale, right?"  
"Does their opinion matter?" Marc squeezes his hand. He is staring out of the window so that Dani cannot see his face, but his voice didn't sound upset, only curious.  
"Well, not really." Dani looks at his own hands, searching for the slight differences between functioning and non-functioning hand.  
"See? And our opinion doesn't matter either.” Marc shrugs. “Repsol offered it to him, I'm damned sure he'll accept and that's it. They weren't asking us for permission, they just told us the inevitable."  
"And what do we think about it?” Dani’s eyes stay glued to his hands, unsure, whether he wants to see Marc’s reaction. "I don't know about you, but I could live with it. I get along with Nicky, I doubt you'd be worried about him and I think it's a good opportunity for you to reconsider." Another shrug, Dani can feel the movement against his shoulder. "I don't want to reconsider,” he insists. _No more rollercoaster. Clean cut and that’s it._ "I know. They know. But we're all not sure, how long that will hold." Marc suddenly cups his face, forcing him to lock gazes with his lover.   
"What if it does hold?" Dani asks with a trembling voice and he feels Marc scrutinize him.   
"Someone else gets the seat and that's going to be okay, too. God, Alex could take it until then."   
"You think so?" Dani raises an eyebrow, interest sparked.   
"Well, he'll be 20 then, I was twenty when I moved up, too. So, yeah, even Alex could be an option then." _Wow, so much pride in your eyes. You still believe in him. Maybe now more than ever? Have you told him? Because you should._  
"Okay." Dani smile, finally feeling like a whole mountain has been lifted from his chest.  
"Okay?" Marc’s eyebrows jerk up.  
"Yes, okay. I think I can get used to that." Dani leans forward, presses a peck to Marc’s cheek and drops his head back against the headrest.   
He hears Marc chuckle next to him, feels the reassuring squeeze of his hand again and Marc's head dropping to his shoulder, hair tickling his ear slightly. _Home. Wherever you are there’s home._

It's a while of silence again, before Dani raises another issues, one that's been on his mind for a bit now.   
"Have you heard anything from Alex and Marta?"   
"Well, I haven't really fixed things with Alex yet. But Jorge..."   
Dani feels Marc's hesitancy at the mention of the name and gives his knee a reassuring pat.   
"Don't worry, I'm okay with him, so what did Jorge say?"   
"He said they talked for a bit, there was no yelling and they left together, but didn't touch. He thinks they're on mostly friendly terms now. And apparently, Marta returned the ring."   
_Yeah... about that... what do WE do regarding the ring?_

There's not a word said about it, the question lingering between them, weighing heavy on Dani's heart. _Should I ask you again? Should I just give it back? Do you even want it?_   
Marc keeps staring out of the window, not giving him a single clue to what he thinks about it and then there's the sign that they have to put their seatbelts back. While they're beginning to land, Dani swallows against the lump building in his throat and then decides to change the topic, because right now, the uneasy kind of silence is crawling back upon them.   
"So, who's picking us up from the airport?"

It's Roser who is taking them home, Julia, Alex and Marta all had returned earlier and Julia had taken the young couple right to one of Marta's doctor's appointments. And the mere fact that they were going there together had Roser and Marc almost in tears when she told them and Dani has to admit that it brings him close to tears himself. _They'll get there. With those friends and parents they just have to._

And at night, news from the doctor thoroughly positive and a tentative smile playing around Alex’s lips, Marc and Alex celebrate with whole Cervera and Marc takes Dani along and it's overwhelming, unbelievable and gorgeous. Against all odds, their relationship is no topic among the fans, they always get a lot of cheering when Marc presses the occasional kiss to his lips and it makes Dani shiver. He's bursting with pride and joy, overwhelmed with everything and simply on the verge of tears all the time, while he watches and listens, to fireworks, songs, cheers, speeches. At some point during a very wild and drunk night, he sees Marc steady a trembling Alex, both slurring incomprehensible things at each other, laughing loudly and arms around each other's shoulder. _I guess you don't have to fix anything anymore._ And there's so much pride in Marc's eyes when he cheers on a dancing Alex, holding up his trophy, that it makes Dani's heart jump again, marvelling Marc’s perfect face and gorgeous body along with these beautiful, proud eyes. _I can’t believe you want ME._

They make their way back home in the early morning, Marta probably the only one who'd remember any of it the next day and constantly reminding the three men to speak with a softer voice, though without success. They stumble along the driveway, trying to steady each other, Marc unceremoniously crashing into a shrub and Alex falling face first in front of the doorstep. They end up falling into their beds exhausted, tired, worn out and incredibly happy and one of the memories that flashes up in Dani's wound up head, still to giddy to drift away, is the image of Marta taking Alex's hand, on that doorstep, pulling him up, staring at Alex with those warm and loving eyes and all her affection had been back and then she'd pressed a peck to the teenager's forehead. And then, Dani had looked into Marc's face, who had seen everything as well, and his lover had been beaming, before locking eyes with him - and when Marc locked their gazes, his eyes had been filled with all the affection Dani had been craving so much for the past days and all over sudden, the world had been full of fireworks and butterflies again. Next to him, Marc is shuffling under the sheet restlessly, trying to find a comfortable position with his head on Dani's chest. After a while, movement finally stilled, Marc's chin against Dani’s ribcage and the words vibrating through his bones, he hears the younger man's voice, a bit hoarse, a bit low, more hesitant than usual and the words make Dani's heart stop beating and his blood freeze. "So, about that ring..."

_Good feeling won't you stay with me_   
_just a little longer_


	75. Need You Now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that many were asking for this to be different. I am sorry. I hope you're not too disappointed. ♥

"The ring." Dani states it soft and with a trembling voice and Marc cringes. They both roll over on their sides now, facing each other although despite the first light of dawn reaching the room, it's still too dark to read the other's face, hands tangled between them.  
Marc isn't sure how to say it but he knows he has to and after a while, his body in physical pain already, he blurts it out. "I don't think we should- You should-" He coughs, the tension unbearable and Dani's grip on his hand tightening. "I shouldn't have it. Not yet."  
He squeezes his eyes shot, afraid of Dani's reaction and holding his breath.  
Dani's voice is very soft, almost inaudible, when he replies, "I thought we weren't stepping back."  
It makes Marc swallow and it's breaking his heart to do this, although he knows it should be for the best. "I know, really. And I'm not saying I don't want it. Or didn't mean what I said. I really meant everything; I still mean everything. But I think it doesn't feel quite right yet. I want to wait for that one moment where everything falls into place and where our eyes lock and we know that _NOW_ is the moment. Can you understand? I don’t know how to explain that." He bites his lip, uncertain of Dani's opinion, scared to hurt the smaller rider. _And it's taking you too long to answer this._  
"I-" Marc hears the shakiness in Dani's voice and regrets everything, regardless of how much he knows that he's doing the right thing. "I thought, we weren't stepping back to take things slower." Dani repeats it, sounding hurt but not as if he was blaming Marc for all of it.  
"I know and we're not. Only with this. Because I want it to be special. The most special thing ever, not just a return to status quo or something like that."  
"Are you expecting another proposal?"  
"No, not really. I'm expecting that there'll just be a moment where I know that I'm ready. And I know I said I was ready before, but truth to be told, I wasn't. I've just proven that I suck at for better and for worse and you deserve better, you deserve that when I make that promise, I mean it." Marc has to swallow again, heart still breaking at the thought of causing Dani pain.  
Dani's thumb rubs over his hand and there's another long pause, crushing Marc's heart with anxiety, before the smaller rider presses a quick peck to his cheek, whispering into his ear, "I can't say I'm not sad. But I understand. And dammit, I can't believe you just beat me at maturity _again_ :"  
Marc chuckles at the words and pulls Dani into an embrace, holding him tightly and his lips searching Dani's ear, feeling gooseflesh on the smaller man's skin when his lips brush over his neck.   
"I need you, you know that, Dani? Whatever you think about yourself, I really need you. I couldn't do the spotlight, the attention, the focus on my and our sex life or the occasional hate posts on twitter if I didn't have you."  
There is no reply, but against his cheeks, Marc is very sure that Dani's skin is a bit damp now. 

Alex is splayed out on his back, waiting for the world to stop turning. Next to him, the mattress dips and he turns his head slightly, cringing at the pain, but even more overwhelmed with the surprised. "You're sleeping here?"   
With a smile somewhere between cheeky and coy, Marta reaches over him and turns off the lamp. With the obscure light of dawn now prevalent, Alex can no longer read her face well, but he can hear her voice, a somewhat ironic tone in it now. "Unless you're planning to kick your pregnant girlfriend out of the bed or throw up on her, yes, I am."  
Even with the haze of alcohol clouding his mind, the meaning of the word still reaches Alex's brain just fine and once they're fully processed, he gapes for a second, holding his breath, before he reaches to take Marta's hand.   
"You just said girlfriend."  
"Yes, I did."  
"And you mean it."  
"And I meant it."  
"And you're sleeping here. In my bed - not in the guest room."  
"Not in the guestroom."  
"Can I kiss you?"  
The pause after his question is the longest he's ever experienced in his life. Much longer even than the wait after he asked her to marry him. A felt eternity and more. Then, soft lips brush his ear, shivers running down his spine.   
"Yes. But not too long, you're drunk enough to intoxicate me and the baby with your breath," she whispers, hot breath burning his skin, words going straight to his guts, her chuckling slightly.   
It takes him all his courage and more to do this, probably it's worse than his first kiss even, but Alex manages. He manages to take a last breath, to wrap an arm around her when he snuggles up and to press his lips against hers, tightly, not daring to part his mouth or get tongues involved, but long and close enough for it to not be seen as a friendly kiss. And he feels her hand reach into his hair, running through it and making him shiver and tremble.   
"I missed you," he presses out, parting their mouths after a long moment, mind still foggy and slow and now totally lost in the sensation of _her_ , clouded with lust for her, drunk no longer from alcohol but from smelling, feeling and hearing _her_.  
"I did, too." She turns around, pressing her back against his chest, snuggling up close and he instinctively wraps his arms around her, their hands meeting on her bump, their son having a peaceful moment right now. Alex laces their fingers and releases a breath he's been holding forever, while she noticeably relaxes into the touch.   
He swallows determinedly. "God, I need you so much."  
"We need you to." She lifts their hands, presses a kiss on his and then moves them back onto her belly. "We need you so much."

Roser steps out on the terrace in the first morning light and chuckles at the sight of a flustered Julia, trying to dispose his cigarette quickly.   
“Don’t you think I smell that?”  
She hears him sigh before he responds, “I’m sorry.”  
“I know, you will be when I stop kissing you.”  
“Ouch.”  
“Just kidding. I can understand. After the past week, we can all use any form of relaxation we can find.”  
He gets up from his chair now and she sees his silhouette approaching her, feels his arms wrap around her waist, his head nuzzle in her neck and she smells the smoke, but it doesn’t bother her, because in the end, she’s just glad to be in safe in his arms. She knows she needs him, she has missed him a lot when she was alone with Marta. And she couldn’t deal with all of this by herself, never ever. It would break her heart into pieces.  
“I’d have an idea to make _you_ more relaxed.” The snarl in his voice is obvious.  
“Do you?” Her arms reach around his back, squeezing him. “Even when both of our children in and their significant others are staying with us?”  
“I have my ways.” He chuckles, the low sound vibrating through her body, making her shiver.  
“I think all these lovesick youngster around the place plant silly ideas in your head,” she says, suppressing a chuckle and kissing his cheek. _Not that I mind, oh no._

_But I lost all control_   
_And I need you now_


	76. Next To Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, thank you loads for the feedback! You cannot imagine how much it means ♥
> 
> And it's another "bridge-chapter", but this one is the last for the moment, tomorrow's will be better ♥

The next weeks just run through their fingers, filled, no, crowded with interviews, photo shoots, flights and drives and hotels. Often, Dani fights an internal war to calm his nerves, to relax, suppressing the hint of jealousy that you can hardly avoid when your boyfriend - whom you'd rather call your fiancé - is living the life of your dreams. And when all you want to do is to hide, in your house, that you want to be both of yours, but don't know if your significant other still feels that way, time too busy to discuss the essentials. Regarding the stress, Marc, of course, has been there before, and Dani, at least to a certain degree, as well, but it's more this time, more interest, more curiosity, because now, with the season over and no race results to discuss, questions inevitably - and uncomfortably - shift towards them as a couple. It's exhausting them and has long pushed them over their limits and they have developed a frustrating routine of falling into bed, tangled, heavy as stones, and going to sleep right away, too tired to even speak. They share their morning shower, wordlessly and even Marc sometimes just forgets about breakfast. It's a state of pure stress and more than once, they find themselves, hiding behind some corner, clinging to each other as if holding on to dear life, all muscles trembling or clenching and repeating their mantra... It will be over soon and then it's just the two of us. And Dani is sure that with Marc next to him, he can actually make it through this, bruised for sure, but not defeated.

**November 26th, London**

They’re snuggled up under the sheets already, bodies and limps tangled, Marc’s head on Dani’s, hands laced against the smaller man’s stomach.  
“Dani?” Marc asks tentatively, heart beating nervously in his chest.  
“Huh?” Dani’s voice sounds distant and tired, no wonder after another day in promotion hell.  
Marc coughs and clears his throat. “I'm still living in Switzerland, right?”  
He feels Dani squeeze his hands, tight enough to break his fingers and Dani’s voice is no longer tired, instead full of joy and excitement. “Wow, I thought you'd never asked. Yeah, sure you are!”  
“When this odyssey is over... which I think should be next weekend, could you help me pack my stuff?”  
“Yes!” Dani almost screams, disentangling from Marc to face him, propped up on an elbow and eyes curious.  
Marc smiles, a hand playing with Dani’s hair, eyes on Dani’s face, marveling it in the light of the night lamp. “Good.”  
“Why?” Dani scrutinizes him now, squinting his eyes slightly.  
“First, because I want to. I have to. I finally want to move in properly, that's about overdue. And I've been waiting for a reason to bring it up, to gather my courage to ask like forever and now I have one, because Alex asked me if that could be their nursery.”  
“Really? They'll turn it into a nursery?” The excitement is back in Dani’s voice, making Marc’s smile grow broader by the second.  
“If you're up to it, we can help with the renovation after packing? I’m sure Alex would appreciate it. He’s not that much of an expert with that kind of stuff.”  
“Sure! That's just adorable! We have to bring gifts!” Dani stops, blushing a bit, probably realizing he’s just overdoing it a bit and Marc has to suppress a laugh.  
“I know and we will.” Marc presses a kiss to Dani’s forehead, smiling broadly. _You'll make a wonderful dad one day_

**November 29th, Cervera**

”Is that the last box?”  
“Yes.” Marc leans sits down on the doorstep, panting slightly.  
“Thank God. How could you have so much stuff in that little room?” Alex wipes his face with the arm of his sweater.  
Marc shrugs. “I have no idea where half of that even came from. Or which law of physics I broke to manage cramming it all inside that tiny room.”  
There’s a small break, both of them catching their breath, lost in thoughts, eyes wandering over the hazy sky.  
“So…” Alex is leaning against the van, arms crossed, eyeing his older brother. “What are you up to next?”  
“A few days in Switzerland and then heading to Barcelona, Dani has surgery coming up. And then it’s a couple of promo things and then, finally, Switzerland for a longer while.” Marc runs a hand through his hair and adds, “And we thought about spending Christmas at Vale’s.”  
“Christmas at Vale’s?” Alex raises an eyebrow, unsure how to feel about that. “Yes, time with the surrogate family. Jorge and Clara are coming, too. Don’t you want to come along?”  
“What about mom and dad?”  
“They’ll be happy when we just come here in January then and that way, they’d finally have an empty house. They’ve been crowded here with us and our families for too long, don’t you think?”  
There is another pause, silence feeling tense around them and both of them starting to shiver in their sweaty clothes.  
Alex breaks the silence after a while, mumbling a quiet, “I don’t know about that.”  
“Why?” It’s Marc’s turn to raise his eyebrows.  
“Because you all KNOW.” Alex cringes and turns pink. “And I feel constantly ashamed around you. Like a complete idiot.”  
“Oh.” Marc rummages his pockets for cigarettes and is slightly surprised when Alex takes one as well, lighting both of theirs. Seeing his little brother smoking, all grown up, still feels weird. Just as weird as the thought that incredibly soon, that young guy will be a dad, making Marc an uncle.  
“Well,” after another moment of silence, Marc continues. “Well, it’s true that we know. But we don’t judge. And I’m sorry because I did that, before. When we fought. But it’s wrong, I shouldn’t have. You’re my brother and even if you make decisions I totally do not approve of, I should be there for you. And I’m proud of you for winning that title, don’t think I told you before, but I am sure as hell proud. And I hope you’ll miss me around here. Because having you next to me, I’ll sure be missing that.”  
Alex just throws himself around Marc’s neck, their first proper, sober embrace in a while and when he lets go and their facing each other again, they’re both secretly wiping a tear from their eyes.  
“I don’t know if I’ll miss you stealing my food,” Alex chuckles at Marc’s pout, “but I’ll definitely miss having the best big brother and advisor right next to me, too.”

**November 30th, On the road**

Dani and Marc leave for Switzerland early on Sunday morning, the world outside still dark and their goodbyes teary, especially Roser reacting emotional to the official bird-leaves-nest ceremony. But Marc saw his dad wipe away a stray tear as well and he feels fragile himself for a while, wordlessly driving them through the rest of the night. They’d helped with painting the room until late, spend another night asleep as rocks and Marc now chuckles at the sight of a still exhausted Dani dozing off next to him, shrieking up when he notices, only to doze away right back.  
“Want to stop there?” Dani points at a sight for La Jonquera and Marc’s head jerks around, surprised by the older man being awake and turning deep red at the memory.  
He shakes his head and wills his voice to drop a couple of octaves, “No, actually, I’d rather get back to OUR place as quick as possible and then have my wicked way with you on OUR bed. And OUR kitchen counter. And in OUR shower.”  
He gives Dani a dirty smirk, satisfied when the other man is now turning equally red, memories certainly flooding his head right now.

_I know there’s no need for me to panic_  
 _Cause I’ll find him, I’ll find him next to me_


	77. Take My Breath Away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥   
> Procrastination FTW. ;)

_Watching every motion_   
_In my foolish lover's game_   
_On this endless ocean_   
_Finally lovers know no shame_

It's a long drive, some terribly exhausting unloading, Marc having to do a lot of it himself and Dani growing more and more desperate because of his lacking strength. They bicker, they fight, they yell, they grumble - and then they end up staring into the Van and finding it completely empty. Dani freezes mid-movement, hand against the door, head tilted. It takes a moment before he realizes that Marc is mirroring him, eyes locked on the empty space and, surprised to find his own voice hoarse and his eyes suddenly watery, he mumbles, “We’re done. We’re actually done.”

In slow motion, he sees Marc’s head turn, face in disbelief and the younger rider nods and swallows, before he replies, “Yes, we are.” 

And he sounds as incredulous and overrun with nervousness as Dani feels. 

_We made it. Well, you did most of the work but anyway. You’ve moved._ They each close one of the doors, smiling at each other tentatively and once there’s the plonk of the actual closing, they fall into each other arms. Dani doesn’t care about sweatiness or public decency, he locks eyes with Marc and is falling into a state of complete lust and desire, his only coherent thought being that he must have Marc now. Their kisses are violent, painful, blood lingering, groaning included and greedy hands pull on shirts, rub over sticky skin. They only break away when a passing car honks, both blushing immediately but still smiling at each other. And Dani licks his lower lip, knowing about the effect of the simple gesture on Marc, who grabs his hand roughly in response, impatiently pulling him towards the door.

“Nah, stop!” Dani shakes his head, breathless, stopping a couple of steps away from the entrance of his, no, their house. Marc’s head jerks around, eyes puzzled and Dani explains, “I have to carry you inside, don’t I?” He tries a dirty smirk and sees Marc thinking, wondering, trying to figure if and how Dani wants to do this. 

“I might be injured, but I haven’t lost it completely,” Dani hisses, approaching Marc like a lion stalking his prey and, holding his breath, lifts the squeaking young man, who is considerably leaner than he is himself, over his shoulder like a bag of coals, holding his waist tightly. It’s heavier than he expected and he has to bite his lips suppressing a moan of exhaustion, but he manages to get him inside, kicking the door shut behind them and stumbling up the staircase. All the way, Marc switches between cursing, chuckling and squeaking over his shoulder. 

Dani is relieved and proud when he has made it to the bedroom, finally, dropping Marc unceremoniously and face first to the mattress. They young rider gathers himself slowly, Dani standing next to the bed, gasping for air, grinning and studying each of Marc’s moves. Marc, certainly purposefully, turns around to kneel on the bed in the most seductive way possible, eyes dark, almost black with desire, face still slightly sweaty, damp black V-neck clinging to his chest, now taking his opportunity to lick his lips and running his fingers through his ruffled hair. Dani is rock hard just from the look of it and if Marc keeps going, he thinks he’ll probably come from watching, his erection already pressing against his jeans painfully.

From the bed, he hears a low growl. “Seeing you’re so full of strength, why don’t you come and have your wicked way with me?”

With a twitch, Dani’s hips jerk forward at the mere words. He stares at Marc, gazes locked, both of them with lips parted, still gasping for air, undressing each other in their heads and Dani stares and stares, fascination, obsession, craving and longing growing to agonizing extents. Suddenly, he has images and sounds in his head, slightly scary but scorching hot at the same time and, his lips twitching into a devilish grin, he nods slightly and crawls to join Marc on the bed, coming to sit on his heels right in front of the younger rider, leaning up for a deep, wet, languid kiss. His hand moves under Marc’s shirt, running over Marc’s spine, tracing it with his fingers, scraping lines with his nails, feeling the other lean closer and closer. 

Dani feels Marc’s hands in his neck, melts into the touch and then has another flash of images in his head that make him go wild and desperate. With unprecedented eagerness, he rips Marc’s shirt off, breaking their kiss in the course, finding Marc’s eyes on him, black with lust. Keeping the shirt in his hand, he moves his mouth to Marc’s ear, nibbling the earlobe briefly and eliciting a soft hum, before he whispers, softly but with a lot of determination, “Take your hands behind your back.” 

He sees the flicker of confusion and then surprise run over Marc’s face, quickly replaced by fascinated desire and the younger rider follows the command, eyes holding Dani’s gaze through it. It’s incredible how skilled you get at doing things with only one hand, Dani thinks to himself, while he leans against Marc’s chest, lips on Dani’s neck and wraps the shirt around Marc’s wrists, fidgeting around until he manages to pull it through one of the sleeves and that way, creating a surprisingly stable knot. Sure, if Marc really wanted to, he could get his hands out, but Dani doubts he wants to. After those last looks they exchanged, Marc’s eyes completely black, he doesn’t think the younger rider has any objections regarding the plan.

He keeps sucking on Marc’s neck, sure to be causing a bruise, hearing Marc moan and feeling the bulge in Marc’s jeans grow against his lap. Between the groaning and gasping, he hears Marc’s hoarse voice, “Never expected you to be into that.”

“I love to surprise,” Dani presses out between the devouring kisses he plants on Marc’s naked torso, leaving bite marks, traces of saliva and bruises on his way. _God, you taste so good and you always smell so perfectly, even after sweating just so much this afternoon you’re still so perfect and I am so hopelessly lost to you that it should be scary and it’s even scarier that it’s actually not._

With a single nail, Dani scrapes another line from Marc’s neck down his spine, stopping with his finger under the waistband of the younger rider’s jeans, the closeness to _that_ spot making the other squirm against Dani’s chest. 

With a mastery that only comes with experience, Dani frees Marc from his pants and underwear, Marc moaning loudly when the smaller rider opens the button and zipper with his teeth, brushing over his strained cock. Once the offending clothing is scattered on the floor, Dani leans back to marvel his work, eyes wandering up and down Marc’s body, drinking in the stunning image, revelling in the way the young man is squirming under his look. He gently pushes him, making his back fall into the heap of pillows that are leaning against the headboard.

”Look at me,” he growls, shuffling back on the bed a little and locking hungry eyes with Marc again. Throwing the younger man a daring look, Dani strips himself from his shirts, deliberately slow, teasingly slow, not failing to notice how Marc is biting his lower lip now, breath hitching, cock leaking precome between his spread legs. It’s an addictive form of attention, a pleasurable way of feeling desired and it makes Dani even harder. Behind him, the shirt slowly hits the ground and he jerks his hips forward while he – again, very slowly – unbuckles his belt, freeing himself from his clothes centimetre by centimetre, feeling Marc’s eyes on his hands and staring at the way Marc’s torso trembles under his irregular breathing.

_Watching I keep waiting_   
_Still anticipating love_

”Look what you’re doing to me,” Dani whispers softly, dropping his jeans and boxers to the floor and arching his back a little, making the obvious even more noticeable. He can hear Marc’s breathing hitch. The old Dani, the one before Marc turned his life upside down, would never have done anything like this, he thinks briefly and he’s more than happy that there’s a new Dani now, a braver Dani, stronger Dani, more confident Dani, who can take what he wants at least sometimes. With his eyes scrutinizing Marc’s face, keeping a close watch on his expressions, Dani’s fingers wrap around his own cock now, smearing the precome over the tip and circling it, releasing a quiet, low moan at the sensation.

”Oh God, Dani.” Marc is writhing in his restraints now, cock twitching, teeth biting back down on his lips, eyes fluttering nervously.

And Dani goes for another evil grin, stroking himself ever so slowly, delicious and provocative moans falling from his lips. “It’s all because of you, Marc. You’re doing this to me. You and the way you smile, the way you move, the way you look at me, the way you talk to me. Your soft skin, your perfect smell, your irresistible smile.” Dani has to pause, catch his breath, feeling too close and biting his lip, noticing Marc’s heavy breathing and squirming. Their eyes lock and the mix of affection and sheer lust in Marc’s face is overwhelming. _I have no idea what I did to deserve this, but I am so thankful you’re craving ME of all people._

Letting go of himself, afraid to end this sooner than he intended to otherwise, Dani bends down, propped up on one hand, mouth on Marc’s chest, tongue making its way down. The younger rider is writhing and squirming, moaning and bucking his hips. 

“Dani, dammit. Now.” It’s a command pressed out between some gasps and groans and it goes straight to Dani’s groin, making him twitch eagerly. _Not yet._ He wills himself to take this slow, slower, agonizingly slow and darts his tongue out again, licking a line along Marc’s cock, lips pressing a soft kiss to his tip, tasting the drops of precome. Immediately, Marc’s hips buck up and a string of swears falls from the younger rider’s lips, while Dani leans back and teasingly licks his lips. 

“Want to taste yourself?” He asks, voice low and Marc nods, eyes resting on Dani’s as if he was hypnotized.

Dani kisses his tip again, picking up some of the white liquid with his lips and then leans up, kissing Marc messily. Their chests are rubbing against each other now and so are their cocks, the feeling sending electric shocks through Dani’s body and making him moan into their kiss.

“Fuck. Me. Now.” Marc more breathes than speaks the words, chest heaving violently against Dani’s. 

Shaking his head, Dani moves back, sitting across Marc again, dirty smirk on his face and still revelling in the younger man’s look of desperate craving, while he returns to stroke himself, eyes closed now, back arched, releasing soft moans and fucking his own palm at a slow but steady rhythm. His eyes flutter, sometimes he manages to look at Marc, sometimes they are squeezed shut. His head falls back and his thrusts get quicker, across from him Marc wincing, squirming, pleading and panting and Marc’s neediness drives Dani up the wall, pushes his mind into a state of pure ecstasy and makes him please himself quicker and quicker. 

”Dani. Fuck.” Through squinting eyes, he sees Marc’s hips jerk up uncontrollably and together with his grip tightening around his cock, it’s enough to make him feel the familiar tension in his muscles, the impending explosion palpable, before he comes over his own hands, releasing a low groan and hearing Marc mutter a weak, breathless “Dani. Oh my God.”

The knowledge that Marc is still there, splayed out for him, needy as ever, only allows Dani to float on his cloud of peace briefly, before he opens his eyes again, finding Marc staring at him like a wild animal on a leash, desperate and ready to attack any second. Trembling slightly, he shuffles closer to the younger man, wiping his hands on the sheets on his way and then running it through Marc’s hair, gripping the younger man’s head tightly and devouring him with another kiss, before his tongue makes its way down the toned torso once again.

He loves the way Marc tastes, a bit salty from the sweat, a bit like his soap and mostly like Marc, unique and perfect. He props himself up on his hand again, mouth slowly reaching Marc’s lap, the younger man’s hips bucking up and his cock twitching in anticipation. Dani drags things again, determined to master the mix of agony, despair and relief, wanting to re-invent the term blissful torture. His lips move around Marc’s cock ever so slowly, tongue moving, but always a bit too softly, sucking, but never quite hard enough, enjoying the dirty words and swears spilling from Marc’s mouth along with the frantic and desperate movements of the young rider’s hips.

Only when Marc’s squirming and whimpering turns absolutely urgent, breathless, almost sounding like an attacked dog now, Dani decides to give in, speeding up his rhythm, tongue pressing harder now, cheeks hollowing to suck stronger. Still writhing and bucking under his touch, Marc tenses briefly, pressing out a bare “close” before he comes down Dani’s throat with a loud growl. Dani swallows without hesitation, not even choking and sits back up, Marc’s head dropping to his shoulder, the younger rider panting desperately.

Hot breath burns on Dani’s skin and Marc’s voice is muffled by Dani’s chest, Marc’s words vibrating through him and Marc’s body still shaky, when the young rider speaks breathlessly now. “Dammit. You’re evil.”

_Turning and returning_   
_To some secret place to find_   
_Watching in slow motion_   
_As you turn to me and say_   
_My love_   
_Take my breath away_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~~No, I totally didn't try if that is even possible with one hand. *shakes head in denial*~~


	78. Quiero Mas

They stay where they are, Dani on his knees between Marc’s legs, Marc’s head collapsed against Dani’s chest and both of them trying to catch their breath. Marc feels Dani’s fingers trace little circles on his forearms, wrists still tied. _Wow. Just wow. This is one of the things I didn’t know I needed until I got them._ He inhales, drinks in Dani’s smell, drowning in the closeness. 

And he should be tired, worn out, dying to take a shower, sleep or eat, but he’s so lost in Dani right now that he doesn’t want to move. Never again. Behind his back, Dani’s fingers free him from the restraints. _I have no idea how you even did that, Houdini._ His arms are a bit numb and he stretches them briefly only to wrap them tightly around Dani afterwards. He is pressing them flush against each other and with a soft moan, he buries his head in the nape of Dani’s neck, sucking on his throat, a surprised hum coming from Dani’s mouth and Dani’s fingers clenching in his shoulder. 

He shuffles around a little until he’s sitting on Dani’s lap, his hips rolling slightly and needy noises falling from the smaller rider’s lips, grip on Marc’s shoulder tightening. With his hands in Dani’s neck, he pulls the other in for a kiss, Dani’s lips parting obediently, letting his tongue through, responding eagerly. Their cocks are rubbing against each other now. _And damned, it’s happening again._

From the corner of his eyes, Marc catches a glimpse out of the windows, noticing that It’s almost completely dark outside again and he reaches for the night lamp, because he suddenly realizes it’s become gloomy inside as well and he really wants to see Dani right now. It’s all so new, so fresh, so precious and he has to see Dani to be able to believe that it’s real and not a dream. _And this is OUR bed now and a month ago I thought I had lost you._

They’re breaking their kiss for air, both staring at each other incredulously for an instant, eyes already black with lust and a shiver runs down Marc’s spine when Dani’s hips buck up, their building erections loving the friction. “Seriously,” Dani growls into his ear. “What are you doing to me? I can’t be ready to go again, I shouldn’t be acting like a horny teenager.” 

Marc runs his fingers through Dani’s hair, pulling Dani’s head back and smirking at the older rider. “This,” one of his hands reaches between them, finger tracing along Dani’s now fully erect cock, “says you’re more than ready.” Dani releases a disappointed whimper when Marc withdraws his fingers, both hands cupping the smaller man’s face again now. Their gazes lock intensely once again. Marc leans forward, lips touching Dani’s ear while he speaks, feeling the other rider shudder against him. “Fuck me, Dani!”

He lets out a surprised yelp when Dani bites down on his neck in response, hand now on the small of his back, moving down. The yelp transforms into a pleading whimper when Marc feels Dani’s finger pressing against his hole now, his own fingers searching for hold on Dani’s hips, digging into the flesh sharply and probably leaving bruises, possibly drawing blood. 

“Should I really do that?” Dani’s voice is low, hoarse, sexy, sending stings through Marc’s guts, finger tentatively breaching Marc’s muscles and the younger rider swallows hard and frantically nods against Dani’s shoulder. “Ask nicely.” The dangerous hiss makes Marc press back against Dani’s touch desperately but Dani just lets out a brief chuckle and pulls his hand away, holding up Marc’s chin now with one finger and staring at him, eyes black with lust. “Ask. Me. Nicely.”

_You are doing strange things to me._ Marc squirms under Dani’s scrutinizing eyes and he feels his cheeks blush. “Please, fuck me, Dani. Fuck me hard.” It comes out pathetic, a bit too high-pitched, but Marc feels so needy right now that he hardly cares, especially when Dani’s hand returns, finger running through his cleft, teasing his hole. 

Marc trembles under Dani’s touch, biting down on his lip until he tastes blood and making more needy, unmanly noises, feeling and hearing Dani chuckle softly against his neck before Dani bites down, apparently determined to leave a bruise that will last for some days. Marc’s hands dig deeper into the flesh of the smaller man’s hips again, holding him in place, his own hips rolling, searching for friction.

Dani reaches for the drawer, both of them left panting, both of them covered in sweat and Marc devours Dani’s face with his eyes, marveling the focus, while the smaller man lubes up his fingers, eyes still or again black with desire, cheeks flushed, hair disheveled, disobedient streaks clinging to the damp forehead. “Ready?” Another growl, another sting right to Marc’s lap and he nods, leaning forward onto his knees, lifting his ass and letting his head rest against Dani’s shoulder. 

He shudders at the sensation, the cool lube against his hot entrance and he wills himself to relax for Dani, letting him in slowly and moaning against Dani’s sticky skin, mind blank from the divergence between burn and pleasure and craving. He presses down on Dani’s finger, urging him to move and presses out a breathless, “More, Dani, please.” 

This time, Dani doesn’t make him beg for more and just adds fingers, pushing into him and scissoring him roughly, movements and growls impatient. “Now.” Marc hisses, hands in Dani’s hair. The smaller rider lines them up and Marc sits down on him, his cock against Dani’s stomach, their chests flush against each other, creating delicious friction.

”You’ll be doing the work,” Dani whispers against his ear as they’re sitting motionless, Dani buried inside him completely, Marc still breathing heavily to accommodate to the stretch and the burn. After a moment, Marc moves, reveling in the wanton noises coming from Dani now, fidgeting around to create the perfect angle and when he finds it, fireworks exploding in his head, he picks up a relentless rhythm, his own hands still clawing at Dani’s shoulder and Dani’s fingers determined to pull out his hair, pain not important at any point. He knows he would have the chance to take this slow, to repay Dani some of that agonizing teasing from before, but Marc doesn’t have the patience or the strength anymore and just moves, obsessively, frantically, searching for relief from the pressure that’s building up inside of him. 

They come simultaneously and Marc feels the waves of happiness crash over him, sparks and stars in front of his eyes and this time, they collapse to the mattress unceremoniously. He winces briefly at the now unfamiliar emptiness but then they end up snuggled up against each other closely, Dani covering them with some sheets and their panting filling the room, suddenly much quieter when seconds before a myriad of swears and growls had filled the air.

Afterwards, for Marc, everything is under a haze, his mind staying on that comfortable cloud where he feels safe and sheltered and more than satisfied. They make it to the shower, legs trembling from exhaustion, warm water running over them while they stand in a motionless embrace, eyes shut, breath still heavy. Dani dries him and it feels surreal, comforting, as if it’s everything he has ever needed. And as he stands in the bathroom, getting dressed in jeans and a hoodie, eyes on Dani doing the same, Marc knows that he’s home, that he is in the one place where he should be. There’s no sudden reason, no awakening, not the one factor he could put his finger on. The feeling is just there.

The hazy, cloudy feeling of perfections is still there when Dani leads him to the kitchen, Marc overwhelmed of the sudden domesticity, the feeling of being cared for, the comfort of seeing Dani cook, or warm up the food his mother made them take along… the emotions mixing with the alcohol from the wine that he’s drinking now on a mostly empty stomach. Marc’s head is spinning slightly, but in a pleasant way. And Marc is reveling in the complete satisfaction, that makes him feel like he’s burning from the inside. 

They don’t speak through the cooking, just exchanging shy smiles, brief looks, tiny touches that feel as if they’re burning Marc’s skin. And then, they eat and afterwards, Marc feels full and heavy as a stone, but still completely content and, with their hands laced between them, Dani’s head against Marc’s arm, they stumble out on the small terrace, cuddled up under Dani’s leather jacket, sharing a cigarette. There’s a full moon, crisp air, their breath coming out in puffy white clouds and still, everything is perfection. Hazy, profound, content perfection and Marc kisses Dani’s cheek, the older man turning his head so that their eyes meet and the final piece falls into place when they simultaneously reach for each other’s hand again, Dani’s finger rubbing over the empty spot on Marc’s finger. They don’t even need words. Dani just raises a questioning eyebrow and of course Marc knows what he means and he nods, just once, slowly, smiling broadly. _Yes, I do._

_No puedo detener esta obsesion_


	79. Driving "Home" For Christmas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After a lot of basically PWP, we're doing time warp now ;)
> 
> Thank you as always! ♥

“Okay, so are we all set up?” Vale runs his fingers through his hair and shoots Nicky a nervous look. Because Nicky will know, he always does, he is the sensible of the two of them – unless alcohol is involved. Now, the American turns to him, biggest smile ever on his face and nods, pulling him in for an embrace.  
“Don’t worry, everything’s prepared. Signora Romeo has prepared the guest rooms and we have enough food to feed an entire army. Which we might have to, considering Marc is one of out visitors.”  
Vale chuckles against Nicky’s temple and takes a deep breath. “Okay. So they can get here then. Why are you laughing?”  
“Because you’re adorable when you’re so excited, still like a kid.”  
Vale pouts and he wishes he could retort, but Nicky is too accurately right here. The Italian’s eyes wander through the room, seeing the tree, the ornaments, the Playstation set up… _I am a kid. At heart at least. Well, we all have to find a way to keep going I suppose._  
“Aw, you know I love you for that.” Nicky’s lips press against his and Vale melts, breaking away a moment later, thoughts running havoc in his head again.  
“We know Marc and Dani are okay, right?”  
“Vale, seriously, there’s an invitation to their wedding on our fridge. Yes, we do.”  
“And Jorge and Clara are always adorable.”  
“They are always tooth-rottingly sweet as Marc put it, yes.”  
“And Alex and Marta?” _They’re really the ones who worry me most._  
“Do you really think they’d even have agreed to come here together if they weren’t okay?”  
Vale sighs and Nicky laughs at him openly now, leading him to bite down on the American’s neck and at the same time, roughly tickling him and enjoying the panicky squeals. _Tooth-rottingly sweet… huh? Could be us._

*******

“Remind me why we have to drive?” Dani stares at Marc, hands against his hips.  
Marc sighs exasperatedly. “Because Marta cannot fly.”  
“And it’s sensible that they spend a night here and drive with us because?”  
Another sigh. “My mother thinks doing it all by himself would be too much for Alex.”  
“Right.” Dani groans, flopping back on the couch. “You think I could take a turn?”  
“Erm, no?! I know you can move the hand, but I also know you’re not fully feeling with your fingers for another four or five months and also, you haven’t been driving forever and finally, I do not want to encounter the wrath of my mother if I let you drive and anything happens to her most precious grandchild.”  
“Any clues regarding the name of the prince?” Dani decides to change the topic, knowing that he won’t have a say against a potential fallout with Roser.  
Marc lets himself fall down on the couch next to Dani. “Nope. But I take it they picked. They just refuse to even give the slightest hint.”  
“Well, as long as it’s not Jorge…” Dani grins devilshly.  
Marc snorts and nudges Dani. “Don’t you dare taking this there.”  
“Okay… taking things somewhere else, have you packed?”  
“No.”  
“Marc!”  
“We’re only leaving tomorrow.” Marc is pouting and it takes Dani a lot of self-restraint not to kiss those lips right now.  
“Yeah, but we do want to get away early and not wait for you to decide how many pairs of jeans you need to take.”  
“I’m not that bad.” _Please stop the pouting, Marc._  
“Yes you are.” Dani leans over and kisses the younger rider. _Screw self restraint._

*******

Alex drives up the road, passing the signs for the French boarder and his eyes rest on Marta who has cuddled up in passenger seat and fallen sound asleep. The woman who took him back despite the unmentionable. It’s still amazing him, a miracle. Just like the entire situation. He glances at the undeniable baby bump. But they’d been to a birth preparation workshop together and she was by far the most beautiful woman there. And one of the few who hadn’t gained weight but only grown a bump. If you see her from behind, she doesn’t even look pregnant. And he knows she feels bad about herself and he’s spend so much time trying to cheer her up and never quite made it. In his despair, he’d asked his father for advice – after all, the brave man had been through it twice – but besides “hide somewhere from her temper”, his dad didn’t have a solution on offer. The first thing she had exclaimed when Dani & Marc announced the date had been a beaming, “Phew, I should look okay by then.” It’s breaking Alex’s heart when he sees her, eyeing herself in the mirror full of insecurity. That’s just not how it’s supposed to be. She’s so much more than just okay, simply gorgeous and beautiful. Smiling, he brushes over her belly, amazed at the little kick that greets him. “Well, hello there. Glad you’re up. Mommy is not. I think you’re tiring her a little. Well, maybe a lot. And I suppose, you’re not planning on giving that up anytime soon, are you?” At the sound of a soft chuckle, Alex jerks his head towards Marta, blushing deep red.  
“You’re talking to him. That’s so cute.” Marta is beaming.  
“Don’t make fun of me.”  
“I’m not. It’s cute. And you’re right, He is tiring me. But in the best possible way,” she emphasizes, her hand pressing against the bump, smiling down at it.  
After a while, she clears her throat, asking, “Have you told Marc about the name?”  
Alex shakes his head. “No, I think it should be a surprise.”  
“Are you sure he’ll be okay with it?”  
Alex nods. “Don’t worry, he’ll love it.”

*******

Clara snuggles up against Jorge, back against his chest, his arms around her waist.  
“Are you looking forward to seeing them again?” She presses her hands on his fingers, thumb rubbing little circles.  
“Definitely,” Jorge says, response coming immediately, “we haven’t met properly for a month. The few occasions where we ran into each other were just way too brief.”  
“So… you’re talking about all of them?”  
“Yeah, sure. Why?”  
“Because Jorge Lorenzo just admitted that he is looking forward to spending his vacation with Marc Marquez, Dani Pedrosa and Valentino Rossi. At Rossi’s ranch. I’d have a worriless life ahead if sold that news to the press.”  
“You’d have a short life ahead because I would have to kill you, young lady.” Jorge bites down on her neck, making her yelp.  
After a while, she raises her voice again. “It’s the first time you officially meet Marc as an engaged man… will it be weird?”  
“Huh?”  
“Well, you two have been together.”  
“No, we haven’t. That wasn’t a relationship.”  
“It wasn’t casual fucking either.”  
“No, it wasn’t. It was something special and owed to the circumstances. Do you feel weird around him?”  
Clara shakes her head. “No, never. He is so obviously head over heels with Dani that I never saw him as opponent. And he can be quite funny to have around.”  
“Even I cannot deny that.”  
“I’m glad Alex and Marta are coming. I feel more comfortable knowing I won’t be the only woman there.”  
“Aww, would we have made you nervous?”  
“Possibly. But I’m also just happy for them. They are a sweet couple, even if Alex has acted like a bastard.”  
“Well, he’s 18.”  
“I know. And he’s damned lucky that Marta took that into consideration.”  
“She’s only 19.”  
“I know, but she doesn’t behave like a teenager anymore.”  
“That much is true. Well, they’ll be there and that will be nice.”  
“Imagine, a year from now, if we repeat this, their kid will be walking up to us.”  
“I know, incredibly. And the thought alone makes me jealous.”  
“Really?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Does that mean –“ Clare turns around swiftly, facing Jorge, who smiles at her and cups her face.  
“Yes, it means that once we have found a place to settle and arranged a wedding, I would love to have kids.”  
Before her mind even fully processed the words, Carla is clinging to Jorge, lips against each other and both moaning happily into their kiss.

_It's gonna take some time_   
_But I'll get there_


	80. Navidad En El Country

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥
> 
> A bit late, but it turned out pretty long as a remuneration ;)

_Que lindo es que estemos en paz_

They arrive almost simultaneously on the afternoon the 24th, invading the ranch with loud steps, tons of baggage, laughter, banter and lots of hugging and kissing. Joy is quite an understatement for Vale’s feeling when he watches them, feeling fatherly towards quite some of the younger riders and the girls. The way they’ve come has been incredible and he has to remind himself that their last gathering has only been a few months ago. After all that’s happened, the months certainly feel like years.  
“Hey, are you happy now?” Nicky has evaded the cheery group hugs and joined him in leaning against the wall, watching Marc and Alex bicker about each other’s driving skills with a happily-looking Marta feigning annoyance and Dani, whose eyes are glued to Marc and full of affection. Amused Clara and Jorge are following the debate, Jorge’s arm around her waist.  
Instead of an answer, Vale just nods and pulls the American in for a kiss.  
“Guys, get a room!” They break apart, lips curling into smiles, staring at the group and the brothers whose simultaneous command had separated them. _They’re here. Finally._

The easy domesticity of their last stay together is back immediately, as if they’d never been away. Nicky, Clara, Marta and Dani cook agree on fixing dinner, each of them seemingly beating the others with tricks and tips. Alex and Jorge sit at the huge wooden table and watch their ladies, eyes full of affection. Grinning at the sight, the two men holding on to their bottles of beer, affectionate looks on their significant others, Vale puts an arm around Marc’s shoulder and drags him out to the terrace, cigarettes and bottle of red in hand.

They flop down into some armchairs wordlessly, Marc leaning forward for Vale to light his cigarette. It’s a cool night, but not overly cold and they sit in silence for a moment, both of them staring into the starry sky for a while.

Vale clears his throat after a while, curiosity winning the better of him. “So, are you going to announce the engagement officially?” 

”We haven’t decided yet.” Marc blows away a line of smoke and Vale has no problem to understand what first Jorge and then Dani found in the face of the young man, childish enthusiasm and mental strength blending into something gorgeous. “Probably not though, we don’t want paparazzi for the wedding and if we keep it quiet we can maybe avoid that for the most part.”

“Sounds reasonable.” Vale nods. “And why in Cervera? I thought you’re living at Dani’s?”

”We’re living at ours,” Marc corrects with a grin that shows that he is not seriously affected. “And it’s because Switzerland doesn’t have gay marriage.”

”They don’t?” Vale raises an eyebrow and realizes that he knows shamefully little about these things, despite being affected himself.

”No, actually not. I was surprised to find out, too. But they acknowledge it if we get married somewhere else, so…” Marc shrugs. “And when will get the invitations for your guys’ big day?”

 _And that’s the million dollar question, because neither of us proposed officially._ Vale kicks his cigarette away and shrugs now as well. “I don’t think we’ll start that before Nicky’s retirement is official. So you’ve got some time to get a decent outfit.”

*******

“So, how are you feeling?” Jorge shoots Alex a curious look.  
The younger rider shrugs, blushing slightly. “I don’t know. It’s awkward.”  
“Awkward?” Jorge raises an eyebrow.  
“I mean,” Alex coughs, “you all know about Alvaro and what happened and I don’t know… I mean, nobody said anything, but it’s still weird.”  
Jorge cringes, realizing the misunderstanding. “Oh. Okay. But that’s not our business. If Marta forgives you, what do we have to mess around. And actually, that’s not what I meant.”  
Alex looks puzzled now.  
“Well, I meant, like, you’re becoming a father. And it’s going to happen pretty soon… how do you feel about that?”  
Relief washes over Alex’s face now. “Oh, it’s really great. A true miracle. I know it’s soon and unplanned and everything, but now he’s there and it’s just amazing…” Alex trails off, telling him stories about doctor’s visits, mood swings and all the things the baby does already and Jorge just grins, finding the babbling young man simply adorable. And in the very back of his head, he notices a tiny sting of jealousy at the things Alex is getting to experience already.

*******

Dinner is comfortable, enjoyable and just as if the past months had never happened. Dani even cuts his own steak, receiving a friendly nudge from Marc. Alex and Marta giggle over the baby’s kicking and a curious and visibly blushed and nervous Jorge tries, Clara openly melting at the sight, tiny drops of tears in her eyes included. And Vale slides his hands into Nicky’s, fingers laced on the table, head against the American’s shoulder and realizes just how much they’ve been missing this for years and years that were spent hiding. It’s a bit painful to realize that, probably, none of the secrecy would have been needed. Their coming out hasn’t had much effect yet. Some hate, but they’ve gotten that for other things before, too. It’s cut Nicky’s ties with his families, but they’d been ridiculously thin before. And in exchange, they now had the most beautiful surrogate family he could wish for. Although, if anyone had ever told he’d call Jorge Lorenzo family, he certainly would have thought they were insane.  
A lot of wine, a noisy collective move to the terrace and many cigarettes later, they make it to their respective rooms and reactions to his obligatory “Don’t worry, we’ve got thick walls” vary from blushing to fits of giggles.

*******

_Oh, it's so hot, and I need some air._  
 _And boy, don't stop 'cause I'm halfway there_

“So, we’re by ourselves.” Clara’s arms wrap around his neck and he feels her lips against his ear, shivers running down his spine when she continues, “And Vale mentioned that the walls are rather thick.”  
Her tongue brushes over the sweet spot behind his ear and Jorge groans, hands around her waist, pulling her closer, hips searching for friction. 

“So you’re worried about those walls?” He growls, while her hands run through his hair, lips pulling on his earlobe, more delicious shivers running through his body.

“Not anymore.” Her hips push against his and she has the most devilish grin on her face when she pulls her head back a little to add, “And it doesn’t feel like you have objections? Or would you rather have me stop?” 

At the last part of the sentence, she starts grinding against his laps, on her tiptoes, making sure she hits just the right spot and one of her hands has found its way under the back of his shirt, nails scraping over his back.  
Jorge bites down on her neck and pushes her on the bed, making her squeak slightly and he loses himself in her eyes, almost black with lust, cheeks definitely blushed, lipstick messy and golden curls tousled around her head. _A little bit like a wild cat._

He crawls over her, on the grey sheets of a bed he honestly hasn’t even looked at yet, in a room that he doesn’t know the color of the wall from, eyes only for her. He is pinning her wrists down on the mattress, devouring her mouth and it’s not long before they’re both breaking it, panting for air, gazes intense and clouded with desire.

He strips himself from his shirt and she sits up to follow the example, taking it a bit slower, teasingly, deliberately pausing when she snaps open the bra and then, in slow motion, dropping the clothing on the floor. Her hands are searching for his buttons and, most likely not accidentally, pressing against his bulge on their way.  
He responds by shoving both of his hands under her jeans and panties, knowing from experience that she’s skinny enough and he’s strong enough to tear them off without even opening them. After some fidgeting and shuffling, they end up both naked, her underneath, looking up to him with those hungry eyes, lips parted invitingly and, watching ever little expression on her face, he runs his fingers up her thighs, feeling her shudder, seeing her bite down on her lip the closer he gets.  
His fingers brush her, softly, almost unnoticeably and she is whimpering, eyes pleading with him, hands clenching in his hair.

He smiles at her, trying to pay back that evil grin, repeating the move, her grip tightening. With more force than one would expect from her tiny body, she pulls his head down, picking back up on where they broke the kiss some minutes ago and when they break apart now, her mouths moves to his ear, teasing again, tongue flicking over his skin, hot breath burning him. 

Jorge feels one of her hands move out of his hair, brushing over his sides, reaching between them and a single finger rubs over his tip, making him groan desperately. It’s a battle they’ve fought countless times and he knows it’s a lost cause for him, but he’s willing to take the most pleasant challenge anytime. His finger makes a point of teasingly pushing inside her, just a tiny bit, withdrawing right afterwards again, moving up, finding her clit and he cannot suppress the dirty smirk when she shudders under him, sweetest swears falling from her lips.

She knows him well enough to take revenge, reaching between her own legs, along with his hands, slicking her fingers with a delicious moan and then circling his cock, performing a single, agonizing stroke upwards that makes him growl and arch his back. _The game is officially opened._

*******

_E' l'amore che torna_  
 _In mia e tua sola compagnia!_

Marc steps out of the bathroom, undressed as always, as they’ve long become comfortable with being naked around each other and he crawls under the sheets, propping himself up on his side, eyes staring at Dani determinedly, the smaller rider looking up a bit confused.  
“I KNOW the way you just looked at me when I walked over here,” he growls, a hand running through Dani’s hair, ruffling it slightly.  
Dani blushes adorably and coughs briefly, but then replies with a firm voice, holding Marc’s gaze and raising an eyebrow, “Now do you really?”

Turned on by the low voice and the confident look, Marc moves to straddle Dani, sheets falling back on Dani’s legs and he pins the older man’s wrists to the mattress.  
“Are you sure you want to go there?” Dani looks up at him, eyebrow raised again and instead of an actual response, Marc grinds his hips down, their cocks in contact, demonstrating his point with their quickly growing erections.

Dani hums approvingly and, low voice still intact, growls, “Make me scream then.” 

_Wow._ And Marc’s mind goes blank with arousal. His eyes are holding Dani’s gaze while their lips crash violently, obscene sounds from their teeth gritting and their tongues battling for domination. He’s still holding DanI’s wrists down and rolls his hips teasingly, creating a little but not quite enough friction between them. They’re both moaning desperately into the kiss, taste of blood now undeniable and Dani’s hands are starting to fight back, trying to withdraw. When Marc finally lets go, they find his hips immediately, nails digging in sharply, the feeling that it’s happening on both sides still so new that it is flooding Marc with joy, making him halt and smile into their kiss briefly, glance of understanding flickering through Dani’s eyes.

Then, Dani bucks up his hips and they resume their actions, rough and forceful. Marc’s reaching for the drawer already, pouring lube over his fingers without breaking their kiss and then reaching for Dani’s ass, pressing inside him without hesitation. A soft wince comes from the older rider’s mouth, quickly replaced with a moan when Marc starts moving, going straight for Dani’s sweet spot and reveling in the feeling of the smaller man shuddering and unravelling under him. Marc’s eyes get lost in Dani’s, as always fascinated with the sheer trust he’s seeing in them. He remembers their beginnings, the days when Dani could hardly kiss him without having to throw up and now he’s under him, splayed out like an offering, legs around Marc’s waist pulling him closer, deeper, face unraveling, eyes squeezed shut, loud groans falling from parted lips, sheen of sweat making him look gorgeous. _Simply unbelievable._ And only a year ago, Marc had firmly believed Dani disliked him, found him childish and too aggressive and he’d spent the winter break staring at the few photos of the two of them, fangirling his idol, dreaming of things he thought were beyond dreams. Now, he had more than he would ever have asked for and his fingers dig into Dani’s wrists, ring noticeable in the touch.

Inside of him, tension slowly builds and he speeds up the rhythm, Dani’s hips meeting his thrusts eagerly. He frees one of his hands, taking hold of Dani’s erection, stroking him in rhythm, trying to retain enough focus to move his hand even when his own orgasm washes over him relentlessly, thoughts replaced by images of stars and fireworks and Dani, loud growl echoing through the room, his body shuddering and his arms trembling. On his hand, he feels Dani’s come already, somehow his mind not processing everything at once and he collapses onto the smaller man unceremoniously and panting heavily. When some of his senses return and he pulls out, reaching for tissues, he hears that Dani is still panting and the other winces under the touch of the tissue against his stomach, probably still in that state where just everything is too much. Marc wraps them both under the sheets now, his head on Dani’s chest, Dani’s heartbeat vibrating through his body and feeling as if he’d found paradise already. 

*******

_No, there's nothing that I wouldn't do_  
 _To make you feel my love._

“Alex?” Marta laces their hands between them.

“Mhm.” He sounds sleepy and she knows he’s had a tough day and a difficult night, knows he’s still uncomfortable around all of them, regardless how many times he’s told that everything is okay. She’s almost sorry for asking, but then it’s important to her and she doesn’t want to wait.

“Do you have a problem with me being fat?”

“You’re not fat, you’re pregnant.” The response comes almost immediately.

“Do you have a problem with that?” She’s insisting, she has to know and she’s so nervous right now, that her eyes are glued to the ceiling.

“No. It’s perfect. And I told you. I also told you that you’re beautiful and gorgeous and pretty. And can you please, please, please tell me where this keeps coming from and how to fix it? It’s driving me crazy to see you like that.”

She could cry over the despair in his voice, she really could. Swallowing down a lump in her throat, she replies weakly, “Because you avoid touching me. I mean… since we’re back together… you haven’t even tried-“ She wants to say it but she can’t and she feels the heat in her cheeks and regrets bringing it up.

“What?” Alex voice is in awake-mode now and he is sitting up, propped up on his elbows, she notices from the corner of her eyes and by the way the mattress dips. “That’s what you thought?”

She turns her face away from him, cheeks burning like fire now, nodding almost invisible.  
From behind, he snuggles up against her, holding her gently.  
“That’s so ridiculous, baby, please. I just… I couldn’t initiate anything. I mean. I –“ She can hear him swallow. “I cheated on you. I couldn’t ask for that. I’ve been waiting for you to let me know you're ready.”

Marta turns around, facing him, eyes full of disbelief, weak smile around her lips. “Seriously?”

Alex is just as blushed as she feels and nods. “Seriously.”

And they burst into laughter, foreheads touching, hands laced again and Marta cannot believe how stupid they’ve been acting. _And then we tell Marc and Dani they ought to communicate better. Just great._

When the laughter slowly stops and their eyes meet again, she notices the change in mood, the flicker of lust that has returned to Alex’s eyes and after an intense staring contest, they end up in kiss that’s the most passionate they’ve shared in the past months, leaving both of them panting, lips swollen and covered in saliva. There’s another intense gaze and then her wrists are held down to the mattress and Alex’s mouth moves down on her.

It feels uncomfortable for an instant, she feels self-conscious when he shoves the sheets away, sits down straddling her, but with his arousal now actually palpable against her lap and his eyes still dark with lust, she manages to relax, while he sucks little bruises on her throat and collarbones, making his way down her chest, hint of stubble scratching her skin and he kisses her belly and doesn’t stop. She knows where it is going from here and she’s nervous, because it’s been a while, but she’s also more than needy, hips jerking up slightly already in anticipation. His fingers spread her thighs a bit further now and her hands search for hold in his hair, the soft touch almost unbearable. She’s biting down on her lip, hard enough to draw blood and pulling on his hair relentlessly and then his tongue finds her clit and she’s almost shocked from the desperate squeal that she releases.

She would never have complained about Alex’s qualities as a lover, but today is unprecedented. He has not made such a selfless effort at pleasing her before and if her mind wasn’t so far into oblivion, she would appreciate that even more, but right now her brain is overwhelmed with the sensation of his fingers inside of her and his tongue and lips playing with her most sensitive spot, flicking over it, sucking it, fingers moving along at a perfect pace. Her head has long fallen back into the pillow, moans now falling freely from parted lips, eyes rolling back. And she feels everything build up, tense up, her entire focus on one tiny spot of her body before another little lick pushes her over the edge, almost ripping out his hair and screaming his name, at a noise level that would embarrass her if she could still think.

She’s floating on cloud happy, when Alex’s head appears next to her again, face flushed and smiling broadly and she pulls him in for a weak, sloppy kiss, no objections to tasting herself on him, holding him close against her and reveling in joy.

“Believe me now?” His voice comes out muffled, his mouth still close to her cheek.

“Almost,” she says, smirking at him and the question marks in his eyes disappear as soon as her fingers find his throbbing cock, stroking him gently and eliciting a beautiful groan. _Wow, I missed feeling that desire._ He doesn’t last long under her moves and she is too tired to make an effort at teasing, but when he collapses against her, face off-guard, looking gorgeous, her name on his lips while the hot liquid splatters over her hand, that’s when she knows he’s fine with her look, really fine.

*******

_And I love with urgency_  
 _But not with haste_

Valentino and Nicky are both undressing unceremoniously the second their door falls closed behind their backs, throwing themselves at each other desperately. Nicky buries his head in the nape of Vale’s neck, inhaling the familiar smell that lets him know he’s home and safe, hands running over Vale’s back and lips curling in a smile when the Italian shivers against him. He tilts his head, bringing their mouths together and, against his expectations, the kiss is gentle, tentative even, languid. Movements of tongues are slow, exploring rather than devouring tonight and his hands still their movements, resting on the small of Vale’s back while Vale wraps his arms around his neck, holding their bodies flush against each other. 

They make it to the bed together, very slowly, full body contact all the time, lying down together, Nicky ending up on top. Their mutual arousal is undeniable, but neither of them seems pressured or hurried. For his part, Nicky could stay this way forever, feeling safe, home, sheltered from everything, Vale’s touch and smell surrounding him, holding him, flooding him. The only sounds in the room come from their wet kiss, interrupted by occasional soft panting. On his back, Valentino’s fingers are drawing little lines and patterns and the American is melting, feeling like he’s floating, until a provocative finger finds his cleft, teasingly, making him moan and writhe slightly. 

He opens his eyes, finding Vale staring at him, eyes clouded with desire already and he nods to the unspoken question, pulling his head back a bit, string of saliva still connecting their lips. “I want to feel you, okay?” His voice comes out hoarse and he sees the glint of desire lighting up in Valentino’s eyes, sending a sting straight to his lap.

While Vale is reaching for the little tube, Nicky turns around, face buried in the immaculate white pillows that smell like them, their detergent, their scents. Home is good. The travelling is wearing him out, more and more and a part of him has long started wishing for Vale to quit next year, too, retire with him. Yet, he knows the Italian, knows that retirement, at least at this point, would be like putting a wild bird into a cage and he sighs into the pillow.

The sigh is taken over by a whimper when one of Vale’s hands spreads his cheeks now, a cool finger pressing against his entrance, pushing past the muscles. Nicky moans again, louder now, hands clenching in sheets, back arching when Vale finds the right angle. And Vale does, he always does. His moves are well-aimed, well-dosed, making Nicky fall apart quickly, reducing him to a panting mess and when it’s not one or two but three fingers, curled to make sure they hit his prostate over and over again, rhythm passionate but not too fast, Nicky pleads.

“Now, Vale. Please, more.” His voice is weak, breathless, his thoughts barely coherent enough to form simple words.

The fingers disappear, making him wince and wriggle, eliciting a low chuckle behind him and then he feels Vale bury himself, slower than usual, teasingly and with an incredible amount of self-restraint. Nicky’s breath hitches, his fingers cling to the sheets as if his life depended on it, the burn just about still bearable and then it’s done and he knows he’s taken Vale in completely. The Italian stills now and he feels Valentino bend down, chest against his back now, lips sucking a little bruise into his neck, hands resting on his, that are still holding on to the fabric. Vale’s tongue flicking over his neck almost is enough to push him over the edge.

“Move,” he growls into the pillow, voice coming out muffled, but Valentino must have understood as he complies willingly now, pushing slowly.

The American accommodates quickly, back arched, hips pushing back to meet Vale’s thrusts and they build up a steady rhythm, bodies sweaty against each other, obscene noises filling the room along with their panting and occasional moans. They can go like this for quite a while, one of the advantages of age, Nicky thinks to himself, one of the few coherent thoughts he manages through this. When Vale’s arms start trembling against his, it’s the cue and they both pick up speed, in perfect synch, moans getting louder and more desperate by the second and of course Vale knows the exact moment to reach under Nicky, stroking his cock, managing to make both of them tense up at the same time, almost coming together with loud growls and strings of swears spilling from their mouths. 

Their panting still fills the room, a small wince from Nicky when Vale pulls away and snuggles up against him the only other sound for the time being. And they don’t need any more words because they’ve been together for so long that they intuitively know what the other wants and needs. It’s Vale who lazily cleans them with some tissues and wraps them with a clean duvet, cuddling up against Nicky’s back, head buried in Nicky’s neck and Nicky loves the way he breathes against his skin, hot and evenly, feeling slowly lulling him into a worry-free sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs in this chapter:  
> Navidad en el country: Crema del Cielo  
> Breathe on me: Britney Spears  
> L'amore è nell'aria: Zucchero  
> Make you feel my love: Bob Dylan (or Adele or Bryan Ferry...; ) )  
> Not with haste: Mumford & Sons


	81. Niente Paura

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, just ♥  
> And it's the return of the cliffhanger. Beware.

_Tira sempre un vento che non cambia niente_   
_mentre cambia tutto sembra aria di tempesta_

Jorge wakes up from the sound of the shower, bed beside him empty. His head is spinning slightly, maybe he did have one or two glasses of wine too much last night? He props himself up, blinking against the seemingly bright light of the morning, wondering if they forgot to close the curtains last night or if Clara opened them on purpose. In the bathroom, the water stops running and his eyes fall to a small package at the end of the bed. _Right. It’s Christmas. Right._ He stumbles out of the bed, his head not amused by the idea, and grabs his bag, rummaging hurriedly. He’s just putting the tiny box, carefully wrapped in golden paper, on the bed when Clara enters, towel around her body, hair in damp curls, flushed and gorgeous and grinning at him like a Cheshire cat. 

“Merry Christmas,” she whispers, falling around his neck and kissing his cheek. _God, you have no idea how good you smell and how nice you feel._ Jorge moans, hands trying to rid her from the towel, but she pulls back, laughing openly and beautifully, perfect teeth shining.

“No way, Jorge Lorenzo, no way! You’ve had enough last night! And I want to unwrap my gift now!”

*******

“Good morning gorgeous!” Dani steps out on the balcony, shivering from the cold air, burying himself deeper in Marc’s hoodie and joins the younger rider in leaning over the railing. “Are you okay?”  
Marc’s head turns slowly, eyes beaming at Dani. “More than that. It’s Christmas and I have you with me. It’s the best Christmas of my life.”   
Marc’s arm wraps around Dani’s shoulders, pulling him close.   
“I got you something.” Marc reaches for his pocket and Dani pouts.  
“Marc, we agreed on no gifts.”  
Marc just shrugs and presses a peck to his pout, handing him a little box. It’s a very, very familiar design and Dani takes it, staring down at the black thing incredulously.  
Next to him, Marc swallows. “I know it’s not the usual thing to do, but after all that happened and what we did or what I did… I kind of want you to have one, too, “he mumbles, while Dani opens the box in slow motion, staring at the ring which looks exactly like the one he gave Marc. He reads the inscription, 26 ∞ 93 and he has to blink and cough and it takes a moment before he is capable of looking up, into his fiancé’s beaming face, pulling him in for a tight embrace and muttering a string of endearments.  
When he finally has the ring where it belongs and is coherent enough to speak again, he remembers and pulls out his phone.  
“I have something for you as well.”  
Marc raises an eyebrow. “I get to play with your phone?”  
“Sure.” Dani nudges him playfully, holding the phone up to let him see the picture that Madame Blecourt’s nephew sent this morning.  
“No you didn’t!” Marc gasps and Dani beams at him, nodding with a devilish grin. “Dani, seriously, you secretly ordered a piano?”

*******

Marta is sitting in Alex’s lap, their hands on her belly, both of them giggling over the hectic movement underneath. 

“Someone is overjoyed today, I think.” Alex leans down to kiss Marta’s head and she squeezes his hand.

“Maybe he knows that it’s Christmas! God, imagine, next year around Christmas he’ll start walking.” She shivers at the thought.

“I KNOW. I can’t believe it. Such a miracle. Seriously, I never, never, never would have thought about becoming a dad anytime soon but it’s so the best feeling in the world.”

“Better than winning that trophy?”

“Better than winning any trophies. It’s like winning THE ONE AND ONLY trophy.” He nibbles on her ear, tickling her and making her giggle and squirm.

“Well, it’s not been on my agenda either, but it’s turned out great, hasn’t it?” Her voice becomes a bit distant.

“You know,” Alex kisses a trail along her neckline and squeezes her hands, chuckling at another kick. “I wish I knew what it feels like.”

“What what feels like?”

“Having him inside of you. I don’t know… it feels like such a close bond, it’s almost making me jealous because it seems you know him so much better.”

“Almost jealous?”

“Okay.” he laces their fingers and sighs. “It makes me jealous.”

*******

Vale sits at the kitchen table, espresso in front of him, watching Nicky prepare breakfast and he no less than adores him. With awe he watches his moves, studies the way the muscles of his back and arms flex in the white, tight V-neck, the way the damp hair curls slightly, the focus in Nicky’s eyes, always sensible, always perfect, always capable on concentrating on the current task. Combined with the comforting domestic scenery, the smell of coffee lingering along with fresh croissants, brought by the wonderful Signora Romeo, even on Christmas.

”You’re staring at me!” Nicky turns around, eyebrows raised, jar of marmalade in his hands.

”I know, and I’m not sorry. You look gorgeous.”

”You could of course get up and make yourself useful!” Nicky pouts.

”Or,” Vale gets up, walks over to the American, wrapping his hands around his neck and smiling devilishly, “Or I could walk over here and make you bend me over the kitchen counter.”

He hears Nicky inhale sharply, right before their lips crash. Nicky’s hands are just moving under Vale’s shirt, nails scraping over the Italian’s back, when behind them two familiar voices chuckle simultaneously, exclaiming, “Guys, seriously, get a room.”

_Having a Marquez around is a true burden… I wonder how Dani and Marta ever cope._

*******

They head to the track after a true family breakfast, everybody chatting animatedly and the feeling of a field trip spreading over the group. Even Clara is talked into her first attempts on a bike, loud squeaking included. She is not a natural talent, but she tries and it’s a great sight to watch Jorge, half-dying from fear, half-dying from laughing, cheering for her, while a more and more desperate Valentino tries to teach her things.

Marta and Dani, both obviously excluded from the activity, sit at the side, warming their hands on mugs of tea and coffee, watching the spectacle with tilted heads and smiles on their faces. 

“You’re not joining them?”

Dani shakes his head determinedly, eyes on the start of a race between the Marquez brothers.

“I thought your hand was better?” Marta nudges him, eyes curious.

“Hm. I mean, it is, I can move it.” Dani shrugs, keeping his eyes on the events in the distance. “But not the way I used to and it’s not strong. The muscles in my arm need time to rebuild and then…”

“And then?”

“I haven’t told Marc, so please keep quiet, but the wrist and hand muscles might not get strong enough to properly use a bike. Not enough strength to brake and so on.”

Marta almost chokes next to him, coughing briefly and cringing now. “You didn’t tell Marc? Again?”

“I KNOW.” Dani looks at her now, eyes pleading for understanding. “But he is so happy and excited right now, I don’t want to break his heart.”

Marta glares at him.

“Promise me you will keep quiet.”

“I will, but I want you to promise me that you will tell him.”

He is just about to answer, to promise anything if she only lets them have a peaceful Christmas when he hears the loud thump, the yelling, the sound of metal and plastic breaking and shattering and his eyes widen in shock while Marta releases a weak squeal, her nails digging into the flesh of his forearm with full force. _Fuck. He's not moving enough._


	82. Hell & Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a bit of a time problem tonight, but after yesterday's ending I really don't want to skip a day (I don't want to torture anyone), so the update is a bit shorter than I originally planned and probably still in a somewhat raw state. Sorry about that, I hope I'll do better tomorrow.  
> ♥

Dani and Marta are sitting there, shell-shocked and frozen, finding the scene across them surreal. And Dani cannot help but noticing the irony of this being the most beautiful, sunny winter day, sun warming them comfortable and sky cloudless. It could be perfect in every sense of the word. Instead, they see the other run around, they hear screaming, they see Marc on his knees, hovering over Alex’s crumpled body, Vale discussing something with Nicky and Jorge, helmet off already and apparently the most sensible right now, pulling out a phone. 

“Dani-“ Next to him, Marta’s voice comes out weak and broken and it makes him come to his senses, cueing him to get up and give her a hand, leading her towards the site of the crash. Squinting, he tries to read the faces of the others, his heart busy beating its way out of his chest. Marc has his back towards him, leaning over his brother and it seems as if they’re talking which would be a good sign. Jorge is still on his phone, looking serious but not panicked and Dani would say the same about the expressions he sees on Vale, Nicky and Clara. He takes a deep breath, hoping that he read the signs right and that it’s not that bad in the end and guides them along the final meters, Marta’s nails still ripping the skin off his forearm. 

The closer they get, Dani carefully helping Marta to make her way over uneven territory, blinking against the sun, thoughts running absolutely wild, the more he thinks it’s going to be okay and when he hesitates, scrutinizing the others’ faces to make sure he can actually bring Marta, a small nod on Nicky’s face is all the encouragement he gets. When they reach the track, she drops his arm and almost runs the last steps, dropping to her knees next to Marc and he hears her voice between sobbing and blabbering and he sees Alex’s hand reach for hers and then, with all certainty, waves relief washing over him, he knows it’s going to be okay.

For Dani though, it suddenly feels like watching a bad horror movie in slow motion as from one moment to the other, all the memories from his crash are returning to his brain. Everything is on replay now, from the moment where he knew he couldn’t avoid it, the short moment where the world had stopped turning, where he only saw Marc’s face and realized he’d found love.

“Hey, are you alright?” Marc is standing next to him, a hand on his shoulder and he turns his head, facing the younger man fully confused, mind slow on processing everything. He hadn’t even seen him get up. “Dani, are you okay?” Marc is frowning now, looking at him genuinely worried.

Dani gulps and coughs, head falling against Marc’s chest. “Sure, sorry. I was just-“

“I know.” Marc wraps an arm around his shoulders and pulls him close. _You know. So does that mean that every time you see these things your mind flashes back to 2011? And when I crashed, I did that to you, too?_

Dani is shuddering under Marc’s touch and clears his throat. “How is Alex?”

Marc shrugs. “His leg is most definitely broken, he’s in a lot of pain and I think he’ll have a slight concussion, but all in all, it could be worse. I mean, he’s conscious, he can feel his limbs, he’s more or less focused.”

“Okay.” Dani nods. “Yeah, could have been worse.”

The chaos around them, the voices, the actions, it passes without Dani noticing, the small rider’s mind gone into some frozen, numb state where all he notices it the warmth of Marc’s embrace, the feeling of being held and sheltered covering his nerves and calming the anxiety, holding it away at arm’s length. Only when the sound of the ambulance approaches and medical staff arrives at the scene, Dani’s brain decides to slowly get back into reality.

“Marc, are you going to the hospital with him? I don’t think it’s a good idea if Marta goes.” 

Vale comes up to them and Marc nods, hesitantly letting go of Dani, who gives him and assuring nod, and they walk over to Alex, who is now on a stretcher, ready for transport. Alex is busy saying a drowsy goodbye to a very teary Marta, held only by Clara, who has automatically slipped into the role of surrogate mother, always being right where she is needed. 

On his tip-toes, Dani steals a last kiss from Marc, the medical staff watching them curiously.

Lips brushing Marc’s ear, he whispers, “Take care of both of you and keep us updated.”

“Of course,” Marc nods. “I will. And I’ll miss you.” And then he is rushed to leave, the sight of him holding Alex’s hand before the doors close behind them touching Dani deeply.

“I’ll drive to the hospital as well,” Nicky says, handing his helmet to Vale and pressing a peck to the Italian’s cheek. And then, there’s only five of them left and Jorge and Vale clear up everything, while Dani helps Clara to get Marta back inside, making her sit down at the kitchen table, making her drink hot tea and piling blankets over her shoulders.

She looks very pale, eyes still teary and doesn’t say much, but it seems that overall she is stable – until Dani notices her cringe badly and at the same time, sees one of her hands rest against her stomach. 

“Are you okay?” He raises an eyebrow and Clara scrutinizes her as well now, frowning.

“Yes, don’t worry. I’m good.” She’s really trying, but Dani is skilled at this, he sees her biting down on her lip, sees the sweat on her forehead and he is pretty sure she is in pain.

“Marta, seriously, what’s wrong?” Clara obviously saw it as well.

The young girl is shaking her head, staring to the ground and Dani’s heart is dropping at the sight.

Trying to hide the panic rising inside of him, he takes one of her hands. “Please, tell us what’s going on! Alex will have our heads if we let anything happen to you.”

Marta clears her throat and Dani gives her hand a reassuring squeeze, waiting nervously for her response and locking gazes with Clara who looks as concerned as he feels. “I think I’m having contractions.”

“Oh shit.” They hadn’t seen Valentino walk up to them, but they hear him now, followed by the loud thump of the helmet he had been carrying hitting the floor.

The room falls entirely silent and all Dani hears in his head is the sound of his own blood rushing, until Jorge comes in as well, just starting to say something about lunch and then realizing the tension, his voice cutting the air like a knife. “What happened? You all look genuinely scared!”

And while it feels like hell is breaking lose around them, Dani is holding Marta’s hand, exchanging a look and a nod, their eyes silently communicating like they did so many times, months ago at Cervera. _We can do this. We’ve been through so much worse._

_We've all been under attack_  
 _We've all been to hell and back_


	83. The Story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again and again and again, thank you for all the great feedback ♥  
> It means SO much!

_And they don't know what I've been through like you do_  
 _And I was made for you..._

_Leg broken. Not too bad, but surgery now. Head okay._ _Nicky

_Marta has contractions. Heading for hospital._ _Vale

_WTF???_ _Nicky

_Tell Marc!_ _Vale

_Will do. Keep us updated and crossing my fingers! xx_ _Vale

“No, we can’t go to there, Signora Romeo said explicitly not to take you there because of they are not specialized.” Dani is in the backseat, holding Marta’s hand – or rather, Marta clawing on his hand, glaring at him now. 

“If the father of my baby is in that hospital right now, why can we not go there?”

“Marta, you are what, four weeks early? We are going to a place with a good, no great, experience and reputation for YOUR condition. Nowhere else. Alex will have me shot if I don’t make sure you’ll get the best treatment possible.”

He sees that she wants to say something, but then the by now familiar cringe spreads over her face and he braces himself, because next he knows, sharp nails are once again drawing blood from his skin and he bites down on his lip, while Marta inhales sharply.

Jorge is driving them rather recklessly, Vale giving directions and fidgeting with his phone, probably texting with Nicky, but Dani doesn’t want to ask, afraid the answer could be an issue for Marta. On Marta’s other side, Clara is looking devastated, scrutinizing Marta and rubbing her own forearm, where Marta’s nails had left the same deep marks they left on Dani’s.

They reach the hospital in record time and Dani wonders just how many speed limits Jorge must have broken, but then they hadn’t been stopped so at least something went their way. Vale had called the hospital, announced who they were, why they were coming and for once, had completely exploited his celebrity status, now giving them the privilege of being allowed to use a private parking garage and being picked up by staff and a resident doctor from their car. With Vale’s help for some translations, Marta manages to explain, handing over her documents with one hand, the other still clutching to Dani’s arm and they are rushed through staff doors and hidden hallways to an examination room. It’s the smell of the hospital alone that makes him nauseous, but he is well aware that this is not the moment to worry about himself. He wants to be there for Marta, who is his family now and whom he cares about a lot. 

Vale sighs. This has been one mess of a time. Being here, crowding a hospital room, feels awfully familiar. His eyes glance over Clara and Jorge, her cuddled up in his lap, both of them tired, worried, distressed, but always holding on to each other. They’ve not even been together for that long, but they seem the most stable among all of them, as a couple and as personalities. And he hasn’t given Jorge the respect he deserves those past years, because the Jorge he met all those years ago has certainly grown up into a very responsible and remarkably loyal man.

With a sigh, he lets his eyes wander over Dani, who is terribly pale, sitting on a chair next to Marta’s bed, forearm in her grip, eyes on her face, expression full of distress. And then he turns to Marta, who is on her back, now, eyes closed, biting down on her lip, while the doctor is attaching stuff to her stomach that Vale only knows from the movies and that makes funny noises. _Strange. I guess I never expected to be in such a situation. And I’m not comfortable with it._

Then, the Italian watches the doctor rub jelly over Marta’s suddenly naked bump and he wonders if it’s appropriate to look, his eyes flickering and suddenly noticing the screen and the image and understanding hits him like a bolt of lightning. _That is the baby. I am watching their baby!_.

The doctor does not bat an eyelid at their strange constellation and Jorge quietly wonders if doctors who deal with celebrities a lot see things like this all the time. He hadn’t even looked strange when he asked who the dad was and they explained that was neither of the three of them. Now however, he is staring at them, then turning his head back to Marta and for the first time, he seems insecure. “I have to check… erm. I don’t know if you are okay with the gentlemen to be here, but we will have to take your pants off. And Jorge couldn’t even say who blushes the most of all the men in the room but under Clara and Marta’s giggling – the latter he takes as an extremely promising sign – the three of them find themselves piled up outside of the room in a second.

”Cigarette?” Vale holds up the box and the others nod, a bit weakly, faces pale. They find a somewhat hidden way out to a more or less hidden parking deck and at least they don’t notice anyone taking pictures of them. The Italian lights his cigarette, passing them to Dani and then he checks his phone. No messages from Nicky yet, so Alex is still in surgery. Vale sighs and in his head, counts the hours, wondering whether that’s still normal duration. And he should text Nicky something, but truth to be told, they don’t know much yet. The baby looked amazing to him and as far as he heard, it seems to be doing fine, but Vale has no idea if that means everything will be okay. 

“Anything from the Marquez brothers?” Jorge nudges him, cigarette in mouth and holding out his cigarettes to him.

Vale takes them back, sliding them into his jeans and shrugs. “Not yet, probably still in surgery.”

“He’ll be okay,” Jorge says, sounding slightly defiant and Vale glances at Dani who is staring to the floor. 

They smoke in silence for a while, all somewhat lost in thoughts until Dani stubs his cigarette swiftly and pulls out his phone.

“I will go and call Marc, I have to know what’s going on.”>

”He’s got it bad,” Jorge chuckles, blowing some smoke in Vale’s direction.

_Of all the crazy shit that’s happened, us being friends now is probably really the craziest._ Vale grins back at the Spanish rider, nodding and knowing that Jorge is more than right, Dani sure is hopelessly in love. Luckily, Vale is quite sure that Marc feels the same way.

The doctor completes the check-up, patiently and thoroughly, explaining everything he does and sees and what it means and overall, things look okay, Clara thinks. Apparently, 37th week is okay to give birth and the baby might be big enough to stay with Marta, not having to be taken to ICU. In fact, they can have a normal birth and everything. It amazes her to know end how much there is to consider and to know and she realizes that she has no idea about any of this, while Marta certainly has done her reading, communicating with the doctor on eye-to-eye level while Clara is lost for most of the conversation. When he leaves and wants to send the guys back in, Marta shakes her head, surprising Clara.

It is quiet for a while, with Marta just lying there, her hand in Clara’s. Then, the young girl props herself up on her elbows and glares at Clara, her expression defiant. 

“I will not give birth without Alex.”

”Marta, they say you’re too far along now and they cannot to anything to hold it back.” Clara frowns. _You are a teenager after all._

”No I won’t do that without Alex. Tell me a story!”

Staring at Marta with a blank expression, Clara exclaims, ”What?”

”A story. Tell me how you met Jorge!

And because arguing with Marta is not an option right now, Clara complies.

_”Well, we met during the Barcelona weekend. He was out with sponsors, I think and I had visited a friend from college and we ended up at the same restaurant. I hadn’t even watched a single race before that and I mean, I had probably seen his face in the paper and on TV but never paid attention and neither had my friend. So we were eating really peacefully, talking about this and that and somehow wondering about the occasional fan at the neighboring table. Some people would just get up, blush, tremble and walk over to the table, asking him for an autograph and my friend and I looked at each other in complete confusion and still kept eating. And then he finally put those sunglasses away, they hadn’t done the trick of keeping the fans away in the first place after all. And then I saw his full face and our eyes just kind of met and that was it.”_

Clara pauses, gathering her breath, her hand squeezed tightly by Marta whose breath hitches as she has another contraction. After an instant, the younger woman clears her throat. “So it was love at first sight?”

_”I think love is quite a big word. But both of us were intrigued and when we were ready to leave, he managed to go to the restroom so that our paths would cross and he bumped into me and made a big scene of apologizing and introducing himself. I thought it was pretty ridiculously set up, but his childish smile during that little thing was beyond adorable. God, he was so proud of his plan and I couldn’t break his heart, you know? So when he asked me for my name and number, I gladly gave him both. Honestly though, I never expected him to call. Especially not after we googled him and I realized whom I had met. But the day after, the Friday before the race, my phone rang, like right in the morning. I was just getting up at my friend’s place, I answered the unfamiliar number without thinking and then I heard his voice and almost choked.”_

Another contraction, another tight squeeze, another audible hitch in Marta’s breath. _Don’t they always say breathe during those movies?_

_”He laughed at my reaction and I must have turned into a complete tomato, but he was so cute about it and he really suggested a date. And I didn’t want to go, because I thought it must all be some kind of joke, but in the end, I went to the bar he suggested, a really private and expensive place and he was really there. It was incredible, for both of us, I think and we almost didn’t talk at all that first night. We sat across from each other, smiled, looked away, smiled again. I giggled. A lot. And we had way too much wine and ended up making out in a taxi and I slept in his motorhome. Don’t judge. I usually wouldn’t do it, but with Jorge – it just seemed natural. Well, from then on, things were set. Everybody would have told me that I was a one-night thing for him, but I knew, I just really, really knew that wasn’t what it was about. I think, after that first night, I knew we loved each other. And I don’t think I ever had that with anyone before Jorge._


	84. Halo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What I forgot yesterday: The idea for the "I'm not giving birth without the baby's father" and the "tell me a story" thing are taken from How I Met Your Mother!   
> And thank you so much for the feedback! ♥

Clara has just finished her story, Marta’s hand now clenching in hers again, tightly enough to break bones, when the there’s a tentative knock against the door. 

”Hey, it’s Dani. Can I come in?”

Clara looks over to Marta, eyebrow raised and the younger woman nods, face still tense and obviously still in a bit of pain. Before she opens, Clara quickly checks on Marta’s look and pulls the sheets over her legs, earning a grateful look. _I have no idea what that feels like, but I guess overall, you’re taking this pretty well._

”Hey Dani,” Clara smiles, pulling the small ride, the only one even shorter than her, in her arms. 

“Hey,” he clears his throat and she doesn’t like that tone. Not a bit. “I talked to Marc.”

Dani sits down on the bed, taking Marta’s hand, pushing some stray hairs out of her face and she’s amazed at the easy bond between the two. They must have crossed some pretty dark valleys together these past months. And it’s impossible to miss the way Marta relaxes when Dani is around.

”What did he say? How is Alex?” Marta sounds croaky now and Clara feels her own heart rush and thunder, threatening to burst.

”Alex is okay, the surgery went well, no problems and he might be back walking in six weeks. His head is also doing fine and he should wake up any minute.” A weak smile crosses Alex’s face.

Still, Marta doesn’t look relieved. “But?” She asks insistently. 

Dani coughs. “But?”

”Seriously, don’t try to pretend, Dani.” Marta frowns. “What is the problem?”

There is a seemingly infinite pause before Dani clears his throat, fingers toying with the hem of his shirt. “They won’t have him transferred here before tomorrow. It’s too dangerous.”

The tension in the room is palpable and Clara is holding her breath, biting her lip, waiting for Marta’s reaction. To her surprise – and impressing her to no ends – Marta does not even shed a tear over the news. Her lips are trembling, but she manages, staring at the computer screen, watching the monitor of the baby’s heart rate that’s constantly rushing noisily.

”That’s okay, we’ll make it,” she whispers, hands over her stomach now, shielding the baby, voice distant and seemingly having a private communication with the little one. Clara could cry at the sight, as it’s one of the most beautiful scenes she’s ever seen. Marta’s slim fingers, over that bump ever so protectively, head leaning down, glossy black hair hanging over the white sheets like a beautiful curtain, paper white skin of her arms almost invisible against the hospital linen. 

”Should I let Jorge and Vale back in?” Dani asks softly after a while and Marta nods.

Clara opens the door and her eyes search the hallway, soon finding the guys and waving them over. They come walking in step, an amazing sight considering their relationship when Clara and Jorge met and the mere mention of Vale’s name would cause Jorge to have a spontaneous self-combustion.

”How is the baby?” It’s Vale who asks, leaning against the wall across from Marta and Clara leans back in Jorge’s arms, feeling safe and comforted, even when she’s surrounded by hospital smell and the sound of half a dozen medical somethings. 

”It’s okay. Heart is strong and it’s far enough. I’ve just reached 37th week and it’s more than heavy enough so they think he’ll be fine and-“ Her voice stops abruptly, hand clenching in Dani’s arm, face cringing now. Another contraction. They seem rather frequent to Clara, but according to the staff, they might have ten hours ahead of them. When she releases that information to the guys, they almost fall over from shock.

”You have to be kidding me? Nature really hasn’t planned this well, has it?” Jorge stares at her, eyes widened and she cannot help but chuckle.

From the bed, they hear Marta, voice still somewhat breathless but apparently better now, “It’s really going to be a long night, guys. And I want another story, so Vale, tell me how you and Nicky met.” 

Clara sees the guys giving her confused looks, not understanding the story-thing, but she just shrugs and nods. _As long as it helps her, why not? And actually, I’d love to know…_

”Seriously?” Vale sounds a bit croaky and Clara stares at the Italian, surprised to see him blushed.

”Please.”

Vale sits down on the foot end of the bed, Dani still sitting next to Marta’s head and Jorge sits down on the chair next to the bed, Clara cuddled up in his lap, while Valentino Rossi slowly, with a soft and at times trembling voice, tells them about him and Nicky.

_Okay… so we met in 2003 and ..._ Guys, don’t inhale so sharply. We’re not that old. Well, compared to you, maybe we are, but still. You make it sound like we’re ancient. _”So we met in 2003, as teammates for Honda and I don’t really know how to say it, but there was something. Like, even right during our first real face-to-face during testing. There’s always been something in Nicky’s smile, in his eyes, that made me look at him for that tiny bit longer than I’d looked at any of my other teammates. And he was so unimpressed about working with me, so casual, a lot of the way Marc always behaves_ “  
Vale gives Dani a long look.  
 _”I wasn’t sure how to deal with it and that had nothing to do with him being a man. I mean… I wasn’t that surprised about that, it had happened to me before, rarely, but it had. But he was a rider, and not even just a rider, he was my teammate. And that was new. So I got kind of awkward around him and – I didn’t know then, but he told me later – he had been feeling intrigued by me before, too and felt hurt when I got awkward and distant and for the most part of the season, we were pretty tense around each other. Then, during the finale and the celebrations and the parties, something changed, because there was a night where we drank. Not glasses or bottles, rather gallons and barrels of alcohol. And it was one of those nights where Nicky would not fall asleep from the drinking but instead he was suddenly a bit clingy and always a bit too close and I was fighting, but losing at the battle and by the time either of us realized what we were about to do, it didn’t matter anymore. We just realized ‘oh, hey, you’re a dude’ and fell into the sheets with each other.”_

There is an interruption in the story, Marta panting slightly, nails digging in Dani’s forearm. Then, it’s over again, her face falling back on the pillow and Dani holding a cup of water for her.

_”And that’s when things got really complicated. For the next more or less ten years we’ve been somewhere between heaven and hell. It’s taken us years to acknowledge that we weren’t just having fun, but that we’d fallen somewhere along the way, that somewhere between hidden meetings in motorhomes, sneaky overnight stays in hotels and at some point between arguing and yelling we had fallen, and not just a little bit. It only started getting better after-“_

Vale stops and his eyes wander to the floor. Clara has the feeling that she is the only one missing out on something important, unsure of what she forgot until Dani whispers a breathless “2011”. _Oh._ And she realizes what was behind the unspoken part of that sentence. Vale has buried his face in his hands now and she wonders if they should do something, when a wince from Marta interrupts her thoughts.

”Clara, call the nurse, I want an epidural now.” Marta cringes and Clara sees her bite her lip, forehead covered in sweat and hurries to call for a nurse. The guys know their cue and leave and Clara awes them on their way out, Dani’s hand on Vale’s arm Jorge walking on Vale’s other side, head tilted towards the Italian rider. _Ten years… I had no idea they’d been a thing for so long._

Marta is checked upon and, to her frustration, told that she will probably have to wait for another hour. Clara realizes that it’s slowly getting dark outside again, evening approaching rapidly and the growling in her stomach reminds her that actually, food would be a good idea. And the next time, the guys come up to the room, she sends them to get something which they manage to do, returning with panini, cake and a huge pizza. From the other hospital, they receive the good news that Alex is awake and they end up spending their first Christmas as a group in different places but closely connected over video call, a still very drowsy Alex, teary eyes and everything, muttering endearments into the camera for an equally teary Marta, who quietly sniffs on the screen of her phone. They have a picnic on her bed, phone still on video call, Marc, Alex and Dani having hospital dinner on Alex’s bed, eyeing their pizza with a bit of jealousy. The phone call ends with lots of declarations of love from all three of the couples that were currently kept apart and with the promise that next year, they’d really spend Christmas together.

Marta’s eyes flood with relief when during the next check-up – the guys out for another cigarette – the nurse tells them that she will call the anesthetist and that Marta is far enough for an epidural. 

”Are you scared?” Clara squeezes the younger woman’s hand, still admiring how she stayed mostly calm and quiet through this.

Clara shrugs slightly. “I don’t know. Yes and no. I kind of just want it to be over but kind of just want to wait until Alex is here. And I feel bad whining about the pain because I think all of them have been through so much worse.”

”You’re one tough cookie.” Clara sighs, squeezing the cold, sweaty hand in hers once again, hoping that things pick up a bit of speed now. And they actually do, Marta becoming more and more distressed, hectic around them growing, a doctor joining the nurse and when the men return from their cigarette, Clara pretty much slams the door closed in their faces. 

*******

”How do you think that feels?” Dani gives Vale a questioning look, lighting up another cigarette in the dark, shivering in the cold air. 

”How does what feel?” Vale asks a bit absentmindedly, thoughts still a bit lost in memories.

”Having a baby.”

”Oh. Like from a female perspective? Evidence suggests it hurts – Oww!” Dani nudges Vale hard.

”Seriously, do you think we can ever compensate that?”

”Oh Dani, how would I know? I just think missing that one, certainly breathtaking moment, but gaining the love of your life is worth it.”

Dani is just about to reply something when they hear noises and turn, seeing figures in the distance, pushing something towards them and the closer they get, the more they realize that it’s actually the Marc and Nicky with Alex in a wheelchair.

”You gotta be kiddin?” Vale pulls Nicky in an embrace, frowning.

”Yes, what were you thinking?” Dani glares at Marc, or at least tries, when all he wants is hug and squeeze the other.

”I’ll apologize later. Please get me to Marta.” Alex voice sounds tired, but after all, he is still in a hospital so why should it be a problem?

*******

It’s the last steps, Marta releasing occasional screams now, Clara sure that the damage to her hand, wrist and forearm left by Marta’s nails is permanent, doctor trying to cheer her on when Clara finally hears the nurse say that she sees the head and that Marta was allowed to start pressing. 

The door opens in the exact second where Marta says that she can feel him and Clara’s eyes dart between the man rolling inside in his wheelchair and the baby that’s taken to rest on Marta’s chest. Clara looks into Alex’s eyes, flooding with tears and then Marta’s, tears falling freely as well and she decides to leave, Marta’s hand leaving her arm in order to cling to Alex now anyway.

”You’re here…” Marta blinks incredulously and it’s impossible to say whether she means the baby or Alex. “Hello there! Mommy loves you!” Her fingers gently stroke over the rumpled face and Alex’s fingers meet her there, doing the same. The couples’ gazes meet, full of affection. 

”Daddy loves you, too.” Alex realizes that his voice sounds pathetic, but he doesn’t care, not tonight.

”I can’t believe you were immature and stupid enough to come here.” Marta glares at him briefly, then her lips start twitching and spread into a broad smile. “And God, I’m so grateful you did this.

Alex just smirks. The nurse then has to take the baby for brief testing, measuring and checks. During the time where she is gone with the little one, they stay in place, fingers laced, eyes incredulous and overwhelmed. Alex cannot stop crying, the day has just been too much to handle and Marta feels the same way. And actually, it’s a new day, kind of, because it’s a fair bit past midnight already.

*******

They are finally reunited, baby dressed in a cute outfit they’d bought together only a week ago, embroidered with a Motorcycle bearing a number 12 and resting safely in Marta’s arms. Alex moves the wheelchair towards the door, hand reaching for the knob, exchanging a last questioning look with Marta who nods reassuringly. So he holds the door open, smiling at the sight in front of him, Clara cuddled up on Jorge’s lap, Marc and Dani in a tight embrace, Vale and Nicky softly speaking, foreheads touching. The younger Marquez coughs briefly, catching their attention, blushing and making a gesture towards the room.

“Guys, say hello to Marco. My son.”

_Everywhere I'm looking now_   
_I'm surrounded by your embrace_


	85. Aria

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _"You know_  
>  in this way are born  
> fairy-tales that I'd like to have  
> in all of my dreams" 

_Sai, nascono così_   
_Fiabe che vorrei_   
_Dentro tutti i sogni miei_

The name. It’s probably killing all of them, but it certainly hits Marc and Vale hardest, both tearing up helplessly, Nicky quick to steady the sobbing Italian against his shoulder, Dani reaching for Marc’s hand. Jorge watches, with a bit of a distance, aware that Clara and him were not quite as close, never quite as involved, but he would lie if said that there he didn’t have to bite his lip to stop the tears now. Clara is smiling beautifully, standing a bit behind Alex and while Marc is stepping closer to his brother, tentative finger stroking over the face of his nephew, Dani leaning against his side, Jorge walks over to his girl who welcomes him in her arm, pressing herself close and he wraps his arms around her, burying his head in his own hoodie that looks better on her anyway, inhaling the smell of her shampoo and secretly drying his tears in the fabric and her hair.

”God, Alex, he looks perfect.” Marc’s voice is breathless, full of affection, awe and disbelief, bending down towards Alex’s lap, his finger carefully tracing the baby’s arm, searching its fingers. From the side, their hands clasped between them, Dani glances at Marc, the beaming smile on his face, tears on his cheeks and amazement written all over him. _Pure bliss. That’s what it is about._ And his eyes wander down towards Alex’s face, noticing that the younger Marquez cannot take his eyes off his son, same look of disbelief and pure happiness as on Marc’s, traces of tears. It’s one of those moments that should never ever end, but then they make their way inside, Dani noticing that Vale is still crying quietly into Nicky’s shoulder, the American holding the taller rider close, mumbling something, eyes full of love. And he walks inside the room, to a tired-looking but amazingly broadly smiling young girl, black hair spread on the white pillow, looking as beautiful as Snow White, as surreal as a fairytale’s princess, pale hands folded in her lap. 

”Congratulations,” Dani whispers, leaning down to press a peck on her cheek, feeling her hand brush over his.

”Thank you. For everything.” She smiles at him, all the pain they shared crossing her face, memories flooding his mind as well and he nods, smiling back.

”You’re welcome.” He squeezes her hand, making room for Marc, who hugs her, sobbing against her shoulder, blabbering things about how beautiful the baby is and not stopping to thank her for choosing the name. 

After a while, Dani having congratulated Alex as well, Marc having said every compliment possible about his nephew, baby being handed from Alex to Marta because it cried briefly and Alex actually being moved from wheelchair to the bed, resting next to Marta – the three of them the most gorgeous sight Dani has ever seen, a scene of perfect harmony, peace and love – Marta points to the door, in front of which Nicky was still taking care of Vale. 

”Is that our fault?” She sounds a little scared.

”It’s because of the name, yes,” Dani says slowly, “But it’s not a fault. I think he’s overwhelmed with memory, but I am sure he not only admires it, he loves it. Just give him a bit.”

*******

They get back to the ranch in the very early morning hours, everything still entirely dark outside and the air very cold, their breath coming out in little white clouds when they head inside, hands clasped, following Vale and Nicky inside who walk arm in arm, Vale’s head against Nicky’s. They’d left Dani and Marc at the hospital, Marc wanting to be by Alex’s side obviously – the brothers yet have to inform their mother and Jorge understands well that they fear Roser’s reaction to their Christmas whereabouts. As much as they’d reminisced about the night at the hospital with Dani, they didn’t want to repeat the group experience now, not wanting to crowd the young family.

“Coffee?” Nicky asks as soon as they set a foot inside the building.

”Yes, please,” Clara sights, voice full of gratitude and they stumble into the living room, cuddling up on a couch, Jorge holding her close, feeling her body heat, her heartbeat, his head in her hair, drowning in her smell, while he wraps a blanket around them. Vale lights a fire in the chimney before he takes the couch across from them wordlessly, eyes still red but other than that, looking composed again. Nicky joins them a minute later, tablet with coffee on the low table and then Jorge watches with fascination how he plops down next to Vale, two mugs in his hands and how, with an immense gracefulness, the two arrange themselves, every move perfectly in harmony, Nicky’s head easily finding the right spot on Vale’s shoulder, Vale’s arm around the American’s waist, not a drop of coffee spilled. 

”You never finished your story, Vale,” Clara says softly, blowing into her cup.

”What story?” Nicky raises an eyebrow.

”Vale told us how you became a couple,” Clara explains, her fingers warming slowly from the hot porcelain, her eyes watching the flames play in the chimney.

”Oh.” The American cuddles up even closer against the Italian, smirking up to his boyfriend. “And he didn’t finish?”

”Not yet.” Vale says absentmindedly. “I will if you insist.”

”In that case, I insist,” Clara exclaims and Jorge chuckles at Vale’s exasperated sigh. _Yup, that’s my girl._

_”As I said, in 2011 we had spent most of the season arguing, yelling at each other, blaming the other for things being complicated and regretting we ever started anything. I admit that a lot of it was me, was my hesitation, my fear, my inability to accept myself for who I had become. And then, things changed. Because suddenly, racing was not everything. Success was not everything. Reputation was not everything. Not that I suddenly wanted to yell it to the world, but I think from then on, if being with Nicky had ended my career, I would have been okay with it. It’s so cheesy, such a movie thing, but that day, that month maybe, it made me see that life is really short and I wanted to be happy and deep down I knew what made me happy, I knew who made me happy. And I realized that just about on time and luckily, I got what I wanted and what I needed.”_

Vale falls silent and Jorge can hear him gulp slightly. The Spanish rider watches Nicky slowly tilt his head upwards, sees a tear on the American’s cheek, while Vale bends down to kiss his boyfriend’s forehead, their gazes locked with affectionate expressions. On Nicky’s stomachs, their hands rest and Nicky’s slides into Vale’s now, fingers lacing, squeezing slightly. _I had no idea, all these years I didn’t have a single clue. And it’s all so much clearer right now, all the pieces falling into place. I wish you would have just explained it then and would have saved us all these years at war, but I guess the way was necessary to get to where we are now._

*******

They finish their coffee in silence and when the first light of the morning tentatively illuminates the room, Vale and Nicky excuse themselves to go outside for a cigarette. Clara’s fingers toy with her necklace, the brand new piece of jewelry around her neck, realizing that – despite last morning’s slight and badly hidden disappointment – Jorge had done the right thing picking it. She wasn’t ready for a ring, they weren’t. She thinks about all that these two men had made it through together, mentally notes down what Dani and Marc, though together for only a fraction of that time, had been through and hell, even the teenagers had been through more twists of fate. Time for her and Jorge would come, for sure, but he’d been right, it isn’t here quite yet.

*******

Marc wakes up with an armful of Dani in his lap, his muscles and bones not impressed with the short night sleep on two hospital chairs. The room is faintly lit, the day just dawning and his eyes fall to the bed, blinking tears away that dwell up immediately when he takes in the sight, Marta’s head in the crook of Alex neck, tiny Marco half on her and half on Alex’s chest, sound asleep, Marta’s arm wrapped protectively around both, the baby and Alex’s chest. Maybe these are the last peaceful moments the three will have for a while. All he can say is that they look incredibly beautiful together and that he’s never been more proud of his brother. In his own arms, Dani is stirring, head sleepily turning towards him.

”Hey sleepyhead,” he whispers, smiling at the smaller rider who has long taken over his heart, won his soul, gotten a hold of his life, marveling the ruffled look, hair disheveled, eyes sleepy and a bit disoriented, nose wrinkled.

”Morning. God, everything hurts.” Dani stretches slowly, reaching up to kiss his cheek, Marc’s skin burning under the soft touch and his arms pulling Dani closer, holding him tighter, head buried in his neck, stubble scratching his cheeks. _I’m never letting go._

_Aria… respirami il silenzio_   
_Non mi dire "Addio"_   
_Ma solleva il mondo_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _"Air, inbreathe me with silence  
>  don't tell me goodbye but lift up the entire world"_


	86. Calm Before The Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to have a plot. Then I got distracted. ♥

It’s Alex who finally calls Roser, explaining to her what happened, her reaction between joy and anger, demanding to also talk to Marc and yelling at the older Marquez for about ten minutes straight. Marc just held the phone a bit away from his ear, trying to suppress a giggle. He hasn’t expected anything else and he knows she’ll have forgotten all about it once she meets her grandson in person – which would, unexpectedly but considering the first name quite suitably, take place in Italy because Marco and Alex should have a few days of rest now. 

Marc frowns. Taking him here had been the most dangerous and ridiculous thing they’d ever done. The final result so to speak has been perfect, but if anything would have gone wrong, he would never have forgiven himself. He shudders at the memory of Alex, giving him those helpless puppy dog eyes, pleading with his older brother and Nicky to take him to Marta. They’d given in, surrendered to the pain in the young man’s eyes at almost the same second, sighing exasperatedly, cringing and probably both shaking with fear. It worked out well in the end though, he reminds himself, putting Alex’s phone back and glancing over the young family, still cuddled up on the bed, holding the little miracle, that against all odds is perfectly healthy, well-adjusted and that should be allowed to leave the hospital in a couple of days. 

It’s really somewhat strange to look at them, seeing at the pride in their eyes and knowing that he and Dani will never have exactly that. Of course, depending on where they ultimately choose to live, they might get close, but there will always be a tiny bit of an incredibly huge experience missing for them. It feels a little sad for Marc and he wonders how this is for Dani, who has had problems with loving a man from the start.

Lately though, there’s been no sign that Dani has any issues left with their relationship. Now, he’s curled up in one of the chairs, head cuddled against Marc’s hoodie as a pillow, fallen right back to sleep after breakfast and not even woken by Roser’s yelling that echoed through the room. Marc chuckles at the sight and looks back to the bed, Marta asleep as well, holding Marco on her stomach.

“I think I’ll wake him and then we’ll head to the ranch and come back in the afternoon, bringing you guys some of your stuff, would that be okay?” Marc sits down on the edge of the bed, next to Alex, proud of the joy and pride in his brother’s eyes that cannot leave Marco for more than a second. 

“That would be fabulous actually. Marta has most of her stuff, I guess, God, she even remembered to bring clothes for the baby. Women are crazy. But I need basically everything.” Alex shoots him a quick, grateful glance, eyes immediately wandering back to his son.

“She sure is amazing, but you did a fairly good job with this, too.” Marc playfully nudges his younger brother and he has to will his voice not to start trembling, because he is still so moved by all of this.

“Thank you, for everything and especially for taking me here. And tell Nicky, too. I know that was a lot to ask from you.” Alex eyes meet his now properly, holding his gaze and Marc tries really hard not to cry, realizing the younger man is doing the same.

“Okay,” Marc clears his throat, getting up swiftly after giving Alex a quick squeeze, “I’ll get Dani and then we’re off and you guys have some privacy.”

*******

They walk into the ranch together and it felt totally natural to drive there in Nicky’s car and to open the door with a key instead of ringing, making Marc realize that – without consciously noticing it – they had not only found the best friends possible but also a surrogate family and a second, possibly third home. Dani stumbles along next to him, leaning against his side, looking more asleep than awake and they don’t even look for the others to say hi, heading straight to their room instead.

Marc shoves Dani onto the mattress and strips matter-of-factly, before he leans down to the younger man to undress him. He has barely started, only socks and shirt gone, when Dani’s eyes fly open, suddenly looking rather awake, hands reaching around the younger man’s neck and pulling him down for a wet and sloppy kiss. They indulge, slowly and gently, soft moans audible, Marc feeling his arousal grow when his naked cock rubs over the rough fabric of Dani’s jeans and shivering because it is cool in their room. When they break apart, lips parted, slightly breathless, he scrutinizes Dani’s face.

”What did I do to deserve that?” He blurts out, still gasping a little, cock straining against Dani’s lap, arms trembling.

Dani smirks up at him, eyes vicious and then speaks with a very low, hoarse and sexy voice, sound sending shivers down Marc’s spine. “God, I’ve been craving to do that forever. You have no idea how desirable you are when you are so caring and emotional. I could have dry humped you right there and then, in the hospital’s bathroom or parking lot.”

”In that case,” Marc leans forward to nibble on Dani’s earlobe, the smaller rider moaning softly again, “I’m really proud of your self-restraint.”

Dani groans and then pinches his ass, making Marc let out something between a growl and a wince in return. Crashing their lips again, the younger rider starts fumbling with the other’s belt and jeans, Dani eagerly pushing up his hips for assistance, Dani’s hands running through Marc’s hair. When Dani moves one hand down, brushing along his arm from wrist to armpit and then down his side, Marc’s body shudders, a jolt going down to his groin and he replies by vigorously pushing the rest of Dani’s pants away, fully-erect cock springing free and Marc’s fingers reaching for it immediately, tracing a line from base to tip. 

Dani breaks their kiss, staring at him with almost black eyes and growls, “I want to fuck you into oblivion, I want to make you so sore you’ll wish you’d never have to walk again.”

The words go straight to Marc’s lap, cock twitching in anticipation and, coherence lost already, he nods slowly, eyes hypnotized by Dani’s demanding look. They don’t usually do things that way, but right now, Marc feels that turning around, getting on his hands and knees is too tempting not to and while he positions himself, he hears Dani groan behind him, hears the hectic rustling, bedside drawer being opened. 

”You look incredible like this.” Dani’s fingers trail over his spine, stopping short before his ass and he feels the cool liquid dropping in his cleft, making him shudder once again, his arms trembling dangerously, so that he leans down on his forearms, forehead against the mattress now, hands grabbing fistfuls of sheets when Dani traces a line through his cleft, brushing over his hole, teasingly stroking his balls. Inhaling sharply, he arches his back, fully aware of the needy sounds falling from his mouth.

Behind him, Dani chuckles briefly before a finger finally finds its way inside Marc, the young rider letting out a desperate moan, hips bucking to meet Dani’s digit, muscles clenching tightly. He feels Dani’s other hand between his legs, playing with his balls lazily, while the other hand keeps opening him and it is a perfect mix of slight burn and complete pleasure, Marc’s mind soon in a state of trance, focused only on Dani’s moves, moans just falling from his mouth. 

It’s a moment of torture when Dani’s fingers, after hitting his prostate in the most beautiful way over and over, pull away and leave him disappointingly empty and Marc winces, fingers clenching even tighter in the sheets now, relief washing over him when he feels Dani’s cock against his hole, pressing forward, Dani’s hands now gripping his hips firmly, nails digging into his skin, but the pain not reaching his brain because Dani is buried inside him now and that just feels incredibly good.

Marc distantly remembers how, in their earlier days, Dani had tried to be gentle with him. He still does that at times, but by now, Marc also knows a Dani who takes what he wants with full confidence and today is one of those days, Dani immediately picking up at relentless speed, thrusts hard, noises from their flesh slapping against each other’s obscene. Dani’s grip is tight and Marc can hear the other moan and pant while he buries his head in the mattress and sheets, growling softly. A moment later, one hand lets go of his hip bones and finds his cock, tugging skillfully and his head jerks up, string of swears coming out of his mouth.

Again, memories of shy, insecure Dani flash through his brain, images that seem unrelated with the man who is pounding into him right now, the man whose - admittedly shyly and red-faced - mentioned wish for their wedding night makes Marc come almost from the imagination. Said man is now giving him the most wonderful pleasure with his hand, occasionally leaning over him to bite down in his neck between the thrusts, creating a perfect mix of pain and pleasure and certainyl marking him for days. With a low moan, Marc’s head drops back to the mattress, glad about the way things changed and finally reaching total oblivion when Dani’s fingers circle his cock firmly now.

”Close.” He breathes it more than he says it, his hips jerking back frantically to match Dani’s rhythm and Dani slams even harder now, growling through it.

Inside of him, Marc feels the orgasm build up, slowly and strongly, tension close to unbearable and when Dani comes inside of him with a desperate cry of his name, everything is released, washing over Marc like a tidal wave, leaving him shuddering and screaming, mind completely blanked out. 

Later, he finds himself collapsed flat on his stomach, still gasping for air, Dani pulled out already and cuddled up against his side. 

”That was a pleasant surprise,” he drawls tiredly, his arms around Dani’s waist, fingers laced now. 

”Glad you liked it,” Dani mumbles, voice muffled because he is speaking against Marc’s skin. “I did too.”

Dani’s breath becomes more and more even now, tell-tale sign that he is falling asleep. Marc has too many thoughts running through his head to follow Dani’s example right now, realizing that his parents are coming soon, that they will have to inform Dani’s family about their impending wedding sooner or later, worrying about Alex and his family and with the new year just around the corner, too aware that the next season will be quite different. For all of them.

_Never lost the will to live_  
 _And this can't be denied_  
 _In the calm before the storm_


	87. Close To The Flame

_The arms, safest_   
_and words so good_   
_The faith deepest_   
_in this world so cold and cruel_

**New Year’s Eve, Cervera**   


“So, how are you doing?” Julia flops down on the armchair outside, next to his younger son and gives Alex an inquiring look.

Alex shrugs. “I think I’m okay. Marco is perfect, you know? Everything about him is just perfect and whenever I look at him or at Marta I really just want to cry. Did you feel like that, too?”

Contemplating, thoughts travelling back two decades, Julia nestles with a cigarette. “Hmm, from what I remember, I was quite similar. In the very beginning. Then, you guys would start to become demanding and the tiredness took over,” he says it with a chuckle and Alex returns the smile.

“Do you think I will be okay, as a dad?” Alex almost chokes on the words.

Shifting the cigarette from one hand to the other, Julia takes Alex’s hand in his and stares into the dark sky.

“That depends.”

The young man coughs. “On what?”

“Do you love him? With all of your heart? So much that the pure thought of him in pain makes you go blind with furor?”

“Yes,” Alex gulps audibly, “Yes, definitely.”

“Well, then you’ll be just perfect.”

*******

Roser leans back on the couch, Marco asleep against her shoulder, Marta asleep in an armchair next to the fireplace and tears are slowly running down her cheeks, events of the past week, past months, past year slowly sinking in. She had cried so badly when they had picked them up from Italy. Marco is by far the most beautiful baby she has ever seen, even if Alex and Marc frowned at her for insisting. He is though, just the right mix of Marta and Alex, beautiful blue eyes, amazingly long black hair and lashes already, face pure symmetrical perfection. Simply irresistible. And that name. All the memories, because 2011 has, in so many ways, been a fateful year for them and of course, Marco is not far from Marc and she knows about and is quite fond of the close bond between her sons. It’s a bit of Alex’s way to thank his older brother and the relief that her boys have settled their differences is pure bliss for Roser. The only thing she’ll have to adjust to during the next year is that new name… grandma. She doesn’t feel like a grandmother, but she reckons, most women don’t feel like one when they become one. And if she recalls correctly, it had felt strange to be called mommy after Marc was born, so probably the name would stick with time. It’s only half an hour left until midnight, but she doubts Marta is going to wake up and it doesn’t feel all that important whether it’s 2014 or 2015 anymore, certainly not important enough to wake the poor girl for. Alex must have sent her through a hell of a rollercoaster with that unnecessary accident. A frown spreads over Roser’s face, vanishing quickly when her eyes fall on Marco. _Julia’s right. Everything’s ended well and now, everything is starting well._

**New Year’s Eve, Majorca**  
This must be the first time in Clara’s life that she doesn’t celebrate the start of a new year with a giant party and the thought makes her feel a tiny bit old, but then she looks at Jorge, who is leaning over a pot of steaming vegetables, insisting on fixing her dinner, looking flushes, hectic, a bit ruffled and most adorable and suddenly, there’s no place she’d rather be. Chin propped up on the kitchen counter, glass of red in her hand, she marvels him and his efforts, chuckling at the silent curses falling from his head while he struggles with the steaks. Under the yellow T-Shirt, she can see the muscles of his back move and absentmindedly licks her lower lip, just the moment where he turns around. 

She coughs and blushes and of course he’d seen the gesture and immediately smirks at her, waggling his eyebrows.

”Like what you see?” He teasingly turns around fully, muscles of his chest at least as tempting as those of his back and Clara bites her lip.

”Possibly,” she says after a while, trying to make it sound as casual as possible.

”Maybe you can look at more after dinner.”

”Unless I starve before you’re finished with cooking,” she retorts dryly, chuckling at his pout. _God, you must be the cutest thing on earth._

*******

”So,” Jorge puts the last plates into the dishwasher and turns to face Clara, raising an eyebrow and purposefully dropping his voice. “we could go outside and wait for the fireworks, or-“

”Or?” She smiles at him, knowingly and he melts, like he always does when she’s around, the woman who had finally, after years of restlessness, brought him the stability he’d been craving for, the woman whom he admired for her hands-on approach of life and the easy acceptance of everything life throws in her way.

”Or,” he swallows down the beginnings of a lump in his throat, “we could go upstairs and make our own fireworks.” He moves to stand next to her chair, taking her wine glass and putting it back on the table.

”Actually,” she gets to her feet, takes his hands and leans towards his ear, lips brushing his cheek on their way, electric feeling tingling on his skin now, “I like self-made things… I like them a lot,” she purrs into his ear and he is quick to lift her up now, chuckling at the little squeal.

”Well, I am sure glad you share my position on this,” he says, carrying her up the stairs and into the bedroom, gently letting her down on the mattress.

**New Year’s Eve, Tavullia**  
Nicky feels full, happy and contentedly tired. If it wasn’t for the beginning of a new year, he’d just go to bed. The past week had been beautiful, stressful, painful all at once and when Jorge and Clara had been the last to leave their place a day ago, they had both agreed that they were in dire need of some alone-time now. He leans back in the lounge chair, dropping his cigarette into the ashtray and looking towards the door, Vale just stepping outside to join him, looking just as worn out as he feels. 

”Come join me,” Nicky mumbles, yawning slightly and Vale drops down next to him immediately. 

Nicky cuddles up against the Italian rider, head buried in the black hoodie, inhaling Vale’s smell, shivering under the touch of Vale’s arm draping around his waist right now. Over all those years, Valentino’s arms have become his safe haven, the one place where he will always find comfort and peace and it shows, because while they’re lying there, tangled, chests against each other, their hearts start beating in harmony, their breathing becomes even, the world stops turning.

”If we want to make it to the fireworks, we should go inside and have a coffee,” Vale whispers into his ear, the hot breath tingling him.

Hesitantly, Nicky nods, not really eager to move, but Vale is right, it’s New Year’s Eve and they shouldn’t fall asleep right now. Especially not outside. He takes the Italian’s hand and lets the taller man pull him along, following him inside with a yawn.

*******

Rarely in his life, Vale has felt this nervous before. He does his best to hide it, but his legs are trembling when he guides Nicky towards the kitchen. The American leans against the table and watches him, affection written over his face. It’s long been established that, while Nicky is the better cook, Vale is making their coffee. Always, no exception. American coffee still makes the Italian shudder. He inhales the smell, reminding him of so many things at once, but right now especially their hidden meetings on hotel balcony’s in the early mornings. _Thank goodness that we don’t need those anymore._

Vale pours the black liquid into little cups, adding the usual amount to Nicky’s and hands it over, leaning back against the counter to face Nicky now. Everything inside him is still shaky, his hands are actually openly shaky and coffee is probably the last thing he needs right now, so he puts the cup back, seeing a flicker of confusion on Nicky’s face. The American looks at him expectantly now and Valentino wishes the ground would open and swallow him and immediately realizes how pathetic and cowardly that thought is.

_It’s now or never and I’m not stepping back. I can do this, I really can._ Clumsy fingers reach inside the pocket of jeans, finding the cool piece of metal and when he drops to his knees, his mind goes on autopilot, not really processing anything happening around him anymore, so that he doesn’t consciously see Nicky’s face light up, the American putting away his cup immediately, beaming at the man at his feet with the most affectionate and loving eyes.

”I know we have talked about this and I know you said you wanted to wait until you are retired, but I believe, no, I know that I am ready whenever you are. I want to make this promise to you and I want you to know that I am willing to wait with the ceremony until you are ready, but after all that happened, all that we’ve seen and gone through, I just want you to know that I love you more than anything, more than myself and I need you, because you made my house into my home, you made my heart into my soul and you made my existence into my life. For all of that and more, I want to ask you, Nicky, will you marry me?”

**New Year’s Eve, Switzerland**  
Dani’s head drops to Marc’s shoulder, his eyes resting on the elegant movement of the younger rider’s fingers, amazed at the easiness with which he seems to remember just how to do it. The song is beautiful, somewhat sad and mysterious, kind of matching their overall mood since their return. They’d been overjoyed with Marco and everything in Italy, but the way back, the impending start of 2015 had drawn their thoughts back to reality, to an uncertain future. They’d had a giant fight when Dani, under tears, had confessed to Marc that again, he hadn’t told him the full truth about his medical condition. They’d yelled, slammed doors, cried bitter tears, but they’d at least stayed under the same roof. Nevertheless, the happiness from Tavullia had faded to a memory and they’ve been caught under a haze of worries and silence since then. 

Dani knows it’s his fault, for not sharing with Marc, still trying to be stronger than he actually is, still trying to maintain an image that no longer suits him. The song stops and he lifts his head, meeting Marc’s gaze who is turning around, looking at him with a tentative smile.

”Like it?”

Dani steals a brief kiss before he replies, “Yes, it’s beautiful. What Is it called?”

”The old castle, from Pictures of an Exhibition by Mussorgsky.” Marc presses a peck against his temple. “Glad you like it.”

”I do.” Dani wraps his arms around the taller rider, trying to snuggle into his hoodie, relief that he doesn’t stiffen up under the touch anymore and instead drapes his arms around Dani’s neck, holding him close. 

”I think I’d like to go out for a smoke. Join me?” Marc looks at him expectantly.

Dani nods, wordlessly following the younger out to the terrace, grabbing his jacket on the way.

*******

Marc lights their cigarettes, eyes lost in Dani’s. He loves him, he has done so for so many years, actually. It’s never just been the normal kind of admiring an older rider, there’s always been a bit more to the way he looked at Dani. It’s all the more overwhelming to be standing here with the small man, head on his shoulder, arm around his waist, only weeks before their wedding. And at the same time, it’s scary. So scary, that it takes away the air to breathe, choking him, making him sleepless and restless. It’s not just their argument from the day before. What weighs even heavier on Marc’s heart is Marco and the realization that when they marry, they kind of close that chapter for themselves.

The fear of pulling or pushing Dani into something he never wanted is what overwhelms the young man, because the pattern is obvious in their relationship. Dani wants to go slow, Marc pushes, Dani gives in. And Marc is freaking out over it, suddenly full of insecurity whether Dani gave in because he, Dani himself, changed his mind, or whether he gave in to please Marc. Or, as in the case of their coming out, because Marc just made the step without giving Dani a say in it. 

”Dani?” He hears the older rider hum softly, sound vibrating through his head. “Dani, are you sure we’re doing the right thing?”

His heart is thundering now, coldness spreading inside him, not from the outside but right from his own core, anxiously waiting for a reply.

”I-“ Dani clears his throat and continues, very softly and barely audible. “I don’t really know.”

_We're so close to the flame_   
_burning brightly_


	88. Wicked Game

They end up sitting on the terrace, sharing a lounge chair, facing each other with their legs crossed and a slight gap between them, bottle of wine on the floor next to them, ashtray between their feet and chain smoking. Marc loses himself in the bit of Dani’s eyes that he can see – it’s a black night, light only coming from a couple of candles and a faint solar lamp on Dani’s terrace. And Marc’s thoughts slowly travel back.

He feels it, clear as if it had been yesterday, the yearning, the impossible longing for Dani. It had kind of always been there. When he started in 125cc, Dani had already been his hero for years and of course, Vale is a legend, but somehow, for Marc, Dani has always been a bit more intriguing and the first couple of times he ran into the small man in the paddock changed something else, Dani was not just his hero anymore. Dani, the way he looked, sounded, smelled, had, within an instant, become the first person Marc ever fell in love with. Head over heels, completely, totally, helplessly. Part of him, luckily, a very well-hidden part, behaved like his girly female classmates adoring boy bands. And every time he’d bump into the Honda rider, he’d have to hold his breath and look away quickly, avoiding that the older would see him blush.

Over the years, that situation settled a little, because quite frankly, you could get used to everything, even the longing for someone you most definitely couldn’t have. And avoiding Dani around the place was often rather easy – until 2013. Marc had feared the start of that season, more than any season before, ever, more than his debut season in 2008 and that was not because of the bike – Marc wouldn’t be scared off a bike. It was because Emilio had very early on and enthusiastically told him that Dani Pedrosa would be his teammate and that thought was killing him. Because obviously, avoiding Dani was no longer an option.

Marc takes a drag of his cigarette, eyes wandering over Dani’s face like they have so many times, sting going to his guts, like so many times before, uncertainty of what Dani, who is absentmindedly looking at the few stars visible, really wants from life, from him, from them becoming unbearable for Marc.

In the beginning of 2013, Marc had felt physically sick around Dani and every photo shoot, leave alone the videos, they ever did since then had turned into torture. He did his best to smile his way through it and often came across as giddy, funny, way too playful and childish and later he’d bury his head in his pillows, red from shame and furor over being so immature in front of the man he wanted to impress. And he doesn’t even understand himself why he worried about impressing Dani so much. He was winning a championship in his rookie year, he should have been certain and confident and knowing that he left an impression with Dani – but then, he never felt that way. Whenever Dani came closer, the butterflies in his stomach would take off.

Another cigarette, another swig of wine, a look into the sky and over the lights of all the houses, spreading a somewhat warming, reassuring feeling despite all the coldness. The butterflies never stopped. They’re still there. The realization hits him hard, takes him by surprise, but even with everything that happened, he still hasn’t gotten over them. And that’s the core of the problem, isn’t it? He still feels just as insecure as he did in 2013. A series of moments flashes through his brain, the kiss for the commercial that sparked everything, the first attempt at date and the heartache when Dani pushed him away, Dani appearing in his living room, a curb in Cervera and the demand to be taken to Switzerland, the kitchen counter… the crash and the hospital, their first big fight and finding Dani in his hotel room, the return to Switzerland, the ring, and then that inglorious weekend in Valencia that ended so perfectly. And still, he sits here with Dani and feels the butterflies whenever he looks at Dani.

The question is though, Marc lights yet another cigarette, still staring into the sky, the question is whether the butterflies are a problem. They are a manifestation of the fact that he still loves Dani, just as much as he has done all the time and maybe even more. If he could learn to deal with them a bit better, without questioning Dani, then it could work.

And there really is no reason to doubt Dani, is there? Dani has grown. The series of moments he travelled through shows it clearly. Dani has changed from not even wanting to touch him to devouring him publicly. But then, the vicious circle closes and the initial thoughts pop back into Marc’s head – what if Dani has only done that in order not to disappoint? Not to let down? Or because he didn’t have a choice? Because Dani is quiet, calm, soft-spoken and talking over Dani’s voice is easy at times.

Marc drowns the rest of the red wine and when he just puts the bottle down, feels Dani reach for his hands, holding them tight. His gaze wanders up to meet Dani’s. Even in the dim candle light, he can see the smaller man has been crying and the sight breaks his heart in more than one way, desperate for making Dani sad, absolutely terrified of the things Dani is about to say. When Dani inhales sharply, Marc bites down on his lip hard enough to draw blood and his fingers clench in Dani’s hands.

”Marc, I think I have to explain something to you.”

_What a wicked game to play_   
_to make me feel this way_


	89. Tiger In The Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥  
> I am not sure if writing this on painkillers was a good idea, but I'm not capable of juding right now and I don't want to leave anyone hanging so I'm hoping for the best ;)  
> (Nope, no need to worry about me, I'll be fine, just give it a day ♥)

_I was the one who looked so hard I could not see._  
 _Now I could never live without the love you give to me._

“Okay, let me just-,“ Dani pauses and clears his throat. “Let me try to explain what all of this means, okay?” He sees Marc nod and swallows hard.  
“Before you, I have never, really, never thought of a man in this way. Not one. And when we became teammates and you were usually so distant, I thought of you as an arrogant little fuck and didn’t even look twice. Even when we were sitting in that dressing room, I just kind of looked down on you, thinking you were some kind of homophobic, if you couldn’t even give me a peck. And then, you stood there, and our lips touched and I still think it’s completely unbelievable that something that only lasted a split-second has turned my way upside down so completely. I really, really don’t get it.”  
With a sigh, Dani lights himself a cigarette and stares off in the sky. He should have told Marc so much earlier, but better now than never maybe? He fidgets with the ring on his finger and glances over to the younger man who is looking at him expectantly, somewhere between frowning and curiosity.

_You are the tiger burning bright_  
 _Deep in the forest of my night_  
 _You are the one who keeps me strong in this world_

“Well, I – I didn’t even want to believe I liked it. And you’ve probably figured by now, but Vale pretty much staged our second kiss.” He sees Marc nod and feels his cheeks heat up at the memory of the childish trick. “Well, I had to accept it then. Kissing Vale was weird, but kissing you was perfect. And I started to accept it, I really did. When I woke up in that hospital room and you were there, I wasn’t scared. I should have been scared, especially because I couldn’t feel my arm, but I was never scared because you were there, your face was all that mattered. Even when I buried my career and I was lying there, breaking down in your lap, I always knew I would be okay as long as you were there.”  
Dani stops to take a drag from his cigarette and open another bottle of wine. Shiraz. He blushes at the memory it promotes. Across from him, Marc coughs.  
“Still, I shouldn’t have pushed you.”  
“But you never really did. You only asked for what you deserve. You’re a wonderful person and you deserve the honesty, openness and trust you asked for. And the commitment. Can you believe me that you deserve it?”  
Marc is looking at him with a confused expression and Dani sighs, his fingers reaching out to trace Marc’s jawline, feeling the young man shiver under the touch.  
“You do though, even if you cannot see it yourself. And I want to give it to you and in fact, I’m working on that, very hard. And I know, I just said I wasn’t sure we were doing the right thing.”

Marc cringes and Dani coughs and continues quickly, hands on Marc’s hands now, fingers on Marc’s ring.  
“I don’t know if you are old enough. I am afraid I am taking over your future too soon. I am scared I might hurt your career. And I simply don’t know if what we do is right. I think it’s normal though, it’s the cold feet everybody is talking about in the movies, right? But if you ask me whether I care about the uncertainty, the answer is a definite no. I don’t care. I want you and I want all of you and I want it to be mine, only mine.”  
“Why don’t you trust me then and tell me things?” Marc asks hoarsely, after a pause that lasted an eternity. Dani searches Marc’s gaze, but the younger rider is staring at the sky now, absentmindedly fidgeting with a lighter.  
“It’s not you I don’t trust. It’s me. I doubt my own decisions and my body and I cannot or could not tell you because it hurt to admit that I am not the idol you used to see in my. Because I liked that, you know? And I realize how childish that is, but you have to understand that I have lost so much of my identity… first my sexual identity and then my professional identity. I am struggling with that.”

He looks at Marc, the candlelight making Marc’s face all the more beautiful and mysterious, difficult to read right now. With quite some certainty though he is seeing tears on Marc’s cheeks and he disentangles his hands to cup Marc’s face now, dampness confirming his suspicion. _Oh fuck. I hate hurting you. Why is it so hard to say the right things to you?_ And Dani decides to go for it, getting up and holding a hand out to his confused fiancé.  
“I want to show you something. It was going to be a surprise. Well, it is a surprise, but I was going to save it for another day. Just come along.” Dani blushes, realizing that he is blabbering and nervousness creeps through his body, hoping hard that Marc will approve of what he’s done.  
He drags Marc to the living room and rummages in a drawer, handing over the little card and he watches anxiously when the younger rider reads it, studies the way his expressions change over the words, ending with a frown, but then lifting his head and beaming.

“Dani, you told them.”  
Dani nods, biting his lower lips.  
“You really told your family. Wow.”  
Dani shivers, the fear of revealing their not very catholic plans to his conservative family still buried deep and he feels Marc close the gap between them, card dropped carelessly.  
“I’m so sorry for what they wrote but I’m so glad you’ve told them.”  
Marc’s head drops to his shoulder and he is most certainly sobbing into the fabric of Dani’s hoodie. Rarely, has Dani felt so overwhelmed, unsure how to deal with things and his arms tentative reach around Marc, holding him.

_All of my life I never knew_  
 _You were the dream I'd see come true_

Nuzzling his head into Marc’s hair, he mumbles, “Do you believe me that I want you, more than anything?”  
He feels the younger rider nod against his shoulder and sighs with relief.  
“You already have all of me.” Marc whispers softly, his words, spoken so solemnly, with so much sincerity, making Dani tremble.  
He guides them to the couch, sitting down facing each other and reaches out to touch Marc’s face again, Marc mirroring the move, the light touch of Marc’s fingers burning Dani’s skin and sending a sting to his gut. Their gazes are locked, intensely, pupils almost black.  
Slowly, very slowly, Dani leans forward and from the corner of his almost closed eyes, notices that Marc is still following his moves, doing the same. Their lips meet and with a lightning bold that hits Dani from head to toe, he realizes that it still feels like their first kiss, the same fascination, the same instant feeling of pure bliss, admiration, love. His hands move into Marc’s hair, at the same time feeling Marc’s fingers in his, shivering under the gentle touch. Their lips part at the same second, tongues tentatively meeting, teasing, playing.

It’s a game of hide and seek, an exploration of each other that they haven’t done that intensely for a while and Dani wishes it would never stop. He trembles when they break their kiss and he pulls Marc’s hoodie off. The younger man does the same with his, brushing his sides all but accidentally. His eyes wander over Marc’s chest, perfect, broad, muscular chest and he leans forward again, their foreheads touching, his fingers tracing lines on Marc’s torso, enjoying the gooseflesh and the shivers.

Still slow but with determination, he slips his hands under the waistband of Marc’s jeans and Marc understands the hint, getting up to allow him to take them down, belt hitting the wooden floor with a thump. Marc pulls him up as well, again mirroring his moves, until their naked in front of each other, body heat radiating between them. _You’re incredibly gorgeous._ Dani almost holds his breath, fingers again exploring Marc’s body.  
He steps closer, no longer a gap between them, his cock against Marc’s now.  
“Feel what you’re doing to me?” He hisses, their eyes still locked, Marc’s black with desire when he nods now.  
Dani kisses Marc again, but only briefly, then letting his mouth wander down on Marc’s body, licking over the sensitive throat, sucking bruises on his collarbones, moving to nibble his nipples, Marc trembling and shivering, hands in Dani’s hair now and he has no intention to stop, licking his way down to Marc’s bellybutton and dropping to his knees, mouth finding Marc’s tip.

Some months ago, _this_ , Dani blowing another man, had been beyond his own imagination and now it was the most beautiful thing in the world, having control over Marc, treating him, spoiling him, devouring him, feeling him shake and break and unravel under his touch, that was just pure bliss. In the middle of his living room, Dani’s knees on the hard floor, Marc comes down his throat with a shudder and a low growl, hands pulling on Dani’s hair painfully and they rest a moment, Marc panting heavily, before the younger man moves, spent cock dropping from Dani’s mouth.  
“You have me, remember?” A low, hoarse and breathless growl and Marc pulls him into an embrace, lips crashing violently this time, sounds obscene, the younger man still shuffling, moving, pulling on him until they’ve fallen to the couch, Dani on top, Marc’s hips jerking against him.  
Spit as lube is not a novelty, but Marc is still wincing tonight and Dani’ knows that he’s oversensitive and hurting right now and he tries to stop but Marc just frowns at him and pulls him back, so he complies, trying to open Marc as carefully as possible, but with limited success. When he withdraws his fingers, slowly replacing them with his cock, he hears Marc inhale sharply but then he finds the right angle, the other screaming with every thrust, cock hard already again – advantage of the youth – and bucking back against Dani’s move. Dani’s mind is no longer coherent now, he is losing himself on a happy cloud, surrounded by Marc’s feel, Marc’s touch, Marc’s smell, eaten alive by the wonderful way in which Marc clenches around him and when he wraps his fingers around Marc’s cock, he knows how to time it so that they come together and they match the exact moment, when the fireworks start outside.

They stay collapsed onto each other on the couch, wrapped in a duvet, slightly breathless and Dani snuggled into Marc’s arms, feeling safe and sheltered there.  
“I love you,” Dani whispers, “You know that, right?”  
“Yes,” Marc nods against his shoulder again. “Yes, I know that. And I hope you know that I love you, too.”  
“You know,” Dani says absentmindedly, after they’ve been sitting in silence for a while, “when I’m with you, I think I don’t need my career to define myself anymore. Having you is all that matters right now.”


	90. There Goes The Fear

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To everybody who worried and sent their wishes and just everything: Thank you so much ♥ ♥ ♥  
> I'm okay and shall be recovering soonish. Been there before and know the deal ;)

**February 2015, Cervera**

“Can you really believe they’re doing it?” Roser’s head leans against Julia’s shoulder, her eyes lost in a photo on their wall, showing Marc, at the age of four, on his first bike. 

Julia shrugs slightly, an arm wrapped around his wife’s waist, feeling her shuffle even closer. “I don’t know. Somehow, it always feels like he’s still four and then I look at him and I feel as if he is already older than me. So, sometimes, yes, I totally believe they’re doing this and other days, I feel it’s just impossible.”

She nods against him, knowing exactly what he’s talking about.

”Can you believe what Dani’s parents wrote them?” Julia struggles to keep the anger from her voice, still furious about that card Marc showed her the other day.

”No, I cannot.” Julia shakes his head and she hears the sadness and resignation in his voice. “I could not call my son any of the words they mentioned and I couldn’t give up on either of them, no matter what they did.”

Roser nods, humming approvingly, both of them falling silent for a bit, eyes still wandering over framed pictures of their sons, more than twenty years of memories gathered on one wall.

”What do you think, will they make it?”

”Yes,” Julia’s answer comes quickly, quicker than she expected, “they will be fine. Everything will.”

After a moment, his hand squeezing her hip reassuringly, she tentatively asks, voice almost failing her, “What makes you so sure?”

”Have you ever seen the way they look at each other when they think the other doesn’t notice? It’s unbelievable. I have never seen Marc – or Dani – look at anything else with so much affection and dedication as they have for each other, not even their bike.”

And that means a lot and Roser knows and now that Julia points her to it, she realizes he’s been right all along and she also realizes just where his inner calm comes from.

Leaning on her tiptoes, pressing a peck to his cheek, she wraps her arm around his neck and smiles at him apologetically.

”I’m sorry, I think I did you wrong.”

”What do you mean?” Julia looks at her, face full of confusion.

”You are the one who is better at emotional things. Way better than I ever will.”

*******

“Alex, you can come in.” 

Alex carefully opens the door to his old room, now their bedroom. He’d been, no, they’d been reluctant to accept his parents offer to move into their house. In the end though, with Marta wishing to go back to studying, even if at Zaragoza and not Barcelona and with Alex gone a lot, it’s the most practical solution. And Marc’s room is now Marco’s room and everything is pretty nice. 

Holding his breath, he steps inside, jaw dropping at the sight.

“Oh my God. You look amazing!” He presses it out breathlessly, hardly able to think coherently anymore, his eyes on Marta and his brain on overload.

She’s looking gorgeous, simply gorgeous and now he knows what a breathtaking view really looks like because there is no way he is remembering how to do breathing right now, standing across the mother of his child, in a gorgeous, deep blue dress, tight on her upper body, revealing a bit of her cleavage, admittedly especially amazing and stunning right now thanks to Marco and the dress hugs her hips, only widening slightly around the knees. Her pale skin, eyes the same color as the dress and golden curls, the only word he can find to describe is angelic. And part of him admits that while it is frowned upon to look down on a woman who loses her body over pregnancy and giving birth, he is honestly relieved that Marta has her own figure back, well actually, a slightly improved body, counting the new cleavage. 

His eyes find hers and her face turns into the most radiant smile.

“So, what do you think? This one tomorrow?”

”Well,” Alex tries for his most evil grin, “only if I get to take it off you. With my teeth.”

And if he’d thought she couldn’t look any more gorgeous, she is now proving him wrong when her cheeks blush and she bursts into a tiny, teeny-like giggle.

”Alex?” She wraps herself around him, hands in his neck, lips against his neck, hot breath on his skin, fabric of her dress rustling against his clothes. 

”Hm?” He nuzzles his head in his hair.

”Do you think they’ll be okay?”

It almost sweeps him off his sweet, the genuine care and affection in her voice, the genuine fear and worry for her friends and he squeezes her, trying to comfort her, hold her, give her back the trust in love that he is well aware he made her lose himself.

”If they don’t make it, then I don’t know anyone who would. I’ve never seen Marc like that with anyone else and I don’t think Dani has ever let anyone so far into his private life as he lets Marc.” He nods against her head. “Yeah, they’ll be fine.”

*******

“No way, you’re not staying in the same room the night before your wedding.” Clara stares at them in disbelief.

Dani cringes. “We’re not that traditional.”

“Oh yes, you are!” Vale. Of course. Vale would say something like that, smirking devilishly.

“You know, why don’t we just make it so that Marc stays with you guys,” Jorge says, also with a dirty grin, “And Dani stays with us?”

And Dani and Marc look at each other, a bit desperate but also well aware that resistance is futile.

“Guys, I really don’t think it’s necessary,” Marc makes a feeble attempt, but the others won’t have that, all four of them immediately pointing out the bad luck that would bring their marriage.

“Okay then, see you tomorrow, I love you!” Dani pulls Marc into a hug, pressing a last kiss to his cheek, the younger man whispering a soft, “Love you, too” into his ear and then being dragged away by Vale.

*******

“Why did you do that?” Dani looks at Jorge over a glass of wine, Clara having vanished surprisingly, spending the night with Marta, Alex and his soon-to-be parents in law. 

“Didn’t want the two of you to get your feet too cold.”

Dani cringes, memories from Switzerland still fresh in his head. He nods slowly. “I see. Well, you’ve got a point there, I suppose.”

“Why? Are you in doubt?”

“Always.” Dani sighs, sees Jorge frown and quickly adds, “Don’t worry, I’ll do it. I want to do it. I’m just scared.”

Dani hears Jorge chuckle and raises an eyebrow. “What’s so funny?”

“Sorry,” Jorge takes a deep breath, trying hard to suppress his laughter, “but after flying from your bike at 300 km/h, waking up with your arm almost gone, coming out to millions of people, kissing Marc on TV and announcing the end of your career it’s kind of funny that saying yes to a man that you so obviously love still scares you… well, I find that quite hilarious actually.”

While Dani lets the chain of thoughts run through his head, a tentative smile twitches around his lips. _Jorge Lorenzo, you’re damned right on this one._

”Jorge?” It’s late, very late and they’re both leaning over the railing of the balcony, lost in thoughts.

”Hm?”

With a cough, Dani clears his throat. “Do you think Marc is ready?” 

*******

”So,” Marc leans back on one of the queen size beds in the room, splaying his legs, arms under his head, “why are you holding me captive here?”

”Well, you know,” Nicky sits down on the other bed, facing him with a serious look now. “We just wanted to make sure.”

”You don’t trust us?” Marc contemplates, small smile around his mouth because he actually quite appreciates that his friends worry so much about them and just wants to tease Nicky for a bit. From the bathroom, he hears the water of the shower still running and wonders if neither Vale nor Nicky really care about his presence in their, well, private space, their kind of intimacy. Then, something different catches his attention and he props himself up, reaching for Nicky’s hand.

”You’ve got a ring. Mister Hayden, you are wearing an engagement ring and you did not even bother to send a message?” Marc feigns indignation and pouts dramatically. “Boy, that hurts! I thought we were friends.”

Nicky stares at the ring, as if it still surprises himself. 

”Sorry, yes, I am. Vale gave it to me.”

Marc chuckles at the statement of the obvious and the American cringes and stutters, “I- we- , we are going to get married next year, after my retirement.”

”Congratulations!” Marc is beaming, overjoyed, happy for his friends and when Vale joins them, only in his boxers and apparently not the least bit concerned with shame as he is obviously considering Marc part of his family by now, they celebrate, they chat and they drink. There are a few brief moments where reality comes back to Marc’s head and every time, Vale or Nicky say just the right thing then to take his thoughts to something else and he realizes what a great jobs his friends are doing here, only to keep him distracted and somewhat occupied.

Towards the end of the night, conversations start dragging, all of them more hanging than sitting and that’s when the doubts crawl back into Marc’s system. They’ve already gone to bed, Vale and a peacefully collapsed, snoring Nicky wrapped around each other in one, Marc on his back on the other, when the younger rider suddenly clears his throat.

”Vale?”

”Hm?”

”Do you think Dani is ready?”

_Close your eyes, lay down_  
 _'Cause there goes the fear_  
 _Let it go_


	91. My Life Is Right

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥ ♥ ♥  
> The reason, the core, the meaning, the soul of this story. And I hated writing it because it basically means I'm done. So with a happy and a crying face at the same time... I'm taking the plunge.  
> Thank you for everything and no, I haven't messed up counting but the last two chapters are the ones that have been ready from the start, so I kind of feel weird today already. Hope you'll enjoy ♥

_You give me light_  
 _You are my day_  
 _You give me life_  
 _And that's right_

**February 2015**

_”We didn’t fall in love at first sight, I know that and so do you. We’ve talked about this and the truth is, I didn’t even look at you in the beginning. I was pretty stupid, wasn’t I? And then someone made us kiss. And a certain Italian made us repeat that kiss. And I’ve fallen head over heels._

_I learned from you over those past months. How to tease your little brother, how to eat an entire pizza without even cutting it into slices, how to get your mother to do your laundry even when you’re over twenty… seriously though, you taught me how to be myself, believe in myself and stand up for myself. You taught me that I can be me without shame. That it is okay to have fun without thinking about the consequences – as long as you know when to return to serious business. You showed me that I am stronger than I ever thought I would be._

_And you kept me alive. Those past months would have killed me if it hadn’t been for you. You’ve always been there, to hold me, catch me, comfort me. You have been there in my darkest hours, holding me, keeping me together, warming me when I thought the world was freezing over. It is incredible – and often well hidden – just how old your inner self is, because most people know your cheery side, your passionate side, but you do not let many people in on your dark side, the part of you where you remember how it feels to lose everything. I keep forgetting about that, too, and I hope you can forgive me, I hope you can bear with me through all these times where I don’t give you full credit for who you really are inside._

_Marc, I love you and I cannot tell you enough and I want to give you all that you deserve. I vow to try my hardest for the rest of my life to give you all that you deserve and more, to be truthful and loyal, trusting and supportive, loving and caring, gentle and sweet, passionate and affectionate. I promise to be there for you at your best and at your worst, in the dark and in the light, during the day and during the night. I love you with all of my heart and my soul I will do so until the end of my days.”_

*******

_”I have always, always admired you, ever since I saw you race for the first time. And somewhere along the way, the child that has adored you has turned into a teenager craving you and finally an adult loving you. I didn’t want to kiss you during that photo shoot, it was a moment to avoid at all cost, because I never dared to hope you’d return my feelings and I thought that once I’d get to know the feeling of your lips on mine, I would never be able to live without it ever again. And I was right. That moment has blown me away._

_Luckily, I was also wrong, because you did, eventually, return my feelings and I didn’t have to go without you anymore. Although, when you crashed, I sure feared that I would have to. I cannot explain or put into words how I felt then, seeing you in that gravel, not moving. I don’t remember anything but pain and the lack of air and the certainty that I had to be there. And I did something incredibly stupid that turned out to be the best thing I have ever done in my life when I stopped next to you and let the world see what I feel for you._

_Because it turned out that the world is a much better place than we expected. Because it turned out that, despite some cracks, the announcement of our relationship really hasn’t done much damage to our lives and I never ever want to go back into hiding, because sharing my luck and joy with everybody has been wonderful and because kissing you whenever I want to is amazing and because you finally took me out on my first date and it was perfect._

_I am incredibly proud that I could teach you something after all, as you are the single-most important person in my life and you have taught me more than anyone else about love and understanding, about respect and support. You said that I have been there in your darkest hour, but I remember that there was a moment where I wasn’t and it’s the most despicable, shameful moment of my life, my biggest downfall. I am grateful you forgave me and I promise that I will never do that again._

_Dani, I vow that I will be there, from now until forever, that I will never leave your side, that I will never forget that whatever you do or say you are my man, my love, my soulmate and my best friend and that I will allow you to fight, to talk to me, to argue with me instead of being a coward and running away. You are the light of my life and with this, I vow to you that I will give you the best of me at all times, that I will love you, honor you and support you in good and bad times now and forever.”_

*******

_“Marc, you have given us, Nicky and me, the greatest gift that we could ever have received and we never properly thanked you so I want to do it tonight. Thank you for making us come out of our hiding place, thank you for turning our lives upside down. It’s been a change for the better in every aspect and we are proud that after your brave and selfless gesture, we have learned from you to follow that example. Out of the four of us, you’re the youngest, but at times, you are also the wisest, thank you for that._

_Dani, your spirit, your mind, your easy acceptance of your fate and the changes in your life have been inspiring for all of us and I want to thank you for allowing us to see a side of you we didn’t know before._

_Marc and Dani, we are proud to have been around from the very beginning. I am especially proud to have seen one of the very first moments of truth between you when I finally got you two kiss each other properly and although you needed an occasional push from us in the beginning, you quickly caught up and outgrown us, just like you do on track and you’ve moved on to be a truly great example of love and acceptance. Thank you for letting us in and we wish you the very best of everything, the brightest, most beautiful future you can imagine, that all your dreams come true and that you never lose yourselves or your beautiful bond with each other._

*******

_Marc, you are the best older brother I could have wished for and you’ve saved my neck more than once this past season. And Dani, you’ve become a great friend and I can never thank you enough for what you’ve done for Marta and Marco. And I assume, now that Marc no longer needs to maintain Spanish residency for your marriage, that you will finally pick up your last stuff from the house and give us some space._

_For the future, I hope for the two of you that fate will be a bit more gentle with you in the future, that you can return to find your challenges on track instead of at home and that you will keep having that incredible love between the two of you for the rest of your lives. I have never seen another couple that looks at each other the way you do and I hope you can keep that. And I have never seen a couple that can communicate so many things without a single word. Please, for the sake of my own mental health, be happy and loving and just make your marriage the best of all times, because if you wouldn’t last, you’d break my faith in love._

*******

There are those scenes during a wedding, that you never forget. Images, that last a lifetime in your head. And they kind of blend into one another like one of the cheesy collages that you sometimes see in the movies. There are Emilio and Alberto, joint at the bar, drink together heavily and sharing their sorrows about their favorite drivers’ antics and whereabouts, both slurring and almost falling from their seats and Alberto kindly steadying Emilio when they leave for a taxi.

There is Santi and Uccio, talking animatedly, discussing soccer, laughing, drinking and enjoying themselves. Exchanging anecdotes and playing with Uccio’s daughter and Alex’s son, eyes beaming. Two teddy bears united that finally, Uccio’s daughter fast asleep, leave together with their families.

Of course, there is Alex and Marta, sitting at the table with Marco, bursting with pride, Marta looking gorgeous more comfortable with herself than they’ve ever seen her before. There’s Alex and Marta dancing, slowly, beautifully, eyes locked and finally, finally the affection in their eyes is fully back, the way Marta is looking up at Alex giving away that she has forgiven and it earns her all of their respect, because neither of them is sure he could do the same.

There is Roser crying, comforted by Julia, both of their faces beaming, their cheeks damp with tears. These are parents that have had more occasions to be proud of their eldest son than most others and still they are touched deeper than ever when they see him grow up in front of their eyes. They share a dance later as well, a beautiful waltz, Roser’s head against Julia’s shoulder and her smile for him as tender and loving as during their own wedding, making Marc and Dani pray silently, that they will make it to this point in their lives with the same amount of grace.

There’s images of Jorge and Clara and Nicky and Vale, dancing, sharing loving looks and sweet kisses. There’s Vale and Nicky close to tears when they look at Marc and Dani’s wedding bands, sharing that look of disbelief that says _”wow, only a year and this will be us”_. There’s a beaming Clara in Jorge’s arm and an affectionate smile from Jorge for his girl, a warmth and joy that they have never seen on the Majorcan before. And there’s Vale, holding Marco, tears streaming down the Italian’s face and that’s certainly an image they will never forget.

The deepest memories however, that they take with them, are the ones they share during this night. Dani will never forget the anxious feeling of standing there, waiting for Marc and then seeing him, brought by Vale and Nicky, looking breath-taking in the dark grey suit – they picked matching suits together, but it’s still taking his breath away to see the result now. The relief washing over them that Marc didn’t run and the look on Marc’s face that confirms that the young rider feels exactly the same way. And Marc will never forget their first dance, that moment when their hands clasped and they started to move, dancing a bit of tango to a song of Piazolla, a song that they both remember as the soundtrack to the moment that changed their lives. A song, that he played when Dani’s head appeared in his living room in Cervera, when a young moto GP rider from Sabadell had finally made the most important decision of his life. 

It’s after midnight, the cake has been cut and eaten, when they decide to head back to the hotel, exchanging teary goodbyes with the guests who are still around and walking outside, hands clasped tightly. They smoke a last, wordless cigarette on the pavement before they fall into a taxi, both on the backseat, fingers laced again and Dani’s head on Marc’s shoulder. And Dani’s eyes light up ever so brightly, when Marc turns his head to whisper into the smaller rider’s ear. “I am so ready for the finale now.”

_At the first kiss I felt something melt inside me that hurt in an exquisite way. All my longings, all my dreams and sweet anguish, all the secrets that slept deep within me came awake, everything was transformed and enchanted, everything made sense._  
 _~Hermann Hesse_


	92. Straight To You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, the night of all nights. It's been one of the first things I wrote and I edited only a few bits tonight and I miss them already.  
> Thank you all for everything ♥  
> Tomorrow shall be finals day.

They enter the hotel room and Marc feels the nervousness flash through his veins, feels his legs tremble while they pass the door. It shuts behind them, after Dani gave it a push and the thud makes Marc jump. This is it. They’re here, they’re married. It’s the night of all nights – and his heart is thundering in his chest. His gaze has dropped to the floor, but he feels Dani move closer until there is no gap left between them anymore, Dani’s breath against his neck, suits rustling against each other. 

“You’re mine now.” 

Dani whispers it straight into his ear, lips brushing his skin. At the meaning of the words, the hair in Marc’s neck stands up straight and shivers run down his body, while he nods. Slowly. Tentatively. Incredulously. _So difficult to believe just yet._ Marc’s eyes shut when he feels Dani’s hands around his neck, thumbs rubbing against his jaw and he melts into the touch, mind focusing only on Dani’s finger tips against his skin, feeling the electricity sting through him in little ripples. His own fingers clench in Dani’s shirt and he notices the copper taste of blood lingering in his mouth, realizing that he’s been biting down on his lip hard, suppressing a moan, when Dani pressed their chests flush against each other, backing him up against the door. As usual, Marc’s legs spread automatically, just the right amount to compensate for the height difference, their crotches against each other now. 

Gently, hardly touching him, Dani’s fingertips keep brushing over the sensitive skin in Marc’s neck and he cannot count the shivers that are running down his spine anymore. It feels so good, so relaxing and he has lost any feeling of time or space, all the memories and myriads of impressions from the day have faded out, the situation only leaving room for Dani on his mind. Soft lips hover over his mouth, barely kissing him and his lips part eagerly, inviting Dani to come closer, give him more, but he doesn’t do him the favor quite yet. Instead, Dani’s breath is soon hot against Marc’s ear again, scorching him.

“Ready?”

A lump forms in Marc’s throat, his heart jumping and blood rushing in his head. He swallows determinedly and nods, opening his eyes again, finding Dani’s look on him, eyes dark with lust but also still hesitant, questioning.

“I am ready.”

It comes out hoarse, but his voice stays steady and Marc closes his eyes again. He’s agreed to it and that makes a sudden, unexpected calmness spread through his veins, makes him relax under Dani’s touch, soft fingertips travelling between his neck and hairline. A soft hum falls from Marc’s parted lips and he feels Dani’s hands move lower, deliberately rubbing over his sides until the smaller man’s arms rest possessively around the younger’s waist. Then, Dani’s lips meet his, finally, gently, tongue only exploring tentatively. At the same time, Dani starts moving, shoving both of them towards the bed.

It’s a gorgeous dark iron bed, with a headboard full of ornaments and Marc cannot help but wonder if Dani picked the hotel because of the bed. The sheets are immaculate light grey satin, certainly costly, feeling luxurious – at least if they’re like the ones in the room he’d shared with Vale and Nicky last night. Dani stops when Marc’s legs bump against the back of the mattress and Dani’s hands slowly start undressing him, sliding of the jacket carelessly, opening button by button, planting a soft, intriguing kiss or lick on every inch of skin he unveils and Marc trembles helplessly, his body craving for more, more, more with unknown urgency. 

The shirt falls with a soft rustling and the cool air on his torso makes Marc shudder, Dani’s tongue licking over his navel. He feels Dani take away the belt, he feels Dani’s fingers over his bulge, pressing teasingly, Marc’s hips jerking forward involuntary in response. With his teeth, Dani pulls down the zipper, fingers helping Marc out of shoes and socks and finally pants and boxers, then tracing a line up from his ankles along the insides of his thighs to his already hard cock and Marc clings to Dani’s hair to steady himself, a needy moan escaping his lips.

Dani is still dressed, his clothes are pressing against Marc’s body and he feels strange, naked, on display like this but he doesn’t move, doesn’t open his eyes, shivering under the sudden sensation of silky fabric over his eyes. 

“Blindfold, okay?” Dani’s voice, directly to his ear, words directly to his groin and Marc’s mouth goes dry while he nods.

With an approving nod, Dani’s hands push him into the splendid sheets, guiding him around the bed and then he’s straddling him, sitting on Marc’s chest and taking his wrists, thumbs rubbing little circles. Marc knows, but still he cannot help the shuddering.

“You okay?”

Dani must have noticed the trembling. Marc nods though. He is okay, he really is, just nervous and excited. Cold metal wraps around his bones, his arms pulled over his head and the little click goes straight to his lap, his cock twitching excitedly. Dani moves again, the mattress dips and Marc is left to himself, feeling weird, still too much on display, too vulnerable. 

The deprivation of his vision makes his other senses more aware so that he is drowning in the mix of Dani’s scent and that of the hotel’s laundry detergent. His skin notices the very slight breeze of cool air hovering over his body, making his hair stand up and his ears listen closely, closer than usual, realizing that Dani must be stripping. Sounds of rustling and a zipper, a belt dropping to the floor and then a moment of silence. A brief, scratchy sound, possibly a lighter? Steps shuffle, something is put on the bedside table and he smells a faint hint of burn. Probably a candle. More steps, the door of a cupboard, something else goes on the bedside table. The clicking of a camera makes his head jerk up, hands fighting the restraints.

“Sorry, couldn’t resist. God, you look gorgeous.”

Marc feels himself blush, head to toes. A few more steps and then the mattress dips. A wave of Dani’s smell washes over him, breath-taking and arousing. Next, the fingertips are back, tracing lines from his elbows to his torso and over his chest down to his stomach, always stopping right before his groin, not even accidentally touching it. He’s squirming in the restraints, hips bucking up tentatively, searching for any kind of friction they could get and his entire skin is in gooseflesh now. 

Dani’s lips brush over his, tentatively, teasingly. He tries to poke out his tongue, to catch them, but doesn’t make it. 

“Dani, please.” He sounds needy and desperate, whimpering already.

“I hope to hear that a lot more tonight.” Dani’s voice is growling into his hair, Dani’s fingers playing with his nipples now, pinching just a little, not yet painful. The light and feathery touches return, his body shivering under Dani and something in his head snaps, surrenders, give in to the situation, floating in the relaxing feeling of having no control and nothing to worry about.

Memories run through his mind, memories from their first kiss, the scorching, burning feeling that stayed imprinted on his lips for weeks after, memories of their second kiss, the unbearable jealousy when Dani kissed Vale, the blissful moment when Dani’s lips parted and Dani’s fingers reached his neck. It feels both like it happened just yesterday and like it’s been years ago. 

Right now, Dani’s lips return to hover over his face and then they stay, pressed against his, parted, tongue approaching his and they share one of those lazy, languid kisses that they learned to appreciate over time, a kiss without any time constraints, without any battles for the upper hand.

It’s not long until they are both moaning into the kiss and he feels the sheen of sweat on Dani’s skin, drowns in Dani’s scent, wants nothing more than wrap his arms around the other and hold him close. It really is a blissful torture, lying here, at Dani’s mercy, waiting and floating. Marc’s head makes its way back to their first time, or first times if rutting against each other like horny teenagers counts. The real first time, in his head at least, will always be the one on the kitchen counter. He can still feel the coolness against his forehead, the needy and anxious time of waiting for Dani to finally breach him and that moment where they were one. Dani had been so scared of hurting him then. Marc breaks the kiss, releasing a whimper towards Dani who is pinching his nipples again. _He’s definitely over that fear now._

Dani’s lips are gone completely and he seems to be doing something reaching for something. Next thing Marc knows is a sting, a burning pain on his chest that makes him squeal, followed by Dani’s fingers around his cock, tugging firmly and making him growl. His head is spinning from overload and confusion and he inhales sharply when Dani lets go, finger’s tracing a line over Marc’s chest, around the spot where it hurt.

”Wax,” he hears the breathless whisper. “More?”

Biting his lip, but far too intrigued by the mix of pain and pleasure in his head, Marc nods, holding his breath and bracing himself for the next. Dani lets him wait a bit, fingers absentmindedly drawing patterns over his sides, sending more and more shivers through his shuddering, writhing body and then it happens, catching him off guard again, leaving him fighting the restraints and in between a wince and a growl, Dani’s free hand playing with his balls now. Dani repeats the play, over and over, until Marc’s body is entirely covered in sweat and he feels completely lost on waves of painful pleasure that wash over his body.

The dipping movements of the mattress tell him that Dani is changing something and as much as he tries, his ears cannot figure out what his husband is doing and he is left helplessly shivering, nervousness spreading again. His head replays scenes from La Jonquera and an airplane, reminding him how fast they have become adventurous, how soon Dani got over his inhibitions. Feeling the hood of the car under him again, he releases a wanton noise just at the memory.

It’s again the movement of the mattress that tells him Dani is back and he feels fingernails scrape over his torso, removing the rest of the wax. The fingers move downward and Dani moves between his legs, spreading them further with a gentle touch against the inside of Marc’s thighs and Marc almost blushes at the needy noises he is already making. Suddenly, he feels Dani’s lips around his cock and in response, arches his back desperately, sounding even more wanton now.

Teasingly, Dani licks along his length and the moans turn into wincing, the writhing becomes frantic and his hips buck up uncontrollably. With a firm grip, Dani holds him back down on the soft sheets and keeps up the teasingly slow pace until he finally swallows Marc down, resulting in one of those strings of swears falling from his mouths that he would normally blush dark red for. One thing is for sure, Dani knows what he’s doing and Marc’s body fights the restraints, squirming helplessly, unbearable tension building up inside him.

”Close.” He manages to press it out with a last bit of breath and Dani stops cold, making him wince with disappointment and gasp helplessly. “Fuck, Dani. Please.”

”I told you I want to hear that some more,” Dani whispers and Marc can just about imagine the dirty smirk that goes with the words.

Then, Dani’s lips are back, closing around his tip and he is squirming and growling. Dani repeats the procedure twice more before at the third try, when Marc has long lost any ability of coherent thinking leave alone speaking, he finally lets him come, back arching, hips bucking, his orgasm crashing over him like a volcanic explosion, loud, animalistic scream coming from the back of his throat and he collapses back onto the now somewhat sweaty sheets, panting heavily, head spinning, body drained. 

He can feel Dani lying next to him, fingers resting on his chest before the older man leans in for a kiss, letting him taste himself on his lips. And then Dani’s fingers are back on his cock and he squeals from oversensitivity, hands immediately fighting the restraints again.

”Dani, no.” He shakes his head wildly, but Dani silences him with a kiss.

”Trust me, you can do it.”

Dani’s lips move down his throat and Marc bites down his already swollen lips again, drawing some more blood. He tries to brace himself when he hears the cap of the tube. He feels the cool, slick finger in his crease, making him shudder and as much as he tried to prepare and hold his breath, he winces loudly when Dani pushes forward, relentlessly, making his way past Marc’s tight muscles.

With his body in shivering convulsions and his breath coming in small, desperate pants, he lets Dani continue, one hand on his cock that is slowly and painfully building up again, the fingers of the other hand spreading him, agonizingly leisurely as well. It’s a complete overload, but Dani stays right, he can do it and the pain gradually dissolves, turning into burning desire once again and by the time Dani’s fingers curl to hit his prostate, his back is arching again and the wanton sounds have returned to his vocabulary, sometimes replaced by low, guttural moans.

”Dani, fuck, please.”

”As you are asking so kindly…”

Dani’s voice is hoarse and breathless now as well, the man’s breathing more desperate for a while already and their lips crash while Dani’s hand withdraws, immediately replaced by his cock, sharp burn going through Marc’s body at the relentless thrust. And Dani does not give him time to accommodate tonight, falling into a fast rhythm right away, pushing into Marc hard. It takes Marc a moment to catch up, process all the feelings and get relaxed enough to actually enjoy, his hips finally bucking up to meet Dani’s thrusts. 

They’ve been kissing messily all throughout, lips swollen, bitten, covered in saliva, until the urgency and exhaustion makes them break apart, both of them panting, moaning and swearing. Marc writhes under Dani and Dani’s fingers move back to his groin, letting him thrust into his palm. And they don’t last long, neither of them and Marc is eternally grateful that Dani doesn’t tease anymore, instead, they both come almost at the same second, room filled with loud growls, their bodies collapsing with a shudder and then complete silence, only sounds their heavy breathing. _The night of all nights. Definitely._

Marc is almost dozing off when Dani pulls out and then wipes him clean with a warm, soft cloth, trying hard not to make him wince from oversensitivity again. He is still very distant and feels things through a haze when Dani frees his hands, rubbing his wrists and then the blindfold is removed, leaving Marc blinking against the light of what seems like hundreds of candles.

”Congratulations.” Dani reaches over to the nightstand, handing him a glass of champagne and Marc sits up on the sheets, still blinking a bit, giving the smaller rider an incredulous look.

”Wow.” It’s all the words he manages right now, voice hoarse, throat dry and head blank.

Smiling tentatively, he reaches out for the glass and they clink their glasses. The champagne is the best in his life, beating that on the podiums by length and he cuddles up against Dani’s side, Dani’s arm possessively around his waist, heads against each other. He wants to drown in Dani’s smell and touch right now. It’s a moment that shouldn’t have to end and surprisingly, it seems that it doesn’t for a while. Until finally, the last drops are gone and Dani puts the glasses back, reaching for Marc’s hand. They stay there, wordless for a bit more, until Dani clears his throat.

“You trust me.”

Marc nods against Dani shoulder, head nuzzled in the nape of Dani’s neck, lacing their fingers in front of Dani’s chest. _I do._

_Heaven has denied us its kingdom_   
_The saints are drunk howling at the moon_   
_The chariots of angels are colliding_   
_Well, I'll run, babe, but I'll come running_   
_Straight to you_   
_For I am captured_   
_Straight to you_   
_For I am captured_   
_One more time_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is by Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds. Me, the song and this chapter have a very special relationship ♥


	93. El Mar No Cesa - The Sea Has No End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for following me over two months, more than 100,000 words and 93 chapters. During this time, I've sprained my wrist, broken up with my boyfriend, wrecked a car, received my Master's degree, broken three ribs and won two races and now that it's over I simply cannot believe it. I have no words to express how much the feedback has meant to me, how overwhelmed I am with everything or how much I loved writing this. It's been the most personal and private thing I've ever revealed about me.
> 
> I wish I could say that there's going to be something new, but right now, I'm not sure what I'll do about writing. I'll finish the two stories around here that I started already and then I'll make a decision.
> 
> Thank you for everything, it was wonderful!
> 
> And now, meet the first chapter I ever wrote for this story, more than 60 days ago. I've resisted any temptation to change a thing about it and here it is now, in all its imperfection...

_y por fin he encontrado el camino/ and finally I found the way..._

**2015, First Race**

They’ve booked a restaurant table for eight and Dani realizes with surprise, that they haven’t been together as a group since their wedding. With testing in different teams, the start of sponsor events and promotion, the occasions had been rare. Not that they’d been out of touch. With Nicky as Marc’s teammate the information has always been passed along, but it’s not the same. With a broad smile he sinks into the chair next to his husband’s, fingers laced on the table immediately and tunes in to the playful banter around them, happy to see everybody and the disappointment of not being here as an active rider kept away at arm’s length.

*******

Vale revels in the company of his surrogate family. Among their group, he has a feeling of belonging there, of having found his place in life, that he has been missing for too long. His eyes wander over everybody, slowly, with affection and pride. Marta is glowing, that much is for sure. She has always been cute, but lately, she is gorgeous and when she tells them about Marco, there is that extra spark of joy in her eyes that makes the world around her light up. And Alex, well, after all the troubles he’s caused them, he has adapted into adulthood surprisingly quick, looking five years older this season, way more confident, ready to turn Moto2 upside down. Marc and Dani are perfect as ever, beaming at each other as if they were on their first date and not here as a married couple. Vale’s eyes hover over the wedding bands and travel to Nicky’s hand, engagement ring blinking at him full of promises. _Next year._ Only Jorge and Clara seem a little nervous or restless, not as relaxed, reserved to take part in conversations, smiling a bit too shy for his taste and while he scrutinizes them, his look falls on to the glasses and he knows.

*******

Nicky wonders why Vale is suddenly beaming at Clara, the woman blushing deep red under the Italian’s eyes. But he is used to Vale’s antics and doesn’t bother to ask, safe in the knowledge he will find out soon enough. It’s good to have everybody gathered once again, some sort of closure and a new beginning at the same time, with a season that begs to differ. It’s a season that makes him nervous as if it was his first, being on the most competitive bike he’s had for a few years with the reigning king of MotoGP at his side. The eyes of the world will be on him more than he is used to. And he isn’t sure how it will feel to possibly battle with Vale for positions, because to be honest, they haven’t had that much the past two years and before that, it had been an issue in their relationship. Dani seems to be taking things well so far at least. Nicky had been worried the small Spaniard would consider him an intruder or accuse him of profiting of his misery, but Dani has been wonderful so far, even agreeing to help him with telemetry and testing. A pretty big gesture for such a small man, that Nicky isn’t sure he would be capable of if he were in Dani’s situation.

*******

Under the table, Clara nudges Jorge’s knee impatiently, cheeks still pink. She’d seen it in Vale’s eyes, he’d figured it out and so would the others eventually and she just wants to get it over with. Drowning in Jorge’s eyes, their hands clasped tightly, she has a wordless conversation with her boyfriend, ending with mutual nodding and the cutest, shyest smile around his lips when he clears his throat and softly starts speaking. In fact, he’s talking so quietly, that it takes a moment before the rest notices what he is going to see and Clara chuckles at the sight, when Jorge, blushing deep red now himself, starts over, stuttering a little, eyes on his plate.

“So basically, what Jorge is trying to say,” she interrupts the helpless mumbling with a broad smile, Jorge shooting her a look full of gratitude, “is that we are having a baby.”

**2016, First Race**

Dani and Nicky end up sitting in the Honda garage, shaky and nervous as always, but that is normal when you watch your husband on track.

”Do you regret retiring?” Dani gives the American a curious look.

”No, not at all. Last season was wonderful, finishing second behind Marc, once more ahead of Vale, that was great, but I think it’s enough. I’m glad I won’t be injured, I won’t spend time in a hospital, I won’t see the clinica mobile from the inside.”

Dani chuckles and he understand, so well.

”What about you? It wasn’t quite a voluntary decision in your case after all.”

”I know.” Dani shrugs and clears his throat. “I won’t lie, it was horrible last year. The first races were bad, being around everyone, all the pitiful looks and then that feeling that I just should be on that bike. But now, I don’t think it’s so bad after all. The job in PR is fun and I get to spend quite a bit of time with Marco now that Marta is back at university. So it could be worse.”

”How are preparations for their wedding going?”

”Well, I think they won’t do with a small ceremony like you and Vale did,” Dani chuckles, images of Roser and Marta knee-deep in wedding catalogues and magazines running through his head. “I think after we didn’t do a big thing and you didn’t either, Roser, Marta and Clara are determined to put all their energy in Marta and Alex’s ceremony.”

”Heard anything if Clara and Jorge are having plans?”

Dani shakes his head. “No, not really. Maybe Vale will hear something? Marc said Jorge was thinking about proposing at some point through this season, when they’ve settled with the parenting thing a bit. By the way… when are you guys adopting?”

Nicky chuckles. “Looking for more children you get to watch and play with but don’t have to take home at the end of the day?”

”Hey,” Dani feigns indignation now, “I even change diapers for Marco.”

”Woo, well, then I’ll know who to go to for advice. Nah, seriously, if things work out, we will do that next year, should be Vale’s final season then as well.”

They sit in silence for a while, eyes glued to the monitors, starting preparations for MotoGP slowly coming to an end.

”How do you think Alex will do?” Nicky nudges his knee and Dani shrugs again.

”Well, I think he’ll give his brother one hell of a battle this year,” he replies a moment later, smile forming on his lips. “In the beginning I thought Honda was insane to go with a pair of brothers but after I’ve seen them in testing… this could be the beginning of a dynasty.”

*******

”Goodness, he is still so tiny,” Marta takes the young boy from Clara, allowing the older woman a moment of peace and time to have some of her tea. Her eyes fall on Marco, who is peacefully sitting on the floor with his favorite – and by now, slightly rugged – stuffed ant and a book about cars. “They grow up so quickly.”

”I know. Ricard doesn’t even seem tiny to me anymore, he’s so much bigger already.”

”Can I ask you something?” Marta wrinkles her nose and Clara nods.

”Sure, go ahead.”

”Did Jorge pick the name?”

”Yes… and you want to know why, right?” Marta blushes slightly, feeling caught. “Don’t worry, I don’t mind you asking. Jorge picked it and I, at first, had no idea. You know, I never followed Motorcycling before we met and when I realized that everybody raised an eyebrow at it, I asked, but all he told me was that Ricky, Cardus, I mean, had been a very important person in his life at a time, that he had something to make up and that, if I could deal with it, he would love to take that name – and so we did.”

*******

_”So, a question to the three-times World Champion: how does it feel to share a podium with your brother? Any fear he’ll get you next time?”_

A broad smile spreads over Marc’s face, eyes affectionately resting on his taller little brother by his side. 

“Actually, it feels amazing and I am very sure he’ll catch me, if not in the next then in some other race.”

_“Valentino, you did it again, second in the middle of a Marquez sandwich, how are you feeling about that?”_

“Well, life is going to be hard with two of the bastards around the paddock.” Vale throws both Marquez brothers a smirk and swallows against the lump forming in his throat. With a hoarse voice, he finishes, “But honestly, I couldn’t be more proud to be a part of this moment.”

*******

Marc and Dani are sitting on their balcony, cuddled up under one of the duvets, skin still sweaty, hair damp, bodies spent and drained. The smaller rider’s head has fallen against the younger man’s chest, the younger pressing a kiss to his ruffled hair.

”We should really throw these away. You know, with Marco and everything.” Marc holds up a little pack of cigarettes.

”Mhm.” Dani hums approvingly, cuddling closer to Marc, feeling his husband’s heartbeat through his own body and drowning in Marc’s smell. “We should.”

With a swift movement, Dani picks the box up and throws it over the balcony’s railing, chuckling at the irritation and confusion on Marc’s face.

”I got us started, I’ll get us rid of them,” Dani mumbles, shuffling to straddle Marc and locking their lips.

”I’d appreciate it,” Marc whispers when they break apart for air, “You taste better this way.”

”Oh really? Well, so do you.” Dani leans in for another kiss and Marc lets his hands travel along the smaller man’s spine, feeling him shudder.

They break apart for air again, both panting a bit already, light of day faded into obscurity by now and in the twilight from the streetlights underneath, Marc marvels Dani’s face, losing himself in the affectionate puddles of Mocha and still in disbelief, full of joy and gratitude about everything life handed him on a silver plate. He leans forward, their foreheads touching now, Dani’s breath against his face.

“I love you so much, Dani.” He presses Dani closer against his chest, wanting to dissolve into the other, craving the closeness, the warmth, the feeling of being home.

Dani’s lips brush over his ear once again, shivers running down Marc’s spine and then the most beautiful voice in the world whispers the most important words into his ear that he has ever listened to, “I love you, too. God, I am so glad I found you.”

 _Love takes up where knowledge leaves off._  
~Aquinas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥

**Author's Note:**

>  _En la prisión del deseo estoy, junto a tí_  
>  (In the prison of desire I am, together with you)


End file.
